geo geller

April 26, 2017

wordsinline – from my little word garden patch

Filed under: — GeoGeller @ 3:35 am




Fixed Position

playing with words # simple poems to dream by or ” from my little word garden patch


lost a thought

looking all over trying to uncover and discover and not smother or be another invaded by strange visions a vision of a vision of a thought that i thought i lost and now i fight and fought trying to find myself in a lost thought

invaded my identity

possessed by the dream walking on a beam a tight rope walker looking for a theme in my dream floating like a feather in the land of heather invaded the identity of ee cummings fighting with poetry and painting that invade his being what am i saying what am i seeing

wine

wine a sip or two mind skips a few a wobble here and there walking nowhere and everywhere wine feeds the air nothing can compare

stirring the tea

a sound so simple as common as a pimple accepted as invisible and yet indivisible for many a symbol of moments between here and there of a time that is here there and everywhere and most of us are unaware

talking to myself i find you

stranger than strange inside out my mind thinks its strong and taut but out out damn spot the stranger invades with clout out out i shout

catch the sun

on the run on the run jump up jump down all around and around on a merry-go-round trying to catch the brass ring a song to sing ring ring tin-ga-ling tin-ga-ling i remember when i was young how i would sit and marvel at how the sun was hung and try and catch the sun before day was done

union of opposites

opposites attract maybe they don’t know better maybe it just a non sequitur maybe they are one and the same and whose to blame its a shame everybody walking around a star of fame we all come and go just the same

i don’t exist

i don’t exist i do exist she loves me she loves me not i don’t exist i do exist she loves me she loves me not i don’t exist i do exist oh what the hell i’m pissed

god’s home – disney’s house

across across 5th avenue for gain or loss stands 2 houses of worship a freudian slip at 55th and 5th maybe its a myth the house that god built and the house that disney built 2 houses built by worshipers of guilt and down the block a woman in her own world walks on stilts and i look deeply into your eye and want to know why?

like you mean it

jelly bean mean mean a man on a roller coaster beam sits up side down and about to scream as mr.clean walks by and yet and yet what do you mean? i can hear your silent scream

you don’t exist

i woke up this morning searching memories and memories of memories looking for you under and over in green pastures and looking past the past and beyond the last existence exists so some insists in a dialog i resist as i wonder as memories persist and memories of memories insist that one of us exists

left right corner of my heart *from the messenger of a lost battalion*

fell to earth emptiness recounted counter offensive the messenger son of man who lost the sun in the middle of the bulge expelling the last bridge combing my heart believed to be a mix-up walking into the buldge of the buldge ghostly mortar men in a moratorium recognized shadow of what once was process of elimination and illumination in and among the mushroom lies the blood of lost lies on men who died wide eyed shadows still walk the killing fields invisible foot steps in the snow show ghosts who are trapped in oblivion and no one really does know what do we really know a thin paper trail of memories and mirages contradiction in infliction’s barely surfacing for want of telling the unwanted setting the tone story of a lost battalion shattered minds running in the moonlight breathless voices in the darkness screaming in the wind – why me – have i sinned as another angel of a fallen soul gets pinned bled red white and blue its true a bad decision indecision for more than a few

running from the moon

reflection in the water following inside out and a dance about and remembrances past and future in a dream of thoughts and thoughtlessness kids feet running around in circles passing by as voices and laughter in the shadows reveal the surreal as i run towards myself only to find you looking at me in the mirror beyond the full moon as i run into myself

lystovichka – a swallow

first bird of the spring a little girl running up and down a moon beam a swallow soars and soars beyond the beyond and into dreams and all is well it seems

forget the unforgettable

train crossing hust puppies yuppies and puppies what am i looking floating on the other platform don’t i have to decide where am i going lotto, giotto and jotto what do i know

quiet day in my mind may 30 1999

quietly i stole a day for me not for you but for the me that is me in a dream i dream of moon beams and day dreams quietly i sneaked past the business of business and runaway runaway of endless distractions and endless needlessness to find myself sitting on the edge of timelessness embraced by everything and nothing and there in the deepest place i found you the you that is you and me

escaping the battlefield

the field of battle the battle of battle and the prattle of us cattle escaping for a moment beyond time and space and beyond this place and into a moment i am quite fond where quiet is quiet and the breath that is breathless and breeds since before time was time the breath that is yours is mine and that’s a very fine line

Poems from little black book

Man barks at passing girl Man sitting on bench barks something to passing girl And I think what she might think in her mind to such a hurl As she walks by and doesn’t even give him a twirl As he proudly smiles to himself and his eyes say what a guy am I” I see him in his minds eye Flying high in the sky

Lines that divide us

Lines that define And refine Also confine And are inline and out of line Some are full of adrenaline And others just shine But all sorts of lines try comfort us And bring us to us And then there are many lines that divide us From the us that is us

Exceptions are the rules

Sign on store front I don’t know if it’s a dual Or duel And fuel for a fool Who doesn’t understand the risk of being a mule And going against the spoken and unspoken rule Of the duel

The inconsiderable

Inconceivably inconsiderable And insurmountably miserable What can be worse than worse Except the curse that is worse

What I didn’t say on the day that I said it

What more can I say It’s all word play

Luncheonette

Johnny’s grill -you have got it On 25 between 7th and 8th In a little hole in the wall I remember was a port-o-call For me and my ole man When I was knee high to a tin can My father took me to work during holidays and summers Most of the time it was fun, but sometimes it was a bummer But that’s another story Johnny’s Grill resurrected king of the hill Of little places with a little bill Breakfast lunch and no dinners For the working man and the sinner And behind it all is Johnny standing proud and tall with his T-shirt saying – “you’ve got it” And I think you’ve got it all

The mysterious mystery

The mystery of life For some men it’s trying to find a wife For others it’s avoiding strife For me mysterious mystery Is still a mystery?

last record the last record of one’s life is in accord with one’s struggle, one’s strife and as for me, my last record will be well then again you will have to wait a see

falling words

words falling from the sky oh me oh my if I could fly I wouldn’t need words…. sigh

language as music

to some language is sublime to others it’s just fine others look for reasons to the rhyme me I think its all a matter of time

reverse time

reverse, inverse, and averse not so terse or something to converse and time to reverse this verse

tension between time and eternity

between the between and somewhere in between time and timelessness are spaceless spaces where time collides with the future past and present and the tension between time and eternity transcendent

among the unborn

waiting to plant to dream to not be forlorn to find a trumpet a horn to shout about and to dance, to dream to shine like a lighthouse beam the dream unborn, waiting to fly above the scorn

stepping over the boundary

Between this and that between began and begun between here and there and between this world and the beyond

Unfathomable

the older I get more or less I forget but as I get closer to becoming I realize I have been running in opposite directions introspection inside out I shout what’s this all about

transcending words – poems

poetry the play of words that play with themselves and in search of words strung together trying to get better and better but to transcend words with words takes a pen sharper than a sword to cut the heart out of you /me and feed it on a plate and after all is said and we’ve ate them maybe we will transcend words and hate

that’s all that remains

what remains of remains is what I wonder trying, to untie my imaginary chains that tie up my brain and nothing I do contains the thoughtless thought that remains

postscript

the thought of it what and will fit as I sit and I think maybe I should miss the last goodbye the last kiss and bury this postscript in my crypt

between the conscious and the unconscious

unconsciously conscious

I wonder to and fro and what there is to know but in any case thoughts above and below in search of the illusive show but then again what do I know

between the visible and the invisible

between you and me and beyond what we see what is visible to my I might appear to some to be lie and to others lost in the sky the invisible is too high to fly by

invisible forces

invisible man written on the mirror of the mind of all men and woman the forces of unintended forces riding on invisible horses into the sun on the run on the run invisible forces strange discourses

ahead of myself

peeking into the future looking backwards forwards and for more words but the truth be known my cover has been blown I’m even ahead of myself and this is the play to be shown

nothing else matters

the matter with matter is that to some every little thing matters and to others it’s matter of lack and others it’s a matter of contact and to others it’s a tactless tact but to me nothing else matters and that’s a matter of fact

memories reaching deep down brought to life

regurgitating the future from the bottom of what I am uncovered memory of when you and I began and before that to what is was and will be and then when was was and is is we shall have gotten deeper down than the wise clown who hides his frown Then maybe we will dethrone strife and be brought back to life

a sign from the 7 train

perhaps even an accident today I saw again a sign from the 7 train line “perfection is not an accident dissent and I in my mind search the recesses to find the accident to vent my discontent because accidents and perfection are in consent to prevent any mis-spent discontent on your part or intent this is my play of words and my event

confrontation between I and you

between I and I is you its true because before time and even a line of rhyme and even before before when everything was is and I and you were joined at the hips and lips and the beginning of the beginning when I and you where one under the sun and for some reason things came undone since then I and you have been trying to in the same shoe

hidden abyss

the abyss that I find my bliss well I would like to this the hidden abyss is found between your lips and a kiss

transparency of time and space

time out for time and space well that’s another place but the case for time and space by no means is too fancy as be beyond transparency

a song with hope of being heard

there inside lives beyond our divide I must confide even in me I have conferred lives a song without hope of being heard but do not be disturbed or perturbed I did find that life is not what I have heard

no less a metaphor

no more no less this I confess whether before come after or after comes before no matter what we think life is a metaphor for after and before no one really knows

life and death reflective ideas

reflecting on the idea of ideas on life and death seem to deflect the idea or maybe it’s just my intellect or combination of neglect but all in all the idea of life and death seem so far away and so tall we are all dying to find out whose got the call and whose playing with the ball

once and for all

all and for once and once upon a time when all was all and time ran out of time I am walking a fine line

The whole in which all opposites and contradiction are resolved

in the best of all possible worlds

where candid, voltaire and dr pangloss twirled is a space beyond this place where haste and waste and contradictions contradict and everything under the sun is a fine fit where opposites just sit that’s it

sterile world

look around everywhere sterility can be found nature is unbound and yet we confound the confound in a sterile world a child sits and twirls and I look through the barrel and at how we are in peril from air, water and minds that are sterile

nothing is lost

nothing is lost think about it nothing is lost except illusions have their cost but then again in the universe that is lost in reverse inside and out of verse you can neither create nor destroy only change it form and this I confirm even in a storm

four corners of the mind

memories hiding all around on a merry-go-round all bound up and tied up in a memory of a memory sorry but that’s the story there ain’t no glory in conformity

get back to nature

Advertisement on number 1 train of all places and I look around and inside and out at the myriad of faces and me included live deluded and sometimes even de-nuded but if the truth be known I wish it could be shown but it is illusive and has eluded get back to nature is natures call to stop being excluded find a place inside out to be secluded

wall of impunity

impunity rhymes with imm-unity unity and comm-unity exemption from harm a wall of alarm some would say charm me I think its time to go to the funny farm

triumph over love

now love – the idol of idols the ideal of idol-worshipers but what is love a dream it seems maybe it is the seam that sews us together in fields of heather and maybe its this or that or a new hat maybe it’s the dream of being less fat maybe it’s the wonder that takes us over and under and then again after its over like the illusive five leaf clover what do we learn why do we squirm there is no triumph over love I hate to confirm

silent witness

quietly I watch the world alone inside out watching life unfurl and I again a silent witness to life’s complete incompleteness and to this mess I must confess under duress I did digress

making peace with myself

what is this mysterious and ponderous and curious think about peace and I once new a girl named caprice and then there was felice and bernice I once had a friend who had a dog who looked like a frankfurter name maurice then there is increase and decrease and my neice but making peace with myself that is another story another piece but this I can say it’s finding a release before joining the deceased

I haven’t words for what I am saying

words have no eyes the mind is full of lies of what was and will be trying to see it all is a mystery to me can’t you see

exile from myself

exile – Self-imposed absence from one’s country or mind a place in another space where those who are out might be in if you like me find being in exile more or less worthwhile you’re not alone, stay a while it’s ok to smile

cemetery of memories

there in the middle of somewhere where in lies, truth and lies is found the cemetery of dreams and memories that have lived and died in my eye and the I that is I has all but forgotten why but it seems in order to be, free to fly one needs to let one’s memories rest in peace and die why, I don’t know why I wish I could fly

it doesn’t mean a thing my mother translation of some of my nonsense, pretense and offence but in my defence I can’t sing and my mother who knows me inside out and all about says ” it doesn’t mean a thing” words on a string as if I was in a boxing ring having taken another swing trying to get out of this teething ring I tell you sincerely it doesn’t mean a thing because I still can’t sing

in the home of the departed

sign on my mothers apartment and I think of the home of the departed and all the wonder of words like sharp swords and birds that fly beyond beyond and pablo neruda poems speaking for a dead mouth and now departed and I am always just started looking for my home home on the range only to find things deranged and in the home of the departed memories are now bartered

talking doll

there she is miss beautiful with all the right proportions and bountiful and yet she is appearing quite full of full and full of herself as a commodity on a shelf inside out she is hiding about a Pygmalion doll in love with all she flouts

who are we

the we that is we and the who that is me that is you and that are true I reflect maybe we are in some kinda strange stew me and you

draw on nature

a play on the nature of nature and as I mature in stature and draw on dreams and all that it seems I think of my mother and the millions of sewing seams and all her dreams and what it all means

Relentlessness

unrelenting relentless more or less most of us live in relentless stress what a mess I confess

de-you-man-ized

strangely strange how the world of you-man-ity and apathy and psychopathy have de-you-manized you and me from what we could be and I for one can see if we don’t learn to agree you-man-ity will get even closer to a calamity that leads to mass insanity


seriously divided

this is seriously serious I think to myself I must be delirious and then again I think of it al as very mysterious things that divide us from us and some might ask what’s the fuss and I respond with lines from west side story somewhere some way someday there will be a place for the us of us

can’t recognize myself

I look at you and can’t recognize myself and I think maybe its because because on walking home tonight some kids on the corner called me santa clause and I for a moment paused and wondered and pondered maybe I have become because and now of all people to be recognized its mr claus and I find myself in some strange cause all because I looked at you and can’t recognize myself

entering another world

another other a world beyond mother beyond safe and beyond smother suspend suspicions Supercilious circumspection’s before you enter find your center

reality a dream

dreaming reality hoping beyond reality for reality to be a dream a dreams so deep inside waiting to scream and I dance by the moonlight near a warm stream

unrepeatable

I repeat the unrepeatable over and over and yet I repeat I seem to find my feet in retreat from defeat and the worlds deceit a deceit that is so complete it is unspeakable and unrepeatable I repeat

hanging on my mind

hanging onto the edge as if life was a crowbar wedge and I in my mind find sometimes is better to let go than be in between the mind and a bind

running out of patients

running from running and running around in circles trying my patients and to find my patients

prisoner of the past

even though the past is past and the future will not last and we are all part of the cast and yet we can’t escape, it’s way too vast for us to outlast the past so the truth – we are prisoners in a prison sitting on top a ships mast and this is today’s fore cast at last

never run in opposite directions

walking through penn station voice from no where says you are here and wake up shake up never run in opposite directions and watch out for intersections

time out – inner peace

on the cover of time out magazine there is a strange play of mixed messages as if straight out from the mouth of an ancient sage the dali lama is coming to our nyc stage and as I come of age and closer to escaping the cage I understand the inner rage and the need to be more at ease and time out for inner peace, please

quiet zone

I sit in the quiet zone by turtle park in central park and I think of my favorite line a turtle only moves forward with it neck stuck out and I want to shout as more people invade the quiet zone – out out as a guy walks by talking on his cell phone and another comes from a far and I can smell his pungent cigar and I sit and wait for a sign from the turtle the star as I hear a baby crying like a movie star and his brother driving by in a little kids car as I get all this fallout time out out out as I bemoan and leave the quiet zone

sign in central park – don’t feed the wildlife

and I think how sad and how bad that many of us don’t feed our wild life and live in such self-imposed revolving strif and I again wonder, who, what and why we live such a lie and deny our need to fly and our own inner eye

just a memory

a memeory of a memory lost in time trying remember a time line maybe its just a sign of a life out of rhyme strang how memories derrange and rearrange and reality is unreal and memories are just memories that live in the mind and sometimes are just hard to find

no where to go

wondering where is where and where to go and where is no where here and there and everywhere and here I am and here I go

urban refugees

I refuse to refuse I refuse to be abused and dwell in hell and in nyc in my own world some might call a cell me, sometimes I feel like a refugee from hell

which was is up and which way is down

in an upside down world where everything is nothing and is unfurled I wonder to myself and to you if I can be boldly true you see I in my worlds view I can’t tell you with a frown which way is up and which way is down

indisputable disputable

everything is in dispute these days of illrepute some of you might refute but I can tell without dispute that I will not dispute that the indisputably disputable is in dispute

life and the truth is fiction

I don’t know about you but to be honest to be true if you only knew not to misconstrue and without further undue due and ballyhoo and a whole slew of kangaroo and my mothers chicken soup stew fiction is more true than true for some of us few

lost identity

somewhere some how even in the here and now you/me/we are in search of the real wow though some might disavow their identity and live as a non-entity in either obscurity or obscenity its all just vanity mixed with a little insanity

see justice (done?)

to see to be free if I could I would I ask you is justice just and just in case the case for justice is unjust I ask you again can you see justice in order to be free now me being justifiable blind and unjustifiably entwined to see justice you have not to be confined or enshrined but to be of a child like mind to find peace of mind

true imagination

imagine the imaginary for in the imaginary is found the unimaginable unbound and there in lies a truth beyond lies that is the spirit of you-manity in you and me that ties and lets the dream in all of us fly like fireflies and answer all our why’s

holiness of sorrow

a place beyond here inside and out I fear sorrow haunts the seerer and the soothsayer says of soulful sadness and sorrow beyond madness o’holiest of holy sorrow who is to know what is going to happen tomorrow and what sorrow is this that holds us in its grip and keeps us from soaring in our little ship

devious

mischievous and envious a little speechless not me misleading you its true we live in a seriously serious civilized zoo

the secret of secrets

I tell you know lies my eyes are my spies and sometimes the truth lies but the eye of the I’s and the secret of lies is born and dies in the I of I’s

perils of existence

life is dangerously dangerous and perilously perilous but if existence does indeed exist and i/you/we stop fighting and have the courage to desist then consistency would consist of a less perilous existence, I must insist and life would be a little more free you see

the message is believing

the message today is for us/you/ and me to say it’s a beautiful day to be full of life’s play

defying

defy defying and stop crying and sighing and stop lying start flying start flying start flying start flying stop whying

becoming obsolete

oblivion is unbecoming as I sit in central park sunning and watch runners running as sparrows fly by and I grasp for words on the fly before entering the obsolete in search of words like food to eat

I am a lamp

well maybe I am like a lamp I feel the energy a kind of synergy between me and all entity and may i/you/we in our simplicity can find a common complicity

searching for the it of it

harmony in art and science Einstein talked of art and science and of harmony and I listen very carefully I feel a little silly trying to find and define harmony event though I have been in harmony and have a hat to prove it I inspite of life and the play of it and Einstein looked at it with wit trying to find the subtleties in every bit and in Einstein’s shadows do I sit searching for the it of it

the obvious

obviously obvious and seriously serious I seem to search the universe in and out of verse for better or worse and wonder how blind I/we must be not to find the obvious obviously

strawberries know nothing about grapes

what do I know what do we really know and who knows what strawberries know no more no less no stress and grapes and what about apes what do they know about grapes and me I know the more I know the less I know but strawberries know know nothing about grapes I think is a low blow

the dread of the nothing

the dread of dreads the ultimate ultimately stikes fear in the heart of the hereafter and beyond and before and after and beyond the unimaginable and the rest of the babble is the struggle between the no nothing and the know nothing and this I can assure you is not nothing

forget me not

I forgot myself forget me, forget me not and me I forgot to forget and still living in some time warp trying to forget that I forgot myself as a commodity on a shelf and now I lay me down to sleep with little bo peep and the rest of you/me/us sheep

fragility is fragile

fragility of life fragility is fragile one needs to be agile but we spend more on trying to beguile with some strange notion of style and I want to escape to my own little tropical isle like the little prince where the sun sets and rises with a warm smile

floating on a cloud of sunbeams

if we lived in a world where nothing ever went wrong left right right wrong in search of my song a song to be sung that sings of the wonder beyond and begun a world of dreams where nothing is what it seems floating on a cloud of sunbeams

looking for answers and why

why o why answers seem to sigh and I in search of the answer to the answer have become a dancer in search of the why of the why don’t ask my how, what, where and why I am to busy being busy learning how to fly

totally understandable

understanding the understandable I must say it is totally misunderstood as I stood under the under in search of myself and you and the we that is who misunderstanding without being understood is like looking in a mirror to find you are totally missing your childhood and are greatly misunderstood

comfort yourself

man on t.v. says to me comfort yourself and you shall see and me I think what does it mean when sirens and car alarms scream and I fight noise inside and out and the construction site across the street has a similar annoying theme and I want just to live in a quiet dream

sign on a T-shirt

defeated by reality philosophically philosophical on going battle between the real and reality between war and peace between this and that between you and me time to be and defeat being defeated by reality is what I want to see

sign on store

be yourself nobody else will need I say more – standing still have good will

left memory

I seem to remember a memory but now it’s a memory of a memory a memory left behind as if unkind and yet some memories are bind us to being blind and others unbind and some define themselves by memories they find and re-find I think memories like lost hope tie and untie with a little lie I don’t know why anyway time to fly and say goodbye

imagination

imagination is imaginary a thought that seems unsound around and around like a merry-go-round trying to find and be found imagination witout it life is darkly lit pit and with it i sit and think about it where does imagination come from and some say this and that and everything under the sun but for me I ltell you I keep it under my imaginary hat and that’s that

living in history

the story of history is told in untold memories forgotten in the battle field of life beyond imagination beyond time floating in between the between where all memories eventually live in the endless unwritten book that hangs from a fisherman’s hook

reality check the question

reality check the question is is reality real check check oh what the heck

caught in the middle of nowhere

in the beginning of the beginning and in the middle of the middle and the end of the end and everything in between trying to see the unseen lost in a dream beyond what is and what seems

looking forward to looking back

trying to catch my shadow I look around and around like a hunting hound on the trail wagging an imaginary tail and a poetic tale as I sail between the present past and future tense intensely intense

rescue recovery

recover from rescuing myself from myself to fight another day another way to dance to dream to run away I say who rescues the rescuer anyway

conquering distance

the distance of distance between the illusive here and now between the spaces the mind races around and around trying to conquer itself before conquering conquering and distance gets to far in the distance and custers last dance was lost in a distant trance

sweet madness

sweet madness how sweet it is sweet madness sweet blis obliviovious to all of this how could I miss and dismiss the little sweetness a childs smile and an innocent kiss

invaded by invasion

victim of victimization

trying to be or not to be a volunteer of a seriously civilized society do you hear I say I am here I am here I am here

unspeakable grief

speaking the unspeakable

loss of loss numb from numbness common bond in the silent cavern mind/body and soul morning paradise lost innocence is the cost beyond the beyond grief beyond grief found the unfound unspeakable unsound waiting for times timeless release and relief from the unspeakably unspeakable

inside becomes the outside

inside the inside has now become a side of me that is outside of outside and as I slide through the wonder as a little boy on a ride ride em cow boy ride em boy as I dream of moments beyond when I was riding my first toy ship ahoy I remember jumping for joy

nobody knows what happened and why

2 woman talking on the corner of 26 and 9 nyc and I pass by wondering who what and why and realize I to with a sigh am one of the nobodies who knows what happened and why

victim of ambition

the ambititon of ambititon

girl with fountain hairdo says to me and I to you I don’t want to be a victim of ambition its true and I think I better find a shrink to look at the trap of ambition sees like everybody’s mission in this the home of the free and the brave and the motto written on many a grave and written on the you-man psyche of the slave

I seem to be a verb dedicated to running after ee cummings

I am what I y’am and also not what I y’am not a noun nor a clown not an adverb even though I disturb not a participle nor an adjective nor a thing but sometime you can hear me sing..

mystery of ourselves

mystery of mysteries my-story a series of his-stories ubiquitous to ourselves inside out mysteries sometimes shout out out and some just come undone others live inside and bring a little sun but most seem to run and run like a run on sentence sitting on the fecnce laughing at us at our defence

metaphor that breathes

breath in breathe out in…. out in …..out listen carefully and all about

posthumous present

apresent is the present yet most of us are ab-sent analyzing the future past and presnt common sense sometimes makes little sense and I presnt you the present before before becomes the past and the future passes past the past and we become post-humous and post-humorous

moral imperative of shadows

in the darkness is born light out of the darkness comes sight a sight of delight that fights with the night blind visions moral decisions ruthlessly denied repudiated shadows dance wth themselves where once was whatonce was and now banished by the bright light

night of nihilism, of nothing

horror of no-mans land land of no man night of the end of the end night of silent silence’s and quiet emptiness night of absence night of nothing voices in the darkness make haste make haste desert of wastes imagine the imaginary embrace nothing nothing is nothing in the night of night illusions dance with shadows of lost memories waiting for you

facing nighmares

embracing human nature a nature sometimes inhuman and lost in darkness that truns away and in onto itself nightmares wealth and downward journey into the self core of imagination of vision fighting tension and incicision visions of bosch and dante lost sanity with vanity facing dark night of the soul in the face of the unrepresentable and the void of avoidance facing imagination of the abyss and all this we miss

out of order

order is out of order i order you to order thought like mortar cement disorder and this and that on the edge of the border and yet trying to find myself in order in disorder and then again the sign on the mind says out of order

you have a right to be here

right right right left right left and as right as right could be and you , you see like me have every right to be and to be there and to be

hope was left standing

when all is said and done and everything under the sun has left at the point of the gun and even none has gone and run but in the corner of the mind you can find in the garden hope left standing undone

betrayed by stopping grieving

lost at sea program on TV vanishing thoughts of vanished people vanity and vainness vanished at sea seamen history repeats itself as man at sea disappears In distant fears can’t stop grieving otherwise quilt will betray the memory of his and her story of an end to glory

absence is real

absence of light no no-light = night sightless sight spaces between spaces metaphor for before and in search of absence holding on to the real reality compelled to dwell on the unspeakable reality and of an absence that is real

reasonably unreaasonable

this is know reason is unreasonably and unreasonably so as the seasons are sometimes unseasonable and thinking is unthinkable and dreams which once seemed unsinkable and un-inciteable and all that seems to be reasonally reasonable sometimes becomes unfeasible and foreseeable so and forgettably forgettable or is it unforgetable – I forget is this not reason and proof enough that reason is reasonably unreasonable

afterwards and after words

towards to words two words forwards and for words and four words on wards and on words and on top of words in wards and in wrods and into words out wards and out of wards and after words afterwards

a dead line

verging on the ver of a moment beyond beyond and about to turn the univers with an inverse verse I sit on top feeling oh so fine refinnning and definning a verticla metaphore on a horizontal line only to find I am out of my mind not only have I missed the illusive dead line but now I have to bury and morn the loss of a line that I thought was so fine but now is as dead as a dead line

death is something that belongs to life

life is something that eludes most of us with strife and me I think life is like a man riding a bucking bronco horse and then of course there is divorce and discourse but mostly I think we are waiting for some one to save us from ourselves a knight who comes riding on a shining whitehorse of course of course

trying to get in step

little girl trying to get in step with her bigger little sister skipping stepst to be in step a poetic metaphor for being in or out of step and I think of yep better to be that be in step and that’s my bet you bet

beyond me

quietly lost in thought I see you I see me and sometimes I see I see the we that is we escaping the revolving door of aspire and despair as I try ti fly in the air a child walks up wide eye looks me in the eye I ask you what more can there be as I begin to see

a fly on the wall

I sit on the park bench amidst nyc in the sweetness and stench watching the parade wheter his is a he or she is a she says the singer ont the loud speaker as a guy walks by with 150 nike sneakers and I a fly on the wall watch the invisible from a tree that is tall the symphony betwee you and you-manity and me trying to see beyond you beyond me beyond what is and what will be

I hear they want to hear what they want to hear

summer stage central park July 11 1999 – voice from far and near I hear in cacophony not so clear in a distant sphere I hear they want to hear what they want to hear and think what do I want to hear in search of a line that is fearless of fear what do I want to hear something calm, sweet and endearing from some one dear do I make myself clear

the enigma of Beethoven

pounding in my ears I hear Beethoven fears hearing the un-hearable seeing sound un-seeable and unbearable a sound beyond sound beyond myself beyond the beyond trying to bond the images of the universe in a verse and inverse a play of colors painting in my mind eye as I and Beethoven fly beyond the enigma oh so high I ask you why

not my intent

drunk at 110 st and number 1 line dancing a fine line not my intent having spent his last sent with a scent of booze I think to myself how much you loose by getting lost in a bottle of booze and I remember you snooze you loose as the drunk mumbles and bumbles and stumbles as the number 1 train rumbles and I try and write these lines that fumble all over the place and thing these play of words are also not my intent but then again one has to find a vent

from here to there or lost and found

how to get there as sign at jfk airport on the way from a to z stop a k only to find I have been kidnapped from here and there in another time I am looking again for the fine line on theroad to a poetic rhyme but all I find when I get from here to there is that I am on a merry-go-round and have found the lost and found

traveler in a strange land of my mind

stranger than strange the minds dialog of diatribe thoughts like weeds are seed that creep in to quiet waters regurgitating reruns variations on a theme scream once in a lifetime dream traveling through tie and the mind as a stranger in a strange land the band plays on and on in a play within a play and I try to slay the silly play what can you say

kept in isolation

the heart of the heart but art without hear is empty beyond empty a heart kept in isolation sinks without inspiration

living slowly and enjoying without haste

quiet happiness moment of being lost thoughts in times timelessnes

walking inwards discovering sounds of silence moment beyond time stands still into a dreamscape of quietness in wonderland contrast to vanity of hollowness of more is more remember sign on the minds door stop look listen taste, live slowly enjoy without haste

the race

the race between me and me and you-manity to to a place beyond insanity a place so wondrous and fond yet we race in such haste that we waste the gift the taste of life and live in such strife and at the end of the race win, show or place we look for solace for being in the wrong race

running commentary

comments on the common the uncommon common and on and on commenting on commentary I think not I think so running to and fro and you man the plan of the plan do what you can

didn’t get the message yet

the message is the message and yet and yet what’s to get sunrise suset don’t forget now do you get the message yet

escape into escape

a seascape of mindscapes landscapes escape the mind beyond the beyond escaping escape before before more is not always more and less is not always less and get me out of this mess

___

Moan echoed throughout the world.

chaotic situation on a merry go round the sound and sights abound looking in the mirror i found the found that was all bound and i think what a chaotic link as i put pen to ink and consider the situation and my intuition and listen for i too have been bitten and stricken and now i am sicken j’accuse – accused of destroying j’accuse able gance filmed the battle of verdon as the solders went off to find the end of the end and no one won one on one they marching in line hup two three four hup two three four they sing and sang as the death bell rang as they went of to their destruction with some strange instruction to die for you and i as he shot them with his camera of memories to be shot on the field by bullets without mercies they marched and marched to the sounds of groans and some misbegotten glory oh so many wars so many died without telling their story as they laid their in the mud and dreamed of nusrery rhymes and bed times now i lay me down to sleep my soul to keep and laid down like sheep to sleep the sleep that returns the soul to the deep so many dreams did die and many a lie did fly oh why oh why i ask my i when will learn not to listen to those who think they are so sly a black hole in history efforts to exterminate history offended his/her story tends to trivialize denigrates the future conflict of infliction deflection of dereliction reduced to reduction destroy the destruction brutality is brutal Nothing like it time to quit i submit violation of a tragedy unattended humanity up ended Victims and victimizers turned into ashes ashes to ashes witnessing a nightmare nothing can compare warfare going nowhere beware morally right morally right left right left a man sits on himself bereft and left of left and wonders if the right is right or just another plight of mankind who has a history of being unkind and hiding his sight and his insight and disguising himself at night to fight the unjust fight to the sound of men marching left right left right off to fight for the morally right left right left right erasing identities no comparison in scale or scope a prisoner of the mind of hope nothing could do to save themselves ourselves looking past to suture the future sound of silenced voices murmur invisible man walks into the mirror trying to pierce his own armor cleaning the mirror of his mind echoes of macbeth behind out out damn spot looking for the me that i forgot searching my soul battle is over uncover the cover looking inside i must confide i did hide i ride and i ride like the highway man if any body can and i find myself on the calm side and my eyes wide wider than wide as i walk by battle fields fought and lost at any cost walking past the past like burnt out remnants of the cast and at last i woke up today and at this moment all i can say the past is past and i now can go on my play free in my way “- A monument to times gone by obsolete incomplete a man walks into his tomb lies down waiting for times gone by to pass on and by and i think maybe the monument is a figment of my imagination a fusion of limitations and illusion of confusion a lineman searching for a poetic line and i think to myself – just fine sitting in the weeds with nothing to do thinking that someday i too will be a monument to times gone by – before and after me is utter silence contrary to appearances earth blowing up through a whole mind wandering inside itself long way to come to go to find myself in a desert under i wait and wonder searching my soul down under finding my in-site i in-cite and re-cite a line dangling from my mind as another lightening strikes the likes of you/me/us )- listening to sirens of my mind listening to sirens of my mind pygmalion image i find woman of stone in the mirror of acts changing facts distrubed presence running into closed doors open my mind find find sirens bursting raw thirsting for a new beginning freeing the soul from running around in circles unburdened from the cowards grip touching poetry - heroes’ welcome i look in the mirror and welcome myself home after a journey to the center of time a little rhyme and to another dangling line i think of maybe i should be divine oh see saw and he haw waiting for the band and the parade to play i survived to escape another day and should receive a heroes’ welcome today – historic breakthrough man/woman finds self historic breakthrough as if through and through and life is found for just a few wondering about in and out so what else is new “- to break the cycle of violence to break the cycle of silence stop the violence stop the killing, nobody dies willing stop the killing before and after the soul needs laughter not disaster stop the cycle the cycle of damaged soul of slain innocence of lost illusions of loathing and pain and the fear and the stain that comes from being vain and the vanity that leads to insanity stop the tears that tear the heart from ear to ear and you and me who are we *- growing increasingly hollow letter from friend at the end of her end talks about growing increasingly hollow and i wonder if she was putting words in my mind my mouth if i allow as i look at my past and think of at last maybe i too have been there in the past and i wonder in and out and about my mind thinking of all kind of thought and distraughts i have brought upon myself while sitting on the shelf and watching the world go by as humpty dumpty had a great fall and all in all as i put the pieces back and say to my self that’s all walking the streets of memories walking the streets of memories past the once were and of what will be the past with out me someday and all those fellow travelers on the road to nowhere i pass myself at sea and i’m still looking for me memories around each corner in a see saw with time swinging form a poets line i think of past moments walking around in circles in my mind i hear the voice of a young childs laughter and think of you in me and the hereafter and i find myself after all after, after – pain abounds around and around the sirens sound as if in a nightmare that is unfair and full of scares everywhere you go and so it is that nobody can say no and that is why why is why i ask myself who is so sly that they think they can escape the landscape when pain abounds all around and around - you called i was out the world was about and well what can you say no message no yea no nay and the horse did say hey hey and well next time ya have something to say say say oy vey try again another way or another day no hope in death freezing misery emotional damage what has happened what has happened to them to us squalor in a spectacular landscape. it’s is a shame its a shame I suspect in retrospect run by bandits thieves and pundits refugees of the mind trying to find and get out of the bind before its too late before all the hate robbed by masked men who have robbed themselves of themselves in a song of a desperation so long that sings of inspiration and yet un-sung holding on to life to the ladder, the last rung of man and his son on the run on the run before we are undone thinking twice. dantes advice no hope in death @- imagine what its good bye to good bye and to ourselves and themselves and to the dreams and little elves and slip into silence and out of time and the end of this, our little internal rhyme - nothing but the whole truth more or less the truth and nothing but the whole truth so help us and save us from ourselves as time marches on and we march on and on and out of ourselves into the beginning of the beginning… freeing me from mediocre thoughts and childish memories of lost innocence and dreams of dreams that only existed in a dream of my mind and i think to my self where have i been… and i see in you where i have and have not been and louis armstrong whispers in my ear what a wonderful life it could be and i think no more but dream of making sandcastles at the sea shore and myself in myself and playing with illusions of being/living more or less in a strangely practical world a world with out dreams without imagination - timeless timeless how many times the universe flew by and bye and i i was lost in the thought of my eye and the why of why why oh why i wake up only to find i have been asleep in my mind _ there is no winners only is my universe if full of poetry… writing in my mind… realizing that it is what it is not on the winding road of my free form mind that takes me while wandering and wondering through the landscapes of this and that and thensome and so i play with the thought of what is and what is what and what is not playing around with a moment between me and myself and i smile inside out and swallow the sun playing is such fun and the universe laughs at me and i laugh at it and all is well as well as well can be as the clock strikes the hour and the silly hour tries to run off with the minute hand in search of a second to second only to find the sublime has run out of time and yet there is no winners only is and i think of you in me and me in you and i feel and feel i and i think to myself how could we be we and we be not we and i laugh knowing i am me and i am you and you are you and you are me where ever we be and there is no winners only is… ,- dancing with mirages looking in the mirror at my own mirage and image and wondering where i have been and in whose soap opera… time open minds and quiet deepens the souls view of its own holes in a whole so i think to my self… where have i been and who have i been and what have i done to myself… and time move on in strange ways how we don’t appreciate the things we have and that nothing is ever good enough and the dream of dreams becomes an empty dream and maybe the we that was us was a mirage that was you that was me wanting to be somebody and you to be the somebody to me and moving in and out dancing with mirages i seem to see having fallen out of the dream reflecting of fear and of loss of loss and loss of fear and i see that you who used to be me and the me who use to be you is now become the they that was us and the us that before time began was they and now we live in distant worlds playing with words and minding the empty store waiting for customers of the heart to return to find us sitting on the shelf of endless dreams and thoughts which have no thought and laughter that echoes in the mind oh mind oh mind where have you gone on a trip around the world only to find the beginning of my tail as i wonder to and fro and frolic in lost thoughts of dreams that believe in the fair tale a tale that fills the spaces between spaces in the heart and warms the soul only to wake up to the sound of my foot steps through the landscapes of my mind as i wonder if and when and where and who i/you/we are and i walk towards the light of lost thoughts trying to catch myself before i fall into shadows that have been walked on as if as if. and i say to my self before entering oblivion that it is time to catch my dream and free you/me/us from the bondage of singing the same song over and over to give flight to the spirit of the child in vi rt of silence in the wonder of the wilderness built on wonder a world of little giants abandoning the past shutting out the future deserting the souls silence simple things plain sailing what lies ahead join the adventure - died courageously sacrifice is shining and rhyming is dying and lying is trying to be an example of bravery and devotion in the face of all the commotion and lost emotion a man walks into his shadow and the dog goes bow wow and a passerby does cry and says ciao and i wonder how and everything is up side down and inside out and all about and well what a way to die and why be cause the eye of i says we must die and be an example of bravery and devotion and die courageously for somebody’s ghostly worldly fancy sometimes i think maybe i am blind looking in the mirrror of the future i see what appears to be me and a person walks by look in their eye and i and i try and fly but without a sky it is difficult to lie and yet many do sigh and i refuse to be transformed into a legend that is deadend a legend in my own mind searching for others who are kind but then again sometimes i think maybe i am blind - reflection of last survivor of a dead epoch hard to admit those who died for a great struggle died in vain an absolute disaster and absolute absurditiy absolutly intrigue no truth in it whatsoever letters scorched in the souls memories walking through the shadow of death final warning – t-shirt man waitress with tatooo facing inside out with hands grabing her soul sitting in a coffee shop watching you and myself writing madly thinking sadly looking for words to string together to make some sense badly trying to remember who i was then and when a shadow flashes by i remember why stranger than fiction is friction missing myself i search for signs on sign and then again maybe i am the last survivor of a dead epoch - man walks into the mirror and bumps into himself deeply burdened man walks by carrying his shadow a wood pecker knocks on the door trying to find himself the child listens as the adult walks and talking around in circles man waks into the mirror thinking he has found the future all the leaders of the world point figers at each other life is deeply burdened to people who are you and not you man and woman are in a dance of to an endless tape i think i hear my mother calling have you found yourself yet can’t hear myself think can you man walks into the mirror and bumps into himself shot us as if they were hunting rabbits.(response to kosovo) report from the hunting ground around and around and profound confound, dumbfound and spellbound man walks around with a heart wound shoot shoot toot toot of the horn at the start of the hunt sombody yells begin the affront its a man-hunt the sound of the sound of a strange cry and a sigh uproot root root uproot toot toot off in the distant memory is heard the sweet sound of yesterdays lute and flute and another victim of mind and souls pollution no solution to desolution and the toot of the toot of the childs horn is now so full of anger and scorn wondering why it was born shooting rabbits and people with different habits perpetrator and victim become partners in a strange hymn somebodies whim benumb and inside beating the same drum sharing a common bond little do they know both have been conned both have been damaged, savaged, ravaged and in need of being salvaged stifled screams can you hear the stifled screams around the world is heard the unheard the end of dreams of humanities insanities can you hear listen in the shell of my/your ear +- supposed to reconstitute and i wonder what and what wonders too and i think maybe and wait for a replay as i ask again why and look low and high and wonder what it means to reconstitute and find myself struggling in my birth day suit and i ask if today is the day or when we a re supposed to reconstitute - letters in a poem shake my mother said she read this poem where every letter did shake and me, i struggle with letters as a baker trying to bake and hunt my mind for words where every letter is a symphony in a cake and i shake and shake my mind trying to find words and letters that fit so kind and shake your/my mind my mother she tells me to listen to me and i will see she says son ya betta not run life is short, not me I retort and run along singing my silly song looking for words that sting and to string along she tells me the poem she read is not one of mine i think to myself oh thats real fine or as my father would say when he came home after a hard day some fine how do you do and i would think hm him too and i wonder what my mother thinks of mine as i stand on the edge of a line.. _ liberty (thinking of war and kosovo) on passing the statue of liberty thinking of liberty and why and the many wars and people that did die and did they die for somebodies lie i sigh and think and i wonder why why o’ why the human spirit has forgotten the mirror in the eye and why we fight, why we die and yet liberty is in our eye and are we so blind and often not very kind and i ask myself again and again and don’t know why why o’ why we do what we do as i sigh and wondering why liberty does not die from all the lies that we lie and how often do we have to say goodbye goodbye makes me/you want to cry - closure in wounds that have been open ever since man walks into himself and who’s to say whats the way as i lay awake in my own way and think if closure is sure or just another way of deluding myself another day and i wonder in a world down under ever since that day that you/i/we say in every way but but… the book is shut and there is nothing to insure even though since that fateful day obtaining a bit of closure in wounds that have been open ever since the day - outrages upon personal dignity its a pity that dignity isn’t dignified and life is not fortified and you and i suffer from eye to eye and wonder why and i ask you and you why o why you lie to the eye that is you that is me and i also lie in my eye and its an outrage upon personal dignity ain’t it a pity citizen of mankind kind to man the sign says when you are born do not scorn be kind as kind can be i think of he and she and me and i wonder what kind of world it could in the land of strangers who could would and should be to be oh me can not predict when when is when and when will when be and don’t you see when is you when is me and then again no not again a nursery rhyme with a big fat hen can’t remember when but then there must be more to life than when and then maybe life is just waiting for another nursery rhyme and the big fat hen row row your boat gently down the stream life is but a dream now you can scream - rejoicing in the freedom the freedom to be to see of who but me you see i am you i am me and well do tell that life is sometimes hell and other times its well and anyway we need to find our voice and rejoice because you are you and i am me and if we could only see how happy we could be - transparent language voyage into me trans-aparent-ly i said see look out look about wait i’m late i’m late for a very important date wait wait at the gate there are many transparent aparently look at you look at me and see the we are transparent ain’t that aparent - breathe deep  breathe deep wake up do not sleep breathe deep weep no more for before was before and war was war and time to find peace of mind and our common you-manity before we all are swallowed up in insanity breathe deep wake up, do not sleep not so simple mistaken taken and retaken and liken to a patchwork quilt tilt and save our selves from wasting time and questions lifting around and around in and out up and down above and beyond and i see into you into me and think maybe it’s time just to be desert desert not too sweet not too sour something like a flower to devour on a merry-go-round on a merry-go-round who me what do i see what do i know i believe you i believe me all around i am bound around and around on a merry-go-round talking to myself talking to myself i agree i agree there must be something to me let me see fear of fear fear of fear waiting waiting and waiting i want to know and not know at the same time not knowing… why why why and why is why and what is what and i wonder in and out around and around not knowing not knowing worse than knowing and the mind dances with questions as i wander to and fro back and forth up and down the halls of my mind waiting, wanting to know before i go don’t you know ? in search of myself in search of myself in the mirror i look to you you look to me and what do i/we see i look away you look the other way self conscious unconscious in search of myself in your unconscious and discover there is no you no me and that you are you and i am me and that we are we and the truth be told i have a headache -end 24 hr who i’ve been to me who i’ve been to me hard to be without you without me but then again who am i and who am me looking in the mirror i begin to see… who i’ve been to me together we are together and alone from time to time again and again as if in a dance i jump through hoops in my mind trying to find myself in you in me and i think to myself… if i could only see together we are together and alone just a few lines more just a few lines more words strung together on a clothes line of the mind a metaphor for what was before before and even before there was time and beyond the beyond and before my dreams hit the floor just a few lines more within and without within and without wandering and wondering within and without a dance of the mind in search of a little something someday i might find the real me – the secret person inside a little secret scout no doubt fighting with words fighting with words i wake up in the morning trying to open my eyes to see if i still be thoughtless and thoughtful and free you/me and i think to myself as words creep and crawl and i hear something as my ears stand tall and the quiet moment that was before before as more words upon words begin to fall and fill my mind with the long the short and the tall like a grafitti wall and the quiet that was my all is no more and that’s all taken for granted taken for granted who am i who are you that we should forget who to forget to appreciate the big and the small and the tall to see it all who am i who are you that we should be so small and think we know it all who am i who are you stand tall on tip toes eat it all from my little word garden patch from my little word garden patch trying to find a little vision to hatch trying to find a little this and that letters on letters strung together words on words on a tether dreams on dreams in a letter mix and match trying to catch a little vision to hatch from my little word garden patchÒ y˜ about question not why here deliberate made point deepest pain not responsible had to be something else something no one else could ever know about and found out and thats about about - not so simple mistaken taken and retaken and liken to a patchwork quilt tilt and save our selves from wasting time and questions about question not why here deliberate made point deepest pain not responsible had to be something else something no one else could ever know about and found out and thats about about - denying clemency did not hold great hopes for the final appeal the deal is the deal it is real incredible and inedible difficult to accept act of desecration denying consecration brought out hate at the pearly gate and wait the bait wait wait have other ideas does nothing last once we are gone the future is what matters - trying to find nothing we could have done about it things just happen not often but thats what they do speak more freely everything within power to insure and sure not to drop strange to fight and report real war remains in side wounds of war stress depress worried about complacency decency and inter dependency forgetting the hazzards fighting off the routine is the routine remoteness of life we don’t see whats going on removed from the self without any losses stand off delivering destruction out of the way way out to day world keeps revolving near quite clear do you hear - trust instincts thats all you have art of knowing how far to go to far find the star at the same time connection carrying a poem around for days finding the plays what you don’t understand heart of what we are talking about oblivion various worlds sweet time embrace it undescribable poetry puts a face on it not able to get away with it all the same family which means we are living and dying together gone like that… - day dreamer loved it without knowing never done anything happy took place never regreted could have been good come to something passion for passion passion for giving nerve ending the what if as if no in between could have wound up homeless for what ever and what happened where was the moment that bought it to this moment thats amore a metaphore love or die fragility scorched earth giving birth to myself and what is wealth start yesterday before today is here to a metaphore mutilated the soul and the whole and what is what war which is war knock on the door knock on the door its all all and disconnected into the dis contented and the time to awake and shake the mind from being blown up and said good by and shape up could have done a lot more had been everything wanted and all of a sudden snatched away and day by day growing up in a tribute to debute to live in a dream to get to that point back to the point of the point living a half a life where has the life gone before is gone gone and more or less less is more before is before unable to stop surprise myself freedom space - gotta be more than that no idea it works surprised surprise working out demons reflections of reflections to get right running away from the thing you want most fear of fear and getting what your most afraid of looking over the edge afraid to jump wanted it all gotta be more than that gone away to think about out of the out around and about stepping in side out what has gone and come about and of life what do we know a rainbow in a sea said the blind man i see i asks the blind man a question that which has caused many indigestion is there a deeper purpose for you for me and the see laughs at the sea for not seeing there is a time to be time to fly time to live time to die i don’t know why and about the rest and the nest and whats best i don’t know why and what is this test is it just a jest at best gone away to think about the about - not myself then who am i if not than what and if what than not and what is wh †§  laces and spaces of my mind as i write to you to me songs that have no words and words that have no song and what do i see but a butterfly landing inside of me and where are we mirror mirror on the wall talk to me - surgery of our souls you who once were me and me who once were you and the we who once were we i try and see but time to flee time for you for me to be and let it be free into you into me my eye i spy looking though and through at the me who is you i try to see the wonder of me and wonder how it would be to be oh i wish is could see into you into me !- images we had hoped never to see again. again and again the cycle of the beginning to the end of images that scorch the soul only to remind us… we are not whole and again and again we repeat the same cycles to the echos and cajoles of a hate that does not abate as we walk through the not so pearly gate to wait to wait as the images scroll and take their toll on the innocence of the damaged soul - my enemy i sit in a tree feeling like a slave to you to me my enemy and wonder about you and me and i think about the setting sun and what was fun and the wrong that was to done and now we are un-done and i sit in this tree wondering about we and try to be free and see that my enemy was me (- why oh why can’t i fly said the little boy to the sky looking up at the mirror in the sky i see birds and butterfly and wonder why oh why and i dream of being high and i with my little third eye i ask with a sigh if i can’t fly will i die why oh why can’t i fly said the little boy to the sky - consumed by anger … running around and around in the swamp of the mind turnig over and over insearch of the end of time and another line drops from under mine and words sturng together in a see saw of a letter and time marches on and out of sight and we listen inside to a diming light and the beginning of the sun is again un-done when anger is begun !- no amount of will power will over come stuck in stuck within a silent scream a dream but in the end of the end no amount of will power will over come - bringing the outside in and the inside out bringing the outside in and the inside out a poem to see to help you find your to be outside in from the depths of the within when will it begin and the inside out i try and shout but nobody is there not even the march hare and the wizard of oz does stare and stare i care i care do you dare _ no end in sight no end in sight once upon a time when time was upon us and sight was out of sight and beyond the beginning when the beginning was the end and beyond the end and the unbelievable was believable and the believable was unbelievable and the sightless could see beyond you and me and there was no end in sight _ beyond what one can bare beyond what one can bare straight to the heart that which can not be possible is possible and beyond compare and what one can bare do you dare begin at the end _ slipping out of life slipping out of life sometime, somewhere, somehow whether young or old or old or young like when life was just begun or the setting sun and in the middle of the middle are you and you too in search of you and the mysterious who and all of a sudden something out of somewhere but mostly out of nowhere says wake up… be aware the land of nowhere and here and there and every where the world is about to stop no more time no more time outs no more cop outs as the clock that keeps time to our internal rhyme slips slowly out of time and life is what it is and is not and no longer is no longer and the ending is ending and the far away that use to be at bay and i think to myself we are begun like the cycles of the sun we begin the dance of life until all is un-done and like the setting sun sometime its time to say like to lose everything, just imagine can’t fathom but just imagine what its like to lose everything, to have your life turned upside down inside out and all you can do is shout out out damn spot spot that no nothing can compare people like you/me/we walk by in a procession of a living nightmare and stare and stare in a deadly snare can’t imagine what their and there and i wonder who thinks this is funny before when life was full of milk and honey as people in trench coats cutthroats and dare think that they are just and fair no fair it’s not fair said the woman/man-ity its a pity to see what has become of we “- shift in the balance a balancing act of this and that and i think about all of that and balancing a ball before i/you /we fall now you think i might have gall to say this to you all but to hell with hell have a ball - what will remain what will remain of remain after the setting sun when everything is almost dune and life seems on the run and i walk to and fro in a dream of some times woe and i wonder what will remain of what is sane and i think of you and me and who we be oh me oh my have you looked up in the sky _- The cost of rebuilding inside and out up and down and all a round what do i know !- No one knows better No one knows better birds of a feather flock together to gether and i in way and sometimes in my own way say let the feathers flock i am going to my own little rock and play by myself in a land of my own wealth — Reconstruction has become urgent the man in the street says to himself walking past the mirror of his mind and wait a second who is that looking at me what do you see its me its me do you see i was never here here i am i say to my self in my mind – sitting on a shelf in a sea of see here is here and there is there i ask the mad hatter and the hare where oh where are we 2- turn backs on the past and look to the future how. the man inside me say as a wave of thoughts crash in front of my way and i wonder if today is today or is it a play day where i will again keep the future at bay and live as usual in thoughts like a carousel sits besides the well of my hell and i wonder if turning back the past will last and if the future needs another mind suture and life moves on and on and whose to say what is the way oy vey (- saying good bye to myself sitting on a shelf i watch myself as if as if i see fading ever so slightly a glimmer of me on a voyage soon to depart i think of my start and how life sometimes is bitter sweet and tart and that the real me that is me is sitting quietly up some palm tree - free yes yes yes it’s good to be free you see “- after goodbye goodbye goodbye with a little sigh ask why oh why is life a little white lie and i see saw between you and me and ask why oh why when will memories die and when will i fly on a high that is high and i ask why oh why why i ,- yearning towards wildness wildness in the wilderness of my mind see sawing in a land of the boring a wild child i find my self beyond yearning as i listen to thoughts that fly beyond why and why i ask myself as i spy some gleam my eye as i yearn and i try to learn and unlearn to be the me that i would like to see disbelief that this could be i wonder in and out in a state of mind that is spaced out and i see with eyes like that of spies i look inside out and all about and in the end i see you i see me in disbelief that this could be !- mirror into my soul looking into the crstal ball into the all of all and writing this from the soul of my soul i try to see if i am me and as i walk around and sit upside down i seem to be found in strange p ÅÌ  at as i run around the ground and the earth gives birth and i see me and what will be will be and new idea is free aye eye and i if not myself then who am i moral corruption freedom of speech to some is in need of bleach and to others its just another immoral moral full of sterile words in search of a character lost at sea in a world between you and me the eruption of corruption has caused much disruption as moral as moral can be fight for the right to be free but mark me they want to be free to be but not you and me we are the moral corrupt who are upstarts and erupt and disrupt the corrupt can’t be bought the soul of my soul the heart of my heart the center that is and is not and i got what i got and well you can try it buy it fry it steal it peel it and everything else in between i don’t want to be mean it can’t be bought and that’s the way it ought you tell me side to side i ride i ride to the ends of my mind in a bind from side to side i look far and wide and what do i see you tell me nothing else will matter its a matter of matter and thats the matter because matter is and is not and well in the end what do we got !- angry at me wasting my life in an empty strife twisting and turning burning and burning in the mind , on a stick and give myself another kick for being so angry at another or other and for being so blind and not to see i have been unkind to me in a battle with myself – able and cain inside, again and again i look for another refrain but all that remain is time to cast off the past and at last off the last and to see it is me who is am angry at me - don’t you see i am me i am me i say for all to see look at me i’m up a tree don’t you see - we must bury the past before and aft the past is past and we must we must with the just of the just bury the past before it buries us – seeking forgiveness for the slaughter and destruction left in the wake and those who do take the soul of innocence cut out from the heart just enough just a part and all in all the short and the tall forgive and forge a bridge over the gorge of the mind and leave the future to the future and the past to the past and seeking forgiveness is sometimes needless and endless stress that endures beyond duress and sometimes you just need a little finess – wake of destruction imprint of distrust and violence silence! silence the silence perpetuated by the memories that collide and don’t abide that can be traced through time a fine line the Spanish Inquisition and the Holocaust. end that legacy at any cost to humanity end the insanity start on a new track get back get back alas and a lack citing apocalyptic and cryptic mirrors of Crusaders and invaders want to say that that was not really what message was about out out red line cutting through the heart and my art in the wake of destruction !- vengeance in a manner contrary to popular belief we are in need of long felt relief and a new chief what does that mean it does seem that vengeance distroys the one who feels it and it is it and one needs to sit and knit so as not to get lost in a fit of vengeance in a manner needs no banner ‘- precautions you should consider prior precautions you should consider prior to being born and what you aspire you should consider the ire and the fire precautions, precautions notions and lotions and potions will do no good unless understood you should consider the bidder the blabberer the idolar and adler and the tongue of the adder prior to being born be prepared for scorn and to be forlorn and adorn but most of all don’t toot you horn !- lightning strikes lightning strikes my mind a flash of light that blind lightening my mind waking up to the thunder us and to realize that what we want from others is what we have to give to our selves before the before becomes the past and we grow beyond growing beyond the sweet everlasting . a-men he says to himself as he lets the sweet dove of youth and dreams free to fly into imagination and to you my dancing with mirages partner it is time to part and part the ways of time… and free the imagination from being a prisoner of hope _ .. when i was 12 when i was 12 do you remember running around in circles jumping up and down inside out, outside in looking for something and nothing and finding myself in everything club soda with splash of casis club soda with splash of casis i write on the west end cafe napkin waiting for myself waiting for you sipping life through a straw as i slip my mind beyond time two guys on either side have slipped through time and the music blares some guy screaming some unintelligible truths while i write through you through me and come up for air with another sip of club soda and casis strangers strangers thoughts of myself in a stream of obsolete obscenities stumbling on you on me on and on but wait a moment a stranger speaks to himself stranger than fiction i find myself lost in your thoughts can you hear me/you hear i am writing to myself hear i am writing to myself in a world of my own making making time in a twilight zone of the mind squeezing words through a black hole in my mind to speak to who to you who listens without ears to who who sees beyond my mind beyond my thoughts beyond time as the lights go out and the music stops and the din of people talking goes on and on as i listen carefully squeezing words out of my mind lip reading lip reading ever wonder what is what and i lip read your mind before there is… is there… say something i say to myself in the mirror ever wonder what is what is as i lip read beyond title of compilation is maybe # simple poems to dream by sub title poem for kids to read to adults and adults to read to kids possible opening poem – a poem looking within words turning and jumping around around and around upside down inside out and outside in i find myself looking within only to find you with a big grin freeing me thank you for freeing me 1, 2, ,3 ring-a-levio i see you i see me ring-a-levio is free to see to be thank you for freeing me stick yourself to this stick yourself to this matter of fact fact of matter it’s what matters that matters guilty of being guilty guilty of being guilty too much too much too much please be so kind find somebody else who is not so kind thinking about thinking thinking about thinking you think so i think no before and after and after before i don’t know what to think went to see the world and never returned went to see the world and never returned around and around i’m on a merry-go-round with pop goes the weasel i jump up and down in a see saw of the mind trying to find the mirror of my human kind can’t remember what i lost can’t remember what i lost lost words lost poems into a see of forgotten moments can’t remember what i lost impossible situation impossible situation life moves on glad to be allan watts spoke of finding security in insecurity setting us free i remember not entering paradise i remember fighting with me impossible situation now to be free i was your island i was your island you where my I and i was your you now you are me and i am you no longer are we disguise disguise going around and around i bump into the you that is me and wonder who is who and what is what and why me what ya gonna do when i’m gone what ya gonna do when i’m gone i cry for you you cry for me i’m leaving you your leaving me what ya gonna do when i’m gone end of green paper what a wonderful life it could be what a wonderful life it could be sing song man with a smile beyond imagination beyond time beyond space beyond the noise of this space this place as i gently sway to and fro in the quiet tree of my mi Žð  nd while someone singing over the loud speaker beats his chest and his drum to the sound of some un-intelligible words which must mean something to somebody but i hear louis armstrong singing in my ear inviting me in to be here cafe talk cafe talk click clack take this take that over the sound of people talking about this and that a silent dance where everything is said and unsaid over and over again and again one hears half words and thoughts fly bye and i sit here wondering who are these people and why cappuccino, screams some guy and out of the void of avoidance i say to myself not i take a closer look take a closer look see if you are you and if i am me and together we are we take a closer look and see if maybe its time we see we dancing with words or wonder about wonder dancing with words or wonder about wonder a woman walks buy holding her heart in her eye carrying some instrument i can’t see why behind her is some guy dancing with his bass (base) and a smile rises up on my face as the past fades fast and i wonder if the future is before us or aft as a vision of a vision appears shooting stars with african spears i wonder about wonder from head to toe and everything down under visions of the hole in the whole visions of the hole in the whole and i wonder if we all live in some black hole looking at shadows in socrates cave shadows beating chests to the rhythm without time and life moves on and on out of rhyme into the deep but i only once in a while do i take a peep afraid to discover what i might un-cover out of the deep of my sleep quarter to eight quarter to eight sitting in a coffee shop sipping hot chocolate waiting for myself to come through the door… but i am not here to meet anybody so what am i writing this for i guess i am waiting for me what more can i ask for in search of some sanity in search of some sanity face upon face searching this place the parade passes bye and i wonder who is who and why the you that is me the you that is me in search of the source of the dream that washes up on the shores of my mind and i thinkof the past that is now present and time that once was and my ancestors ancestors and the dream of their dreams and wonder who is who and what is what and what will be what will be and then and i think of the you that is me and quietly just try to be cup of hot chocolate cup of hot chocolate i read the future of you-manity in the tea leaves and to my surprise i see a reflection of me of you i take another drink and the universe disappears and nobody fears and then i wake up to find i am still holding my empty cup put yourself into this put yourself into this a poem is a poem if you can see you in me and i can see the me in you and together we can dance to the unheard, unseen and unborn sound a sound that is so profound outside in i start to dance within poem an instrument of the soul poem an instrument of the soul i reach beyond the beyond into your being and in my search i find myself in you and in you i see the beginning of the beginning i found how silly and profound it must sound to find you in me and me in you the voice inside the poem the voice inside the poem the voice that you hear is here inside you inside me i hear and am here everywhere and no where you can’t escape i enter through your eyes, ears, nose, throat, mouth, heart, skin, soul as you enter me and together we try and see… now do you see me ? a collision with dreams a collision with dreams the train pulls along the soul the conductor collects the toll the cost i think i’m lost no words can convey what one has to say no words can convey what one has to say fading mirages and innocence i laugh and i sigh, sometimes i cry as i look at myself in the eye what do i care what do i care as i say with an air a soft breeze is blowing words through my hair if i may dare say what do i care if the world wants to stare so it ain’t fair i have no hair what do i care i am still me and that makes me want to be me drifting along with my thoughts home of funeral sign 6th and 8th on 14 stree in mad-hattan the home of funerals and i stop and think of the last resting place and home home on the range as i pass by on my way to dreams that fly as my feet stop don’t ask me why maybe its that i just had something sweet or that i am in heat as i think about fun and the unreal and fun-ereal are unreal and how i don’t go to funerals because they don’t celebrate life but death and more stife and are strange and surreal as i think about how nobody passes go and the monoply that we all know and it doesn’t matter who you know when your or my time comes well who knows… lost shadows (rosevelt ave station) lost shadows of sunshine beyond time of rhymes that are stuck in time as i watch the shadows of people walking by people who have spent their day if i may say their life times in persuit of what i ask myself what is it that makes us us as i watch the shadows going in and out some bent over others old and young walking about races and places of people from near and far as i watch a drunk weaving to and fro and think he must of just come from a bar and i think empty thought and things between lines of a dreams wondering about why the guy across the platform is laughing and screams as a homeless man yells back some uninteligible themes and i wonder what will become of the them that is me as i try to see through all the mirages and appearances as the train dissappears between me and time as the lost shadows stare in the night and i take refuge inside my warmth as everything fades out of sight lone wolf lone wolf what does it realy mean i for one seem to swing from beam to light beam oftenit seems going up against the stream spending most of my adult years it seems throwing spears between my ears as i a loner and alone at least inside my own mind i findits sometimes more kind moving language/images images lurking like like notes of the unscalable scale swirling in my mind on a seesaw of riples to the sound of the language that you and i hear from steeples and on and on voice speaking volumes of images and images speak in the language of camouflage and moving at the speed of light and sometimes we find a little insight to in-cite spectator observing the observer in a mirror i am seer and served beyond me and you observing the observer beyond what is what and what is true is me and you spectator of the the spectacle a comedy del arte wearing a mask i see what i see the observer is you in me intellectual fencer even though i sit on a fence looking at the world kinda dense i find an undefinfinable defense which makes some kinda sense and yet intense intellectual sitting on a fence clues you can’t miss or you’re lost there are some clues you can’t miss whatever or whomever you kiss it’s like this if you like me live in an abyss and are clueless of this then all i can say is maybe someday you’ll stumble on bliss or if you do not pay attention you’ll stumble on something else you would rather not kiss the millieu of uncertainty in the middle of the middle and inbetween the between but before the end ends and somewhere it depends… there is the middle of the millieu where i and you its true its true uncertainty is us too so what else is knew… just hanging on hanging on to an illusion something like a turn on that hangs on and on and like this verse in vica verse and inverse and reverse no matter who what where and when is on we need to just hang on and wait for the little bon bonsd victim of disappointment victim of parts of the sum sometimes just plain dumb sometimes life is just a bum run buut to be disappointed by disappointment is treated by annointment that needs no appointment and the the only ointment is adroitment diminishing hope hope of hope hopelessly tied up with a dope light dimming sinners sinning spinners spinning tall and short tales around and aroound the world of innocence fading i try evading as deminshed minds and mediocrity blinds sad to say hope for you-manity is on the the verge of insanity underground – this is not a movie (#1train line) (response to turkish earthquake) while ridding the #1 subway line i am thinking of all those who have been burried a live and now lie on a turkish ice skating rink in a line this is not a rhyme for those who have lost time but an intropsection on under ground for those who watch and watched themselves die because they where trapped and unfound what confounds and is beyond me and my imagination is what i would think and do you see what can you do when you’re trpped and can’t flee as the E train comes at 42nd st and times square trapped indide out mind and body in a death defying stare at that which you can’t compare or atleast beyond my little worlds unfair affair the train stops at 5th and 53 as the announcer says next stop lexington avenue and i think about those who are and are not and will never be and what goes before they stop to see and what does one do when you see yourself fading from view and you are one of the many and few who are trapped friend and foe in a strange common zoo and i think about the dammaged souls over and under the stone as the light fades and faces and beings faces death all alone as i too am trpped between the lines hopelessly trying to chissel to refine and define the undefinable last moments queens plaza the conductor says no R train as i hold my disdain again for the ny city underground subway as a subway vendor walks buy selling live longer batteries and i see a passing billobard that says last gasp of summer and i think about the nature of nature and of summer fading and the people still a live and who we are and what we are and how we are still slaves to the lie ghost of myself confront ambiguity a terrible secret stands accused of worse. The tangled tale embodies the madness of in the land of nightmares, where nothing counted but killing or being killed. whatever that might be responsible for lives in a war with almost no rules. The enemy was inside and out all around, didn’t know who was who who is who who am i who are you didn’t know who was who or where or whether is was you they were. The dark, the confusion, listening for sounds that signaled death, the tension, the terror. Suddenly asked to make a choice, life or death death or life who is who who is you who is me who is i and what to do pulling and pulled the the trigger the trigger. Oh, God, what did i do what have I done? who is who who is you who is me who is i and what to do the nightmare of nightmares never goes away. The shame the guilt the remorse haunts the haunted did not want to make personal anguish public to dredge up agony again forward an even more damning chain of events admits to, private pain reopening hard questions about war, memory and guilt. tangled tale of ambiguous ambiguity acts of fear and despair, conflict conflicting with itself collections of recollections tragic mind carnage embodies in the mirror the madness of madness playing hide and seek seek and hide judgment to judge make the endless reckoning of dark ghosts inflicting the inflicted the affected by disastrous conflict. conflicting stories sleep arise sleep arise like a ghosts a serpents sting reveals the unrevealable… listen can you hear the howling wind of yesterday howling to the coyote in your mind… history never stops being and being and haunting the future the present and rewriting the beginning rewriting the end… re writing to be written. a figure of public a figure of war with ambiguity a hero survived grievous wounds grievously wounded, who once sought the unsought And because the ghost of ambiguity risies up from the dead reminds us that good men are not all good and ghosts of ourselves did terrible things in the fight with ambiguity making us examine the un-examinable the unknowable what does it means when ambigutity in the name of honor is separated and peeled away from itself from the warriors war with himself. get, got wind of on the wind the untold story of adam and eve and eve and adam a big story. commander of ambiguities heard from troubled and doubled unit of un-unity, led by and out of and from the dead sea of ambiguities of you and me and me and you had been had hidden had been what was not seen involved in the revolving in and out of within went horribly wrong. visitations of incantations ressurections and insurrections memories regurgitating reverberating pursuing the pursued the tale of the dog chasing his tale until the until turned up the heat and boiled over into the street action “after action” inssurection resurection report reporter reports on in the isolated isolation of the mind pleasantun-pleasant Late of late contemplating a second run to out run the run the reporter reports hands, mouths eyes ears nose and throat.. lost at sea knew what didn’t know we knew actions and reactions on that terrible night no longer a private affair. a private affair who does really care what and who cares really “There’s a part that wants to say to you all the memories that I’ve got are my memories,” “and I’m not going to talk about them.” memories of ambiguity are ambiguous and jealouse But did he, he did. and so And so found self talking to self again and again, this time calculating calculated effortless effort to tell version of subversion or sub-version or in-version di-version…. the story investigating the investigation appear to be appeared on and on a segment of These are ambiguous times condemning the condemned a view with out a view of the end of the beginning the beginning of the end] where right is right and wrong is wrong and right is wrong and wrong is right and dreams youth the hope of the world playing billiard with possibilities life is about tomorrow where did it go tomorrow feeling alone no more than expect don’t give up set mind doesn’t seem real need to believe in realize your dreams everybody is alone just some people don’t know it stand stood ground determinations go on with out end the war to end all wars people have to be allowed their fantasies honor always at stake compromised in order to get the job done you pay to be in politics shadow of a cloud over and under heart sick a lost soul go along get a long elected by the ghosts embrace the horror the end is always near filing the enormous void that is unfillable desolate putting moral thinking ahead of practice do as i say not as i do imagine how thing would be if they ought to be then as they are rain of ruin never see before whats the matter with anit-matter and for that matter its a matter of fact or fiction what is and what isn’t and attraction is anti attraction in a magnetic metaphor of what is and came after before and further more there is more to more them what is in store and some sell their minds and other their bodies and every one is a whore as little bo peep lost her way and wound up sitiing by the sea shore with dreams of more of more and me i dream of genie with the light brown hair and singing songs that matter to anti-matter as a matter of fact ticks the mind plays with me search echoes for memories scared to be awake scared to sleep scared to be or not to be… which describes how a man use to be a union of two and how zeus split man in half and that love is the feeling when man finds his missing half- the desire to find ones other half or to find wholenss everyone is seeking something and trying to make themselves whole no risk is risk-free trying to free myself from my prison of searching for some endless wealth i seem to be caught in a scream indefensible to defend a dream that has no beginning no end looking for the door that is just around the next bend trying to free myself from the prison of being risk free lost as if caught in the decision of indecision no risk is risk free echoes in me i repeat no risk is risk free over and over trying to free me and yet in the end is the beginning as i try and flee and make some sense of whether to be or not to be risk-free ome body you knew once only person that can make you numb is you the chase motivation isn’t one less things have to do why hard time talking about zone fading into oblivion can’t change until you can acknowledge negativity set up failure see flaws… can’t hear because doesn’t hear sounds like somebody you knew once impersonating myself *(stimulated by listening to conversation of peter brooks on charlie rose) becoming a stranger to myself becoming a stereotype ill-im-inating and ill-um-inating i sit looking at you in the mirror of me wondering if maybe i am not who i am and you are not who you are and maybe right is wrong and wrong is right maybe left maybe too strong bringing together while taking apart taking apart while bringing together ingredients of agreements pulling pushing together and apart i am someone i once knew am i you ? impersonating myself you are not me i am not you i am someone i once knew what is true don’t look back look forward look inside look outside look again don’t look back success is meaningless meaning is meaningless take a chance may i have the next dance chance to take chance to give coming together coming apart ah! a moment when something clicks feel… afraid to feel sensitive, insensitive empty the emptiness empty of emptiness interpretations are mis-interpretations songs and incantations revelations perceptions afraid to ask impersonating myself asking the question is it a weakness to ask questions what is this this is what? in contradiction with contradiction impersonating me i become you impersonating you who am i what is true impersonating who, i become the who is who in/out of touch with the mystery of what i once was are you honest and fair a voice from hamlet echoes in the air to be or not to be do i see what is it to be asking the question what is this stop impersonating me i say to myself hamlet out out damn spot thinking too much gets us into trouble thinking and thinking and rethinking the unthinkable like this and like that like it or not… to paraphrase impersonating who who is who language is missing profoundly influenced by empathy stalled waiting for self fullment ending struggle for simple survival waiting on line for life relating to to time and timeless curiously curious relating in a seizure cast of characters frozen in time lifeless efforgies anti expressionist process drained of personality accused – casting life from life wearing a mask in around and among composing space temporary vs peranent what is tradition mentally dangerous every one an artist imitating doomed to be secondrate better to become yourself how do i see the world what do i understand what do i know about the word and how i see it effemeral momentsry questioning piling more on provoked makein up a never coming off the canvase the frame around the pountry the boarder temeprementaly recjecting encounter makeing it up elegance to crudity forging a head embrace new atitudes willing to go along with new idea have to realize and realize do something new new realism climactic moment we’ve come a long way or have we another depth a different kind of depth appetite for something interesting visual drama somthing happening its my experience urge to communicate for the happy few suspeicion in the air crowding the heals causualty of art begin to see more and more trying to be a human being not a clasic or demigod gradually art is made by men simply a man speaking to other people cant stop thinking… can’t stop being alive life is a costume party erupted collission of values believe in the idea of the abstract surrogate sacrafice moral delema colapsed history impossible themes survivor a galaxie into a higer realm is normailty enough how do you know what i am dreaming about dreams of the poor snaps shots of in trigue dream bigger artist should not matter about pleasing the world is litter people are little life is little… what will i do with out my euriceh make me think of things i have forgotten once lived for art first wonder live well most of us are gamblers with out much nerve one day we wake up without much to show for it try to get some joy open the door to that place did not know before the sweetest sadness the heart tells us what it knows brought up ingnorant every person must give birth to itself to find the heart again defeating myself struggling against gift fighting itself to feel eager we hate what we can’t understand uncommon in a common world cut away what is easy then what listen to your heart it will not lead you wrong world is waiting nothing stand in your way the ideas people live with to feel the earth under bare feet to smell the green of dreams to listen to the sound of quietness between the breeze to sing with the birds as they dream the dreamers dream to fly on high with laughter in the sky.. to play with wonder beyond rocks and mountains and to sluber beyond wonder to hear what one can not hear… a vessel of wonder only a fool would put out a sunrise i am and am not hadn’t decided to kow all there is to know to know and not to know what is there to know a story of lost and found and unfound and confounded foundness easier to forgive then to forget to be free imagine wonder glued together umbutu – humanness a lie is hidden between two truths wondering which lie to believe fog surrounds the emptiness connecting the inner space of our minds the more deeply we look into things what is rock made of what is atoms made up of mostly empty space what is matter made of real things have become abstract concepts what is mentality mysterious mental world world we explore in our minds mentality emerges out of the mystical world something deep we don’t understand true reality doesn’t exist the physics of space drawn in the imagination space is subdivide but still the same where is the point space is the same everywhere at all sizes only exist in our minds mystical view of reality Pythagoras was a dreamer drawing in the sand imperfect realm perceived by the mind absolute notions one example of possible examples transform yourself the object inside the object assuming what you can’t see filling in details from past experiences to complete our assumptions we see the world in our mind bee see ultra violet pictures of reality depend on our own imaginations brain filling in details… vision and consciousness more then just elementary particle physics more then the things apart phenomenon of consciousness is wholistic science has no description of consciousness consciousness consciousness points in the direction that there is more then we know… not about what you want its who you are everything old is new again as we get older we get younger and in the end the old man becomes full cycle and becomes to himself where he himself began and where we began is where we end and in between the ending and the beginning there is a place that has no place and is a place that is in its own space and as everything is part of everything that isn’t and will be and won’t be and and ever and ever is for ever never never land is where the beginning and the end began and today is yesterday and tomorrow and where will it ever end and the end is the beginning and the beginning will never end and til death do us part and yet to part is to never part and to begin with there is no beginning and end its all apart of the birth and the death and the beginning and end are new and old again and and and the fear of being seen the fear of being seen look at looking see and seeing, be and being the uncertain uncertainty of being The desire to be oneself to be at one with the self fear of fear fear of seeing the fear of being seen, the fear of being alone the fear of being not alone the fear of being the fear of being not being being impossible impossible being being an impossible being the impossibility of impossibility the possibility of the impossible impossibility of seeing oneself, seeing the impossibility in oneself fear and desire desire and fear fear of desire desiring fear fearing desire fear of being seen the struggle for struggle the struggle for identity, struggle for territory, a movements of moments of birth, love and death. fear of being fear of seeing the fear of being seenFar and away Always think “Out of focus”. surviving reality invaded by reality once banned uncontrolled chaos standing at the cross a victim of fractured fairy tale a disjointed narrative chaotic tired of being as realistic as could be? who are you who are we defined by tragedy a central message Is there ? a question, a contradiction a metaphor for everything and nothing, the past, and the possibility of a future are present and past darkness mysterious incongruous, innocuous…unreal futile fertile longing fighting in the mirror like solidiers on the brink of life and death for the biggest nothing a reminder of the other side of life making something from nothing and nothing from something with and without lost in a fragmentary fragment a Story of a Life Lived Between Worlds antidote for doubt this is a reality check… reality check in a land and a time unsuspected flourished and then vanished, leaving crumbling cryptic symbols radical departures from reality. i ask myself in you what is reality are you/i/we real or is it another banality protons and electrons in a bumble of jumbled energy bouncing off walls the mind and time stands still and not-still and until the beginning of reality ends and all is not still still protons and electrons bouncing in and out of harmony bouncing off the space between space and energy between you and me and i ask when will harmony be in harmony Waking Life sleep walking talking to myself talking to you… talking the talk with a deep, dark secret puppet or puppeteer anthropomorphic trying to fit into the story the illusion of weight and contact with the ground what is between reality and un-real-ity where thought is thoughtless and time is timeless and where once was once thought to be just space and emptiness and now fills a gap between the gap in reality complexly mysterious its not the survival of the fittest but the fittest who survives and who survives reality the most unrealistic who survives reality this is a reality check… reality check are you real.. are you real are you you are you real you real who am i… who are you is this real where are we what is real surviving reality you are much more than that at some point you have to stand up to yourself is it worth defending ending sending bending redefining proclaiming self unselfishly moment of intimacy a world away in the non existant haunting and hypnotic as complex as life itself seeing from the inside out you are much more than that at some point you have to stand up to yourself is it worth defending ending sending bending redefining proclaiming self unselfishly moment of intimacy a world away in the non existant haunting and hypnotic as complex as life itself seeing from the inside out nobody saying at least not yet not more at ease missing the point defying logic placing bets need answers can’t give who are you who are you doesn’t make sense bottled up findings unfindable circus nothing wrong answering to no one imperative afraid of implications more human human destoying the truth believe what you want no place safe enough waves running through the soul lies are not lies but simple truths don’t want to hear this life is not a bluff very little reflects what we believe risiking life… maybe indefinite there are times this is one of those times extortion check your vital sighns discover yourself and revive yourself observations – signs in shock of life life of the lifeless desolving where man is seen older then memory the tragedy of conflict fallen into despair history haunts itself sheding tears covered in terror and madness the conquerors are conquerored by the conquerors big mistake lost in being important who i think i am… power and control all conditional find unbelievable an accomplice to the unconscionable exhalting and exulting shocking the conscious need to be innocent not even something we should think about lamenting perversity and perplexity of logic what to do next lost at see in the black hole of the mind deep in the recessess of nowhere is nothing and everything where in the darkness lives the unlivable the unthinkable the unknowable the unknown the unbelievable the inconceivable where all thoughts and thoughlessness resides insides and outsides insiders and outsiders a magnet for the un magnetic where opposites are opposites and positive are negative and negatives are postitives and everything is energy and energy is everything a microscopic web of nets that weave constant versions and inversions revising the future and the past in and out around and around a merry-go-round where it stops no one knows and nowhere and every-where is to be found and unfound where the begining is the end and the end cycles are recycled and regurgitated reruns of holes in the wholes theories about theories trying to catch itself and catch the uncatchable the untouchable the everything of everything and everything and nothing at the same time a vacume cleaner that is never been cleaner storing the unstorable the un-story-able living, reliving, the unborn and the dead dreams of dreams and memories of memories an inferno full of darkness and starkness lost at see in the black hole of the mind the sink hole of all that is and isn’t where not everything or everyone is kind and everything in between listen carefully can’t you hear yourself scream as dante takes us on a voyage beyond time beyond place into the darkness the dream where the black mirror mirrors the hole in the emptiness of the soul that follows us around from place to spacless space from sea to shining sea from shore to shore.. as i write this wondering why i/we have sold ourselves and become a whore to desires, words and ideas that are part of the human store and story and what more is there in store for more and more of less in times of stress lost at see in the black hole of the mind where nothing that is something escapes the nevernever land to be a whore is nothing more or less than trying to sell our own private hell that we dwell where nothing is not nothing and something is not something and nothing and everything is lost and found in the where-ever that is every where and nowhere every-one is no-one and no-one is everyone and no-one is who they/we are and everybody is forwards and backwards and for sale and not for sale sitting on the shelf of the mind a sort of self suffering blind where no-one sees what they see a mass hysteria that worships being blind and where no-one seems to be able to find peace of mind and where ever i look i look in the mirror and see a reflection of you in me and me in you lost at see in the black hole of the mind. waiting for another bus that may never come i sit watching my mind watching my mind waiting writing on clouds of thin air … watching for nibbles of fish on my line that i cast out to see in a sea of mindlessness trying to catch the uncatchable the thought that will be food to fill my emptiness my thoughtlessness… waiting for images and words and wonder of wonders and thoughts and dreams to share as i paddle up stream i watch and wait for another bus that may never come for something to stream out like mind spitting spurting spewing volcanoes… fire hail and brimstone from my mind i sit and watch you watch me watch you watch me as time upon time rolls in and out of time and rhyme that has no rhyme and reason rolls along like hot molten lava from my mind covering up as it passes by rolling along at a timeless pace in and endless race to everywhere and no where in search of the unreachable the unsearchable for just a hint a glimpse of the unknown and the unknowable as thoughts rush by tying my minds eye as i try to sift through the landscape as busses carrying thoughts and illusions load and unload going and coming… coming and going.. and pass in and out of stations in life in and out of time and place of every place waiting for another bus that may or may not come… but i a prisoner of speculation wait for in my mind any moment godot will come through the door on his was for whatever is in store.. i wait for waiting… and i wait inside listening to the chatter of nonsense that passes by as if going somewhere on the road to nowhere and always i watch the watcher and ask why do i die before i die.. why do i have to waste away living a lie and die before i have to die as as my incessant intense dialog with nonsense and with you the you of me and me the you of you that goes on and on like waves in a sea an endless see that seems to run inside of me and you and me and who is who and who is not who and the a dialog never ceases to cease as a revolving doors that beats like a heart beat… dadhu dahdm dahdu dadhm and i with dull tools hammer and chisel watch myself in the minds eye chiseling away the stone to free the angel in my bone.. and i listen to Michelangelo listen… listen to michelangelo listen… listen listen can you hear what michelangelo, van gogh, dante, da vinci, heard… listen carefully there is more to be heard then what we hear… and i wait listen and wait alongside the side of the road for another bus load another bus that may never come to take me away from the struggle that is life that is struggle that is life that is struggle trying to make sense of sense and nonsense looking at you in me looking at me in you looking listening seeing dreaming of being the be in to be or not to be… and to escape the robot life…the walking wounded… in search of the unsearchable for the poetry in life and reason and rhyme and i don’t know why and who i am and what is it to know what one knows and what the rhyme that has no rhyme and reason and time that has no time.. and why do you/i/we all have to wait for the bus that may never come… why do we have to wait for the bus that may never come… why do we have to wait for a life that many never come.. peering out of glass eyes, eyes glassed over in a gaze that is glazed the dead look up the living look down… eyes touch and roll around and i have been touched by eyes… time marches on and we march in time to a time that is out of time.. and the aborigines are a people out of time and in and with time and i/me/you/we are out of our minds with keeping time.. and what is it to be on time and in and out of time and what and why is there sense to sense and does anything really make sense… and tic toc tic toc… life runs around the clock tic toc tic toc… and from now and till the end of time and from time to time… and who says what is and is not and who is this spectator that kazanzakis talked about in a letter to his wife.. and who is really who..and who is really who and who is really who i ask you myself and i .. who are you and who am i and who is really waiting for the bus that godot sent becket on and who is lost and who is found and who is sisyphus and who is not and who are you and who am i… and who is who… and where is where and what are we waiting and searching from and for and for and from… and what is it that we all search high and low for… and in searching for what we know and don’t know and what is it to know what one knows and not know and what is what and what is it.. and what is and what is not… and einstein smiles and sticks his tongue out from a picture in my mind and says imagination is more important than knowledge and the phone rings and rings and i don’t answer it and when i do its too late i have missed the bus the bus the bus the bus that never comes never comes never comes and and time stands still and goes around and around and i ask myself in you when do we start living,.when do i stop being you, and when do we stop dying and when do we begin and when will ever ever end and when will they ever learn and when will i/we/you/me ever learn and what is there to learn to learn and when is when and when is the last words out of igor stravinsky mouth…when?! the saga never enough life long stirred passions had not known larger then life everything an arrow in the heart magnetic center of the center the producer actor director the audience in a uniform who counts in history and why and uphold the bold driving and pushing desire to fulfill surpassing thoughts chief of nothing to be a rainbow to be the same is to do the same to be at the front line its the order that you don’t obey to live with style going over the top life is a double purpose the key is not a key littered with bodies of thoughtless thoughts sharing risks the challenge is daunting glimmering light fire works in the little acts of insanity is when we are most ourselves and moments of great insanity are great moments of poetential.. don’t trust ourselves fear of failure is our largest saga don’t feel like self source of embaressment to be general of non-existing image grouping desperatly and futile out of the picutre not meant to be understood thoughts that come out from despiration not a defeatist pacing sensing moments of greatness we continue to pace… and pace and miss the moments allowing self to be mislead hold tight retreat hold tight retreat hold tight refusing to acknowledge reality there are times from the shadow a despirate moments abandoning self some orders must be disobeyed the knowledge of the past are the future out of the jaws of death all consuming ppassion determination driven prolonging a lost cause dismal looking for heros symbol of the daunting spirit parade of endlessness strong to know when weak and brave enough to be know with lack of grace personalizing issues feed by the battle oportunites where others see problems chance for redemption setting sun debate is always far from over.. a vaction from who you are somebody who you are not on the brink of extinction living with a contradiction filtered info an afterthought the drive to know who you are discovering the garden of edien inside yourself audience composes the player learning from one another recomposing the world describing thuings differently difference on listening and hearing curiosity in search of understanding deep connection the good book may not be so good creating good and bad the good book some creates not the good you only know the value of something until you have lost it twilight zone of the imagination i imagine i imagine that somewherre between here and there is the floating world the nowhere place where the imagination resides as the ebb and flow of tides and i ride the wave of no wave in and out of the twilight zone on nowhere and everywhere where the imagination does hide and eyes closed and wide i must confide i never thought of the floating world the twilight zone of the imagination as a place in the depth of my inside no matter where ever i go my heart is where no matter no matter no matter what matters or not a voice from within speaks and splatters and scatters and i chat up the chatters and flatterers the chatters in my mind trying to find peace of mind and yet where ever i go my heart is where i ask and answer the question of where and where is where and where is my heart that is everywhere and nowhere and what does it matter what what matter wears and i wear out my self and myself out trying to be and to be the be of to be or not to be and well i think to myself what a wonderful world it could be if to be and not to be where where my heart is and where my heart is and where my heart is and where is my heart i wonder to and fro in a matter of fact way i say backwards and forwards … lost in the matter of matter and trying to find out what really matters and doesn’t matter and maybe somewhere in between the between and between the where and the nowhere and the matter of metaphors and the emperors new clothes is my heart and maybe my heart is wearing itself on its sleave inside out and outside in and when and where does it all begin and why is why my question does and doesn’t matter as tatters of thoughts that clatter and chatter for no matter what matter and no matter never seem to get to far from far and to far from near and too far from near and far and what more is there then sipping dreams through a straw at the bar except to find out where my heart is and where ever is is i think maybe i have gone to far or not far enough and then there is stuff the stuff of stuff and all the fluff of enough and not enough and the happy man knows when he has enough echos in my ear enough is enough enough of enough and where ever i go my heart and shadow that i know and don’t know follows me around in and not so merry go round and i ask my self what do i really know.. and i ask myself what do i really know and i ask myself what do you really know.. oh? the future is the hope of yesterday today hope imprisons or save us from the tyranny of the past hope a rope that hangs us or saves us from ourselves and what is past is past but hope holds fast as fast as fast can be as the last grasp of humanity hold fast thinking hope will save us from ourself at last looking up and down at the past of the past and the last last is heard the gasp of hope that imprisons us or save us from the tyranny that is more or less uncanny that we who are so full of hope hold onto the past as the past held onto the future and the past at the same time looking past the past what does one grasp but the tyranny of things past.. looking again i thought i saw what i did see but what i saw is a see saw of hope and tyranny but i saw what i saw do you see i ask in a gasp trying to grasp the passing of hope and the past into the past of the future and the future of the past for tyranny and yesterdays revolutionaries are tomorrow tyrants and today we hope for tomorrow and forget to live today and hope to live in hope tomorrow but hope not that tomorrow ever comes for when tomorrow comes it ends the tomorrow that is today and we are all out of time and out of rhyme and out of the past comes hope and the future but the future is neither today or yesterday or tomorrow the future is the hope of yesterday today the future is the hope of yesterday today hope imprisons or save us from the tyranny of the past hope a rope that hangs us or saves us from ourselves and what is past is past but hope holds fast as fast as fast can be as the last grasp of humanity hold fast thinking hope will save us from ourself at last looking up and down at the past of the past and the last last is heard the gasp of hope that imprisons us or save us from the tyranny that is more or less uncanny that we who are so full of hope hold onto the past as the past held onto the future and the past at the same time looking past the past what does one grasp but the tyranny of things past.. looking again i thought i saw what i did see but what i saw is a see saw of hope and tyranny but i saw what i seesaw… do you see i ask in a gasp trying to grasp the passing of hope and the past into the past of the future and the future of the past for tyranny and yesterdays revolutionaries are tomorrow tyrants and today we hope for tomorrow and forget to live today and hope to live in hope tomorrow but hope not that tomorrow ever comes for when tomorrow comes it ends the tomorrow that is today and we are all out of time and out of rhyme and out of the past comes hope and the future but the future is neither today or yesterday or tomorrow the future is the hope of yesterday today facing mortality looking inside you/me in the mirror that mirrors life i face the faceless face of mortality past, present and future beyond space and time i dance on the wings of dreams avoiding the unavoidable walking the tight rope of hope wishing for what we all wish for and wish not for beyond moments beyond thought beyond me beyond beyond i ask myself what does it all mean and why do we miss out on our dream what is it all about this life this death this feeling of emptiness where moments of life turn into just a thing like salmon going up stream or male bee in a dance to the end with the queen facing mortality i ask myself what is it all about and why and what and who is there i shout barking at the moon i resume the thought that consume out out damn spot a thought that blots out the sun as we go round and round and about our lives worshiping emptiness in the name of fun while believing that some make believe fairy tale will save us from ourselves while trying to sail out of myself through a storm in a windless gale oh life why art thou full of everything and nothing and everything in-between why oh why… i ask myself in you what is this that we dream who is this that i am and am not and everything in-between and why do we laugh and yet i hear the invisible scream and what does it all mean and what does it all mean trying to find the face of mortality in a dream What world will they inherit? headline Thursday May 11 2:03 PM ET India Population Tops a Billion Amid Introspection and me i wonder what kind of introspection and expectation and do we really introspect or just act circumspect and who and what is it that we actually respect are we so full of defect and neglect for neglect that we have lost our perspect and prospect on life and what does it mean as 1 billion people wake up every morning to a silent scream and me i dream i dream of lilies of the field and going on the river down stream and finding a quiet place with a little sun beam and what is and will by my/your/their hopes and aspirations will they be fulfilled and what about all those who are mentally and physically killed and what is the price of a life and who is billed birth of the milestone baby in a population explosion. swaddled baby was presented a chaotic crush as the world rush during rush hour and the roar and air planes soar over the roar and people and i ask you/my/us what for What world will you/my/us/they inherit? in between the spaces of my mind It is only with the heart that one can see lost between time and space and the emptiness between the spaces lost in a moment lost in time beyond dream beyond thought beyond reason and rhyme beyond being beyond hearing and seeing as i ride on the wing of the windless wind where resides all that is, was and will be lost in a dream waiting for you waiting for me… between the space of we It is only with the heart that one can see It is only with the heart that one can see time flies words dance on fire on a high wire putting words together between the spaces of my mind captured mirages empty spaces strange places infected with life special cases lines between line open eyes time flies between the spaces of my mind trying to find you-mans who are kind defying myself i sit here contemplating the everything of nothing and the nothing of everything and wonder about wonder and what will become of what will become as i dance between time and timelessness between wondering about this and that and tit for tat defying the laws of gravity and nature and reason and unreasonableness season as time runs into itself and i look around for some help and what goes up stays up and what is, is whatis whatever that is and me i defy defining and defying and lying
fighting with the wind

fighting with the wind encountering the past that rides on the winds of the mind in a sort of dream world between here and there and where ever where is… encountering the past as if riding on a dream wondering what history teaches us or maybe the wind listens and we are deaf for we seem to repeat the same soap operas the cut from the rally in munic back to the table needs some connections… the munich rally is not understood and could have more depth of understanding a missed opportunity he talks about a comrad who was killed but that another story thats the story for another time… that is the kind of human interest elements… not just the facts but the touching wonder that we are looking for the segue from the rally to dachau… just hangs there… flamenco or guitar music and something missing… we don’t know what happened to him at the end of the war and how he got to dachau.. lots of gaps… you may want to think about narrating michael… so far something is begging to be heard and tied together… so you can maybe try and tie it up with a narration might work question… what did your father know about the concentration camps before the war .. did he hear anything.. and what and how was the propaganda was during his stay in dachau … what form was it and what where the words … there is much detail around the above question which is very revealing… like before the end of the war what did people really know.. how well was the nazi propaganda machine at keeping such info out of the hands of people.. and when did he first hear about the concentration camps and what where his thought… did he believe it … etc facing the enevitable = standing up = the gate of heavenly peace = beginning of the future = escaping the future = trying to escape reality = representing the future = putting life on the line = what does it mean = shattered dreams = harder for the mind to recover than the stomach = avoiding trouble begets even more trouble = loss of credibility n search of vision, wisdom, can’t do justice = joked bake = with the heart = put into words = the deepest part of our being = fumbling = what do you think = personal crisis = the need in human life = ultimate belongingÿ temporary situation = in exile = the bottom line is belonging = implication = connection with reality = indifferent = strange promise = stretching back = not in good position = another reality = mysterious and powerful = what do you think is going onÿ different state of reality = saturated in the soul = metaphor = drenched life = in human history = convert = never get to the bottom of it = may never had known = mystery to myself = set back no end = think this through =ÿ not mouthing these thinks = effort to understand who i/we/you are = contrary to popular onion = corruption of our time = behaved to one another = evidence ambiguous = difficult for modern mind to comprehend = catalyst of change = encounter the mirror = death not last wordÿ rise above = joint venture = between you and mean = look into the heart = in the moment of choice = opt for the more courage or not = go in loveÿ world put aside = slipped away = restoration = sacrifice = poured into = life rising out of my soul = birth of a dream = wandered into history = in bondage = collective escape = what we forget = beleaguered = trickle way through history = don’t back off = what is the meaning of thisÿ never give up = what is there within us = looking for the thread of meaning = coexist = how are we to act = more muted = ever present = personal terms = calling to task = living conversation with our ancestors =ÿ moral desert = not forget = ridden by injustice = lived up to = deviate = ordeals = in place = just in passing = truths arrived at = break out the world at large = same thing said in different ways = conflict with selfÿ soul not contained = convergent = death part of the process = anything in common = death not an end = is this all =ÿ overheard = can’t make any sense = barely legible = death watch = feeling sorry for yourself = non negotiable = break through = fight backÿ random element = evolution integrates humanity = prospect of humanity = around the world =a sound heard around the world = project = thinking out loud = compressing ideas = infinite world = race between education and catastrophe = time running outÿ predicament what we are in = dare to speak = stop nonsense = universe man = slipping into the universe = in good nature = road through rough water = too many question = outside of tradition =ÿ don’t belong to myself = nonessentials and near essentials = flood of ideas = set apart = outrage you = potentialities which are not explored = universal citizens = reinvent self = dreamers idea = in another dimensionÿ everything i can remember begins here = origin of ideas = not sure existed = lifted hearts = don’t let up = struggling against disorder = time and time again =ÿ ÿbeing separated = understand what i say = longs to go back = pulled from the source = sound of the whippoorwill = a universal language lifted out of oneself = leaves fewer traces = moving into myself = what can you say about that = defies words = entering into the shinning sea = entering into a dew drop = playing upon the deepest recesses eyes are at rest = hush little baby don’t you cry = everlasting = alone with you = together and apart = by whatsoever name = dealing with an illusion =ÿ incandescent = insulated from the sky = consumed into nothing = posing a challenge = bombarded with = more misunderstanding = at odd with images = at the core = the obstruction =ÿ ÿone and wonderful – i wonder = the more you see the more you see you are blind = bring the human race together = pouring self into = in the human soul = detonated = no view of the whole = ultimate destination = blossoming from difficulties = surmounted reflection of uncertainty = haven’t figured out = protect from feeling = ironic = not a matter of substance = problem of despair = running in place = no surprises =ÿ where are we headed = looking for direction = bewildering = escape clauses = reflection of uncertainty = unreasonable expectations = born too late = breaking the barrierÿ closed off and apart = tidal wave = overwhelmed with sensation = mysterious kingdom = come into the world screaming = staring into space = mental aloneness = strange fixationÿ emotion like a refrigerator = now two cases the same = not meaning full = just what happens in the brain = information taken in is distorted hearing things = over stimulated = sensation intense = mechanical hugs = person from another planet = construct world = images first language = emotional delight too complicated = impenetrable = enraged = sensory jumble = locked inside = witnessing what happens = into free fall = ever hear your own mind = reaching out = taking apart the world = may be beyond help passing on knowledge = waiting to develop = world of possibilities = faded scars = what is missing from your picture = one step at a time = hoodwinked the world = see myself in you = limits are boundaries of intelligence =ÿ facing extinction = revisiting the past = mirrored image of islands of my mind = sense of irony = breaking through isolation = invisible = shrouded = when the speechless speak the truth = barriers = parallels = struggling with ourselves = ÿ phantom of the man = embryo layer = buried long ago = a mirrored image = a voice stirring inside = what still = needs to be done = peering through = unimaginative = disorientation = trapped into a painting = lost mind = crutch = portrait in black = healing soul = seeing words grow = commuted to the future attention !!

ordering words

ordering words no excuses who are you under there unmentionable beneath me infiltrated the soul unspeakable words that go unspeakably around and around raise up ! in and out and spread your wings into and out of above and beyond high and low believe it in order and out of order dis-order believe it or not oh me oh my what have i done a glimpse slipping into space mind corroding out of order emptiness is painful ordering words around in the lost mine of real meaning administering a journey of hopes and despair fading into corrosive elements facing you/me without innocence thinking of nothing live bait (souls for sale here) never say never life full of promise and promises about to be sacrificial and sacrificed believe it or not fallen a part how to grow up call of the wild slap in the face wild times in evidence man of letters playing with symbols without imagination here to find myself the unseen panther without spots spot like echo of words leaping beyond myself haunted again and again imagine the unimaginable too pragmatic with one foot in a dream do you hear the call of the wild dreaming i am a fictional character a good question is this a movie ? are you/i/we imaginary heroes ? lost in the symmetry of different elements speaking with silence while flying too close to the sun (to myself) got mixed up in other peoples reality i/you/we have been murdered maybe full of meaning maybe not have we been murdered ? meaning/moaning explaining life away refusing to give up life not what you had in mind image speaking to me from the mirror inner wear mistaken identity driving your/my/our self saying good bye to a murdered dream is there no hope for the future of the future ? i ask you/myself birds understand while time flies renewed life renews suddenly felt surprisingly splendid for some reason at ease sky fallen unrecorded history giving birth to himself blood rising humanity falling walking to exile burdened burned into the mind bearing witness roar of humanity heard around the universe bearing cross of darkness speaking through the blood honoring the dead and undead all bound to destiny a destiny with death crushed eagles turned black from fear shoveling the mind a shadow of an invisible man appears ode to the common watershed of the lost and forgotten entangled in own image piercing the heart everything cries out to be heard weeping inside awaken and rise up come down from the heights of empty dreams contemplate wonder before it’s to late the wind that blows through us approaching mortality in defiance of death courage to be creative no better than my brothers fierce innocence poems to unite us blizzards unseen in the mind speaking the unspeakable for the unspoken spokesman for the dead and undead what passes for life wearing a mask mystifying common humanity how did this happen psychological warfare hostile words hostile territory unintentional accidents give you anger on the fault line of life what passes for life anybody home whispering into the heart of darkness vomiting up bitterness you take your home with you gambling with death save your life the idea of an idea devouring ourselves looking into the abyss what are you going to do hanging onto a poem in the sweet by and bye getting a piece of the action don’t take yourself too seriously heart bleeding with sorrow so be it taken back as if never been away being an immortal binding wounds perish the thought not excused from the future how to give vision question yourself facing the truth with a little wonder as i wander in and out of it thinking to myself what a wonderful world it could be and maybe one day we shall see died without identity limping through life bound up betrayed by memories betrayed by control betrayed by innocence vanishing into oblivion into a broken dream mourning an illusion a piece of myself black mailed by the mind, by the heart crucify itself fighting control blood running frightened as if wounded explosions of fear in a never ending scream standing at an empty cross isolate in despair at the mercy of existence war with the soul in a journey to the end of the mind on the brink of the impossible dare it all bogged down witness life don’t know the meaning of it all undivided hiding in my ear rearranging a phantom bird whispers in my ear goaded by time memories haunt like shadows of a ghost entering the loop of eternity a poetic metaphor betrayed by myself becoming a shadow on the wings of memory trying to escape obstacles of doubt invisible hand ghost of a thought in silence i listen to you trick of the eye of the mind tragic isolation of human beings coming from the beginning of time perception of the mysterious miss having a future when your dead poetry of suffering on the frontier of being trying to unmask the truth fighting for the future for the soul little shop of horrors past hope past the dream time to stop waiting throwing shadows at the wind remembering myself white heron of my dreams a bird of wonder what should i think should i not searching the unanswered waiting to give birth to an unborn idea bequest going through the fire of the mind into the valley of the shadows ambiguous just because it is tearing self apart my brother is me take what comes to be paint and not the painter to be paint and not the painter disappearing into a poem having to think is all i have left death and life are watching over us walking through oblivion post partum thought chasing desperation fighting walking through memories where words have no meaning man looking for his voice not meant to be seen not meant to be seen can’t imagine bitterness in your heart way out of no way get what you give embarrassment to our ancestors disappearing out of my mind excuse me haven’t learned yet what is wrong on the verge of extinction a head of myself t.s. elliot “mediocre poets borrow, great poets steal” a world that never was trying to justify misunderstanding like a cowboy who has been lassoed with his own words point of no return the future announcement is no more obscure person an anachronism to myself demi god intimate life couldn’t be contained ostentatious display a stolen kiss lost dreamwork starving can no longer be denied myopic rules without purpose fall short of the dream empty / smashed / repulsed died with hope remains to be seen growing misery i will never forget moving along hypocritical exchange bearing witness to you/me/us dark side of infinity before it’s to late life without you/me/us hiding in my skin stolen life betrayed who’s the judge who judges who never got over it why don’t you fight for awhile heard but not listened whose skin do you live in more in your own mind secret like a black hole waiting plight of denial shadow of life hold fast to the light in the mirror there is the question where have i/you/we been burden of history unrealistic / unexpected working through guilt imposing morality imposing morality under thumbs a piece of myself fallen victim treason of the soul inconceivable passed away prolonged betrayal what ought to be said not just form selling words images of blood sweat dreams dead man talking to himself passed away logic is not logical writer with out words painting with the mind gone awry shut out locked out logic is not logical ghastly illusions ghastly illusions persecuting the mind sad truth pulled skin off while still alive too much hopelessness too much destroying the heart desperately dancing through the mind people of conscious where are you ? echo bouncing off the walls of my mind consoled with self deception face the truth fighting against myself caught in the midst cast off talking to where you/i/we live can your hear yourself/myself listening to angels rhapsody outside this moment take back your life never have and never will we/you/i don’t exist lost sight making the piano dream growing up makes you shy i miss my grandfather coming alive disappearing changes form what is there to say search for tomorrow no substance breathless listen afraid of being escaping eyes of innocence confessions urgent honesty colored perception peel away the layers victim of own success pondering the essence through the back door eyes of innocence cast adrift weightless floating through the sky escaping gravity catching a dream defying and denying flesh and blood taken with myself sense of belonging questioning myself into a different sky ingredients seeding ideas looking for courage stunned questioning myself it’s all relative into a different skin here and there no future no past no present just here and there and everywhere so there squeezing the soul bumping into myself transcending time abstract existence relinquishing myself squeezing my soul unknown soldier unknown soldier arbitrary dementia time and motive coincide chained to silence in misery meaning to life something eluding shivering in a body that is like a stranger tied to you to me black mailed by the mind weeping inside out longing betrayed creeping thoughts something eluding poets post mortem endangered species imprisoned with profoundness deceitful and revealing secretive pedantic coward ignorant mysterious annoying freeing and loathing crude awakening glimmers of hope permeating the soul in a land beyond dreams endangered species getting down to the bottom of it what was that first and last contradiction truth in all of us not getting it longing for something what really matters silence is misunderstood life of consequence life with consequence key to the interior sacrificing intimacy let’s imagine stepping on emptiness real and raw surrounded impersonal free suspicion haunted heart eye for eye frozen in time lost world stolen innocence defies imagination the wreckage of time blur of the mind sweeping the world hidden writings flying words untold sorrow ask why defies imagination dare to listen fiasco manipulating words no answers for tomorrow stranger than fiction not always what it seems the defeat of humanity running for my life symbol of wildness of the night protection stillness quietness sharp eyes a riot of thoughts waves splashing over camouflaged fallen from grace disappearance of myself/yourself/ourselves cessation memories lingering sense of what might have been no one knows for sure ghostly companion roaming free in the imagination piercing echo running with lies way of life vanishes before very eyes raging against self corruption where is the point of no return where the end begins trying to erase the vacancy piercing the heart nothing is sacred collapsed illusion almost a charade beyond the pale delivering a symbol trying to be somebody finding them/our selves been irrelevant no longer of any importance where to go from here conspiratorial mindset more than what you think inhabited by the mind too many disillusionments hard to say no substance lost faith the guilt of innocence doesn’t add up existential edge so many memories annoying being a servant thinking the worst time stands still in the realm of dreams running away/towards coming to be the end of me who knows what might be between inspiration and madness brokenness stolen heart breaths poetry without face relationship of attitudes fear trusts nothing except for fear vacancy from humanity open mind unbecoming in my mind ******************************************************************************* waiting for the future reality behind reality to live in poetry tears revealed dormant image a squatter in civilized society losing part of the soul falling into darkness shadow boxing with my soul forgive the future whom we have never seen forgotten distance nothing to lose known grief never actually lived who knows what we have endured giving a chance condemned to being himself no place in this world meaning of life the mirror in the mirror mining the truth hiding invisible man out of myself upset at being a live no bigger than nothing consequences of life learning to hate in collision with my/you/our selves nothing is nothing tomb in the waste land of the mind forlorn hope feeling deeply witness to the world hard tasked attack on humanity unknown to each other justified myths cage of the soul act of torture rape of the soul brutality of innocence confronting the future future out of control lifeless stereotypes don’t see nothing scaring one another running on empty going down the drain giving up the dream can’t go on knitting fear conflict final blow a soulful cry rise up heart of a slave past rooted in pain dressed up in self pity wearing a badge complex denying everywhere there is music delayed reaction can’t take it no more not willing to listen voice inside listen to the sound of you/i/we extraneous noises inside sound becomes alive clear the mind layers of thought mindless meandering voluntary deafness don’t want to hear it time to take care gift of ourselves remain quiet open up space in the mind slowly expand contract expand contract breathe deep feel vulnerable go deep deeper sound of the soul encompassed reveals more than we say exposes more than we know twinges of anxiety mouth dry legs trembling walking into oblivion unprepared to hear for whatever reason in any case breaking boundaries delayed reaction detracted from not with standing the voice inside gentle unearthed persistence to undermine a dimension beyond the ordinary invented in the belly lost voices the buffalo chasing the wind of the past disappearing into myself i never came back but you said you really meant it banter and babble particular situation in which we find ourselves to a certain degree the sound of your inner voice but you said repository of the soul thoughts tipped subject changing pay attention listen what is going on behind the words effort to focus echo of ourselves periphery of the mind no wonder lost to a memory quiet please stifling the mind absorbed pathological state overwhelmed distracted subject to change fixed idea becoming aware slave of erasure what’s in it never seems to plodding evolution occurred to me couldn’t take anymore gushing out of me in little ways back to real world pack what you can carry mind in grip survivor of guilt clean up all the mistakes fabricating a dream you could never believe inspired to think nobody leaves this place the same peering behind who’s in charge breaking down concealing the truth daily bread false fabrication marching towards the grave stagnation concealing the truth kept in the dark difficult to distinguish protecting your soul resisting resistance world of darkness pushing way out of this world lost sense of humor on fire out of it revolution under nose great contempt wrestling with dilemma trying to find the way excuses groping take the lid off back to the drawing board beginning of sleeplessness strange as it may be over looked trapped silent witness from beyond the grave duped deluded by dreams love that is not open silently expecting forgot myself terrible memory tree without a shadow answer inescapable and inexcusable existence has no nothing need more courage losing life absurdity aren’t really there what’s passed the future of the passed whatever it takes hard to ignore the pain of the soul unlived illuminating insight-ful seldom witnessed no special entrance transition learn to sing unfinished business melancholy little planet no need for the truth or poets again what is it inside the struggle you want to believe how absurd relevant irreverent reconstituting life fear of appeasement risk of inaction maybe too trivial personification debating the future pull up the draw bridge rigid ideas learn from disasters out of the darkness hard to accept soul dried up sucked into relieve suffering policy of despair i suspect strong ingredients remarkably unremarkable reservations final judgment over heard saving grace on your mind speak to me running amok look em up wiped out defending your/my/ourselves what does it mean not understood limitations misconception what is your problem deteriorating aloof not debatable other side heroes are dead holding onto images narrow minded at large fleeing into a mirage side by side juxtaposition illimitable dream walking emanating unconsciously conscious called life mergers perceptual invisible front of the unseen fused coming together becoming one with reprieve eye and I caught for time immemorial living with hypocrisy unraveling the mystery intensely intimate swallowed by oblivion sleepless in seatle resonates to very core silently within looked death in the eye cycle of blame accepting ambiguity perceiving free your soul grab hold undress to be liberated not a spectator becoming a protagonists union of subject and object throwing thoughts off some of you in there nothing serious better have that looked at judging you judging me sad and lonely standing in your shoes talking to you tell you the truth i am starting to get on my own nerves mirrors facing each other treat like a real person letting go when you want to hold on got nothing to say shooting star now who am i going to be what’s next for us not necessarily doesn’t have to be give yourself some time buried alive vultures picking the future apart cut through out unconditional money back guarantee second hand the mechanism of normality squirm liberate e.e. cummings “civilized world must be destroyed the world of analytical thinking that keeps us a spectators – outside” erase distance feeling dominated prostituting the dream seems nonsensical to the mind is possible in dreams not a description but a feeling true to form a part of history buried alive wearing down pain of emptiness con artist looking back stranger in a strange land low tolerance soon to be delivered subway submission make something catching hell taught to hate power of words say what you are thinking ready or not see for yourself ascending descending descendant defendant never go back a silent mass life is a lesson full of fire in occupied territory street preacher enter into the house of oppression oppressed power to move words desire of love tell it like it is immaculate conception a silent service holy spirits wanted group therapy into the mouth of the lion warrior a big mystery gripped like a curse who knows where we are who knows who we are looking back to the beginning search never ending what means everything glimpse of the world are you afraid strength to overcome holding spirits all of this points to back on the trail the holy grail beyond the farthest captured fantasy in the shadows rhythm of the sun without laughter without thought optical illusions be my guest world is a dangerous place existence is a burden stirred up the fire i give you my head paralyzed reprisals of the mind killing fear center collapses threat to mankind and herkind more in common sur-vive under-life dark warrior lives in all of us a human ornament a human outcast smoldering in the misery about to invade the soul planning the apocalypse of my mind haunting dreams stolen kiss invader remember brooding over lost innocence collaboration in calamity unknown destruction of destiny dark hallway without purpose surgeon of sorrow heart broken lost what is and what is not uncertain treasure tryptic of life empty frames empty frames cut in stone beacon of hope human vision enduring endearing strength to survive timeless remember this moment not trying can’t believe this mess forget it ever happened in your face bad attitude wild and unpredictable drawn to the inconceivable the voice of your conscious mourning for life a test of personal integrity part of the circus tangled web of history retreat from life somebody stole your/my/our mind/heart/soul the sun also rises slayer of personal morality melancholy remembered metaphorically speaking dichotomy thinking, feeling separated at birth at odds unity no accidents today, please implications feel first think later vision child is a primitive race sense of timelessness cease to be a spectator in life be a verb not a noun e.e.commings depicting itself witness to the moment you/i/we are an absurdity there i said it moving a verb fusion pay attention dimension far beyond splitting atoms pure and simple dreaming and waking subject of an object lost illusion in the beginning it began it would never end perpetual illusion life love dream life without dreams before the big bang never again resonating far beyond any concept inner digestion internal immanent presence surrender revealing time stops unobtrusive sent from the silence return to silence called forth carried on the waves taking part in a dream cries of consciousness awkward time do you have a secret where have you been to be true a tragedy sword has the word, word in it relic of the soul denying consciousness cleansing fire do you have something to hide true self a great deal of tension getting complicated can’t possibly be denying fear no thank you, i’m off uphold the unbelievable fell into that don’t you where the roses grow wild dangling participle picking my/your/our mind walk a country mile when jeopardy of honesty good things out of bounds get real who we are actually foolish pride a crying shame on the fence a narrow edge in any event it’s apparent keep the change started in childhood stage of life skeptical question character second thought larger than life drawing the line can’t do no right near future underestimated in the context pull out of it under pressure part of history anger in the soul larger than life tough times rough passage baptized by fear worth noting serious passed it on taking on age a new generation endangered species killing innocence hidden voices disingenuous ignorant hate dried up wounded spirit a state of being what happened short lived remaking life disappearance of the phenomenon fail to identify character in a novel trust somebody beyond capacity reaching out sense of nonsense learn from your kids growing up from the bottom up connected art moves atoms behind the times beyond comprehension invasion of privacy new way of thinking in a parade all by your/my/ourselves think differently catch as catch can relatively ineffectual independent of time down to bone marrow lift off there she goes pushing up hill life or no life that is the question sorry to interrupt veneer of civilization can’t believe it throw away the mold transform inspiration not imitation follow thought who else could it be future at risk hello this is a wake up call lacking courage can’t believe this is happening what is happening come on in sorry to interrupt off to a non start common ground act now move over not a solution worried over optimistic curiosity do you believe who are you now back to our program abandoning the future what is past is passed there are no ropes lost in the darkness of the mind any one there i wonder what you/i/we look like bereaved self inflicted accident called life midway through a moonless night prowling the mind hardly believe it floating away afraid to put thoughts into words survivor marooned on an island in my mind stranger than fiction acting to an unseen audience who would it be what do you think can’t explain it who knows what a day may bring good night irene i’ll see you in my dreams recovered memory diminished capacity homeless in the body something to think about inner most secret immobile as stone stalking myself muted life unwritten history wall of memory who knows what’s what gone mad forget the future shoulder to shoulder they marched marching into the future only to wind up in the past threat to ourselves damages us all heart filled with…. reckoning in a winter wonder land lights dimmed paintings that breathe communal illness try this no tomorrow entering into an eternal paradox a fine line in my solitude misconceived – banished from eternity verse and chapter eye perched on the edge of time shadows of my mind eye witness fight for life heart to heart in the twilight zone crimes against ourselves suffocating dead man calls for justice fell in love with love searching the soul get relief in a dark tunnel in a black hole don’t feel anything devious and dubious manipulate or abandon a soap opera that lives in the eye of the beholder something like that confronted with a nightmare the past runs rampant in my dreams yesterday becomes today tomorrow what will be will be what about me into to a tunnel within the mind where light has no light where darkness meets itself scared to imagine ghost of myself in a black mirror morning the death of my soul flamenco cruel absurdity happiness fleeting sorrow can sing catharsis place where purity vanishes core of sadness breathing life into words rooted in the earth a voice from deep shadows turning inside out refusing to hide singing life away voice becomes a stream of blood unadulterated behind the mask of beauty tragic caught in suffering intoxicated misery last for a life time under a spell suffering of all beings a shadow on the wall no longer who i was deep in the heart futility rising emerging from the lamentable appears very real only valid in hind sight waking up after the dream looking back manufactured in the brain ambiguous the magic is inside becomes the world converting myself lonely existence go beyond relevant to what constructing different realities what happens elegant building walls losing sight coming out alone who follows me making dust rise knows no shame mask this is not all self image insightful harboring thoughts malnourished dream on wouldn’t even think about can’t hide forever don’t need forever compressed words mystery of life is to life giving birth to myself hunger thirst for something more not complete infinity of expressions eagerness transient seeker within moving in a dance rushing by piercing the veil picking up a little bit of dust dust of laughter past recognizing mortality death stalking you/me/us no longer need approval fearful of solitude loneliness is full of fear entering domain of the unknown emerge escaping boundaries of time and space new texture in love with loving discover solitude sings softly sight lost life taking its leave in silence end of moment barrier by the light of death things that we longed for in pain glimpsing the soul insight into unconsciousness beginning to find my eyes looking for the looker inside and what if you dreamed and woke up in the dream what if what if drawn in by pass indispensable source driven does the majority really rule resonating with you orchestrating molecules extended beyond myself not well defined not aware of it self fulfilling prophecy doubting doubt blind sighted circumstance synchronicity seeking the seeker so to speak beginning to merge not over shadowed witness anybody listening listening to the listener pay attention always with you/me/us carrying eternity carrying infinity timeless giving birth to consciousness in this world but not of it now here and now there coincidence recognizing you/me/us magnetized things events circumstance presence state of being ideas in the mind mortality resonating start journey with empty hands death wedding with eternity have no fear voyage is done crossing the threshold of life in the forest at midnight no stranger to myself taken in the arms parting words caught sight thrilled with touch and this too is not the end there is yet more giving birth to myself merging with everything no distinction between the seer and scenery gone beyond myself caught in the logical out of ignorance knowing where we started from for the first time passing beyond plunging into oneself becoming the becomer mirror being that which is is also me giving rise new way of seeing chosen to take care of up to the responsibility embarking on a journey the same in different disguises merging with myself not about words it’s about feelings what have we/you/i become not just a memory concentrate on breathing learn to take time give a break look forward to are there any question how you think and how you feel not fool proof recurrence less frequently reaching to the sky going on continuously in the first place delicate relationship interconnected set self up to the extent make a big difference all you want to be broken picture out of childhood damaged beginning life in exile out of touch tied up came out of a dream assault of senses layers of violence witness at a broken dream act of defiances art echo born out of desperation flashes of myself rejoining what has been stolen all or nothing history of keeping time reluctant warrior do your duty no redemption my heart cries out invaded my soul end of endlessness laid to rest irredeemable there is someone inside not outside go back to where never been before searching for origins revising history behind sight in hind sight where would we be projecting horror hiding in plain sight no human eyes have ever seen before straying thoughts separated from myself look and look again denying the obvious mutiny never thought it would happen to me place in the universe give me room like a ghost in the silence swallowed up a one man band hiding in place a marionette echo from our ancestors “i don’t want them to get into my sack and steal my ideas”, homeless person on street the wreckage of time blur of the mind trapped in time sweeping the world hidden writing flying words out of time running around in circles disposable the price you pay escaping destiny victim moving parts and a part where is justice no end to impasse what you’re going to miss after you’ve died the truth is there is no truth no escape in the womb of time dichotomy paradoxical logic opposing forces attempting to unite images are born secondary thought fuse interrelating formula of nature discover the secrets waiting just beyond the womb of time cowboy surrealist becoming an outlaw captured language shooting out street lights marriage of image and word no longer locate truth roots of obsession private press avenging angels scourge of entropy insofar disparate elements converging conspired against survival philosophical rebel language as sculpture insulted by a culture of sameness – stultifying dangerous emanations words driven into the page antecedents circuitous renegade literary cowboy seeking the unexpected starve yourself from yourself you are your own coffin your voice echoiing off your mind go within ambiguities basement of the soul sacred and the dark night of the soul forbidden lust coexistance of opposit values secret passages of the mind aspects of unfolding seemingly meta-biological evolution descovering itself journey towards the center survival of the fittest evolution of conscious victims in response legacy of war need to wake up escape circumstances free as the wind free as the dust in this world but not of it in search of trust who are we moving line in the sand not about to quit status quo turning on each other forward look outward looking a bit mystifying none whatsoever no indication losing you revolution fall flat in it to the end problem child the meaning of it all components full of innocence embodiment curiousity sense of wonder peace of the timeless innocence really never dies from the womb of creation awakening innocence walked in the way poetry a raid on the inarticulate (t.s.elliot) half crying half laughing hidden in my heart made and unmade deathless spirit a fragrance of a dream with the morning light floating down stranded in my heart what magic has moved my being falling innocence innocense never lost seperation from me and you self pity time is born sacrificed for the image continuity of memories eternal reference looking within self image not real self caught up in it prison of the self lonely esistance building wall around losing sight dark shadow born coming out alone from the silent dark escaping not knows no shame not just now you and me if not now when relevant constructing different realities what happens when eye witness going all the way intoxicated the skunk into the tent living off the land one last look self conscious idol of self letting go of control compressed into words sword of the pen facet of self not complete roles we play no longer bring insight somewhere calling card from the past escaping boundaries thief in the night of the mind = something out there to find = guarding the memory = suffering make us more us = commonality = understand i am because you are = essence of being = human being = nobility = human kind = it’s whatever it isn’t = changes over time = evolves = more sophisticated = sane thought = referential = transparent = captured imagination = shut my mouth not founded on honesty = hear what want hear = told what want to be told = war is good for politics = politics is good for war = forgot to forget = problem with problems = problem with people is the people with problems = politics betrays itself/trust/innocence = where are we/you/me = don’t look now prophet of profit = god of gods = savior of saviors = the person who has the most things when they die wins this T-shirt getting into agony = agonizing over agony = transparent = whatever come to mind = no wonder it’s a mystery = catching life accidentally = never predicted this madly curious = peek into the future = thought = imagination wide open = on the verge = link to the future = don’t know what’s going to find = echos of the past = do you read me = caching up to the past = living proof = leaps and bounds = hope survives in spite of you/me/us = freedom fro life’s torments = in narrow limits of our ability = what comes after = to the brink = looking into the abyss = = will to survive life = excuse me for my existence = embarrassing our/you/my ancestors = will to live is same as will to create = mystery of life = makes no sense assert a right that is not necessarily = may fall into the wrong hands = transparency = where hope extends = sperm and egg is where it all starts = predisposed to = no compunction = in the fullness of time = need to be able to deliver = threshold walking wounded = anybody here = traumatized by life = don’t have time to concentrate = open ended = difficult times = secret languages = what is the truth here what is or what you/i/we believe = world of atrocity = systematic destroyed = forgot to be human = the dead think they are through with their suffering = will to resist = dying/living with dignity = giving wings to humanity = survival and act of resistance = to live to die for something/nothing = names of the dead have been forgotten as if they did not live = unremitting terror = where does the strength to survive come from = begin to crumble = searching for meaning = still questioning = uncovering life = armed with truth = armed with violence = armed with deceit = draconian = inflicting pain/freedom = obsessed with punishment right/wrong = “one who seeks revenge better dig two graves” = seriously duped by the truth/lies owning up to being man/woman = need a reality check = looking for excuses = in search of blame = make a life = fighting for life = comprehend the meaning feeling obsolete = blood boiling = bitter in hell = abandoned = savage abuse = repetitive = manipulated = victimized by the mind = hostility = leaking from my/you/our pores = beating the back wall of the mind in frustration taking life away = scared to death = somehow life is saved from ourselves = senseless wretched misery = pattern of brutality = last resort for incorrigible = expected to explode last resort = on the edge of humanity = inflicted by psychological harm = mental health = society is us/you/me captive of ideas = captive of time = not barbaric = drawing a direct line = todays cynic = driven into = war destroy illusion = time capsule of = turned something loose = lost control = prisoner of history can’t remain enemies = emotional hangover = missing in action = learned lesson = learn = only see our own losses = shaping perception = hanging on every word = what goes into it = going inside as illusions drop by the waysides = abandoned in the mind = nothing captures the moment the mood the pain = nothing we/you/i can do about it fencing with the mind = over plotted = anxiety when planing = thinking something should always be happening = lack of faith in = what do you/i/we say = grew out of idea = defused = out of nowhere = trying to get as far as could = wrenching image = seared into the mind = how can anybody survive = on the scene = horrified = shielded from seeing = could never imagined = awkward = sandbagged = hidden agenda = hard to make living = axe to ground = fading with the light = buried alive = covered with rubble = heartless = in the palm of your hand = how to get at the issue = how to get ourselves together = society of loaners = forces feeding anger = loner view = the question of underlying tension = risen up against hate = common grief = rising up against = not getting to you/me/us = not touching implicated = without insolation against life = in any what whatsoever = outraged by arrogance of terror = under an occupied mind = putting a wedge = beyond the pale = seething with hate = mythology of hate = where have we been = written out of the agenda = not count = talking in generalities = courting rage = threatened by the dream = expansion = intrusiveness = restriction = unprecedented decline = traumas = loss of confidence = dialogue = running against trust = consequence = no evidence on other side = response to explosion real problem of trust = covered up = account of = pay more attention = public ignorance = think we/you/i are going to live forever = plagued by self abuse = deeply troubled = staggering from overload = sentencing = more and more are ending up here frustrating and anger = behavior has consequences = perception = sanctions = morally accountable = threat to western civilization = dysfunctional mind/heart/soul = what happens after = not have same sense of consequence = living minute to minute and drama to drama = solving problems by locking up the future/soul/innocence = i pledge allegiance = overwhelmed = affiliated with the human gang = hard place to be breaking cycle = attitudes and behavior = could do anything because you /i/we don’t feel = teaching right from wrong = how do you/i/we feel = change is possible = looking for avenues = learning to care how to live with yourself = forget this = think about = can’t live with self = warrior of habits = troubled = bad dream = great comfort can’t begin to understand = couldn’t see it = find way to survive = here before memory = not that simple = profound moment =one must share love for there to be love squeezing the last drop of life = tearing life apart = asunder = over = making it too beautiful = time stood still = this is fiction = credibility on the line =too old to change = around in circles = into the realm of dreams = running away/towards = these comments will be the end of me = language is rich = i/you/we are poor = speak for yourself = who knows what might be = thinking the worst = annoying = believe in secrets = pensive sadness smell = take a deep breathe of life = imagine not breathing = imagine not living = just imagine everything and nothing = see history of keeping time = incense keeping the moment = water clocks click clock = drawing with water and time = burning the pattern of timelessness = trails in the sky = lost time = found time WHAT LIES AHEAD = what can be done = is it clear = concessions = the fantasy not afraid = given up = what do you/i/we see = nothing other than plodding along = what will the effect be = basic problem = stitching back together = phony issue = in violation of = why not = doesn’t seem to mean anything = whats your vies = real strategy = come to far to wash hands = making an impact = uproot that = strong moral case = obligation to do something = tool to open door = not a matter of time limit = what’s going on = wrongs wronged excluded = unsettling = better than all the other options = worst of worst choices = not there yet = chronicled = life of the edge worry about time = understand perception = = excluded = need to be brought inside = recognizing history and want to do something about it = death toll still rising = soul searching = mirage = the way it should be = deeper = the new you/me/us = upset about your/my/our in soul = everybody is afraid of something = that’s how we know we care afraid of not feeling = do you mind = not over = life is dangerous = but one must have courage to live to feel = not your/my/our fault who protects the soul = rise to the challenge = who protects the future = any confusion = all come down to this brought to you by = never said a word = planted suspicion = hysterical over reaction = commonality with life = beyond mortality = where do i/you/we stand = what does this entail = find this out = want to know where you/i/we stand = crisis of life = being set up = contradiction = sentimental view of life = scene as offensive = how do you come out of it = unfolding in = got over it the way we all do = patching together life = the next legs = transparency of everything = learn anew = picking up lie on a new journey = childish promises of forever and ever = coming to terms with life = next hurdle = lies in exaggeration = recognizing the subject = chosen by the moment = mangled souls = unlikelihood = never gave any thought = taking more and more out of you/me/us = no it isn’t anything never give up = in the end = very few = night mare legacy for all mankind = the kaiser Wilhelm announces i shall lead you into wonder world war one = moral fiber sacked = moral fiber = dire meaning = wretched and discontent at it’s worst = sworn to do or die = book of doom = ultimate triumph = menace of = era of propaganda = avalanche of words = everybody loves uniforms = Hitler promised a cure for all ills = people in their wretched = held suspect = life sometimes is a mocker = promises of chains of slavery = untouched by = never before in the history = strange alliance = task of cleaning up seen nothing heard nothing = standing alone = face to face with myself = all absorbing = imposed on ever one = human mind in quarantine = crime of listening = heart breaking = \ mourning the past = turned upside down = how much is too much = second guessing = agonizing choice = gone back in time = help stop it before it forms in a world where nothing is real = enough is enough = what does your/my/our conscious to do = duty as a citizen of what = local, state, nation or humanity rips life apart = tender = sensual = vibrant = ever wish you could go back in time = believe your eyes = let imagination come to life = little inclination to do so = eradicated western society = almost = ideas do have consequences = coddled = feathery hints = great reluctance = increasingly desperate = evaporating pools = self examination = sunk to an all time low discern and decipher = getting out of hand = don’t think that is the issue = demonizing the few = this far away = crossed the line came back to haunt you/me/us = not an isolated example = disturbing transformation = what’s it all about = want to reconsider = brain dead = questionable what is strong morality = conspiracy talk = what do we/i/you/me want = depending on what you want astounding set of coincidences = just who are you/we/me = not answering the obvious = frustrated by false leads = conspiracy or coincidence = not seen again = seems to overlap prisoner of war = partially completed puzzle = what is it to be not a person = tell everybody you know = felt set up by the past = on instincts = doesn’t pass smell test = must mean something = where does all this stand = have not given up = not finished by long shot = not at all clear what you/i/we have at war in own mind = getting any sense = fall out = hostile culture = neither here nor there = too terrible to describe = an addiction = only goes so far in a meaningful way = indispensable link = variable factors = anecdotal evidence = confronted with the mirror = compounded problem = with anonymity = endure for edges to come = painful consequences = root causes = closing eyes to evidence = logical fallacy = used as a metaphor = no excuse vagueness = not even close = fighting off a lot = road to hell is built on good intentions = seems to be fading = prime suspects = piecing the story together drifting from one mirage to another = question needs to be asked = still promising = holes in the story = all speculation alleged actors = profile = casting a broad net = false imprisonment = it can happen to you/me/us = bouncing off the walls of your/my mind = as if it is about somebody ease = not a whole lot for a life = swallowed up by oblivion felt like forever = caught myself inside/out = departure from the future = slow death = slow life = cradled in the arms of the future = departed in ashes = from ashes to ashes and dust to dust = so split instant = unforeseen and unknown = time stopped = waiting for the rest of your/my/our life = mind/heart in a struggle to survive = sadness evaporated forgotten innocence = compelled to speak = speaking on paper = inappropriate use of words = hungry = got lost in a fantasy = unmeasurable = unknown = unthinkable truth = banned = wretched = aching = signs of suppression = vengefulness destroys the one who feels it = locked up in a prison of the mind = worried to the core = didn’t know each other = kafkaesque = dantesque = horror of visions = wrongful silence = worst nightmare = is it true that truth can set you/me free = forgotten innocence cynicism and hell whole = why is this significant = chain of command = primary objective = crime of omission = hammering away at life = just imagine into a heap of rubble = you didn’t hear it from me = a new look = mystique = all things considered = doesn’t make any sense = is this supposed to mean something = bearing witness = subtle = so look closely = the news is not good = give it away and see what comes back = relationship = venerable history = driving in circles = can’t complain = want what want = why = if you/i/we/ don’t who will = not only one with a theory = so instructed = all in it together the way we all have be and will always be couldn’t agree more = it pays to discover = can’t you see = and guess what = it could be you/me/us = not necessarily prone to = trying to disarm = draconian = creating fear with fear = infringing = advocate = reasonable doubt = receipt for disaster/hate = alarming = infiltration = rhetoric in the air = might do something = phantom enemies = gone to far = far step dissension = different views = hard look = bringing to focus = confidence is more than half the game = who dreams the dream = taking the dream as far as it can take you lesson of life = visualize dreams = struggling with it = you/i/we become the dream = looking back at time = when is it right = experience life all alone = what lead to this ignore or dismissed = backlash = didn’t seem to contradict = a no choice choice = ends without hope = even optimistic = glass ceiling = what does that say = what is the presumption = residence of silence = form can move out of = what is on the horizon = potentially compelling = lost voice in part = recognition of voice = black cloud = something in the air = almost over = asked myself/yourself that question thousand times given enough time = no way = have to go in a lot of different directions = = what will it mean = who gets what = you can tell = rebirth of civilization songs that were never sung = set mind to rest = don’t know what you/i/we are doing = into a living hell = no matter what you think = in an artificial position = rising to the challenge = misunderstood = sense of helplessness = hyphenated = didn’t exist = take seriously = subconscious = empty purses = back and forth and up and down = reflection of who you/i/we are = doesn’t exist = created by fantasy = something denied = passed through life = bring you up to now = ambivalent = trying to immersed from the unconscious = back into self = shattering values = back into nature = lost identity = comes in stages = confrontation inside = nothing is sacred = teamed or sauteed sense of nonsense = find themselves = lost faith = follow your instincts = it’s in your mind = the future is coming = born irrelevant = faith in you = no longer of any importance = collapsed illusion = where to go from here = conspiratorial mindset = beyond the pale = almost a charade = inhabiting your character = mind = body = to much disillusionment = hard to say = trying to be somebody = delivering a symbol toilet trained = love power control = not accurate picture = no reason at the money = shared fantasies = money is very private = don’t know where to go = controlled by money = acquisition stirs up guilt = unable to enjoy = believe in rainy days = most waking hours worrying not over involved = diminished = profile = greed and fear = form personalities = learned to overcome = if you don’t know who you are be prepared to pay with your life = made possible by management gone beyond = and then = nothing like time = artist in exile = eye from the mist of the mind = peering into the future for hunger you would do anything possible = a smudge in the mind of the future = pain that won’t go away = deception = chain of command = all hell broke lease = heart to weak the loneliness of a long hall way at the end of a mirror = passing of time a life moves through itself into another dimension as tears roll down towards the beginning of time taking to the sadness inside = a man walks into himself = taste it = suspicious = question to the validity = looked to be false = refused to pay = never even told about it = couldn’t believe it = sealed case = might be liberating = a baby burp = be prepared = pick up sticks = can’t touch it = black birds singing in the dead of night = at the mercy of the mind not enough information of where we come from = complacency = not a lot of vulnerability = defeated capabilities = receipt for disaster = larger lesson to learn here where do we stand = know more than we say = trial by fire = hijacking the future = compelling = circumstance = head of game = independent mind = consequences of laying down the law = seeking a voice right in the middle = can’t fight/find the words = self perception = getting hooked into = swimming = touches a nerve = not going face it = don’t want to think = earlier than you think = this way out think i would = consequences of life = lack of faith = day in day out = fair to say = dialogue on conspicuousness = over sized head = world of secrets = beneath the water = under the hood = fouled own nest = matter of perception exists in the imagination = spread in the wind = improve memory = complacent = incomprehensible = inequities = dialogue on an open road to nowhere = imagine that = the wreckage of time = blur of the mind = sweeping the world = hidden writings = hidden in time flying words = a loft in the minds eye = beyond in a relationship with each other = forgotten about the future = looking for authenticity = on the margin = embracing life = captured the inexplicable = seed of the dream lash to the mast = voice of experience = true believer = moment of truth = opportunities = rethinking ideas in the eyes of a child = where were you then = before my time good government is not good = politics = rethink about = on the firing line = none of us knows = redefining = taken for granted = begin to doubt = looking at the world through the eyes of you/me/us = something to pass on to = get intrigued = more to be said = how to work it out = easier to say than to do = courage of convictions = often wondered = courage of convictions = refused to be = worst that would have happened = what willing to die for = part of the generation = random wheel = life in evolution = frightening notion = take note = note worthy = historical denial = said at the time = terrifying = in context = are you willing to live/die = what do you see in that picture struck by anger = symbolic = crises reached = built anger = shift in rhetoric = way of feeling alive = self inflicted what see in your/my/our eyes = poems from the end of time = fixated on negativity = social discourse = problems faced = going nowhere = important to communicate hope = close my mouth/words = to conclude my words = words to your heart = from generation to generation = your time is limited = where no one lives = eating your words = fresh foot prints in the mind of the guilty = what do you say = what’s the difference = what do we learn = age old lesson = perseverance in persevering = the message = tomorrow will be better than today = what i am trying to say = recognition for the road = haunted by farsightedness = long thought = makes good sense = time to get real = clearly saying = prescription for = side affects = losing weight = just don’t know = how do you see the future great eternal mount = sucking up expectations = self serving = seems to be in trouble = losing faith = creating expectations = more complicated = a symbol = only the nightmares remain = never be the same = shattered dreams = compelled by grief = no limit to pain crescendo = results are remembered/forgotten = how does the oboe breath = what do you want to hear = to be brave for the next entry = alive = elusive = suspense = relentless = the beginning before the beginning = meeting of elements = following voices = singing through the freedom of the wind = searching for ways to reach the unreachable = beyond a home coming = eruption = spilled over into = giving of one self = creating a palace of dreams = couldn’t hold back = rhythmic current = forging a connection between us = alone locked up in the isolation of the mind = art unlocks the loneliness beyond itself and into you/me/us speaking to the heart = coming to the future = daring to dare = galloping horses = greater than myth = can you get there from here = giving birth from survival = searching the future = finding the dead = all to late = brush with extinction = roots of suspicious for an audience that doesn’t exist fossil humanity = to suppose the opposite = begging the question = relationship between extinction and evolution = has or will be = no body lives forever extinction always occurring in the background = any meaning for life = presuppositions = study of = are you prepared to do that = and on and on and on playing with words = we no longer think = jerky punctuation form = serve another purpose = culturally righteous = abandoned by collective wisdom = saving the border = voice that says = fight to the death = what are you saying = dying with dignity is it better than living = had a chance to survive = is it too late = legitimacy = that’s the problem = nobody cares = not sure = message for us = shot down = retaliated = danger in the hands = this is reality = can’t abandoning all principals = message for others the message is that we can do everything we can do = don’t think it is important = what is at stake = why should we care = not possible = what means that must care if you are to be = how to respond to the cry of humanity = give the chance = maybe it’s too late = is there a risk = have at each other = message of self portrait = citizen of the world = beauty and the beast = where does it come from = always a voyage of discovery = hard to take seriously instability = have to be happy = commodification of the human body = where does it go from here = what want to emphasize = life in a vacuum = deeply divided = deep separation = not a serious question serious concern = any small way = he who has the gold makes the rules = can you exist = principals of integrity = responsible to the public important not to focus = educated to have vested interest = very well disguised happening = looking at self = question of interference = no longer an issue = general agreement that that is the goal = the question is how we get from here to there = why do we need to talk about it = sense of grounding = make a difference always a civil war inside/out = culture war = raises the question = could we all agree laying ideas on the table = strictly speaking = time gabbing = time to stop = have you seen = despite or because of it = fictitious events = painting a picture = reconstructed = work of a skeptic = not their own = version of a folk tale = stand and deliver = what will you have = excuse me =how is that = bitter experience = how that for = how life begins = can’t win life/time back = pre verbal = talking inside = grasping point = walking through eternity = see if you can see = world with out end = arrangement of words = signs on a white field = quiet inside alone stillness of the night = coffin ships = what makes the world go round = transformation of meaning = wish i/you had an answer = stillness = it will ass = don’t have what to think = not making any sense = work hard have hard work fighting convention = human drives = mixture of metaphor = drama of the mind = no more i have lived = love what is it a cork in a bottle -Joyce who are you = not i = destiny did it = in the rough sand of the sea = time to go = sonless father and fatherless son = symboyosis = detached questions my thoughts about your thoughts about you about me = what is = views of the truth = the shinning truth = epiphany = unthinkable = days beyond recall old sweet song = into our grief = music makers = sitting by desolate streams = for ever it seems = build up the story of glory = go forth and free the measure as a treasure = a dream that is dying or one that is coming to birth = means of survival are passed on = consider options = generational alliance = control debate = ideological framework = cultural poisoning = pulling strings = cultural war = analogies re irresistible and risk = tied of you/me = bad consciousness = bear it = hopeless = after you’re gone = inside out = weeping inside = want to run away ad hide = behaving = something eluding = lapses of conversation = agreeable = kept thoughts to myself = deceitful and secret = pretending please = push off = mystery to blame for it = warning lights = poets moratorium = indifference = a poet with no poems = step into eternity = such is life = getting up in age = close to life to death = smell of death = wanted to scream = cryogenics of the mind = a nusciance to myself becoming free from myself = indifference = free yourself from loathing = consoled with deception = touching = a certain humility = almost indecent = gone mad = going downhill = fighting against hopelessness = fact the truth in the end we discover ourselves = thoughtful = battling with futility = a dangerous road = forget yourself = what does love look like = somewhere in the world bearing the truth = boring inside = in the mirror again = almost alive = it hurts = to know what = in a dream = hush little baby don’t you cry = hold on = soon to be = looking in on the past = cherishing a faded image = the punishment is loneliness = stolen identity = living corpse = Stifling how cam that be = symbolizing the mind = language of lies = unsayable = at the threshold = anxious to escape = said simply = how to be = it is believed = trapped in a cage = it is believed = through the heart = broken silence = the question is why silent hearing = getting a hearing = the fury about the wind = beware = sweet things = larger tapestry = the connection between = what makes you/me/us gestures coming together = declaim = rolling cigars to the rhythm of life = harvesting language = agri-culture = ears in the corn listening to the sound of the poetry of the wind = a place that has no words said unequivocal = locked into self expression = the walls have ears that listen to my silence = waiting for the mind to catch the future and the space to enter only when your are ready to die = feeling lost on paper = what is not said is what is said = coming out of stress = emerging from the mind = in search of itself = unraveling into a web of the imagination space around you where life moves in/around/through you/me/us = running into life = not allowed to dream in to the wilderness of the wild caged you a crying child on my shoulder watching my soul disappear into oblivion where nothing else lives where your are into yourself and into you = read on before and after it begins to end a commercial break = HOW TO AVOID avoidance = preserving the things that don’t exist at all cost = encountering myself in the mirror = the message reflects contempt of itself it’s lost innocence = continuing on in indifference to ourselves = i wonder why no romance = not myself = masquerading inside = the silent voice screams inside outside = grief of the lost mirage swollen in deep thought = giving birth to wonder = notes on a disappearing thought = but there it was = put it down = heart madness = on the other side = not enough = hoping that your in gently the hands = transcending myself = waiting for the universe to get into a dream proof reading the past = how to live = not an escape from the future = ideas in thoughtlessness = reaching out beyond poetry where the unsayable is unsayable unable to say = looking at the mirror and see you standing inside me = wondering if = for this i came to myself to see inside you leaps of the imagination = into the persona = a reflection of consciousness = into a concrete wall = beating the mind = in a perception of deception = deep inside i see you obscure = a tale told inside = out of range = pouring the sun into the eyes of a child = shinning through the veil of the mind = i look around myself as i wrap myself into a state of disbelief i wait for a mirage to come, but i know, you know…. we all know… unspoken i say containing the sounds of ancestors = uprooted into the moment of timelessness = i wonder to myself = where i am = am i from your sole comes a pregnant image = leaping into a poetic mirage i listen to you to me = aiming errors at the sun shooting my self i fly beyond imagination = talking to myself = who we are inside = who we are outside = who we are = who we = who a place between two stanzas i rest inside out = disappearing into the shadows = moving closer to a crossroads = waiting for time to move through my body and take me beyond thought and into the resting place of a quiet mind = wondering isolation = on the pulse of timeless moments = lost track of myself = reduced to a memory = bearing witness to = plunging inside = along the shore i listen to the sound of the universe pounding at my being = isolated i look at you/me/us and see i am you … i am the you of you… you are the me of me know what it means = the fog surrounds my thoughts = waiting for a dragon fly to carry my dreams = seven years later a niad i find inside my dreams = to live for a moment and then to tumble up into lost thoughts i discover a language without words without thought as i listen to the dragon fly searching for its moment – the promised land of dreams between two worlds = does it matter = name is not given = human urge = taught by life = began in a cave = dreams emerge = up the rope of time = climbing out of myself are you listening = ghost of blank verse stalk between history = filed with tales neglected = unwritten about = an imaginary poem gnawing away at the dreams = hunting by the song of unsung heroes = how far have we come = it’s all part of it promises of = refused to admit = standing on the edge of time = not a straight line = holding the sky in the mind = it could have been had i been emerging in a dream a poem that begins and ends with lost thought = more than i can image = knowing more than i can imagine = beyond comprehension think i know these things = no language to articulate = grappling with the imagination = waking up to the unexpected = pulling out from under the blanket of despair = voices calling from the subconsciousness of experience = what does that mean = for some reason one doesn’t know why or when = following myself into myself = wearing strange masks = undisguised by myself = not the person who i will become at the end of the world = breathing into the end of time = there it is not about what you think = it is about the end of the moment that begun in a dreams = and now it begins again the end of the world never ends it only begins lying still in the mind = building something within = poetry heals itself = and lives in the heart in the mind of the dreamer = and lives to dream filling self in self fulfilling = on the bridge between moments = on the magic carpet of poetry transports me into you and together we fly rhythm caresses the variations’ = smelling the scent of the marking of a mirage = confronting the endlessness = of time = in to the beyond = dreams courting reality = mating behavior of time = in pursuit of time = = synchronized in a ruthless beyond = accepting or rejecting the moment of time = forging a link between the future and the past = heredity = gives birth to itself = as life moves into fragility = scooping up the bonds of nature = = regurgitating life into the mouth of the night = fighting for the scraps = restoring harmony inspire of itself = imitating the future = playing with the past = carrying dreams on the back as a web that moves through the colors of myth-maker and weaver of metaphors and dreams = the hand on the cave of timelessness waits in itself to become its’s own light = forgetting the time = penetrating the look the future = a lifetime of lost dreams = veiling a simple truth locked into the past = into the power of wonder = who are we = the dawn of imagination = scouring the mind = inspite of itself = and that is the problem = sharing the dream = nearly human = putting a face on the dream = being watched by a poem of imagination of words taken by surprise = startling gaze leaving mark on the world = altering the landscape of the mind deciphering the mind = unsuspecting at the foot of a sleeping dream = overtaken on the dark side of = final moments = a fragment of discover touches the moment doesn’t happen every day = when time runs into itself = shared by itself on discovers lost thoughts… passing through pomp and a moment of remembrance = from the depths of the earth = names line the earth = forgotten messengers = scrawling in the space of time = never closed = never still = changing of the guard that guards change = comes a time when time comes = as the footsteps in the sky remember the untouched memories = that are not allowed to die = and then pass on beyond themselves = life goes on two becomes on as love moves into the forest of the mind = where birth soon becomes = she gives us and gives back = in the promise of the smile of a child eyes there dwells the wonder of the spirit no waves the spirit of the dancer as the eyes move intro the mind and back again waiting for a glimpse of the wonder of things = imparted by legends of the past into a beacon the digerdoo breaths life into a life force that = seeking a link with the future = timeless in dreams = spiting the soul on the hand of the cave we paint and leave only a small hand print into the beginning and then in the end = time to listen to words that have no sounds and sounds that are beyond words a metaphor standing in the sun = waiting for revelations = in an exquisite reflection = under attack by the mind = trees fall in the forest as time heals itself = a child hood dream = shed light as patients and time runs out threat to life on earth = demise of dreams = a threatened species = beyond the grasp = slaughtering the = creating a new image = understanding fear is understanding the unknown = disoriented = roaming the mind = a battle ground = against indifference = for better or for worse = becoming the distortion of a nightmare = reflecting itself and projecting itself = a vision of the invisible = the mind struggles to free itself from its invisible bind = unraveling = clinging to life = the task is not so easy = how long can this go on = no alarm bells in the mind = the foundation of life = goes on fighting = a romantic dream = shy and unaggressive = an irreconcilable thought = a cometary of thought = fate remains in doubt = irresistibly drawn = reverence for thought = sparing loneliness of a vanishing dream escaping being boiled alive by the mindless action of thoughtless glimpses = eyes on the world = conquering mount Everest of the mind = setting foot on top of the world = struck by the absence as darkness shrouds us in fear = on the edge of a dream = promises circling thought = cooking a frying pan of the mind = a balancing act where nightmares are born = inside in the underground cave = stalactites of the mind entering the untouched places = something only dreamt of = buried soul = terror of the mind = no time to think = moving slowly = resistance to thought = heart like a stone = not to be envied = betrayed innocence = deserting the future = perish of laughter beneath no one = psychobabble = silence = doing nothing = need not do anything = become quiet = still = hard to be quiet = living with self ;and don’t know themselves = getting in touch = the universe is as is = letting go of ideas = beyond limits of rational thought = defenselessness = working against the culture = blaming the world = next wave = grasping emptiness = ready to think about this = save yourself and save money here for boys and there for girls = diaper of the mind = leave it to = never had it so good = softer fluffy feel so good = nobody does all that = success in all area of our life = do what need to do = really getting involved = simply natural = ego calculates = hearts see the heart knows time getting away from you/me/us = like to get back to that = nourish life with attention = a seed has a thousand flowers = silence the mind = feel emotions = words are like seeds in the mind = intentionally unintentional = the way it used to be = want out of life = memory is the offspring = software of the soul = witness my/your/our selves = misunderstanding = devastated by terror = life never be the same again = day time night time = feel timeless = can be scary = why you/me/us = until now = essential = control fear = disconfirming = betrayed innocence = deserting the future = perish of laughter = swept beyond comprehension = no basis = nothing known = no one can say if there will be a tomorrow = to know if life is not completely meaningless is the question = worse than slave to the mind = heart silent and broken = servant of the master of the mind = with abandoned = in the agony of despair = indifferent = trying to get inside myself = slaughtering of innocence = slaughterhouse of the mind = hiding from survival = emaciated souls = lost in disbelief = = shrieking in silence = mislead = hunger of loneliness swells the soul = will it ever end = fear seizes the mind = and cripples the soul of the child within = haunted humanity = hunts in the shadows of time = fleeing itself = alone in the darkness of the mind = heart beating as if trying to out run itself = rising in convulsions = in mortal fear delivering oneself as a victim = from/into suffering = suffering from illusion = beaten back in the mind = megalomania of the ego = starving innocence within/without = wait wait something something = even the dead have to wait = who knows the way = which way echoes inside out = faces beyond imagination = save yourself from time before it’s to late cries the shadow of lost illusions trying to find imagination = concerned = way to early to draw any conclusions = trapped inside = devastation inside = beginning to come out of the devastation = insulated world = isolation = fiercely polarizing = some day our day will arrive = leap froging = carnage of terror of the mind = seen way too much = anything you can conceive of = yet another threat = attack on the soul = act of cowardice = not tolerate = unsure of what had happened = counter terrorism of the mind = to costly = learn well after the fact should never have happened = beyond comprehension = trying to make sense of senselessness = words fail = there is no wisdom = not been removed = unstable = who and why = highly dramatic = serious attempt = tug and pull = shifted = organized waste of time = extracting from trapped = ferreted out = likely scenario = madness of violence close off all avenues = unearthing secrets = illusive answers = the dark heart of the unknown = when the heart of the flower imagines = nothing which we are to perceive = forever with each breath = voice of your eyes = not even the rain has such small hands = counterfeit of curious/spurious imitation = in the lap of humanity = marvel of this thing = whose soul dangles from his watch chain = death mask of = born of a pawn shop = the other play is almost played = = mendacities fakes = humanity selected/unselected = all sorts of illusions = i may add pertaining to past present and future = undivided = writer of fairy tales = forgetting the secrets of life = take it from me kiddo = believe me = my country t’is of thee myth behind the smile = quote/unquote = trying to find the mind = but never had any to lose = wraith in progress = submerged = amoral morality = it may be fun to be fooled = more fun to be = savory words = tragedy of life = dynamite = cautiously looking around = suspension ladder from life = gruesome mediocrity = salvation through assimilation = became a mucker = centuries passed = un close me the end is not yet = small paradise = hurried alive in a word/words = somewhere i have never = eyes have silence and enclosed me i asked a shadow = mouth taking footsteps of wordlessness = forgotten thoughts = mutilated ghosts of forgotten thoughts = words float like birds of a flock = a little of forever = unobvious = through the unquiet = ever wonder why = never forever = dying ghosts whisper in your/my/our ear = shadow sings = nobody ever thought truth beyond perceived = unimaginable = words that grow and gather gentleness on the wings of a whisper = till mountains speak the truth = wailing instrument = cries which are wings in opposite comment = the strength of weakness = most rightfully wronged tomb waste land of the mind = forelorn hope = hard tasked = don’t yet know loss = every body you/i/we know = giant feeding tube = bringing everything = for whom the big news = still waiting for the word = kind of thing magnifies = still reverberating = praqyers for the dead/live = bound together = deon’t yet know loss = what can you do = feel deeply = heart in heartland witness to the world = not to mention = never seen before do you know = is it clear = insight coming from = making possible the impossible = ink staied wretch screams in the mind = riffling through life = eyes that see the unseen = cold hearted = memory at war with nature = nothing remains except relics of the mind = sight unseen = under the dome of = learn to listen = legend of the jungle of the mind = wild honey dripping from a dream = eyes that see the unseen = in-sight = lost sight of = unsightly = ear to the soul = sing softly = a little closer to the dream = clothed in words = touches you = harmonic structure = accompanied the self = step aside bottomless pain = dream betrayed = easier to live in pain than to live = hiding behind = stark = dark = courage of coward = hiding from the see through mirror = benign = beyond time all you give is what you get = chasing the dream = don’t know how i remember = over wrought = vaguely = can’t fathom = what else is there = can you imagine till death do us part = doesn’t make any sense = take your time = doesn’t make any sense = ever since = know nothing about it = saving grace = wait = meet you at the end of time hard to remember = brings/bring back memories = don’t remember = slipping backwards in time = unspeakable = no language for it = facing the see through mirror fly with me = beyond time = beyond though = voice from inside = close eyes and smell the air terrorized by thought/mind = stricken by = cries out from inside = tortured souls = grasping at fireflies in the mind = the thought of it = unthinkable thoughts released by light = on the path = burnt rock = river of strange confluences = beneath long grass i lie looking inside = invisible truth stares me in the face road to hell = time capsule = leaps into the void = memories await their time = thoughts ramble as if in a whirlpool = incessant struggle to get back to the end = blake play with the tortured soul of dante before the inferno of the mind can’t stop from falling = falling apart = against the odds = problem a lot bigger and wide spread = = somethings never want to think about = far from over = hotline = how far go to get it = new shocker = unconscious = suffered brain dangerous = guilt = not in charge = raises questions = involves you and me = fantasy = can’t wait = test ride = take a look = opportunity = for this = a great deal = over before you know it = blue print = truly frightening = worries unfounded = recaping = revenge for life = certainly uncertain = conclusion at this level = dreaded news = hot spots = stone cold = unreplaceable revolt of justice = act of mutiny = never seen anything quite like it = refusing to hear = unnecessary and inappropriate = charges of misconducted = not facing repercussions = resolving dispute = eminent danger = accused = misreading = anything missing here = danger here fertile ground for thinking = remember here = alienated and angry = arbitrary and brutal = extreme = rallying cry = might not be away = something devious = fingerprint = visceral reaction = skeptic = what’s the speculations = questions being asked and unasked = how much thinking = who’s pulling the strings = some questions that have to be asked = not an aberrations = profound impact = traumatic = shows that = cliche not mentioned it uncovered the tip of the tip = unsettling = diminished the horror = seems even worse = circumstance = widely held = the living all but gone = entombed within the wreckage of the mind within power = the speculation of the unknown = message to children = sending messages = heart pounding = painstakingly slow = bit of a hint = focusing = transformed = surrender = witness to …… = stands as a tomb = no question = not so clear = if and when = came very near = overstepping bounds = battle cry = in some peoples eyes they justify anything = remote possibility = don’t believe it’s going to happen until it happens = shaken up = living in some total of your experience = something going to blow = another battle/war cry = not eying its right = suspects = in make up = more boisterous = despises everything stands for =something out to be done = not seen evidence that that is the case = what do i have to do = pay attention = until = can’t understand what’s going on inside you/my/our heads = always with you in thought everything is not what it is or appears to be = time disappeared = rebellion of the soul = take a closer look = problem understanding that thinking = what are we talking about just getting aware of ourselves = moving away from feeling = revisiting the soul = unbroken stretch = inappropriate = history began at the end of the beginning = still trapped restored = what is the biggest threat inside or outside = lost = can’t get to close = don’t permit the unpermittable = generating hatred = you would think so = in/out of touch with reality = conspiracy against innocence = overlapped = find out what has happened = matter of oversight = infiltrating innocence = never out lived the pain trying to get to the bottom of = don’t blink you might miss something = wearing a lot of hats = moving the mind at the speed of light/darkness the difference is = more ways than imagined = room for more = heroic proportions = dark thoughts = world could come to an end = who knows what going to happen = how could anyone reign of terror = feeling safe = from now on until forever = relinquishing freedom voluntarily = reduced to the lowest common level = seizing with the hate of hate = brain 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updates on terror = lot of things haven’t tried = down fall of the self = far gone = final episode = unspeakable = can not begin to comprehend = at the base of humanity = heritage of humanity = separate selves = just to believe = no one talks about life in vain = gauging the depths = held breath and waiting and nothing happened = wearing heritage of humanity inside skin = lie about who i/you/we are = replaying life again and again before it’s too late = promise of a safe place right of = no memory = in a strange and rhythmic = life it self is maybe a movie = fasting for belief = questioning who and what we/i/you are forgotten rag doll = as if we are here = never had these conversations = feasting on imagination = from the face of the earth = desecrated hollowness thrusted into the future = is this really happening = memory of lost mirages = = stolen memories = stolen lies = live in exile = spearing the = melting harts = thoughts of you = mother of all time praying for the future to 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introducing the end of the beginning = so hurry = death of a legend in the mind fighting back at the mirror = following shadows = somebody elses life = back to back = having time of life = join now before its to late = is it a dream =walking around as a ghost = no plausible scenario = tired of living = just passing through = trying to find roots a connection = flip side = double edged sword can kill you = not a great hope telling you that convicted of murder out of own mind = locked away in the mind = drowning sorrows = it may not be entirely nonsense = open and shut case = silence is what it is = thought ought to warn you = sitting in judgment the point is = it should all be over = miscarriage of justice = must bear responsible for = presence of mind and body acting in collaboration = was it all a mistake = pressure of life and thought = going down into the cells = can’t keep it bottled up = gerontophilia = beyond reasonable doubt = meaning to have a word with you lost sleep over it = 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tell me i don’t have to do this = is this what i was born to do = dreams in the recesses of the mind = the minds eye = in the light of the night there dreams the dreamer see insightful inside the recesses of the soul that lies beyond sight = stone rubbings insight and insightful lost to thoughtless minds that have lost their insight to the soul and now see shadows on the cave of the mind vanquished madness = bored by sense of impotence = giving up the ghost of the future = what more can/could i do = imprisoned in a lie = beyond the pale = trying to disappear = by strength of will = seeds of a legend in the mind = changing the facts to fit your/my/our needs = the magnificence of the past = your/my/our life time goal is to earn a footnote in history challenge of pessimism = closer encounters = memory incoherent = enveloped inside = lost meaning = lost memory = gap between life and memory/imagination/mirage circumstantial = referring to themselves = private emotions = leaping into a 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in a sea of resentment = eating the soul inside out = less is more but nothing is still something = out of the clouds = missing in action = whatever comes into the mind = crossing the imagination = state of mind = crises of the soul = memory of the future = past illusions = there is a telephone call from/for you = forget it = short sighted = derelict = prisoner of time = spinning = looking for meaning = dream dying = chilling moment of = are you ready = distracted from life = hurried disappointment = cast away from = liberating what about hope = can’t go on = to follow the star = mythical = inspired = can’t go on = heart peaceful and still = so impossibly high = things with no answers = marching into the anxiety of speculation = reaching for the unreachable you/me/us = breaking through view of the underworld = invisible = lifting the lid of the unknown = compelling = vivid dream = seeing the impossible dream = dream lover refugee from hell = dark side of the moon = without reflection = a living hell = loss of innocence = a pale and drawn shadow of a mirage of my/your/our selves = not as easy as you think = if you will permit me = you know the reality = don’t see a thing = in the midst = a state of mind = a kiss goodbye = elevated into the beyond = pushing it to the edge = all you can be forces of fear = people are dying = think you’ll feel normal some time soon = ability to cope = long term effects = hurt and pain in the voices = disillusioned = war torn hearts = hearts torn out = contentious = addressing discrimination = getting more conscious = taking into account a great variety of factors = more to be done = who benefits = glass ceiling = just amount of time = attitudes about capacity = getting the way = how do you respond to that = stands to reason = feel like you/i/we are not ourselves = seems possible to make way = displacing = no longer possible = no turning back = deluded = rejected for no reason = review of distrust = hopes and aspirations abandoned = 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you nothing is as it seems = deceived = shocking warning = growing uncertainty = unviable = grim assessment = throwing up hands in despair = into a predicament = faced with all this = hostage = divided against itself = under siege in the greatest need = infuriating = unable to unable = come what may = time and time again = shot at life = part of the problem and the cure not as good as it looks = unforgiven = a last thought = should we be surprised = advertised weakness = brought back to life = looking at the future = bringing out the soul = to the roots = an attitude = take it a little further = broaden horizon = take it further = don’t lose the passion waiting for a dream = we’ll see = trying to hide = because of you/me/us life will go on and on = you never know = unlimited possibilities = is someone looking for you/me/us = nothing soothes = sparkling crack a case = eminent disaster = deceived = intruding = intrusive = the great deception of humanity =insuperable like one person = unspoken = what can i tell you = out of no where reinvestigating life = can’t stop thinking = didn’t know who i/you/we are = everything a mirage a lie = a deception thought had no choice = dead men tell no lies = integrated into = clinging to life = close call = whose in charge around here can’t buy time = wasting time = get what you get = apply before it become a fact = devouring time = revealed = no where to hide = no matter how difficult = grizzly discoveries inside = coming up next = unearthing more and more the latest news = moves groans and cracks = knowledge that death is all around you = odor of death = overpowering = in hearts is anybody alive = grim chore of recovering the soul = grim memory = among the missing = is this the end taking aim = climate of hate = creating an atmosphere = purveyors of hatred = chilling effect = nothing but contempt = hate speech = want to know symbols of tragedy = broken hearts = looking for answers of why = restrictions on = furor of = driven by strength/weakness = up against the mark = approaching = hesitant to bet = beginning to recover = marginal drop = at war with ourselves new fears of terror = defies belief = looking for a home inside = inside job = post traumatic = lives out of control = no identity = making a statement = pushing it down = after a certain amount the human spirit can only take so much opportunity to have a life = attitudes changing = sarcasm = searching inside for the guilty = vulnerable from inside and out no time to be talking = getting lost = threats to you/me/us = alleging = abuses of power = fools rush in = history of abuse = protection from my/you/our selves suspect = pendulum swung to far = evidence of threats against innocence = extremely vulnerable = not over reacting = disapated soul = say one more thing that concerns me = not willing to pursue battle against terrorism against innocence = division of the soul = condition faced = prepared to reach beyond our reach = grim tally = elusive = armed and dangerous = remaining silence = doubting something believing in an illusion = too much to ask = touched the lives = we are all suspects = by very words = gathered to say good bye to innocence = dreading from getting into = getting through not knowing = the latest on the search for humanity = rumor = looking for significance could terror of innocence be/been prevented = think about it = pardon me = allow me = look out = designed to = shifting picture = sorting it all out = surveillance = getting a better view = seeing from the inside what does that mean = nobody else is either = without any reservation = foreclosed = are we where we want to be = hoping to find the unforeseen not in and of itself = voice concerns = handing off a terrible legacy = carrying the message = all of that and more what makes you/me/us us = what are you doing that i /we aren’t doing = mostly opinion = master of illusions = mirages = created an illusion you/me/us silence says it all without saying a thing = you can tell it without actually knowing it unafraid = didn’t ask those types of question = shied away from asking the difficult questions = perhaps it could be argued = doing things that put you/me/us in jepourdy = standing up to = rocking the boat = overcoming the odds = in every which way = held out in every which way = hidden meaning = defining perception = indisputably = analogous = stood aside = reflection of the times = one of a kind = curiously enough = great irony of all time = wouldn’t tolerate = got to remember = how should we/you/i remember = what should we remember tenor of discussion = no obligation = good legacy = elevated the mind = with impact = many go through life without impact finding imagination = trying to capture the spirit of it all = that insane = just insane = anecdotes = anything is possible = hard to figure = life a figment of imagination = what’s true is true missed moments = betrayed by incompetence = blacken name = negativity played up = told the story = saying things you don’t mean = what if this isn’t the truth = unfair and sometimes misleading = ability to completely change direction = series of time bombs in the mind = agonizing = keep coming back = kill the roots = see for yourself once again = feeling of continuing frustration = derailing = undermining = innocent people have live/dead = why is this happening = who’s behind it = don’t know who’s behind it = whose manipulating = convicted in the mind = fear from the self = won’t last forever = heart sick = what seeing = divisiveness = erosion of confidence = for and against = stretch of the imagination = panorama of contradictions = fear of one another = heard this before = what is going on here is no different than what is going on inside all of us = baffling = brutality brings more brutality = torn between emotions = what is real = blaming it on fear = beginning to run out of time = the problem is us eating my/you/our selves up = fomenting hate = despair of surviving = betraying life = beset with problems = fear of losing memory = memory fades into oblivion = presence remains = come to terms with death/life = consider this = living in the mud = engraved in the heart = consider this = averted faces = capture day to day = montage of life = with excerpts from the mirror = juxtapositions within/without =private thoughts and doubts = of intimacy and terror overturning stereotypes = challenging wisdom = sobering honesty = entwined = too little is known = unsure how to interpret the future = changing perception = dangerous mix of ignorance and intolerance = revealing volumes of unthought thoughts = memoir of the unknown = mouth watering delights = lost ability = enchant = seduce = collapse of optimism = disappearing = last gasp of the promise of dreams post war thoughts = emergence of thought/dreams = lost roots = context of = questioning = collective memory = lesser known = illuminating = controversies about you/me/us = denied = can’t be left in the hands = no nonsense = non-discriminating = appropriate strategies = through the process = anecdotes from the soul = impact = amid inertia = currently facing = acclaimed = = candid = key issues = called to action = private crisis inside/out = intrigue = torn by strife = buried in the jungle of the mind = avoiding brutal torture = isolated = digging = inside secrets = interrogating the mind/soul = bizarre = proving innocent = slow and haunting = fatal agony of innocence betrayed antidote to a toxic mind = sorting out the minds eye = flimsy ground = quicksand of the mind = other peoples problems = silent dialogue of the mind unforeseeable = unforeseen = unforgettable = unintentional = insidious trend of the unthinkable rarely discussed = quiet reversal = open the door = outspoken = threatening to dismantle = back to the promise = turned back on = about the state of today collection of profiles = candid = speaks to inside you/me/us = genuine complexity = burned images = began to make our/your/my way = taboo subject = spectrum of = blatantly unbalanced = images of hysteria = warily = wide spectrum of you and me = rendering a heart wrenching portrait of ourselves cost of conflict = against the beast inside/out = witness to self torment = self discovery = all about you/me/us = on the shores of imagination = visual vocabulary = what tells stories = shaping consciousness = invigorating = darker side of human existence = frightening faces importance of being blind = erased by time = verbal assassins = encouraging hope = well conceived = carry around inside of you/me/us = heavy with contempt = choiceless = longest moment = of no consequence = disentangling = in the silence = looking in the shadows = human obsession = drawing on long tradition = conciliation to mortality = nature will go on whatever we do to our selves = passed on = the nature we seek we need to lose ourselves and find ourselves in nature = seem to say = backtrack = whenever we try and do something = always thinking in 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pain = in the empty silence = the system continues to go = near the end of time dream away reality = inspiring bumping into a dead end = if we’re all in a coma = what are we all doing it = talking to myself = all embodied different voices inside each other = this is a true story = well most of it s = everything talks to each other = sabotaging = sabotaging the mind = = restoring hearing = how do we get here = can’t out run death = running out of time = end of a long time = something has to happen = waiting for life to happen come back when you can fly = what you think this is =how does that look = man in the moon = come down to earth = waiting to go in = if i was = if you were = if we were = sometimes i wish i was = it is what it is = and that’s it here what its like before = whose looking at you = keep eyes to = eyes left = eyes right = eyes up eyes down = look around it’s all real = finding what’s all out there = by time it gets = pass it on get it = don’t know = get it = it’s a signal = whole language on the edge of things = caged light looking for meaning where there may or may not be any = sky floating by on a cloud in a dream looking down at you/me/us finding thoughts before the rain of the mind takes a shower in the wilderness of time = longing for a place inside of you can almost feel the other side of the world = talking fast mind running around in circles = couldn’t believe it = part of the country = put yourself up = next to nothing = what to do = somebody might see us/you/me = in slow motion = waiting for a dream = door creaking open as if to invite the light inside = climbing stair to the stars = knocking on the womb = abandoning the horizon = in a field of sunflowers no point to it = shivering in dreams = watching the day upon day as life empties into the stream of thought = shots in the night pass as arrows through the heart = and the bed creaks no more = birds sing as if unsung and life ebbs into darkness while death and life merges into a new mirage as a new image grows in the womb and itself and becomes the future before it too passes into the past of the future death staring you/me/us in the face = what do we do = looking in the mirror trying to see through myself into you before the time comes to go = indictment of life = it’s a lonely place = human beings = need protection against the lies and abuse of the mind = the other side of it = in this consideration = context of misleading innocence = cause you/me/us concern very last thing in the world = investigation of what is happening = what do we expect = from the very beginning = had an open mind = inferred = suggested = not alone = not much of a case all = not a lot to ask = maybe it’s not = in some ways = a big extravaganza is going on here = that never happened before = it’s ;troubling = concerned how the system is working = does all this make sense = not after the truth = entitled to ask = would we do it all over again = cannot believe what i/you/we are hearing in the first place = we don;t want to talk about = invaded and occupied by = talking about experience = depends on what your experience is = basic reason unreasonable = what is the message = suits me = one human being with one set of experiences = life is at stake in every moment = opens up questions for all of us = putting finger what concerns me = if i only got one thing to say- this is not the way want to think about = does raise issues worth thinking about = first thing we would want to do = combination of events = something seem to go on forever for all that we have heard = natural extension = vanquishing the vanquished = torpedoed = what is the issue = how far is the future paradigm shift = how far off is the future = what are the consequences = around the world = homogenizing influence = brought us together and apart = looking for a place in the future = how to do this = question conventional wisdom = if it doesn’t make sense = primal connection with nature = life shared experience embarked on a = not an authorized = amazing when you look around = interesting and compelling = how do you explained the contradictions in life = beyond me = trying to view contradictions = all things being equal and people being people = almost impossible to doubt = absolutely unpredictable = bringing the outside in STRUGGLE TO GROW MORE SELF AWARE = on an individual basis = is the future not to feel anything nothing = to not feel facing the lie = consciously unconscious = lying in wait = belying the myth = lie within/out = fiction of fact = crucifiction = illusion of a mirage = facing the mirror of you/me us heart of darkness = pull skin off while alive = too much hopelessness = waiting = destruction of our/your/me heart = desperate for hope = tap dancing through the mind of despair = shattered lives = ambiance = one sided = preserved ties to = breaking away = dramatically = detached = origin = needed to get away = emotionally hooked = little did i know = dysfunctional = big deep 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l = who cares = quietly unfolding in fact = perception is as important as reality = no left overs = deficiency = hard to believe = ridiculous idea can’t leave it like this = nothing happened = eloquent = everything changes = complex = afraid = not end of world = it won’t stop = more harm than good = only one i can talk to = mind is a weapon = the future is creeping past us = catch up to the future = finding out about = discrepancy between future and past = get down to business = don’t stop the plow = inspiring = listening = bring it back = the judge = hold on tight = didn’t know = I’ve been thinking = living in a legend = changed beyond recognition = i’m listening = what is it = trying to get inside the mind = confused operation = instrument of torture = tragedy of innocence = cast under the spell = ascending order = dead air = over acting = infection = loneliness = courageous voice = more tears waiting for you = detained = have you seen = can’t close eyes = humanity driven away = 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anyone = changed the course of the universe = carefully scrutinized = difficult to accept = challenges sensibility = how to build in the city today = one has to recognized = live in a city the celebrate pluralism = juxtaposition = viewer and user = how does that influence = what struck me = unlimited possibilities = never gave up = more importantly = something else here = perpetuating the myth gets back to = passed by the founding father = in new direction = that explains it = somewhat abrasive = trying to perpetuate the future = lot of emptiness there = role of = nothing held back = forever = notice anything different = every bit of = even more so = so far so good = as far as the eye can see = setting man traps of the mind = adroit = then let you go, that will do = intact = good breading = hardly the type = off hand = inflicting = distress of the mind = ruin unfortunate = want to talk to you = to spare as much pain as possibly = want to know why = condemned to life of = refused to 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i know nothing = dreaming of you or are you dreaming of me = shadow of me/your self = juicy and spicy = limits of our own = unbelievable weak heart = start taking care of it = not to busy = this wherever you live = don’t know how to put this = like you to look at this = polite pretense = on behalf = place your bets = what will you do without me = ahead of plans = building the future = another story = hypnoses = feeling of shame = who has what = see if can find it = thought of something else = fear of truth and love = know where = every person is a story = feelings of shame = question of values = strange and painful = disintegrating in front of my eyes = until the earth stood still growing wings = nothing never lasts = go on = man is no bird = wake up = sorry i have to ask = never saw again = a hot house flower blowing in the wind unprovoked = smothering the soul = no end of harm = fighting with conscious = last to alive = trying to avoid = offering a lift = first thing to me head = is 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that’s everything we have to see = right at the door = mode of destruction = by humanity = wreaking havoc = vast forest of life = un assuming = wind break = changed the landscape of the mind = it would be nice to show you but there is none left = disappearing species = historian of the future may refer to this as a unique tragedy driven out = changing nature = icons = from somewhere else = final wave = according to = over exploited = disappear = extinction the ultimate end = don’t even know what you lost = world drastically changed = not fathomed = wake me up = where are we going so fast = trying to change road we’re on = no better time to be a listener = babbling spring = more boisterous = splashing = jump and tumble over = on towards destiny of unknown dreams life undisturbed = what it means to hear to see = to listen before we slip into oblivion = effect us all = threatened = cultural extinction = reigned = thrived in hardness = way of life disappearing = forgotten spirits of ancestors = losing part of ourselves = ancient culture = contributing to loss = proceeding rapidly = sense of being invisible = in unexpected ways = deep forest = sanches and eric mouke = mouquet = exploring ancient songs = searching for a pearl = to the outside world = remaining on earth = forgotten myth remembered = vanishing soul = a reminder = opening the mind to possibilities = boundaries between you and me = essentially looking at the spirit = new vision = survivors = questioning = can it carry on without soul = an attempt to understand our own selves = tied to each other = separating ourselves from ourselves = separation between humans and there nature = synthetic world = decorating ourselves into an illusion = made possible = asking the question = how did we get here = same as it ever was = separating humans from nature perpetuating a myth = don’t need life = can live without it = our world and then the other world = sense of strangeness and distance = trying to discard the 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the first step = mission = reconnaissance = surveying = new picture = what lives here = maybe severe = greeted by a singing = long been ignore = valuable insight inside taken for granted = get out of attitude = reservoir = insure that we survive = first step is to recognize that we are alive = attempting the impossible = redesigning life = not going back to mythical Eden breaking up = fragmented in a sea of humanity = need to connect = sharing = giving up = how can we live together = where eagles fly = large question how we relate to ourselves and nature which is us = the wonders of this world of which we are wild things = legacy = to pass it on = to the future = deep inside a vast jungle = stretching to infinity = roaming = gone and replaced by a piece of the past = heart of the jungle = difficult to see = stepping back in time = seen in the wild = unwilling to change = reborn from baroness = in heart serves the world/humanity unknown treasure = strand in life = woven together = field of weeds = discovering new things that are undiscovered = miraculous detail = begun to vanish = difficult to get a dialogue that doesn’t go below the surfaces = the barometer = not reflect qualitatively = = it all depends = getting out of the way = whether perceived or not = not the way it works = had an idea = change nature = instead of trying to play catch up = take under siege = pulling it together = in it to make it work for all of us = fighting way out of whole = great fascination = NOT WANT TO GET RIGHT DOWN RIGHT A WAY = keyed up = dog fights = all of a sudden = instantaneously = lose consciousness = hopeful return = keeps blood in you head = mediocrity never acceptable = catapulted into air = concentrated mind = nobody wants to be lost = movement = handler = languishing launching = put fear aside = energy contagious = simulated = a story that is continuous = to the limit = superficial = flying low = broken to the limit = cover from proving = confused = can become sever = danger unrelenting = know to expect = workout game plan = waiting to appear = converging forces = maneuvering for position = closing in behind = in pursuit shot down in the real world = too late the fight for ?? is over might not be as good = begging situations = lesson in humility = humbling egos = taken lessons to heart = piecing together = over vast areas of = prepares for = merging = demanding = wholly engaged = life and death nature of it = in order to provide = monitoring situation = renewed contact = new urgency = readiness = fulfilling purpose = projecting strength = enforcing = moments of sleep are grabbed when chance are = mood changes dramatically = in a perfect world situation = without a ripple = on the edge = real possibility = in case = easy to get complacent = need to be ready for it = escorting = = protecting innocence = rules of engagement = disconcerting = ends without incidents = traveled between language = can prove fatal = wearing down = living in tribes = to big for ourselves = abandoned convention = constant vigilance = elegant silence = tribal secrets = intruded = voyeurs = studied curiosity = loss of moral = moral = superiority = not connected = narrow world = peeked = who will claim us best we can = what do you really remember = who knows the truth = impossible to explain = looking forward to going back = incredible = see the world = getting closed in = with a little help = alert and in sight = committed to = extending = sun rises = begins another day = easing in the air = gets under way = maintaining pressure = in the general areas = sustaining presence = principal role = everybody is valuable = little contact = key figure = to be about = representing = around the clock = relentlessly = not a lot of time = what do we live by = expedite = where I’m at hide an seek = between life and life = connected = and yet understand very little = no worse for wear = vanishing sounds = sounds of life are music = chained to existence fortuitous madness = music of earth = chorus of humanity = migrating at night = ruffled feathers = struck with an idea = not long on long speeches = as far as the eye can see = we have to stop it = prevented from going in direction = depends = last thing i saw = relatively = has to do with how much = pitfalls opening up = given where we want to go = all sorts of arguments = dramatic from the inside out = listen opinion is your opinion = not see it happen = strikes me = think worth to talk about = fertility = walking with ghosts = turning up/down = for a purpose essence of what believe = skeptical = not able to match = fundamental divide = debate = nobody certain of this thing = actions and reactions = simplistic think backwards what remember most = crawled up in a ball = feel safe = about to blow in our faces = at this point = negative impact = none would believe = never again = offset = have to pay more attention = serious problem memory meet eyes = feeling of terror = jarred a memory = listen to this = falling over each other = what are we supposed to do = world driven made self invisible = humanly possible = repressed memories = separate self from what has happened = continues to say so = a lot of work to be real = no sense in denying = richly detailed = it is possible to have witnessed = out of sight but not out of mind = evidence of influence of memory = recollection = conductive = changed story = memory came to = document = backed away = masking truth = peeling away the truth finding a way to deal with the truth = no corroborating evidence = verdict of the mind = direct relationship between = at a later time = traumatic experiences = verified = validated = what are we missing = claim = unavailable = recovered = trust me will not do it historical turning point = taken seriously = hardly unusual = changing understanding = memory = lost of people remember things that are not collaborated = if there is no witness does it mean that it doesn’t’ occur happened a long time ago = what to do = molesting the mind = a Sunday afternoon = taking so much time = horrified = stunned = making it up = had done something wrong = feel wrong = no question further = admitted what done and asked = never discussed faded out of mind = tried every which way = wall of not remembering = = the whole story = need to know this = a wave of memories = it all fit = everything fit = no one knows = what remembers is not clear = trying to make sense out of nonsense didn’t know what all is going on = felt like person = what does that mean = troubled and depressed = looking for answers = rages in the mind = extreme = assuming = desperation out of the blue = addressing the issue = had to be something more = trying to access = sifting through forgotten memories = maybe you/i/we are going crazy = don’t understand what is going on = too real = if it didn’t really happen = = to be come clearer = not intimidated t tell the truth = more choices when tell the truth = that part of the truth can change you/i/me/us = need to be clear = tat this historical point = not challenging the facts = creating memories = consensuses validated don’t you agree = abandoned by life = lost and retrieved = implanted memories = false memories no way = tell the difference = product of = figment of imagination = more and more = reactions to what remembering make it real = deliberated = = weren’t there and didn’t go through it = accused = what do you win life goes on = attacking credibility = at its roots = reminiscent = what looking for = what stumbled on = developed a theory = present new finding to the world = stood up and talked = etiology of etiology = theory about what happens = caut nile = source of the nile = silence = seduction = wronged by right = false memories = seemingly well adjusted = seemingly heinous acts committed against ourselves = age of rediscover = criticism = not taken seriously = expressing unexpressed outrage = broken down = this has happened to all of us back where we started = aback at same place = voice in the wilderness = happen because = got do something about it = will not be silences = today stand before you = mind locked away = had know prior knowledge = off in own world = questioning memories = saying that says inside in the brain the memory of life will reappear = no one would choice that way to go = do you believe in you = inspired curiosity = throughout out history = never conquered = ordinary people = eye witness life inside your mind launching reality into outer space = heretofore it’s too late = wherever we go = and now up and down and all around and further more = divided only by doubt coming back like a magnet = need each other = honoring memory = sharing memories = hard to be outcast = secret = people not believing you/me/us = out in world alone = graphic truth = hard to say = getting more and more = didn’t realize why = feeling and grieving for lost self = safety net = tends to view problems in history = no memories until = taught to believe = what do we find out = immersed in belief to fabricate life = at which point who is hypnotizing who flashbacks of life = self proclaimed = vast majority = facing life is hard = that it happened = likely to have suffered amnesia of innocence = all things are possible = facts about life = and then there is the truth = the claims of reality = maybe they are valid = theories don’t make things true especially evidence = not able to doubt doubt = = regression of = traumatized by decisions and life overpowering = not aware of life = not working the way life would like it to = under fire = accessing memories = want to run from life = won’t go = masking the truth = tears welled up in eyes = unable to resist talking about eyes = don’t have to stay in here = backing out of it = going through it = now can see through the memories of life = not alone = murder in eyes = wrinkled from time a new phenomenon = able to see = distraught about self discovery = at the time = fascinating along with it = images had never remembered = access of the inside making up reality = shocking to see = deterioration = broken through the wall = all those feeling all those needs = finding a voice = submerged memories = serious doubts images inside not necessarily real = so whats new = along time ago = just beginning = beyond conceptual = stuck in the fallopian tube of life = source of problem = unbelievable = = become the religion of religion = the meaning of meaning receive guilt = forgiveness = replaced life with = lacking meaning in life = find meaning = desperately seeking my left hand = not being as happy as should be = no one would love or believe you/me/i = the idea of should = internalized = into the cells in the = feeling powerless = trying to uncover the soul = trying to fill in some of the blanks = remember the rest = snap shots = triggered by = forward to the next significant thing that happens = looking for a person to believe that makes sense of sense = images of our/me/your self not 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inside = second guessing yourself = nobody remembers = denial is easier = not reaching same place = in order to stay alive = concentrated on memories = not consistent with = suddenly just there = for some reason can’t open = for the survivor of life this is very real = not positive thing to take on = not to be found in reality = nothing to do with reality = clarifying delusions = give sense of validation = creating havoc with = social connect = narrow frame we live in = a different story = fractured into different = all have own opinion = vulnerable = institutional mothers = enormity of absurdity = no matter what = we all live in a delusion = does any of us know the truth = different than what actually occurred = reinjury recovered memories = corroborative evidence = how do you know it’s true = what actually happened is irrelevant = not to be a judge and jury = make sense out of live = make meaning out of experience = it may as well be true if you believe it to be how do you translate to the world when you feel it all the time = this is my/you/our reality = trying to understand own reality = shut down = rocking myself to = devastated by absence of = paralyzed unable to do anything = something have to live with it = horrified = fact of life = part of life = continues to be root of lack of = can live without unconditional = frightfully injured = something happened on some level that’s not fair = swept away = heart breaking = forgive unforgivable things = survivor of childhood torn apart = ripped heart out = denying convincingly if even if it is what it isn’t = obscenity of racism = made some progress = where need to go from here = govern opportunity = searching the mind = obsession shaping times = fascination = seeing ourselves in others = inferiority of the past = one off the other = aspiration = bringing it to life = tapping into what is going on inside = overwhelmed by the surface striking poses = got the way they came to be = got to be the way they are = digging away at the beginnings = under the bed = seamless = trying to find the grammar = seems inevitable = interpretation = through a prism = historical memory = bringing it to life = different interpretation vivid impression = trying to walk = open beginning of life = dramatic pause = go back to an earlier time = on a deeper level beyond interest in the shape of human life = abbreviated = hunger to see our lives in longer view = ambiguity = how to find our/our/my shape in a sense = before they/you/i/we die = source = tougher or easier = only witnesses = suppose there was no one there to record it = record your mind/soul not saying anything = see for yourself = have to be moved deeply = trying to penetrate the surface = trying to convey something not necessarily see I’ve got to make a terrible confession to you said Roosevelt and then…. make sense of = some people aren’t = backwards = more and more are = what’s your interest = clever = rise above reality = turn to in trouble = where to begin = what is the use = don’t even speak the same language = is anybody anybody = your move = if you can get a rhyme to rhyme then you they seek it here they seek it there = they seek it everywhere = if it rhymes it’s a poem = sadness is only for mortal = everything in it’s power and in it’s time take your place for the time is = minute by minute = horses galloping = didn’t even know it = believe so easily = if not you then who = promised life at what price = falling in love with a phantom = to face death = would you = must remember that = angels weeping = standing in the way of myself/your/our selves = why ask the question = shall i = yes indeed = on may way = what do you think you came here for = what do you expect me to do = something puzzling = could have said no = no idea how = not with everybody watching = have a few things to settle first = what are you looking for = anything over looked = see anything = under the rug = i know why you are here = why don’t you just ask you’re question = what’s the reason = know it to be true = care to tell me = can it matter = it might want to talk to you = what about = thinking of joining = why waste yourself = just want to want = no reason at all = what exactly are we looking for = think we should get back to it = anything else = rotten thing to live with it = down neck like a draft = concentrate = if i were you = whose to gain by all this got all the essentials = fed up with it all = the very thought of you = didn’t mean to startle you = where about where you = would you mind = didn’t stop to think no you don’t = make you feel better = try to remember = struggling to say something = why did this happen = there must be a reason = not quite right = from beyond the grave = at my/you/our expense previous history = a mystery = something special = astonished = search me = whole sordid business grace and dignity = help yourself = not found the time = had time on hands = long time out of life = to regain strength = perhaps = completely in the dark = what is troubling you = better to = frantic wondering = isn’t the case = = try to call something to mind = something that should have been there and wasn’t = a bit embarrassing look on the bright side = looks as if = evaporated = raw question is how = can’t tell you how sorry i am = don’t remember much else = don’t know what to say = right under our noses = nonsense = managed to engineer = must talk to somebody = can’t stand much more of this = walking around asking questions = show some respect for the Dead/living not rule any body out = too good to be true = to true to be good = suffered us not our last hour = undying = not a round at the time = only to be expected = getting restless = not complaining = overactive imagination can understand your feelings = i can promise you one thing = where were we = don’t mean to get personal = how long has it been = empty sometimes = trying very hard to forget = i might consider it there are a lot of reasons = maybe, maybe 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= targeted = = skyrocketing = new highs = agreed to = no change = concession = merger = moving up = buy back = forecasting = rumor = dropping = to outperform = just about = better than expected = initiating = take over = dynamics = value index = very bearish = rights = flexing mussel = getting out of control = social policy = plebeian = to obtain = part of debate various IDEA – = bottom line = longer tear = survey = last = seldom get = processes important = look for win in scenario = not likely = chances = replace = at no cost = tends to open = no know how many = can’t seem to agree = far apart = suspended = want o see = more and more = commentary = studies = prospects = increasing likely = sustainable = optimistic outlive = explosions = over heating = boom = unrestrained = cut off = early on out of hand = troubles = particular = don’t see = blow u[ = barring un predictable = jungle = bring more than just = golden returns = thank lucky stars = tail off = off beat = banner year = full 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really know = know what = goals to design = identical strangers = what does that mean = time is running out = beginning right now = made possible = another visit = every ready to confront the future = tangling with = should ring a bell = adventure of = a few liberties = the better to show = resorting to extreme measure = out of character = in time = a few clues = insidious trade = story opens = with a secret = the black mail of the soul = macabre = tortuous = no other way = remember the heart = remember innocence = lost soul to save the future = felt great sadness = heart of marble = a whisper = a moment of indiscretion = in the silence finds oneself the mask of innocence = one really can’t = can’t one = tell you nothing = seems to be on the point = a way out = we’ll never know = not the first or last as much in the dark as you are = you can be sure not first and last = let me know if you hear of anything = camouflage = sense of fortress of revulsion = no surprise = loathing the human race = starved for = prison of prison = victim of the mind = grieving for lost illusions = fearing the worst before time passes fear for the worst = not optimistic = delicate time = the matter is delicate = extracting = apart of life = leaving life behind cannot allow self to do this = intentions = one moment = much will be lost = souls only = tried to convince = home away from home = exposure = attacks = pursuing = human condition = greed and corruption = unscrupulous = compulsive = heart doesn’t understand = INTERNAl contradiction = natural extension = courtesy = not necessary = been corrupted = protecting self from self awareness = not trying to think = draw words = words by chance = throwing words out of a hat = attempt to bring order out of disorder = subconscious slave of consciousness analyzing instincts = nervous of = beneficiary of subconscious = not know to much about what’s going on = pretentious to say subconscious drives what i do in part = essence = can’t plan too much = premeditate life = no give in it = over planed life = rigid = scrambled eggs = lost sense = few in number = i don’t know how i did that = i know but i don’t know how = grabbed and ran with it = started with life in its own = idea laying on the floor/sky = curiosity that reached for that = subconscious for part of writing = in the middle of doing = nothing but = take my word for it = something going on which is not explainable relationship encountering the unrationed = time after time = at the end you have gotten something = the simple truth = it all goes click = do not = great strain = worrying about losing and finding it = haven’t got space for it = join human race = stopping in the act of creating struggling with new idea talking in code = no longer rely on others = intersecting = not completing thoughts = now you see now your don’t = lasting value = preceding over the years = it’s hella’va thing = taken away all he’s got and = underneath the front = sound it out = beguiling = no idea = got to something looking back over the years = over the future = incoherent = hard edge = tribute = seemed to have no future = past and present = out here = what it means looks like you = facsimile of you/me/us = the real = hope all but last = unforgettable = one of them = not better = hopeless = unpredictable = the way to look = could it get any better strange and terrible beauty = imaginative = haunting = connecting = beyond words = mystery and power of silence = time when dreams are made = love/hate = tenderness/cruelty = trying to find that which i don’t know = fish in an aquarium = finding a story to tell = story telling = public and private mode best left unsaid = can’t be expressed in words = aching heart = soaring beyond the present = freedom of dreams = = hard to keep eye on the future the verb not the object = could’ve = if not more so = of this moment = never understand = demonstrates what love is = to unbelievable to image = the mind at the speed of light = at it’s heart human life reaffirming = back to being human = without reflection = life of the living = not to say no trust and deception = get it = jungle of poverty = idealist = human suffering = deep dark mystery = spoken only in whispers or not at all = what its all about human interest man wins no war with nature = = under the dome = roof of the world = learn to listen = eyes that see the unseen = quietness = living = the jungle out lives man = of the jungle = cold hearted = legends of the jungle = c = wild honey dripping from a dream = man war with nature = in the face of life = nothing remains except the relics of the mind falling asleep = had i know then what i know now that is another story, wanted to get away from myself = running inside the mind = personality = last thing you remember = thats why i am here = shouldn’t be talking = don’t care about = don’t won’t to get involved = missed moments manny of best intentions are defeated = guise = couldn’t take it seriously = identify = hierarchy = identifying properly = defy it = denying = younger looking = broken hearts = eye to eye = betrayal = no defense = deranged = ability to excess = accountable = hall of pain = finest moment = suffered a wrong = eventual = might as well = has no business = all deny = who is responsible = shifting responsibility = controversial = striking back = no matter who throws the first punch = victims of = future of dying young = no more breath = subito = illusion of dying = sense of spirit leaving = last gasp of the future = in the course of = death is all of our deaths = gift of life = false hope = life taken away = a little bit more complicated = like a new life = reminisce = a box with a little piece of the past = brutal curtains = life unbearable = living in the dungeon of the mind = cold as if = haven’t been able to forget = in turmoil = maybe maybe not = not giving up on the rocks = have them all the time = images that resonate = have to see where it leads = great waste of time = go bye for the last time = adventures in the looking glass = don’t know what to say where is the revolution = play their way = timid = shaky = persistent and continuous ideological pattern = not with standing = there will be = question of what kind hold hands and jump over the edge = ideological disasters = the question is = do you believe = have their time = in public eye = only thing could do = in the long term = for lots of reasons = crime against nature = second coming see more = beyond words = pursuit of protection = increased dramatically = concerned with sense of memory = represented world through = outlining = lifting out the light = simple colors = come to me in my mind = painting from heart and mind = love of art = did not diminish the magnitude = ironically = philosophizing = pursuing = by the time = deeply ensconced = sense of family = virtuosity = stated simply = unthinking honesty = what knew best = constant source = harvested ideas = eye witness to the future = on the face of it = new definitions = principal areas of concern = set the tone meaningless unless you believe there is a place called history little to know attention = place in history = where = what = how = talk to soon = not on my mind = mind only thing available = realization is what we thought = started out as = went on to = could go on and on = outstanding thing = not bad = how do you respond to = different mind set = indeed it probably is = demagogue = message a plan = fluctuations = suppressed = less painful = what’s it about = who knows what’s right = riveting = make it work = the world has changed = not that simple = don’t know it catching up with the past = living proof = leaps and bounds = do you read me = hope survives = meet in better days = part of everything = whats the point = human stories = difficult time = whole other world = want to change the world = justice is not just = sometimes i watch = childhood without the child = no matter what you win or lose you still have everything = and life moves on = what have you done with your/my/our life = all’s well that ends well manifested frustration = that is probably true = much bigger than = moment in life = giving way to something else = need to understand that = referendum = before = because they believe = cooking up strategy = cannot succeed = can’t keep it place in the world = and that’s where we are going = circumstance = confronted personal dilemma = raised question = indicated = middle of fight = fight for approach = don’t have sense = as i have had chance = what about those people = misleading = charged = what there is = personal relationship = not happy with that outcome = destitute = escalated to new levels = in the final analysis = compassionate results = did you mislead or not not mistakes that were intended = during review process = no intent = central to that debate = come to grips = solving problems = who has the right answers = relocating to modern reservations = investment in life = right at the heart and later = back in a moment = head of = former = where did this idea come from = enhance voice = preference = in conjunction = with and the like = non binding = what ever impact that can have = much more than just a = casting = change the shape of things = moderating debate = the problem is that problems are not getting paid attention = objective = on agenda = turned away = low and behold = committed = willing to mouth = scared = painted as a place = what’s wrong = what’s right = what kind of issues = disrepair = born into despair = has to be addressee = and proudly so = hostile witness = missing from = analysis = mesmerized = other people = and all of that = original addict = hypnotizing = among other thing = who done it = everything in dispute = less significant = redirect examination = pointing out = no way = no opportunity = speaking of = does it matter = pays too much attention = dealing with facts as they are = = evidence is strong = high level of expectation = fascinating figure = did what needed to do = exasperated = more different = great moment = drifted along = virtually = full fledged = basically the point is = can not account for it = demeanor = shading or shadow every once and awhile = just seems perfect = extremely difficult memories = demarcation = significant things = according to = didn’t pay any attention = that is the question = hangs over not surfaced = cross examination = still missing = surprising = only anybody cares about = may have been but not a great = next big event = at the end of the beginning = hardly any who see analysis of it = where this is going = get away from issue = forfeit = concentrate = assigned to scene = a person who collects evidence = inexperience = attacked very heavily = believe to be in a certain place = not made clear = head out side = for why = not heard what happened = theory = dumped = combed fields = arguable = just don’t know = any surprises = never gave it = small surprises = don’t think think = moving into = that’s it = created a mirage = embodied = and probably = experience rather than representation = iconoclastic vigor = big generalization = held up the mirror = take it serious = what is that = driven it = what do you see and think = intensity and focus = oddest feeling = identical to what was = part of gift = energy that is startling = charged with = attention to detail = in own terms = try to be or do something = idiosyncratic = story line on the brink = treats = through the course of = fantasy is real = thought ;you would never asked = settling comfortable = nervous about what s going on = need to find out who you are = what your hopes and dreams are = lost along the way = thought you would never asked = what do you like sums up life = never thought to ask = to exciting to turn down = bottom line = to be = great dreams = all of the above = always believe = if anything can stop you than let it = to go out to great lengths say what = price have to pay = don’t know any other way to do = has to do with passion = never have settled = using it more = something that goes with = trying to do = what it’s unreal = it’s so unreal = kinder gentler softer = stop the music = determination = resolve = catapulted = overnight = fight for what believe in = takes a lot of guts = the point is = choosing the wrong choice = what is it = take a choice who knows where the magic comes from = what ever happened happened = historical myth = pantheon = denouement = not telling the whole truth is not lying = no time to be shocked by the truth = don’t know what you are talking about = don’t have the guts = = what’s the truth = had to move = wanted the reality = no not necessarily = predicted what is not happening now = i suppose = can you look back = can you imagine = some thing came along = whatever it might be = love the doing it = and what = one more time = work and love = are right there = don’t know what would do = have a hand = means something in the world = it true = responsibility of being a human being = don’t know if can ever stop = make a difference been around a little bit = gives us what we get = not embarrassed = past the prime = entrenched interest = stand in the way of = out lived uselessness = not your call = worked out = disagree = and so be it = think that’s fine = goes on and on = chastised = cast vote = all to soon = if they do = hard to tell = define issues = do real damage here = intransigence = leaving with head high = didn’t sell out = dead issue = need victims and villains = wither on the vine = what can a damage can it do = phenomenon = as it pertains = part of typhoon = two sides = hope in the end = look at the good and look at the bad being human = strange = is this a good sign = taking time off = the world caving in = truth of the matter is = know me better = it’s not about me = about life = compelling = afraid for you = not just any = acting like here = acting all the time = inspired = lost reality = abandonment of the mind/future = yesterdays today = breadline = beauty in ugliness = cruelty of poetry/truth = flashed before the soul/mind = playing with words = hearing my own voice = first impression = delicate matters = confronting sense something missing in the heart = last temptation = farther along than = plagued by disillusionment = blind rage = begin again = can’t take it = must move = piercing heart = as long as = ignorance = to say = close behind = where we live inside ourselves/myself growing away = inexplicably = sense of = share with you = sorrow = rampant = remnant = repelling = choking memories = scattered = haunting = screaming inside = take me not the future lost time = reflections = cried for lost = cried for us = nothing changes = thought of us = no sign of life = going some where = ahead of my time = time tracking = time ticking away = battered reality borrowed the future = never spoke = looking for vision = moving across the mind = echoing voices = fleeing the future = subtle = what’s it all over = impression = irrespective = suppressant = looking into the soul = never stopped dancing = primal scream = at the end of the world = miss my mind = social commentary = touch base goddess from the dead = haunted = considerable loss = persuaded = no one walks away from = but of course = loneliness = disingenuous = disinherited = hand washing life = hung out to dry ghostly = written in the book of the dead = up to something = weapon = anticipated = over and under = stumbling = broken brakes = living inside my head = mirages in the pitch black of = mythical characters harnessing = separatism = trapped = resulting = happenstance = thrown in the face of it = face it BACK from the DEAD things ON MY MIND = WHERE AND WHEN = maybe the time = YOU KNOW what = sit down and LET’S TALK = where = it’s NOT very CLEAR = about what = ENOUGH for NOW = back from the dead are we COMMUNICATING fill in the blanks = how to take it = all set up and no place to go = CALL IT A THEORY = better still call it off = better off in LONG RUN = did best i could = hope could do better = what DO YOU THINK = are we communicating TELL ME something don’t think so = TELL ME SOMETHING I DON’T KNOW = this is how you do things = enough = barking at the moon = long before = long after = where are we going = WATCH YOUR STEP = all aboard ABOUT TIME unsung = unsaid = unknown = wrong way of advice = leaning on = about time = ABOUT TO EXPIRE = run down = run away = alone = distinct = less well = stirred up = remain as you are = IN CASE OF EMERGENCY = FALLING OVER ONE anothers MIRAGES TURN IT AROUND not serious about this = how serious is this = short run = problem for = TURN IT AROUND = guess what = blinking light AHEAD = look out for THE IMAGINATION = how did it happen = HOPE IT HAPPENS TO YOU TOO GET IT now for SURE = stand aside = wait for turn = vengeance with a = appealing = either way = OUTLOOK = LOOK OUT = GOT IT = GET IT I BELIEVE YOU LIKE THE STARS = and believe you me = teach to live = strange way to do things = strayed away from beliefs = I BELIEVE YOU BELIEVE = wake UP FROM THE DREAM = far from home = visual cliche = listen = loud and clear = NOTHING MAYBE THERE NOT WITH STANDING catch up = all we have = NOTHING MORE OR LESS = nothing like it = nothing there = NOT WITH STANDING = in most cases = everything stops = intensive care = not worth talking about = WHAT ARE YOU talking ABOUT = FLOATING WORDS = in a stream of thoughts = SEEING IS UNBELIEVABLE = UNSIGHTLY TIRED OF BEING TIRED OF BEING = liberty and the PURSUIT OF HAPPINESS = BY THE MIND = loneliness = emptiness = success = hope = expectations = INTELLECTUAL MIRAGES = beauty/ugliness = romance = cars = cynicism = abuse = guilt = desire = pride = vanity = longing = emotions = sex = TORMENTED BY LIFE = LOOK IN THE MIRROR A TRAGIC HERO IN THE MIND A TRAGIC HERO = dramatic = we only see what we want to = couldn’t live together or apart = thrusting myself onto = tragic hero IN THE MIND FACING MYSELF FACING MYSELF = sharpening up = UNDER DONE = OVER SOLD = me/you/us = WALLOWING IN MISERY = over DRAMAtizing = absorbed = MYOPIC MIND = INVISIBLE PERSON CRUSADER make SPACE for the future = CRUSADER = do you believe IN THE FUTURE = united in division = OBVIOUSLY UNOBVIOUS = it is my UNDERSTANDing = all of this = one at a time = go BACK ALL OVER IT again = BELIEVE ME YOU = nobody wants to live it over = IF IN FACT IF IN FACT = on firm ground = QUICKSAND = unsound = those who say = way come about = on demand = blameless = out of main stream = not FORTHRIGHT = get up and SAY IT = TAKE A STAND led around BY THE NOSE LED AROUND BY THE NOSE = contrast = end of EXTREME = lost for other reasons = BELIEVE IT OR NOT = needle in haystack = IN SEARCH OF = what is it SHATTERED SYMBOLS – what harm could COME OUT OF IT could’ve been = KEEP IT to YOUR SELF = EXCUSE ME/YOU = closed out = WHAT HARM COULD COME OUT OF IT = CAUGHT in IT = ALLEGEDLY = supposedly = SHATTERED SYMBOLS WAIT AND SEE WAIT AND SEE = who feels like you/me/us = NOT THAT I KNOW = TO BE OR NOT TO BE = who cares = it’s all going to be OVER = SOONER OR LATER = something are best LEFT UNSAID = say it = strong case FOR AND AGAINST = affirming LIFE = TAKE IT OR LEAVE IT ON HOLD WAITING FOR LIFE made it = MAYBE = what are you = i told you = WE’RE WAITING FOR LIFE = it’s not coming = IT’S COMING = JUST A MOMENT PLEASE = BE RIGHT WITH YOU RING-A-LEVO MAN lets get out of here = have a lot of work to do = get to know yourself/myself = IF YOU QUALIFY = READY FOR YOU = READY OR NOT = RING-A-LEVO MAN HAD A GREAT FALL hide and SEEK = SEEKING = sure fire way = discover THE WONDERS = experience = REACH OUT and touch = don’t be left behind = the great fear = put it back together again = HAD A GREAT FALL = are you ok = come on in it’s only a game = IMAGINARY REMINDER = it won’t last as long as you think = GET IT BEFORE IT’S GONE OVERHEARD HIM SAYING TO MYSELF – FREE FREEDOM your IN MY OWN WAY he said to himself = is that the way = LET ME GO = don’t know where = the BEGINNING AND THE END OF TIME are = haven’t much time BEFORE LIFE RUNS OUT = i’m trying to think = something has gone WRONG WITH HUMANITY = to tell THE STORY = TRAGIC COMEDY = don’t like this = I’M SORRY FOR YOU/ME/US = nothing more we can do, can we = I DON’T LIKE THIS anymore than you = end of message = FREE FREEDOM = OVERHEARD HIM SAYING TO MYSELF COOKING = PRISONER OF THE MIND = OBLIVIOUS OF OBLIVION COOKING in my mind = uncooked IDEA = ingredients = PRISONER OF THE MIND = PROVOKING = shaking = invading the soul = emotional PAIN GOES DEEPer than = feeling sorry for your/my/our selves = collective unconscious = OBLIVIOUS OF OBLIVION = COOKING UP A STORM WRECKAGE OF HUMANITY BEGAN TO UNRAVEL YOU/ME/US OUT/IN show YOU/ME/US OUT/IN = around AND AROUND = dependent on independency = since the WRECKAGE OF HUMANITY BEGAN TO UNRAVEL = lost and FOUND = UNSEEN = i have TO TELL YOU something = you PERSONIFY ME/YOU/US = come on in and HAVE A SEAT = please TAKE YOUR TIME BURRIED DEEP INSIDE BURRIED DEEP INSIDE = eased the way = not DIFFICULT = let’s SEE IF = add a little more = smell the air = liquid MEMORY = voting on THE FUTURE = EVERY DECISION is a decision = at last SOME MADNESS = regardless of COLOR = colorBLIND = FALSE LABEL = BURRIED DEEP INSIDE MIND BLIND see it all BEFORE THE TRIP ENDS/BEGINS = in the mirror of the mind = MIND BLINDED BY ITSELF = LIFETIME IN A MOMENT = sun shining = MINDFUL = pleasure of light = too bright to see = INTRIGUING THE IMAGINATION PURELY REFERENTIAL PURELY REFERENTIAL = whatever that means = super IMPOSED IMPOSITION = lustrous gold = outer space = UNDERLYING = OUT LYING = LYING = BETRAYED AGAIN by you/me/us PURELY REFERENTIAL FLOATING ILLUSIONS PARADOXICALLY HAS IT’S REASONS PARADOXICALLY HAS IT’S REASONS = unreasonable = FLOATING ILLUSIONS = has to be = no feed = stone door = CAVITY Of the mind = NASTURTIUMS OF REDONS dream’s = it is simple = HEAD and long = THRUST INTO YOU/ME = TERRIFYING IMAGE = FUCKING THE HEARTOUT = irrelevant = IF IN FACT = IMPACT IS PURE ONLY DANGER = PEDALING BACKWARDS ONLY DANGER = PEDALING BACKWARDS = image of TERROR IN THE MIND = floating horror = sends us BACK INTO THE DARKNESS of the mind = unseen and unsung terror = REGURGITATING PAST THE GUARDS OF SANITY = forced out = ABANDONED THOUGHTS = on the edge = eyes closed = PEDALING BACKWARDS IN THE MIND THE OBVIOUS IS OBVIOUSLY SOCRATES SHADOW the TEMPTATION = SYMBOListic = on the OTHER HAND = a single line CAN CHANGE THE UNIVERSE = need more explanation = more of what = STAND TALL SIT QUIETLY = listen to THE SOUND BETWEEN THE SOUND = less and less = symbol of the UNSEEN TEMPTATION to discover the UNDISCOVERABLE = THE OBVIOUS IS OBVIOUSLY SOCRATES SHADOW SEEN INSIDE OUT MUTANT imagination = symbol of symbols = SEEN INSIDE OUT = indeed = undone = REMAINING INDIFFERENT is the problem = stoned WALL OF THE MIND = SEE PAST THE MIND AND INTO THE EYE OF IMAGINATION HALF VEILED AND HALF REVEALED HALF VEILED AND HALF REVEALED = story UNTOLD = BURSTING INSIDE every one = unsung = disappearing into = snap shot of = A PART OF ME AND YOU/US REVEAL US TO OURSELVES intensity = LIFE ITSELF = BEtween EXTREME = made ALL THE MORE/LESS = REVEAL US TO OURSELVES = disturbing = PASSIONATE = sMOTHERING = sMOLDERING = PERPETUALLY INNOCENT HUMANITY INHUMANE VULNERABLE = where BEGINS AND ENDS = no beginning and end = with INNERMOST AND OUTER MOST = out no where = LONGING FOR = HUMANITY INHUMANE = minded = aspects = one’s one = diversity = strength/weakness = recorded time = UNRECORDED = re-made = EVASIVE = METAPHOR for = separateness = NEVER THE LESS/MORE = AND FURTHERMORE MORE FILLED WITH MELANCHOLY colors of blood and bile = plump jowls = FILLED WITH MELANCHOLY = frustrated = bleakness = hunger within = beating = bearing = might WELL BE = pronouncement = justify = narrative YOU/ME/US THINK SO tulles = cleverly = REALIGNMENT = snow falling = during the summer RAIN = YOU/ME/US THINK SO = what is tulles = let me KNOW WHEN you find out IN THE MIRROR OF THE MIND memory starring at my/you/ourselves IN THE MIRROR OF THE MIND = stop = HEAD IN HAND = speak to me = out of the DARKNESS into the frame = into THE FUTURE = would IT BE another way = putting it IN IS WAY= contemplate = contemptuous = attention PERCEPTION DEFICIT = undefined = inspiration and yet we LIVE ON AND ALONE = precious LITTLE MINDS = DANCING WITH OLD MEMORIES ACERBIC OR ACERBATE short term = BOUND AROUND = everyone has problems = difficult to tolerate = ACERBIC = ACERBATE = bureaucracy = increase demand = what DO YOU think you’d be doing if you WEREN’T HERE = part of your life = ONE MORE TIME FAR CRY ALL OR NOTHING = r = part of your life = we MUST ASK THE QUESTION = ciVILITY of death = frail = fall apart = to lure the HEART/MIND = FAR CRY = logical time = send my regards DISTINGUISH YOURSELF DISTINGUISH YOURSELF = remember = witness = elegant = compounded = childhood memories = toys = tops of field = too sophisticated = field of flower = lighter THAN AIR – WORK IN PROGRESS = INDISTINGUISHABLE REMEMBER YOUR FUTURE fed them all = protect the living = REMEMBER YOUR FUTURE = mindful = without BEING AWARE = trigger = STEPPED INTO THE UNCONSCIOUS FUTURE = BORN INTO/OUT = LIFE CHANGING FORM OUT OF LIFE OUT OF LIFE = MISSING IN ACTION = lingering = once beating as one = now unbeaten = heartless = LIFE INSURANCE OUT OF TIME = OUT OUT DAM SPOT THAN WHO WILL IF WE DON’T speak = THAN WHO WILL = better them then ME = WHAT do you say = KNOW ANYTHING TRUTH IS A LIE = NOT NECESSARILY TRUE it isn’t NOT NECESSARILY TRUE = what’s true ? = untrue = TRUTH IS A LIE = nothing there = can’t stand for this =I’LL TELL YOU NO = stand up = sit down = never ending = never you mind = GRIEVING FOR MY/YOU/OUR SELVES AMBUSHED BY LONELINESS AMBUSHED BY LONELINESS = trapped inside the TOMB OF THE MIND = explain the unexplainable = collective UNCONSCIOUS = consequence = LOVE AN ESCAPE from loneliness = UNESCAPABLE = separated from myself in search of the ME IN YOU = child with eyes open SEARCHING FOR HUMANITY = lost in a see of humanity = you see= AMBUSHED BY LONELINESS ONE OTHER THING there is ONE OTHER THING = putting a face on = need to get approval to live = MAY I = simple SIMON SAYS = that’s RIDICULOUS = controversial = OUR FEARLESS LEADER = SIMPLE Simon says LIFE AS THOUGHT someone PLEASE = show me/you/us the = get their attention = inattentive = inseparableness = inspirational surge = never the less = willing to assume = the DESCARTES mechanical image of THOUGHT AS LIFE and LIFE AS THOUGHT = there for i am = i think i think = POOR GODEL THOUGH HIMSELF THUNK in a slunk and CHAOS FOLLOWED SUIT AND SUNK A DERIVATIVE BEFORE IT FLOATED IN/OUT TIME = ALL THINGS ARE CLEARLY UNCLEAR = don’t you agree = OBVIOUSLY UNOBVIOUS SOMETHING WORSE THAN WORSE BEYOND BELIEF = SOMETHING WORSE THAN WORSE = can’t live with it = the unknown BEYOND KNOWING = knew to much = HISTORY OF THE UNKNOWN = what is going on = AGAINST ALL REASON AGAINST ALL REASON = unreasonable = reasoning = the UNSEEN = UNSAID = UNHEARD = UNDEAD = excuse me = can’t do that = get over it = beyond the call = relevant evidence = exposure = compassion goes out = not a proven case = REASON IS UNREASONABLE FALLING INTO A DOGMA FALLING INTO A DOGMA = leading to a DEAD END = not the typical PARADIGM CONCEPT OF MASCULINITY/FEMININITY = i’ve got to leave STRANGE BEHAVIOR MAY NOT BE WHAT = legitimate = not in habit = haphazard = big event = by every account = NEVER BE PROVEn = sounds good = in this situation i would jump = unduly SUSPECTED = IRRESPECTIVE = STRANGE BEHAVIOR = seems to be what WHY IS WHY GO BEYOND = still doesn’t make any = explain why = WHY IS WHY = REALITY BELIEVES IN ITSELF = not only on/off the tract but = ON THE BRINK OF EXTINCTION = GOOD NIGHT BACK PEDDLING INTO THE FUTURE JUGGLING THE UNIVERSE = soul sculpture = enlarged = WHOLE OF CREATIVITY = top secret = all terms are the same = can’t hit back = BACK PEDDLING INTO THE FUTURE BUT WHEN AND IF SCARES THE HELL OUT OF ME = BUT WHEN AND IF = enough is enough = such a degree of = on the other hand = who am i/you/we = aRE WE A WE = YOU A YOU = ME A ME = UNDISCLOSED = consider this = UP FOR GRABS = NO ANSWER TIME TO SPARE all apart of the ocean = reflections = AT THAT MOMENT = willful determination = able to continue = bet on it = make the most of it = TIME TO SPARE HOLD ON TO THIS holding out for out = holding in for in = HOLD ON TO THIS = unimaginable = speculation = some see = about that time = could have been = begin to take place arounD THE WORLD = added attraction = let me know when it happens HOLD ON TO THAT THOUGHT HOLD ON TO THAT THOUGHT = reason so ever = reconnected = wish i could have = couldn’t look at it = UNLOOKABLE = never stopped = didn’t have to take it = THE INVISIBLE YOU/ME/US FED UP WITH DOWN HOLDING PATTERN = dangerous progression = cut it loose = FED UP WITH DOWN = unified field = where am i = IF YOU ONLY KNEW ABILITY TO SAY THE UNSAID can’t do it deliberately = thanks a lot = wide variety = force of = innate = repertoire of dreams = NEVER ASKED AND NEVER WILL = RETENTION OF WHAT WAS ONCE = REARED HEAD AND SPIT = signals = you MAY BE able to = infinite number = ABILITY TO SAY THE UNSAID = STEP BY STEP YOU’D BE AMAZED = not two things are more ALIKE AND DIFFERENT AT THE SAME TIME = one might ASK WHY = why = perfectly clear = hand free = WALKING A TIGHT ROPE = a syllable = vowels CARRY THE SOUND = never the less = out put = put out = life behind = get CARRIED AWAY = STEP BY STEP COUNT ME OUT WORDS DO NOT COUNT = counting on = COUNT ME OUT = accounting = accountable = how will you die IN SUNLIGHT OR DARKNESS FIGHT FIRE WITH FIRE FIGHT FIRE WITH FIRE = jumping through the fire = scattered with the wind = NO NEXT TIME = no time = we come and go = old and tarnished = keep your sense of humor = waiting = jumbled up thinking = UNDER FIRE EXCUSE ME = EXCUSE YOURSELF SAVE YOURSELF FROM YOURSELF = SAVE ME FROM MYSELF = EXCUSE ME = EXCUSE YOURSELF = DRAGGING MIND THROUGH THE MUD = think about that = i know what i had to do = DON’T THINK straight = it’s been a long time JUST A FEW WORDS JUST A FEW WORDS = begin = begging for life = way of life = COULDN’T BE HELPED ALL THAT’S GONE BUT NOT FORGOTTEN ALL THAT’S GONE BUT NOT FORGOTTEN = powerless = primary concern = BEFORE AND AFTER = inadequate = hearing worries = waste not want not = NOTHING TO BE AFRAID OF = SIGNIFYING NOTHING DON’T FIGHT IT DON’T FIGHT IT = absorbed mind = what a world = TO BAD IT DIDN’T LAST = no emotion = full of grace = HAD NO IDEA = never known = THE AUDACITY WHY DID YOU SAY NOTHING = WHY NOT 1,000 APOLOGIES = few exceptions = few who succeed = lovers who hate = salvation = propose a toast = WHY DID YOU SAY NOTHING = WHY NOT CATCH UP TO THE FUTURE CATCH UP TO THE FUTURE = finding out about it = discrimination = get down to business = don’t stop the flow = inspiring = listening = BRING IT BACK = FROM THE EDGE OF TIME = didn’t know THE FUTURE OF THE FUTURE WAS ENDANGERED = let it pass = BEYOND RECOGNITION = LIVING LEGEND STARVING SELF STARVING SELF = take a deep breath = one more time = NOTHING SERIOUS = BE RIGHT BACK = on his way = a little OUT OF IT = DON’T EVEN START = where are you going = SHOCKING OUTRAGE = depraved = willful = went and see = GET THAT = not such a great idea RISE UP RISE UP other THINGS HAPPENED = that it occurred IS WELL KNOWN = revolves around sun = emotion = shown own your face = put you into = or not = on a roll = WITHOUT WORDS = concentrate = FACE IN A CROWD = how sweet it is = more than one thing at a time = RISE UP RISE UP = cast down PROJECTING PROJECTING = where else CAN WE DO IT = LET OUT OF HERE = accesses depression = how long PRETEND NOT HERE = would you rather = just want to leave = get over it = think real important = what if = anything thats true = and then what happened = don’t remember = NOT FACING EACH OTHER = standing side by side = style = SAY WHAT YOU/I/WE MEAN = a judgment call = know what look like = MADE A FOOL OF LIFE SIDEWAYS THROUGH LIFE SIDEWAYS THROUGH LIFE = don’t give hard time = take statement = just left = ARE WE PRETENDING = doesn’t like to be REMINDED = USE SOME IMAGINATION WHO KNOWS WHO KNOWS about this = don’t mean anything at all = message = universal = evolved = DON’T I EVEN KNOW = gesture of speech = instantaneous = HARD TO LOSE = use to it = got most of what you want = hurts more = HARD SHELL = DON’T LET ANYONE IN = YOU HEAR ME WOULDN’T WORRY WOULDN’T WORRY about it = give me a hand with this = don’t know where to go = doesn’t BELIEVE ME = LIFE FALLING APART = harder = have to finish this = they come BACK TO HAUNT YOU WORDS AFTER WORDS WORDS AFTER WORDS = not there = PUT TWO AND TWO TOGETHER = exchange = and then = storage = coordinated DANCE = that’s that = end of that = SECRET WORD NEVER BEFORE SEEN NEVER BEFORE SEEN = WORK IT ON OUT = innateness = important maybe = intimate = reinforced = NOSE IS CRYING = oh well = DON’T SEEM TO LEARN = ignore = DOESN’T MATTER = playing language game = IT HAS BEEN THOUGHT = SEEMS TO INCLUDE = comes = NOT EASY RHETORIC AND REALITY different spin = unconsciously = misunderstand = much of what you know = environment has effect = experience is relevant = think a little different = RHETORIC AND REALITY = HOW COULD IT BE done HAVE A LOOK HAVE A LOOK = extended scenario = coming to LIGHT = SOUNDS GOOD = don’t have the votes = THE TRUTH IS HAVE A LOOK = REALITY CATCHES UP WITH RHETORIC HUMBLE BEGINNING BACKING OFF = too extreme = ROGUE THOUGHT = have a look = bright light = space = questionable = cringe = HUMBLE BEGINNING = embarrassing = a stir = outer space = REALLY DON’T KNOW GREAT MYSTERY – NOT LEARNING TO FLY GREAT MYSTERY = influencing thoughts = NOT LEARNING TO FLY = open question = controversy = STILL IN DENIAL = appears to arrive = and the like = built in = exposure = why can’t this be = surrender = DON’T SEE IT THAT WAY = WHY MORE THAN WE THINK MORE THAN WE THINK = lean but not mean = what believe in = hurt real bad = spectacle = NO THING TO SAY = second chance = SUBJECT = STONEWALLED FROM THINKING = not very popular ALMOST IRRELEVANT ALMOST IRRELEVANT = don’t know what message is = treasure = for always = gutting = where off to = AVERAGE PERSON = against = reinvented = IN NO POSITION = not your concern = NOBODY KNOWS NOTHING IN A CLOUD OF DUST IN A CLOUD OF DUST = TRUTH OF MATTER = never learned = what coming HERE = SOMETHING TO THINK ABOUT DEVOUR IT ON YOUR WAY = put a SMILE on you face = have you had = what do you need = have one of these = SOMETHING DIFFERENT = quite frankly = new ideas = spread it = DEVOUR IT WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR BE CERTAIN = UNCERTAIN TO BE = FUTURE = that is = serious problem = scaring FEAR = far more EXTREME = rely on = next here = depends on = WHY DIDN’T I/YOU/WE = ARE YOU/I/WE ? = it would have been, HAD IT BEEN = WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR YOU MAY NEED THIS YOU MAY NEED THIS = out of control = OBVIOUSLY NOT = WHO done this = doesn’t look good = where IS THE FUTURE OVER = indebted = to good conscious = complicity = came forward = disappeared = heard from a number of = knowledge = SAY WHAT = foolish = protest = TALK TO MUCH = to busy to TALK TO YOU/ME/US REVEAL THE TRUTH HOW DO YOU EXPLAIN = in world in which live = REVEAL THE TRUTH = in minds = compromise = loyalty = bad choice = responsibility = what is reaction = SEEN FROM THE MOUNTAIN TOPS = ON MY SHOULDER = FOUNDING ME/YOU/US FAILED TO SPEAK IT FAILED TO SPEAK IT = KNOWING THE TRUTH = conclusion = not have knowledge = DID NOT DENY = hurting the good name = out side of = where should lie = FORGET THINKING = obligation to come forward = potentially = CONSPIRACY NOT OF GREAT CONSEQUENCE WHAT DO WE MEAN BY = receiving = ANYTHING WRONG with that on its face = generally ACROSS the board = INEVITABLY = argument in this case = who won or lost is NOT OF GREAT CONSEQUENCE = embarrassing situation = independence = classic example ISOLATED INCIDENT ISOLATED INCIDENT = acquired otherwise = ENDEMIC = PATTERN seen = disturbed about = does not TAKE AWAY THE FACT = WHATEVER THAT MEANS = should get = NO STAKES IN OWN MIND IN OWN MIND = committing = LOST UPON THE MIND = believing = BEWILDERING = wake up ONE MORNING = MIGHT NOT = what’s going on = would that MAKE A DIFFERENCE NEEDED TO LEARN something we NEEDED TO LEARN = not responded = taking a DIM VIEW of all of this = real EVIDENCE = BECAME EVIDENT = interrogated = NOTHING TO APOLOGIZE FOR = didn’t ask = mislead = about knowledge LOOKED IN THE EYE LOOKED IN THE EYE = STOP AT THE END of day = talk about NEW HONESTY = life and death and = criticize = that’s WHY ARE WE ALL HERE = courtesy = AND AFTER ALL THAT NIGHT AND DAY what has learned = BACK IN A MOMENT = document allegation = camped out = HUNGER STRIKE = not been hear from since = REFUSE TO admit = WHAT GOES ON HERE = here NIGHT AND DAY = only to use = do anything to try and prevent that = thats what happens = SELF TORTURE OF THE MIND = KNOW WHAT I MEAN THE POINT IS POINTLESS or STRAIGHT FOR THE HEART STRAIGHT FOR THE HEART = system = HAND IN GLOVE = don’t want change = TERROR INSTRUMENT of repression = WORTH MORE OR LESS THAN NOTHING = THE whole POINT = BEYOND ALL OF THIS = fled from = UNASSUMING = own the shirt on their back = haven’t forgotten = I DON’T KNOW = POINTLESS PROMISSES ANESTHETIZED SELF EYE WITNESS IN GRIZZLE BUSINESS = terrified = how do you prepare self = ANESTHETIZED SELF = why wasn’t it = NO MATTER WHAT = FOR A REALITY THAT DOESN’T EXIST HERE RIGHTFUL SO RIGHTFUL SO = have to SAY ABOUT ALL OF THIS = no information = covering up = over and over = pressure to respond = SUFFERED AT THE HAND = PANIC STRICKEN = ANNOUNCED IMPRISONED = IMPLICATIONS IMPRISONED = IMPLICATIONS = tell about the man = ASSUMPTION WAS = panicked = NEVER SPOKE = nothing didn’t know = A GOOD QUESTION = all a HOAX = don’t care what says = basically = SOME MUCH FOR JUSTICE = getting A WAY WITH MURDER = wiped OFF THE MAP TIP OF ICEBERG KNOW AS MUCH AS YOU can = what we know = indicate = are we looking at TIP OF ICEBERG = EXPECT TO UNCOVER = NO DOUBT = all over = intensive = INTERRELATIONSHIPS = no evidence = KEY TO THE DOOR = DECENCY OF TRUTH WONDERING IF WONDERING IF = assume = would expect to do that = believe doing = had TO KNOW ABOUT it = CANNOT SET FOOT IN = communicated at all = better not come back = NOT PLAN TO SAY ANYTHING WHY NOT CAN’T LET THAT HAPPEN = part of the problem = WHY NOT = can’t find = do you have evidence = WHO IS THE THEY = spoke directly = get facts together = VERY DIFFICULT LIFE = DECENT KIND = the LEAST I CAN do = did it make any difference = influence = NOT THE CONSEQUENCE PROPAGANDA can confirm = PROPAGANDA stunt = have NO FURTHER INFORMATION after that = in addition = uproar = have a lot to do = not heard from = condolences = ONLY HEARD INDIRECTLY SPECULATION COULDN’T FIND ALIVE = to have the STRENGTH = renewed effort to continue = maintain feeling = SPECULATION = LEADING SUSPECT = maybe that = SPARKED TO = WALK THE STREET = DAILY LIFE back to normal = RELIEVE FEARS BREAKING STORY BREAKING STORY = hunting poetry = short life = doomed from the start = hyphenated roots = contribution = imitation = stereotypes = RHYTHM PAINTING RHYTHM PAINTING = hostage of creativity = in EYE OF BEHOLDER = more than what APPEARS TO BE = being perceived = DECOMPOSITION ON SURFACE DISMISS DISMISS = sensational STORY = SYMPATHETIC = mending = another audience = ANXIETY LEVEL = DREADFULNESS = independence = above all = DON’T GO TO FAR = hearing hell = SHATTERED ILLUSION SHATTERED ILLUSION = helpless = without FEAR OR SHAME = build tomorrow = UN AND OUT DATED = imPOSSIBLE TO SAY ONCE CONCEIVED ONCE CONCEIVED = on top of mountain = EQUALLY FALSE = no desire = PERILOUS = EYE of vulture = MINING THE PAST = with caution = FORESIGHT = DICTATES heritage = judgment as individual = UNSPOKEN = encourage = look CARE fully = BECOMING = CAVE WAY = element = HARD TO LOSE sight GENRE OF EVERYDAY LIFE social QUESTION = ordinary people = GENRE OF EVERYDAY LIFE = not able to MOURN = protecting INNOCENCE = meaningless = fresh meat = a NEW = IDENTITY = BEYOND question = BOTTOM LESS PIT BLACKNESS OF NIGHT BLACKNESS OF NIGHT = overwhelm = can DREAM OF NOTHING = sense of the UNCANNY = ALIVE AND DEAD = NOBODY dominate = IMAGINATION OF THE PUBLIC = recently asked = believe that = from FIGHT TO FIGHT = less intensity = that is THE QUESTION LEND SELF TO losing MOTIVATION = IN THIS FIELD = dominant figure = ANALYZING question = when to get up when to GO TO BED = LEND SELF TO = get it BACK NOW READING TEA LEAVES prepared self = prove to world = READING TEA LEAVES = not going to be easy = head start = to RECAPTURE LIFE = can that be TRANSLATED UP FOR BID comes BACK WITH PERSPECTIVE = did right = did wrong = smarter OUTSIDE OR IN = UP FOR BID = don’t buy notion = talk about = things HAPPENING IN LIFE = STATE in GET A CHANCE GET A CHANCE to tell = rejuvenated = who’s listening to = WOULD IT NOT = WISH WELL = ultimate = POSITION SELF = VISITING QUIETLY = to the point where = probably GOING BACK GROWING INTO GROWING INTO = as we know today = wants to be = BEHIND DOOR NUMBER ONE = brand new = know what’s AHEAD = like to be in = bound = looks UP TO = good at what he does TALK ONE END OF SPECTRUM TO THE OTHER THATS BEHIND = and not only = TALK ONE END OF SPECTRUM TO THE OTHER = analogy that PLAYS OUT = not the greatest friends = has to DECIDE = cheap shot = ENDED UP ENDED UP the way = influence = not produce positive = during years = DOESN’T STOP there = didn’t CONCERN SELF = well MEANING QUITE HONESTLY during the time = surface = EMBARRASSED TO = sense of loyalty = BETTER JUDGMENT = likely to PREVAIL = NOT MUCH TO SAY = came to a head = not GOOD DIRECTION = ON MY VIEW POINT = responsible for self = own person = HONEST DIRECTION = not my way = don’t BELIEVE IN that = QUITE HONESTLY MEANINGFUL LIFE lot younger = MORE FLEXIBLE = PEOPLE of the faith = every man MUST BE accountable for what = great IMPACT ON = big fury = separate = MEANINGFUL LIFE = PREPARE YOURSELF laid out a scenario = PREPARE YOURSELF = greatest risk = MYSTERY COMING OFF = imagination AT PEAK = weigh in = getting chance to GET FEET UNDER = enough HEAVY WEIGHTS = WHAT’S HAPPENING with SHAKE SPEARING SHAKE SPEARING rolls = IMAGINARY IMAGES = resounding enthusiasm = what DOES IT SAY = MADE IN HEAVEN = irony = wit = part of the story = selling ON THE IDEA = interesting JUXTAPOSITIONS = not confident = not right at all = let MYSTIC COME THROUGH = strangely enough = first of all = working out = LET IT BE = or what = had just been in = impressed = GOES ON THERE = allowed to make = MUST SAY TO HEAVY = FRAGILE STUFF LOOK AT LIFE = TO HEAVY = FRAGILE STUFF = quick entrance = what ARE PEOPLE SAYING = which did you prefer = interesting enough = ART IMITATED LIFE = LIFE IMITATED ART = knows INSTINCTIVEly = HOW TO BE A WOMAN/MAN = reflection of private life = EXTRAORDINARY transformation = THERE IT IS THERE IT IS = back to original QUESTION = people are HUNGRY FOR SOMETHING = also about LIFE/LOVE = curious and strangeness of life = dealt in obsession = IN AN OTHER WAY = HEART BREAKING = WHY IS IT – WHY IS IT WHY IS IT = apathetic to the soul = food for the soul = MEAN SOMETHING = since the beginning = DANCE WITH MEANING = obscure = see what happens = no documented evidence = IS THAT RIGHT = can you wait = LOOK FORWARD TO see UNBELIEVABLE CROSS the SPECTRUMS = UNBELIEVABLE = cannot disappear = tend = CREATING FALSE documents = POTENTIAL = it is as though = STOLE IT FROM you/they/us BY SO DOING = BY NO OTHER METHOD BY SO DOING = BY NO OTHER METHOD = defacto presence = overwhelmend = CAN’T GET AT IT = learn = forced to learn = bankrupt = MASSIVE SCALE = can’t sustain = NEVER BEFORE = cultural = that’s a problem = guess what = not get done = have tried with EVERY MEANS POSSIBLE = so NEAR TO EACH OTHER SHELL OF SILENCE WHY WE SHOULD CARE = undiluted = tells A STORY = wonderful idea = MAJESTIC = dramatic range = unlikely PREMISE = combined talents = SHELL OF SILENCE BOARDING ON CHAOS BOARDING ON CHAOS = in the middle OF NOWHERE = every single one = substance GONE = well what DO YOU KNOW = made an agreement = IN CASE YOU HADN’T HEARD = ON THE OUTSKIRTS do you HEAR IT = LOOK FOR IT somewhere else = why stayed = ON THE OUTSKIRTS = seeing lesson = FREED SOMETHING to offer = reassuring = proud culture = SYSTEM COLLAPSING = where going = MAKING A NAME IN THE SAND OVER BEFORE YOU KNOW IT = PAINLESS the name to know = this Monday = significantly REDUCING = PAINLESS = it’s back = LEGENDARY = in value = no charge = great deal of = OVER BEFORE YOU KNOW IT = IT’S A GOOD THING VERY LITTLE IS WHAT IT SEEMS VERY LITTLE IS WHAT IT SEEMS = all but meaningless = part of an old tradition = looking for = RARELY FIND troubled = things GETTING WORSE = get through the week = dropped = CAN’T STAND IT ANYMORE = UNBEARABLE REFUGEE FROM LIFE MANAGEABLE ANGER = some way = urban sprawl = REFUGEE FROM LIFE = ACCIDENT WAITING to happen = fashionable = and then = national AN ANATHEMA = tide along = nervous BREAKDOWN = pulled out = CLOBBERED = on credit = going under = use VERY EASILY CRISIS IN VALUES = LEADING INTELLECTUALS CRISIS IN VALUES = LEADING INTELLECTUALS = mounting pressure = in truth = enough HYPOCRISY TO GO around = CLOSING THOUGHT HABIT FORMING feel better = insomnia = not HABIT FORMING = isn’t safe = sleeper = TRUSTING VOICE = beating the drum = there is a UNREASON ABLE = images SEIZED INTENTION = inevitable use = consider = LIKE IT OR NOT WE BETTER CARE = NOT GOOD for you/me/us = UNREASONABLE REASON = REASON TO REASONABLE carry on = in the pipeline = even if it’s true = what can you do = change of policy = life threatening = life treated unfairly = didn’t respond at all = trespassers = useful = still hear it = carry with you = hold on = carry on reckless endangerment = take care of it = under fire = not want to talk = have to talk = testifying = aware = know nothing about = as i would do = influenced by = influencing = pressured = paid price = passed over = fear of retribution = trying to determine = trying to = at this point in time = no evidence = brewing = bottled = into the core = written around = color blind = fair shot = preference = disintegrations = in fact = they say imbeded in culture = profound = green peace on the moon = look at this picture = anything wrong with this picture = with you = can’t talk = virtually identical = don’t at all look like = homeless people who = you want to find = far out earn = over a life time = voluntarily involuntary = chances are = ignorant about = naive = can’t find it = to our horrors = reality pressing in = life in/out of time job getting in way of life = next best thing = make an appointment to live = next life time = no matter who = spotless = living on = braved the test of time let’s see = better hurry up and see = see for your self = unseen = before the light = whatever you need = don’t tell me everything = empty hearted = sounds right to me = feel like your alone = well = frustrated = hungry = feel everything = no matter how long = will power = will return = return of will = looking for better way = no turning back yesterdays news = lots of things = playthings = along for = looking for what = none of it makes any sense reservations = reser-erection = silly = sleep little baby = created by = leaves you = before you = amazing = didn’t stop you = never happened = didn’t happen = didn’t stop = can’t get out of my own way = get out of here = get handle on it = touched = in a far better place a mouthful = by the way = advocating = what can we say = say what coming out of = not enough = number one reason = what are you saying = appear to be the case = don’t forget = forget it = respect = expect = change your/my/our mind = mindless = hard to know = pay attention = before it’s too late = significant = issue/is you = break out = anytime = doesn’t support itself = how do you do = doesn’t support conclusion = how do you move through = emphasizing = so i leave with this question = having said that = out there saying = in contrast = break through = broadening = encompassing = steadfast = throwing over board = advocating = diverse voices = message contradicts the message = reaching for the end of time inconsistently consistent = litmus paper test of the mind = principal support = limited edition = limited perspective = wide arrange = un range = un reasonable reads like a novel = remarkable story = where are we going = path of no return = over whelmed = reader = social structure = take a stand = sit down = changing lives = who cares no doubt = interim = concept of it = powerful idea = not tangible = find way = stress points = Orwellian world = shattered = switch = speak to this = anybody notice = obsessive = difficulty = ironic = global standard = seeds of revolution = getting up = hands down = have to look at it = try to make sense of this maybe it’s the way i see it = road from no where to nowhere = we’ve come a long way baby = don’t be bothered = run for your life = just wondering = run of the place = carrying imaginary cross a grip on yourself = out there is = full them up = liquidate = don’t hold back = don’t miss it = fit almost anybody = one size fits all = back tomorrow = just about anywhere = nothing to find out get a head = keep going nowhere = now remember = forget it = best way out = how about you = heard about it = projection = if it isn’t = then it is i’ll be there = in a big way = big picture = central theme = abandoned = so much for that has to go deeper = so much to be done = what thinkin the end = where do you expect it = understand yourself = how you are perceived stunning = slippery mind = slipping my mind = collective memory = descendants = preserve = real thing baby = dream come true = my life is my life = i give to you what was given to me = are we extinct yet = seen enough = going on living = prospect = there is no shelter from the subconscious = watch your step my life before me/you/us = getting over my head = going in the unknown = need t o love/ be loved = needs to be said = are you listening = hidden inside/out = i said to myself what a wonderful world it could be = who said that = wakeless = rebounding = boundless = slowing down = up we go = watch your head = yield = since the beginning of time = in the end = falling asleep = buying into it = demand speculation = early decline = less attractive = against = up to you if you want talk post mortem = look at it this way = don’t look = catastrophe = right direction = putting together = reasons to hope = services = rendered = doesn’t come free = conscious be your guide = consciously unconscious = ever before = before before = never again = again and again = concern is growing = wavering = austerity = rise to the occasion = bolster = intervention = back track = in custody = reads like real life = episode = melodrama = hypertension = unrealistic = that’s what happens = unlikely = emergency department to inside = wishing = writing a drama = living = pushing up and down = profile = hard pressed = world about to = when speaks = i support = i suspect = unsuspecting = at the heart of it = face lift = circumstantial life = evidence of a crime = unlikely story in order to order = brilliant = additional = speak to = and soon you want have = marketing hook = of course you should = inside out = listen to = share didn’t see a thing = what if didn’t make it = no way of controlling = may never see again = don’t get lost = that was close = have it examined = nothing quiet like it = could almost couldn’t make it = worry about it later catch a cab = never do that again = to tell you the truth = exploring other worlds = be grateful = wonder why = unforeseen = want you back = long distance to the = identify = in violation = doesn’t sound right = friends = purged from = underground = as we speak = matter of time = wiped from the face = never made it = what’s in him = gives it to = another audience inside = why do you say = above all = sense of = heavens and earth = hearken = observe = can tell you whole story = impossible to say = once conceived = haunted = resembling a vulture = blood rang cold = by degrees = rid self = though more deeply = wanted to think = mad men know nothing = should have seen = caution = foresight art of silence = barely moving = happens swiftly = at an early age = surrounded by = seemed to explain a lot of thing isn’t really dead = dying may be impossible = different ways = never writes = beyond question = to the bottom of mortality silence that overwhelms = can dream of nothing less = living in hell = lies behind reality = profound sense of the uncanny = alive and dead at same time = nothing stay hurried = on the banks = gift for language = with drew from = not a particle = worsened = battled over = had ever known = endeavored to be = not treated like you = never forgot it = refused = set out = to be clearly = wrote lots of lots = everybody loved it = to meet the raven = on demand = weak and weary = suddenly = as if someone = only this and nothing more = bleak December = wished tomorrow = face of sorrow = tangled named = forever more dawning = easily circulated = not changed in any profound changes = replacing = produced = sickly by the pen = perhaps = decision = by which i mean = steady lasting effect = longest stay = restless = not know = from beginning to end = savage = put it down = no uncertain terms = accessories without = triviality forgotten = except by the writer = whether = classic outsider = drifter = but still = doesn’t survive = was to = took into = through out life = i do take thee to be = cared for = managed to provide = object of = no one in lives = orphans in a storm stumbling through existence = needless to say = sense of reality off balanced = grotesque = by fits = awake at last = scribbling all day = for most of = wide array = struck by imagination = identifying = with idea = just returned from imagination = thrill, chill = not uplifted to madness = by hand of = demoniacal = real fears = being buried a live = terror of the mind = preconceived = heightened fiction a large part of = not getting lost = unity of = what’s essential confounded and amazed = natural consequences = descended = emotional intensity = mourning never seems to come = evoking terror = fall of the house = automaton of the year = and at length = drew on = a lot of room to work with = content = complete story = emphasizing the bizarre = it’s all crazy but it’s hard not to believe = disarming the mind = doesn’t seem to hold up very well not kind of people = not in ordinary sense = RESTING = freedom from content = so bizarre and appealing = ventured upon = so well know = this was the point = precluded = with impunity = by word or deed = continued = proceed = at the fault = a weak point = even feared = prided self = have my doubt = in the middle = without consulting you = fearful of losing = almost satisfied = on the way = some fools will have it let us be gone = for the love of = working on you all the time terrorist of the imagination = indistinct = take away from = do anything = a physical treaty = even invented = memorable = unsolvable mysteries = in fact = one of the first stories translated = in large measure = baudilair = also responsible = misreading = apart of = nothing more misleading = often = bear any resemblance = if we had a chance = great favorite = got hold of = wan wanted to = creeping out of = couldn’t imagine = any hope of = destabilized = anchor = once lost that was lost = maybe you may know = by me = in this kingdom by the sea = haywire = at the least = very difficult = strange work = now destitute = inaccessibility = part of attraction = all through life = fear of life unwinding = to raise = put self = infinitely more = despite = boarded = don’t know what happened = counts available = lasted a few days = brain fever = by the age = danger past = over at last fever called leaving in habit call living prepared for a long time = for such = you will be astonished = startle many = by reputation = few or no friends = slanderous = seem = cursing at the skies = built on real drama = did not asses = haunting = gifted with life squandered = couldn’t get it together well of course that makes it understandable = not seen what others see or saw = awaken heart = loved alone = ahead of time = read and reread = can’t get away from quite pitiful = the stories are there = and always there = didn’t want to say anything = pathetic = got that = don’t want to see you = hope you don’t get mad = not up to it today = didn’t think you’d mind = rarely a night without dreams = coming back = don’t want to think = life begins escape = beggar of dreams\\an orphan = everything normal all of a sudden = own = loneliness = feeling of solitude = like you like me = survived = out of thousands = occupation of the mind = passports of the missing memories = recall moments = a touch a moment = a knew name and cross to wear on the heart = trying to makes senses in a time that makes not sense = risk lives to save ourselves = close to the time = at least = when war began = unofficial = the quiet life = memoir of = under the leaves = visiting life = single ray dares to shine = birthday holding on to life = world we would never know = when every thing changed = special murder of the soul = recall what happened = alive with terror = on of fire of the mind = opened window and jumped out = rest of life = closed life = confiscated = with the war inside = intimidate = garbage in the mind = conquerors stand at the gates of self destruction robust = strong = sometimes = remember = by the time = child hood ended/shattered = in the early morning = took turns = began to rain = back to memory = child memories of boots = couldn’t understand = pushed to length = later they called = did not see the tragedy = painted faces = walking with a cane = no one knew = off the train = producing goods = war effort = from childhood = escape = as well as that = sickly child = got to know = right from wrong = know for = hoping to last out = out last = testimony = among = in my opinion = profit from it = underground = pay with head = without images = interiors = hiding places = still there = earliest memories = carried away by memories = marked world forced out = driven out = hard one = day after day = very often = pushed out = terrible = not enough = constant pressure = created a mass = turning the land inside to a cometary of dreams = would be dead = the long march increasingly fearful = left alive = state of mind = still believe = might have chance to survive = been looking for a long time = agreed to do = marching in heavy boots = screaming of children = suddenly = don’t enter = everybody out = heartless = unconscionable = tearing hair out = who knows where = what could have done was undone = couldn’t save self = give life to life = waiting in the street = called out = ran into = somehow = i don’t = looked at in horror = nowhere to go = factory of the mind = stay there = went back = lived near by = searching for place to hide inside trying to connect memory to something = just a dark hole = went on and on = thunder = now is the time = they won’t hear us = escaped into oblivion = would life still be there = crawling through the mind = across the landscapes to the other side = hide out = still night = waited for = next thing remember = empty streets = deporting = wearing masks = eyes stuck out = monsters of the minds eye = graying of the mind = cleared out of = escaped = alive but not = listen = secret = in the garden = must be clean = so sad = hiding inside = water the garden = sat there = think about it = from one hiding place to another = crawling through the depths of = no place = more than a year = worst part = only whisper = = not anymore = stuck with us = provided with = so little = no more alive = secret = searching for = rushed 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lost chance = symbolic change = less is more = for all the = gotta get outa here creation of expectations = insurmountable = odds = last chance = open principle = rights = apathy = east side westward = agonizing reappraisal Predicate top = gave me goose pimples = good for you = prediction = minority = despite = exercise = step aside = perseverance = winning way back = back into heart = politics = see stuff like that in movies = remind you/me/us = wronged by perception = didn’t do that when i was born = why were you/i/we born = not reflection of realities = see about our/you/my self = put upon = its in the contract = not a choice = pulling aback = attitude toward = a level = facing the face = arrogance = see what you see = not such a good idea = under the circumstances = death is a funny see = sneaks up on you when not looking = not surprised = better check = not going to bite = what has surprised = lack of antenna = how far to go = impediment = how much and how = amazes me = continuing 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= also shows = won’t be any question = received = divided = skeptical = trade off = facing question discrimination = totally unequal equality = directly contrary = short change = only a matter of time = so far = don’t not think discrimination unfairly = eliminating disadvantage = there fore = to get around = unlikely to = not only hurdle = seem like = every body can do well old hands at = to celebrate the harvest = to drink to the future = owe more than repay = friendship = same where ever = is it ever going to end = wish could say it would/wouldn’t = that’s enough = medavoy tristar pictures = phoenix pictures the dark side of the dream = update = losing the battle = question looking good = looking for the answer = shape = protection = all in here = unanswerable where can you find = once in a life time = crash test = see clearly now = new for a limited time = always wanted to do that = immortal = unstoppable = one chance to live = integrity = instant cities = terrify the posers that be = down by the river = dragging over the rainbow = down by and by = harmony = explosive = not kidding = ended with = a moment there = in good faith = something funny going on = give it some respect = it always seems to go = don’t know what it like = going anywhere = depressing = no designed = not center of spot light = violated = seems to go = don’t know what you got = legends that left = cleared = need your help = make room to think = room for what = backup = increased = improvement = not just a = how do you feel = now here a first = natural instinct = you make me feel = new natural instincts = no name = how can you be sure = call = never worry = true voice = discover discovery = carry it = improve = pays to discover = one after another = it can be yours = enjoy whenever you want = comprised = inside in me = pressure = salable commodity home alone = problem = unplugging = using loneliness = think i’ve had enough = blast of light = you know you got it = makes you feel good = conquering 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= same ole same ole = new set of metaphors = old stories = valid mythological perspective = state is a machine humanity come for the heart = help me take the mask off = unmasking = being the uniform = executive of a system = machine the god taking a stone = turning outer nature inside = can’t help thinking = behaves in a whimsical = personifying machine = into a room = now there is = its there = god inside the machine = unforgiving = develop toward = all things speak = everywhere everything = what happens on = hierarchy y of = little miracles = sense of awe = set of signals = once said it = begin fooling around = code of = similarly = religion kind of software = building life on it crossed wires = never have experience = new myths = incorporating = forms of tools = power systems = new powers = surprisingly = not for a long long time to come = how do we live with out myths = service of myths = opening word to mystery = underlying under = = universe becoming = validating = take over = in 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= what about this and that = misguided = tell you if you have it = = making a choice = got into it very young = disgusted by = now hooked = don’t think so = take a break = fire in the mind = illustrated = support = what ever = great need and crisis = came to reach = long after passing = under attack = response = hard to imagine = some claim = remind us in the real world = take a moment = consider this = in a record = earned = but now needed = terribly wrong = taken out of = consider my/you/our self a lot to live for = for the good of the team = is there a = so close = more important than ever = any amount = time to renew = drop in the bucket = perception of = better way = gladiators = conventional wisdom = liability = both sides = outrageous = certainly not = over and out = recognized for = limit damages = restrict = not have gone to = often without knowledge = given not made such a choice = pitch for = cost of = sending a message = removal of purpose = information disclosure = 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say = no guarantee = in good time = bigger picture = head in sand = know enough concerned = unconcerned = about it = you/me/us = unbecoming = what is going to become = thought = unthinkable = i don’t know about you but i’m very concerned falling out of my mouth = a herd of antelope = loping = maybe it’s all for the better = for better or worse = who says = charging into the picture = falling free = words and more words = what am i saying second thoughts = dis ingenuous = near by = good bye = in haled by life = time becomes = protect from protection = wonder why = free to roam = not a prisoner = open eyes = wide = defining = spark inside = smiling faces = stepping outside = inside = expecting results are you = inspiring = don’t have a choice = still in a myth in the mind = time will tell = take note see for yourself = open eyes = feel violated = volition = vigorous = vindicated = vivisection = victorious = looking out = can’t stand it = turning deaf ear = what are we/you/i doing here = 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= notation to my self = reaction = no vacuum = no choice = no voice = raising the mind = raising the flag = frankly speaking = had all that and more = feared the eminent = feared the truth = it allows for = begging the beggar in the meantime = no time = be unreasonable = it means = not easy = step forward = face value = in the meantime what are you doing no time to waste = concurrently = out of = very politely = far cry from = mixed feelings = mixed bag = unequaled = leave as we = appropriate = unappropriated = noting escapes = as we arrived we leave underground = over ground = no nothing close to it = a far cry = breaking through = confiscated thoughts = undermined = under current = under thought inescapable = reality = unrealistic = strengthened by = if you want to = modifier = qualifier = mutually replicable = where to go = waiting for godot prisoner of time = illusion = dreams = reality = you/me/us = who are = wait a minute = where are we going = have we gone = maybe we are only what we think we are = Descarte was thinking = but who was he = who escapes themselves = in the finally analysis = there is no analysis = we are all prisoners of time = running out of time renaissance of the mind = interlude = great interest = fading fast = talk openly = keeping distance = spoke to you = spoke to me = who is this = does it work = consortium of theories = undone = undoing = into perception = too narrow mind = rebirth of you/me/us no effect = undermining = under attack = undo = strongly = overlapping = agreement against = left behind = mess movement = miss movement = miss management = not believing = saved from = serious = generous = contemplate = counterpart = cold hard = grow this in your mind = point out = wake up call = predilection = platitudes = hopes = hopelessness = true feelings = made in heaven = meeting with = turn out the lights and see what you can see about yourself believe it to believe or not to believe = quiet these days = mutiny of the mind = who will listen = more than you know = fire inside = nothing to say = trading places = not afraid = we have come so far = sooner or later = catch up to you/me/us = this too shall pass into history = the challenge is to considerations = finding value = finding my/your/our selves = begin to understand = undefinable = ununderstandable = unenforceable = much of what = speaking to the wall stigma = rushing into my/your/our/selves = who doesn’t = reaping sorrow/joy = confusion = need help = shouldn’t happen = where are we going = on the brink = life in the mind in your/our/my own words = despite our selves = not that much to be said too simple = there is something wrong = that’s all death is too good for some = life is too good for others = view inside = colors of life = abolished = underrating = over lapping = coalescing = naturally = combating virtue = willing to admit = but on condition = outside of = inside of = life is too much, too soon and too little n’est pas ca, c’est beau = n’est pas = obviously a sack full = by itself = this is true = words angels in chains = hard time trying to break free = escaping the dead hand of the mind = flying free = now you see = n’est pas hindered = banish suspicion = voice of = often lies = invading the mind = carved out of stone = Michelangelo angels = connoted from the imagination = floating mist = semi absurd = hold tight i think we’re in for it embodied images = Pegasus = upward drawn = rough draft = higher = reach = symbol of = imagination = lightly tethered buoyance = images = floating = aspiring = inspiring = perspiring invading the soul = the mind = beyond buoyance beneath = the waves = hovering = riding sea horses in the mind = aloft on the texaco sign = fire flies = flapping beneath the mind in no way perfect = vibrant color = flip and flop = self = at first = surprised = didn’t panic = paint more often = best = perhaps = but = problem = stick them in you mind before they diminish = hold on in no way perfect as if = not enough = need more ifs = lack of irony = ironing = pause = take a look = disappearing = fishmonger = sublime lack of lack = leering at myself in your image ah, quelle horreur = OP influenced by = descending = self conflagration = spotting the following = surreal = literary connection = mummer of the heart = have you heard = from within = without = buzz of redon prefigure = predict = unpredictable = does not = dans le reve = young woman not in hat = applauding the mind winged dreams = unmitigated = closed eyes = one eye series = shop signs = cutting prices = static = gutless = guiltless = halted in front of my self = exceeding somehow = open your/my/our eyes now and see as if never seen before posthumous truth praise posthumous truth praise = chimney flue = some get in your eye = soi-meme = visual field = unarmed = unnamed = presumably = path of truth = rebels = held for an instant = part of the truth = within the truth = no room for = shouldn’t settle for less mystery = my-story truth within the truth = surpass = surprise = illuminating = mind into transforming = substantiating the unsubstantial = upward = aspirations a matter of = realm of mystery = my-story on the path = released by light = burnt rock = une reve = river sprang = beneath = long grass = invisible road to hell = time capsule = leap in to the void unpainting = challenge of pessimism = close enough = wake up its too late = its beginning to = becoming a mirage in my own painting = can you see it = open your eyes anti realism = memory incoherent = envelope inside = lost meaning = private emotions = gap between life and art = referring to themselves = less than tactful = honorable opinion = ends in themselves = lack of = never the less = never less than less = circumstances = anti-realism mylife BEFORE ME mylife BEFORE ME = getting over my head = going into THE UNKNOWN = under the boardwalk = the sky and sea IDEA – take myself where ever I am = not with standing = to natasha eternity = gopher = belonging = credibility = at stake = why me = syndrome = who knows = who walks away = huberous = no more satisfaction = use of survival = promised land = more alert = silent penance = so we survived = for now = and later = for what = why = where = how come = inspect your/my/our selves = written over your face = talking behind your back = hiding from the future = from the past = from our/my/your selves = never mind = never more = and further more = where the sea meets the sky = and the dreamer meets the dream = that’s were i’ll be = stop thinking behind your back and who knows = out front = behind your back life going no where = what are people going to say after you/i/we are gone = one more thing = you don’t have to = = think = unthunk = come = commune = communications the problem = what are you/we hiding from = back down = see other side = nobody knows = making a mistake = so what’s new = you never know = don’t go yet = there is more = you/we are history = tomorrow history is waiting for 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= in my/your/our mind = minds eye = not with standing = where on = where off = at a time like this = believe you me = don’t believe a thing = listen carefully here it was = the message is being carried = before you me = us = the un us of you and me = and maybe of pablo neruda = working up a sweat = freeing the mind with twenty six dull chisels = running around on the edge of the word = carving the message in paper = in the mind = untold and un said = nothing left to the unsaid = as of yet = in-still = impact on the future = access = nature of nature = surprised = no surprises = native language of the mind = for better or worse dyslexic thought = forward backwards = inside out = outside in = in episodes of reality there is to be found sur-reality = basically = think my own way = you think so = as for all of this = and that = acceptably unacceptable = natural language = dyslexic saw you = saw me = saw us = think what you like = intuitive implications = complications = my mind beyond 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your/my/our selves = stranger unto our/my/your self = so whats new = whats old = don’t say = fell apart = facing your/our/my self = unselfish = self speaking = self taught = speaking sincerely = here we go again = understood in our hearts selling tragedies = blazing a trail inside to the soul = tragedy of humanity inside and out = trying to find solution = insolvable = exploding = invention of the mind = out of mind = reverse revenge = spark of recognition = war between the sexes = war between the self = staggering inside = crime of self censorship = thinking = life is full of danger = embarrassingly becoming irrelevant = before it happens to you/me/us = don’t have what it takes = terminate the fantasy = fantasize = = violation = spiritually empty = full of real-i-gion = empty toward … = thoughts beyond thought = beyond description = worshiping the unknown = worshiping a word = praying for forgiveness = heresy = hear say = may i say = i miss you who is us = may i be so bold = who are you/i/me/we/us = needless to say = unsaid = instead = mirror mirror on the wall = have you no sense oat all = crude notion _______________- try to imagine = losing time = loss of humanity = bound for the promised land = tethered to a dream = hanging onto the past = die a little every day = bent = broken = circumvented = difficult to comprehend gotta pay = never very far from you = can’t be apart of this = beyond imagination = what else can you do edge of ruin = overwhelmed = until now = below care = large margin = plagued by system = not the same = sever = raising voices = other side = polar opposites = deprived = depraved = incipient = comforted = same advice protect the innocent = mirroring who we are = it’s in you/me/ our hands = hand in hand = you’re asking me = not what you think = to get there together faster than alone = inside of you = survive life = rescuing inside = pathetic = come again = could have done worse = try to forgive = lot to catch up on something that’s yours = all the time = and at the same time = don’t forget it = put down = pull up = couldn’t be = but of course = screaming children playing on the street = what happen to us = no not never = eye opened = what do we know = only knew = angel = into nothing = something = passes for what = can’t see = what you doing = really gets you/me = see it from heaven = memories are too personal = suppose you found the secret of = best of life before it began = what to live for = wish i did = lost dreams = without reflection = dared to tell the story = what do we know = don’t know what = need a vacation from life = feed back = first time for you = think about it = digging up the past = the future = got carried away = get smart = we need to talk = where are we going = in a straight jacket of the mind = is it just you and me = it is = where are you = not myself these days = what is there to be afraid of = past time = past the time = passing time = i pass not my/your/our selves = sick of life = disappointed in = can’t believe it = superficial = the usual please = haven’t seen me lately = never around when = almost at the edge = one extreme or the other = intouchable = what does it all mean = revisit life admirable = defining good/bad and indifferent = genetic relevance = over estimated = born with human nature conscious delusions = deluded morality i won’t dance = forced to look into mirror = can’t go back now = backwards = heart ache = but of course = pathetic = small mind = lost and found = fading the background = apparition = do as you wish = is there hope ? moral system = jealousy = thread = emotional = attachment = underlying = undelivered = we do as we do = what do you do = the things we do to each other = to our selves = beyond morality = reaction = skeptical = ruthless natural selection = unselected = unsatisfying = unsuspecting = genial disorder = copacetic = gratitude of human nature = sensationalism = first night = fight natural impulses = why it seems as if = it may be the glue in our genes = unconscious = inconsistent = periods in his or her story = sleeping = impulse = down side = upside = tough trade offs self conscious = underlying motivation = pushing me/you/us = wake up and go back to sleep = shaping life = on written page = feel the words = behind words = in front of you/me/us = with/without words = thought/thoughtless = comes a moment in time = uncanny impression giving birth to you/me/us = faith = faithless = connection to roots = why why = can’t answer those questions = fortunate enough = full of energy = help me/you/us understand = delusion of delusion = discover = what interest you = trust = the choice makes itself approaching = collaboration = exchange = trust = confidence = creating condition = trust self to become = together through trial and error = let me know when i wake up at the end = one can’t be at the end = tell who said what = building up = capacity to risk = success/failure = ow worst enemy = see the difference = wishing = what expectations = feeling empathy = label = begin to see = vast mystery inside = outside = why are we = pleasure is all mine = evolution of = nature of humanity = how came to be = become = unbecoming stubborn = controversy = simplistic = debatable in/at the end = one can’t tell = who said what = building up = own worst enemy = feel better = inherently inherent = dis inherited = uninherited = her-irritable = that’s it inspired by poem = Liszt Faust = lovers in a dream = composed dancing thoughts = legend of Faust = dancing on mephistos grave = a waltz with life = a second coming = subtitles = seems to have been in fact inspired by a poem running out of ideas = calling names = admit it = not going to make a difference = life goes and = think about it = you/me/we = stormy seas = tied in and up = missing in action = out for the = alerted = wolf pack in the mind = on guard = off guard = searching for an echo = inside = sinking = contact = battle stations = destroyers of the dream = invincible = invulnerable = illusion live in the cometary of the mind = remnants of a dream = saw it all = saw nothing = in view of = is seems quiet clear songs i never heard = meaning behind = a lullaby forever = in a dream = a losing battle = appearing sane = don’t give it up = have to listen = doesn’t fit anymore = unfit/unfitting = it’s not all bad = place to be = agonizing = shuffling along = measuring time play with this = can i = moving along = moon beam = can’t be sure = can’t be the same = you never know = no = gone to far = lost humanity = startled = look up/down/all around = please slow down = unsung hero = open your mind = its what you don’t see, see vanishing species = getting in trouble = you can’t stay here = whose telling this me or you = conversation over, case closed = don’t care = not interested in being like me/you/us = but what happened = what to do = what not to do = it’s not a life = look forward = pause = pains you/me = sounds like everybody else = afraid of failing = well you should be = or not to be = paint your face and make an ass of yourself = whatever it is/was ice man cometh = gone with the wind = with out = original a place = = don’t give me a hard time = hanging the moon and the stars = terra = life following you = falling apart = saying i did it = compelling = fishing for = checkered = = checked out = link = thinking = nothing = left with confession = serious troubles = out of bounds = reversal = frightening = miss carrying = much easier now = avoiding realism guilt by association = you and me both = where life is = where are we/you/me = standing in the shadows of the moon = falling from the heavens = little man laughing to himself inside out ready to step up and out = hope that = remainder = how to accept it = depends on = what do you think = variety of issues = preempted = who knows who and what = dislocated = in thin air = closed = locked out = morceau of solitude = beginning of the story = forms = formless = pulling punches = the legend who lives = before its over = begging forgiveness from the soul = final appearance = finding my/your/our selves out of touch = with = without = algorithms = apply within = priority = makes no difference = no further = running against arrogance = driven by = roadless = putting and pulling = together and apart = outsider message = minor point = keep talking = what’s new new development = possessed of that = running against myself = running from my/your/our selves = music in the background = flamenco dancer fighting with phantom shadows in the mind think it’s time = cut and run = trading off = diminished = first of many = make it happen = deliver us from ourselves = just one more thing = so and so = getting ready to leave = out of time = before you leave = just one more thing = it’s now or never saw the dawn = dawn saw me = broke new ground = what ever it was = longing to see = too stubborn to be born = invigorating unforgotten unforgettable = over you/my/our shoulder = from the beginning of the beginning without you i would never have found this = come over when you can = here take this = make fiction out of reality = made into fiction = reality = unrealistic = too unreal = without writing = not imitating = through words = how can you/i/we take this = whats in front of = run through = captured energy = in fact = one day = whole of life experienced in a moment = was brought to life in your mind = without you i would never have found this don’t know what to think of = changed your/my/our mind = reintegrate from = cut off from self = deciding on what = with sadness = stuck in sadness = main thing = don’t see that point = recover from loss of predictability = repeating my/you/our selves = don’t think about it = mimicking you/me/our selves = no sense to all of this = don’t know what to think where is everybody = where am i = what is it all coming to = where are we going = addicted to becoming = attention = the man who = looking for the subject = mysterious = unknown = reflecting myself human tragedy = somebody elses pain = closer then anyone knows = well adjusted to tragedy = what went wrong = in turn = senseless = strikes again = what does it tell us = tell me = tell you = something here, there and everywhere = don’t ask me why = humiliating = get out of here = vain = waste of a good mind = don’t mind = trying to remember = forget it = i don’t know what it means = just don’t = life is a hopeless illness that nobody escapes door of perception = open closed = heaven and hell = anything wrong = world before you/me = only you and me here = having kept it inside = worse it will be = bottling up = un bottle the future = i hardly recognized myself = i think to myself = anything you want to tell me = can’t live without you = keep an eye on this = see it all = remember when shallow perception = a misconception = rhapsody of dancing thoughts = discourse = promised land of dreams = mystery = migrating ideas = story of the world = take you through crosses = religion of destiny = how do i tell you this = concentrate = when i get grown = what about you = torturing yourself = have to hear my own voice = no one will know = so pay attention = confused about reality = parallel life = back drop = rhythm = seep through the images = never mind = what can i do = bother seriously in trouble = rhapsody = don’t be so naive = head spinning = driving yourself crazy and doing a good job = inviting trouble = resonance = something to talk about = leap in or out = do something = give up worrying = defining circumstances = juries out on us = having a life = meaningless things = twist of reality = can’t articulate = star in big letters in the mind = motivation to do = don’t see your/my/our selves = actually not = flightiness = process of deep thought = make this stuff up = don’t go away thinking wrong thing = just go away something you need to be aware of = don’t know how to live = what do you mean = thing awful thoughts = unthinkable thoughts = strange = go ahead = think = way to go = psychological umbilical cord wrapped around your neck = hanging our selves = hung jury eternity awaits = belonging to eternity = oblivion is where we all meet = at the stake = at stake = why me syndrome = who = knows = who walks away = irrational = erratic = no more satisfaction = silent penance = eternity awaits use of survival = in the promised land f = more alert = inspirit of our/your/my selves = written all over your face = talking behind your back again life going nowhere = what are people going to say after = what are you/we hiding from = back down = see other side = making a big mistake = don’t go where you’re not wanted = you = ever know = your/we are history = the point is = not the point = people looking at us/you/me strangely as if simply because = because because = it reminds = obsessed = not real = really = yesterday was once tomorrow = get over it = blame the world if it makes you feel better = think i care = what’s it going to take = how should i know = who knows = desperate = on a mission = life is traumatic = never recovered from = hard to say = last resort = nothing personal = not getting it = absolution = check it out = under = over = inside out = see for your self = take a good look = look again before it’s too late = that’s understandable = nothing left = absolution absolutely nothing much to say = what do you say = please take a seat = be calm = relax = disqualified = not good enough = represented by deception = this is your life = you story = please be calm = lower your voice inside = off balance = stick around = created by you/me/us = do you remember = vicious cycle = in various sizes = one size fits all = good night for now = kiss off = extra protection = stays on through thick and thin = today for the first time in a long time = listen = we are all screaming inside = you’re not alone = take care = do what you i we do = no way = whatsoever = till the end of time = what do you think = results of life soon = report card day is coming = soon at a local store near you = what are you/i/we going to do with the rest of our lives = undone = unthinkable = unthinking = anybody care out there = who cares = what’s the matter = are you/we/us happy now = see what i/you/we’ve done now i was wrong = making things worse = not your/my/our fault = sorry i missed you = something you don’t like = but what about = materializing = pressing buttons = is yesterday today = on your way now is today yesterday = or tomorrow = get help = can’t afford to miss tomorrow = anxiety = speculation of anxiety kills = who is it from = from me to you = watch your/my step = living for yesterday = painful memories = lost i yesterday = waiting for tomorrows yesterdays to be over COMPLACENCY RULES of decorum = MAY observe = material APPEAring to disappear = DISTURBED SENSIBILITIES = in the altogether = break from = reiterate decorum = fiddler on the roof = inDIRECT = UNDERCUT EXPECTATIONS = tradition = absent of mind = absent of convention = any sense = INWARD OUTWARD, ONWARD, AWKWARD = awkward = bring something TO OURSELVES = a moment beyond = REJECT the rules of PASSIVITY = the usual = COMPLACENCY = be mad = demand … UNLOCKING the MYstery WINDOW = in and out = OPEN and closed = project = tools to advance = music = unlimit the limit = position y/o/m self = night sky = it APPEARS from that = and this = and furtherMORE = anyWHERE in the solar system = zoom in = zoom out = IN CONJUNCTION = rotate = beneath or above = adjust VIEW = field of view = vision = IMAGINE IMAGINATION = now explore THE UNIVERSE = unlocking THE MYSTERY appearing without words NOTHING could stop nothing could stop = SAVE US FROM REASON = raiders FROM THE SEE = seen = SAW = eerie mixture = common illusion = expression of = formidable FORCE = THREATENED = why WILL history FORGET us tRACING THE ROOT tracing THE ROOT = rooting the root = unrooted = UPROOTED = route = resolution island = departed = begin to soften = precious = wonder stranded = place to settle = river flowed OUT OF a lake = controversy = see for YOURSELF said THE blind man = POINT of revenge = PHILOsophical REBEL rejecting CONVERTER = seeking THE UNEXPECTED = POWER OF written word = SUR-REAL = outlaw = TRACES of = avenging angels = scourge of entropy = EMERGING = dangerous emanations = psychic landscape = ANTECEDENTS = philosophical rebel SCULPTural WORDS CHISELed = hammered = cut = broken = glued = sawed = clawed = splintered = groove = mortised and tendon = beveled = curved = driven = ENTICED BY the SEDUCTION of words tANGLE of slaves suffering even NOW = still = waiting FOR US/YOU/ME = painful reality = wishing doesn’t make it true = BIRTH OF = MY/YOUR/OUR VOICE = old concepts = boring shit = controversy = pushing my/your/our selves = confounded = trying to bow out gracefully = TANGLE OF THOUGHTS slave to the mind stopped hearing/seeing/BElieving/living/LOVING/dreaming skeptic = revising A LEGEND = go with your instincts = time TO FACE the beast = YOU/ME/US/ = stopped hearing/seeing/believing/living/loving/DREAMING DRIVEN INTO the page searching = gathering = enduring = scrupulous = unscrupulous = culminating = understanding the interconnections = disparate ELEMENTS = CONVERGE = driven in to the page = odds DO NOT LOOK good continuing on same path = conglomerate of ideas = MASS MESS = emergence… = CONSPIRING = AGAINST SURVIVAL = devotees OF MASS CULTURE = arise the mind = connoisseurs of thought = creativity needs your courage = MIND LANGUISHEs in a sea unINSIGHTFUL = marrying images and idols of power = a STRANGE statement = STALEMATE = OF MODERN TIMES in the midst of mass mess museum of the MIND/WORD library INSIDE = OUTSIDE = CANDY STORE of the mind = coexisting = POETS OF MIRAGES taste for the profoundly absurd = awkward = converging imagination = reaching out = questioning forms = appearances = complacency = reaching a wider audience = living INSIDE THE museum of THE MIND/WORD IDIOTCRACY moratorium on = assessment = HEADING TOWARDS = you’ll find it = potentially profound = couldn’t be much worse = linking us = indeed = = partner = best of friends = best of enemies = sustains imbalance = life = death = weary = BEING OVERWHELMED = underwhelmed = TOO MUCH HUMANITY for you/me/us = how much is too much = TOO CLOSE for me =/you/us = less dependent = new mechanism = concerned about it = if all goes according to plan = overriding concern = unsustainable = have to deal with it = not effective reality = sucking the blood from our minds = idiot-cracy RESCUE ME/you/us would there RESCUE ME/YOU/US = bothersome = privately = don’t know what to think = talking about you/me/us = QUESTION BEHIND us/you/me = not favorite = in the end = don’t expect = what = another point of view = know that = major stories = slowing down = there could be POSSIBLY imPOSSIBLE available = this is = crisis = what went wrong = FOLLOWING THE SKY = what you want to know = how do it happen = same for everybody everywhere = rediscover your,our.my self = at work OPENING THE MIND = tear your tongue out and look at what YOU ARE SAYING = in-sight = out-of-sight = present YOURSELF TO YOURSELF = possibly impossible = it’s all a MIRAGE = LIFE war stories = walking on mercury = same ole same ole = what is there = simple things make a difference = moved hearts = abandoned hope = future = slide rule = cost effective = outrageous = addendum = abandoning mortality = extreme case = risk = fear = evaluate = what = going to do what you think = promulgating = more morbidity = sound good = see changes = excess = cost ability = address success = dress for success = driving away from myself/yourself = wrap this up = right the balance = do you now believe = turn back the clock BEYOND PATHETIC MAN liberating himself from himself = BEYOND PATHETIC = from mother of us all and = AMAZED = desert of the mind = unwarranted = tell me what to see = tell me what you/i/we see = i see = protection of protection = security = insecure = FUTURE ENDANGERED = FREEze subject = GRID LOCK of the mind = corner stone = how do you respond = must comply = waste of WASTE = NOT talking are you/we/ MORTALITY spending MORTALITY = administer = not measurable = right to know = EXPOSE EXPOSURE = showing = shooting at moving tarGET = conscious of nature = marking TIME CAST OUT shocking = i want to talk to you = CAST OUT to wander = gotta go if we are going = you’ll see = its not so bad = hunger for soul food = heart pleads = THE UNTHINKABLE = scared to gamble with the soul IT’S NOT THE FISH WE ARE AFTER forget about time = forget about it = touch INSIDE your self/myself = tender LONGING = arriving in a strange land = dark hallway = aged before time = without = bleeding heart = tears = without tears = imagine = stolen dreams = inherent = rooted in life = PRIMACY = memories resurface to kill the present = you can’t forget = time running out = waiting = no message = asking for forgiveness = until death do us in = imagine what would happen = LOOK AROUND = what do you see = too dangerous to OPEN EYES/MIND/HEART = IT’S NOT THE FISH WE ARE AFTER VERSION OF LIFE television = recreation of IMAGINation continuously limitless = playground built on a cometary of ideas/imagination = grabbing for life/death = properties lost = lost memory = taking that to the grave = miserable time = living through fear of being discovered = VERSION OF LIFE WHAT TO THINK = WHAT TO DO I don’t know WHAT TO THINK = WHAT TO DO = last of the = RUINS OF THE MIND = in the diary of life = it is written and UNWRITTEN CRYING FOR LIFE against a tree = without blemish and with = HUDDLING together IN A MIRAGE of warmth = enter a circuit = just to stay a live = times have changed = time to change = this will live with us forever = CRYING FOR LIFE SILENT QUESTION frustrated by what you/I/we see = puppets HELD UP BY imaginary = BURNING into the mind = apart of and from history = TRUTH a cadaver = life like = statement in it self = captured in emptiness? = evidence of life = new identity = failed to find your/my/our selves = SILENT QUESTION MIGHT HAVE BEEN as we are called = INTO THE FUTURE = OBLIVION awaits us all = father of stories = MIGHT HAVE LIVED = what does it mean = not following = MIGHT HAVE BEEN PITY PITY what’s happening = remember the PAST = remember THE FUTURE = things simply are not that simple = not A MYTHOLOGY = \\;your/my/our lives = maybe a myth = old woman sweeping their history under a rug = eye witness to the future = see and remember more than we realize = anchored in memories = look at this mirror = SEE FOR YOURSELF = final path – cemetery = touching sadness = touching HELL = PITY pity AT LAST smuggling back into life = through my/your/our eyes = THE BLIND MAN SAW past himself = into your eyes = beyond thought = BEYOND IMAGINATION = at last i/we/you said it = at last END THE BEGINNING? I’ve been waiting for you = you need some thing = WORRYING too much = forget it = do I/you/we look that stupid = who wins = is the END THE BEGINNING? = we are all dying together = NO TIME to live = STICK AROUND INCUBATING CONTEMPLATING = thought = imagination = life = warmth = child inside = roses = TO A WILD ROSE = a sketch in your mind = LOST HORIZONS = who are we = INCUBATING HEART FAILURE on the way = magnifying = CAREFUL = condition unknown = what can I/YOU/WE say = THINKING OR SINKING = NEVER MIND = decisions = you don’t make = it all counts ? = getting ready to take THE LEAP MISSING THE BEAT too much to little TO LATE = WHAT ARE WE/you/i to do = will it = create something = my promised land = no standing = no sentimentality = journey = POETRY OF POVERTY = lilly of the field = HARD TO BELIEVE DON’T BELIEVE IT when are you available = made it = driving force = POSTURING = crippled mind = every reason to believe = LEGEND OF AN ILLUSION = controlled by time = no one knows it but the END HAS ALREADY PASSED = not ready = don’t WANT TO LEAVE THE FUTURE = not now = great-full to be = not ready to live = WHAT WHERE YOU THINKING = don’t believe it BELIEVE IT NO DAMN SENSE makes NO DAMN SENSE = it that THE TRUTH = in out and out in = trying to make sense of the truth = innocence LOST = LOST AND FOUND = wonder for… = need heart = are you/we ok I DON’T GET IT got to DO SOMETHING = why can’t you/i/we fix everything = forgot along time ago = playing against yourself = I DON’T GET IT IF YOU I’ll go = if you want me = glad to see you = nothing can separate us now = acts of missed moments = overheard = MUCH ADO ABOUT NOTHING = enDANGERed species = pushing up daisy = nice TO BE remembered = I’LL PASS YOU GO WORDS ARE JUST WORDS scariness inside = need something = different kind of = WALKING AWAY FROM MYSELF = words following you/me/us inside = listen carefully = can you hear the silence = WORDS ARE JUST WORDS EPIGRAM reoccurs = obsessive = vanity = people who are incapable of thinking only BELIEVE = BELIEVE YOU ME = flesh it out = still life = still later = are you us = not far away = there are certain things = inside of you/me/us beginning to see/think/feel = wake up this is NOT A REOCCURRING EPIGRAM THEY ARE THE US WHICH WE ARE note = equates feeling with childrens art = failure of perfect CONSENSUS = failure of BOX FULL OF NOUNS = ee comming = failure to feel “is” verbs DRIVE EE TO THE EDGE Feeling = IS<> Motion too ee = a degree of IS or is it = footnote = lean towards thinking = <>not t completely feel = elsewhere = spontaneous = moment an accident = only occurring now at your local theater inside = ee sequences out of step = step into the box of verbs and nouns seeing sound = hearing g color = simple sensation = occur = abdicate = now or then = still more = i/you/me/we feel = pause = in terms if then = in transition verb to feel = conjugate bliss = what more can i say = sound or color melting into one = for instance = beyond ourselves and after that = sorry to interrupt you but there is someone here to see you = engulfing thinking / before thinking = accident of nature = you think = lost = declining = no match = yet for a moment = suppression prevails = seeing pure perception = see illusions = not passive = actively merging our minds = into one = consciously unconscious = collective unconscious = convert state of thinking into before thinking = abstract absurdity sanity = again = but this time think = or don’t think = smooth like silk = hardy = fine = swirling clouds = shadow of myself = abstraction of myself again = into an art form = under the sun = true feelings = separated before we began = before we were = but = liberate self by putting aside the self = and you = antique = show = ad-infinitum = add adnausium = a continua = of this i am sure of nothing need a little more than faith to survive = blind with eyes open = back to normal = nothing can do about it there is no time = never again = said some = guilty because you survived = why me? = why you = listening to end of the world = think we have a chance hello is anybody there = thats to be expected = look = the pied piper = over thee = answer right in front of you/me/us unforgivable sin = taking pleasure in destroying dreams no one will know = free thinking the unthinkable = un-thinking = my father died = so will i/you/we = the mortality of immortality = searching in the see of the mind = mind lost in a sea of illusions = at a store near you = beyond your imagination = hope = behind you = before you = you too shall inherit the earth = find out about = pay for it on way out = lost sight of = what the purpose of all this = what does it mean = where did we go wrong if you can’t handle it = it’s always plugged up = afraid to cry = who = what ever happened before was in the past = don’t leave me = fight for hearts and minds = memories make nightmares = treat life gentle = i am as i am call tomorrow = = rotary dial = additional files needed = run on = voice = soft = wear = sincerity = you keep it = it keeps you = rise to the occasion = a vision = put aside differences = better than nothing = broad day light = speak out = ruined my concentration close to death/life = living = dying = overwhelmed = touched by = where there wasn’t any = able to do = urgent need = fled = this is the structure = what’s next = bring home point = the roots = bring back humanity = tomorrow and tomorrow sense of helpless = encompassing fatigue = out of the blue = dreams drive us = don’t you feel anything = music box = pile drive = breaking up civilization = under stress = understood = under attack = in a daze = message to wake up = composed by = directed by = no i don’t know What’s the matter = not rational = i missed you/me/us = responsive = respectful = passing you/me/us bye = do you think about it much = misplace attachment = you can bet you bottom dollar = you can set your mind to rest = are you here for real = why are you here come to think of it = where = your rage = an emotional eunuch = if there be on earth = how is the becoming = desperation of loneliness touching = poetic = beauty = wonderful = relaxed = exciting = expressive = speaking g = strength haunting made out of life = release pressure = surgeon = moment of truth = soul of = waves of passion = driving force = way of life = not life threatening far behind = music in the night = heart over head = inner mission = feeling intent = choruses of angles = angels of paradoxes = outside the flame leaps into = beyond = obsessed with the future of the past = inspired by elevating the past = made present = face the facts = rests inside ________________________________ rebirth of decomposition = occurs = outstanding = become = became = because = before = after = theater relationship to before = antiquity = notation to begin again = crossing stone shoes = puppets = inner music = lightening rod = sounds of the ocean = designed by = unbuilt = performing ensemble = recycle birth = rebirths discomposing = natural world = critical = created environment = special qualities = improving = imagine = world of you/our/my design = choice is yours/ours/mine = materials = immature = immaterial = twigs and branches = weaving the natural world bridging the difference = people to people = crossing the unerasable = erasing the unerasable = culture = language = you/me/us = mythology = such fears = calm hearted = flow free = inter-interest to all = coffering = first time = showed off = dazzling = display = message is clear = removal of restrictions = bridge of difference avoiding divisiveness = issue = at hand = underfoot = overhead = down under = agree to joining = above it = cooperation = exchange = the globe = network = according to communication = difficult = running from despair = shall we walk = or = better run = before = my word = who guards the guards = we were talking about something else = building up = nothing has happened = because = protecting imagination implication = can’t’ come up with explanation = don’t even know = what’s going on = adrenaline running = irrelevant = wasting time = thought you’d never ask = critical = big gamble = too much too soon = unbroken = unbearable = un un = and then some writes = whose idea = broken dreams = call now = all wet = don’t you understand = sensitizing = tormented = no defense = brief = roller coaster = integrity lost = any minute = ironic = ready to role = next time do you see = lift off = hot on the trail = waiting for what = through waiting = keeping fit = just passing = too much = locked out = tell me = just waiting to happen = locked out = tell me = how would I/you/we do it = don’t know anything about that = so much goes unsaid = talk = words from many pieces = speak to me = make believe = heart dead inside = remembering = leading the way into the unsaid = listen risk of inaction = worse than in action = or = no life without = by the way = the administration = what can I say = out of touch = reach rough it up overwhelmed by the stench of illusion = watching a boy = myself = run down the street = the boundaries of silence = eclipse of the imagination a moment alone = home in one piece = keep going = what’s happening = nearly lost = pin cushion = serious talk = there may happen = one moment please = everything IDEA – dreamed = think about it = forget what I said = not quite dead = the lot = behind by time = fond farewells = at the risk of = we’ve go to talk waiting = probably lost = hard = heard = make no mater = look ahead = cannot cover = nothing = no one can tell = move = more to come = confused = hard to know = more or less = at least in the mind = watching inside = waiting is all I have to say overtaken = status = stakes are high = love demands everything = do not forget = where ever i am there you are too = Beethoven = benefits = farther than that = said so = the potential is being over taken by itself progress is still limited = Paris to London = it can certainly be = loving the unattainable = destroying happiness Beethoven = finding oneself = accept your self diary = although = in the last the innovation = capacity = is limited by progress as wonderful as it sound = it’s only sound = sounds good/bad = sweeping away the traces = = all that remains is the solace in nature = wisdom out of doors = he cries = overjoyed can one find peace Beethoven in every raindrop in every note = the sound of the un said and unsung still ring and resonates explosive = brutality = forbidden silence = sinned = empathy to communicate = naked honesty = knew no bounds = burst of pride = over and above do you have time to dream = silencing of the soul = know anguish of a message = fire breather a problem of humanity = involved = invasion = rhythm changed = and i froze = cried for = those who talk violence die by violence shrine of memories = careless with time = under the rug = do you consider yourself outliving time = onwards = dancing wildly within = caught in a web = tortured realism = a great hollow void = makes of the unconscious = dimension of = depiction of = life a collage of living = a new volume = alphabetic order = disorder = new frontiers of speculation = reference = focus = stand along = on a point = energy = background = new them = solo venture = a new volume unsaid and unthought before long = only one left = can’t survive = new set of = all in one meal = had enough of this = haven’t you = not used to it = tiger people fighting against themselves doevil (do-evil) = last few lived = difficult to see = here stay here = strange about this place = somewhere out there live with it = learning = just listen to it = strange life = this is a jungle = sense of terror = last remaining = unlike it = dealing with fear on the edge = persecuted = amazed = tolerance = state of mind = respect = laid out = never underestimate = killed by persecution = deep respect = seems strange = a phenomenon = can hardly believe it = think it = it’s very rare = left behind = tragic story = left behind = lot tolerance = million miles = from anywhere home inside = not much protection = can’t turn back = do it by my self = unless it finds me = not what I imagined = bounced around = coming to terms = bedside greeting = eager to meet = trying to imagine = searching for loneliness saying so -suppose = better memory = compaction = think it over = watch yourself = pay attention = its urgent = not time to think = pot boiler = no one to trust = nothing to say = which it isn’t = degradation = relief what’s going on = ain’t no shows = what’s it worth = see it before its gone time of your/mine/our lives = what to do with yourself = plenty of trouble = no clue = if we fail = dancing with wolves s searching lowliness = relations = page 1 0f 4 = ominous = lots to answer for = not invisible = looking for = traces = tracks = began to wander = to wonder = quiet = low profile = it’s worth it = if we get one = beyond doubt never underestimate = fighting off = intruders = intruding = no telling what might happen = lifting dreams = humbling experience = in for it = here’s to us and … new frontier = the mind = historian = excursion = panorama = most important = call now = in sight = another crack = sign of the times = hear of = tearing me apart = heat wave = tear you/me/us away = from = birds of a feather = take my handyman not be = maybe = what you say = keep a secret = here = not = no just not now = what’s all this about = not a big loss = you aren’t = you ain’t got nothin = open it up = thanks all it takes = you mean that’s all it takes = conceded = concealed not short = going to = very big now = lately = later = unexpected = bye now = buy now = an adventurer = still = back to homeland = spectacular = unusual things = just get wet = one question = first time = crossing myself = any good = landscape = guilty = confident = reach out = looks like a nice day = race against time = walking stick = nose = life on the target line = of course = wrecking dreams = shocked = on the edge = screaming = go away for a while = be back forward = when are you leaving = badly prepared = glamorous = beneath us/you/me = distinct feeling = anything to be ashamed of = what to expect = into the world = white swan = knowing where you are = reminds you/me = purposeful = purposeless = for how long = trading in/out/off = ingredients = deep fried = all the same = from across the way = think so don’t want to see = over night = full of hope = tickets please = collect you/me/our selves = on a journey describe me/you/we = what now = raw and vulnerable = cover up = full = feel = ELASTIC = BE WHAT BECOMING = AFFECTED = CLOSE = DOSE OF THINKING = GRANDEUR = GRANDER THAN CAN IMAGINE = NOT HOW I SEE IT HIDE = NO PLACE = HAVE IT OUT = CAN’T OR CAN CHANGE PAST = MAN ON THE RUN = NUMBED SELF = NEXT STEP = GETTING HELP = THATS THE WAY = ICICLE = WHERE ARE YOU GOING = TIME TO GO = MAKE A DIFFERENCE = INNOCENT CHILD = nobody knows = you should = sounds good = get it before it’s too late = right offer = sure why not = nobody knows for sure if it really happened = what does this have to do with anything = who said so = it’s available = in front of your eyes = facing within = how it all began = apparently = now i’ve heard it all it never happened = well there it is = next story = scheming = quick get it = replace your own and mine = someone inside you/me/us = other people = don’t do it = don’t need it = need you = gotta go = what can i say time to start/stop = hate the waiting = what can you/i/we say = almost there = have complications = fade out/in = fading = too much to feel = piano solo cleansed = memory = rude = piercing = born with memories never experienced = last journey = silent voices = ghosts of humanity = take a good look = hiding the universe = outrage = though trauma = heritage of unconscious = know what i/you/we are = cheating mortality = come alive not sure you/i/we can go on = out of range = memories = anchor = its not = representation of what life is like = where do you need to go = taken out of context = what are you looking at = dead end = at a loss = how to tell you this = to a certain extent = passing life on = cemetery of dreams = embedded in humanity = looking for evidence = partial memories = begging to understand = need to see rush to see = no loner enough = in my dream = when do you/i/we wake up = cold winter of the heart = what else can i/you/we do = deceit = lost story = once stood straight = no longer exists = it’s sad but true = world gone = slowly disappearing = still refuse = looking for my/your… just another story = back in the mind = memories overcrowded = blockaded any moment = too excited = it has not changed = humanity = indifference = it has = don’t have right to = right words = wrong words = can you imagine = invisible world = no hope for = prepare yourself = its all we/i/you got leaving words =tears to my eyes = exists only in the mind = requiem for the living = how do you do = how did you come to find this = in the hands = propaganda = how life looks on the other side = to this day i still don’t know = stuck in memory = begging = here we are = can you stop living = brace yourself = in your face = who could afford it = its about time = laughing under the skin = lost in thought = out of the way = maybe = stuck in memory if you can’t handle it = its always plugged in = afraid to cry = who = what ever happened = before you/me/us = what can it be = will it pass = maybe it already = don’t leave = here = take this = it me = fight for hearts and mind = memories make nightmares = treat life gentle = i am what i am = call tomorrow today resurrect the living = = risk of inaction = no life without = by the way = what can i say = out of touch = maybe = reach = beyond = out of reach = trilogy nature of nature = going my way = everything does = rediscover = instincts from = down under = coming soon concerned = about you/me/us = what’s going on = what’s going to become of = un-becoming = unthinkable = un-conscionable = i’m concerned falling out of my mouth = a heard of antelope = charging in to the future = like a leaf = falling free = words and more words = what am i/you/we saying you are not alone = i’ll go = if you = i had to see you = nothing can separate us now = acts of = over heard = much ado about nothing = endangered species = a lone lowliness = pushing uo daisies someday = nice to be remember = you go first basic message = long term = short term = what’s happening = not all the same = not with standing = shrinking = lack of appreciation = radical results needed = enthusiasm = tend to be too self satisfied = not clearly true = what = planet wide force = years to come = music all around = piano jumping up and down = basic message = listen besides myself = toy affair = find an experience = can’t find it = not expressing my/you/our selves very well = interpreting = redefining = defining = our/your/my self = impulse to = wait a minute = cut off cold = pushing the edge = turkey trot = edge of the dream = outrageous = basic instinct don’t give up = lost your/my/our selves = domesticated = connected to = don’t be denied = difficult to…. = rhetoric forbade = crossing wires = child collecting ideas = i don’t know = how do you do that = censorship of disagreement = what effect = controversy = shocked to core = look at rhetoric = tired of living in a shadow = of the mind = chance of redemption = in a desert = hold it close = before it is time to part = well = how and when = learning to = en -ter before it’s too late = wait = all is well = last a life time = banquet of = missing = linking bodies and mind = stress of modern life = receiving with hands = ocean of calm = looking for life = hello there = hollow where = ended as far as it goes = and there you have it without = voluptuous = feel without eyes = see with ears = nose = receiving = how do we make sense = raw data = whispering in your ear = wriggling = sensation becomes perception = think of it = what’s gotten into think i don’t know = replay of the unknown = live life and then what becomes of you = don’t know = reading minds eye = lost in eternity relay = activity of the mind = pattern of experience = entering = linking = lurking = opposites = what you say = sensitive = interconnection = stimulate = used to think = recently = modify = can almost touch it = it’s a sensation = phantom = can almost catch the future with eyes closed phantom -step side = aroused = by contradictions = what can happen = doesn’t make sense = doesn’t exist = pressure to escape = moving on at this stage = being involved = intimacy = returning to = awakening = feeling = dreams = intimacy of space = enveloped in each other = thirst = cellular intelligence = part of it = refreshing our selves = inside out = type of vision = aware of last contact = phantom = stepladder inside out grasping at life = being alive/dead = what’s the difference = look up look down = looking for meaning = meaning to look = reality of imagination = stay with = stay with you/me/us = touching thought = grasping for air mystery unfound = means = motive = rely = reality = on surprise = surpass = suppose = just for a moment = belly of the beast = bring me back = wonder = do but it’s all a dream = row row row = and row some more = it’s all a dream can’t be = you see = piano dancing through clouds while flying inside out = upside down = thought you though = thought too much = don’t hold too tight = you may strangle yourself = watch your step it soon = your opinion = no matter what = what = talk about it = return to the mystery = the sense of sense = let me know when curious illusion = as if = confront the mirror = = important = projects = projected external = world = away of life = common to all of us = how do you = basic trust = a way of life = it all starts within = bonding = unbending = over come with life/death = deep wells = child hood memories = laughing away = kiss freeing = voyeur = impersonal = to be close mystery unsolved = just what you want = full of subtle with reminder = don’t go yet = safe = loosing touch = preoccupied = losing sight sight the = not much room = take time out = what comes naturally = what about each other = emotional elements outside of that = not aroused = any more than that = tense = mechanical = = anticipate the worst = show of = embarrassed = for now whose to give and whose to receive = out side of that there is but it’s dream dream = a phantom = a ghost and ghostwriting the mind = invading the outer = relaying = as if had never lived re-routing = delivering the future = struggling for instance = working at the future = frozen brains = into the context = with our gives = eroding = deprivation = representation = agony of = degradation = seeing from inside = twisted inside = forced to confess = c’est pas grave = tres bien = come along way = starting = colliding world = I shall return = genuine = human values forgotten = loosing myself = medicine for the soul = forced = challenge = escaping from logic = don’t exist = miracle = lets face it = mythology is you/our/my life = what i/you/we see = the way you like to see = expect = finding means = conscious or unconscious = strong and deep = entirely different = coerced = covering = witness = spontaneity = despite = relationship to life = to imagination = softly moving through life not making ripples = we’ll see the spark all around = sunrise = sunset = awaken = a sleep = sparkling mind = sight of insight = see the imagination = play of light = searching for = source of light = not like anything = subtle depths = not like anything else = white light prism sets = capturing light = as a matter of fact = optic nerve = occurring in the mind = beyond vision = traveling backward/forwards = mystery of how = searching for elements = pick it up = what am i saying = inconceivable on = on your side = luminescent = distortion = forum = burst of light = darkness conveying lost in the mouth = forum = darkness = conveying = converging = in advance = new images = refashioning the truth epicurean epigrams = recurring = obsessive = vanity = fair = fair = thinking only believe = fleshing it out still later = there are certain = things unable to believe = simple life getting away = too complicated = quiet one = saying to much = never understood = something you want = wants you = you don’t say = does it matter = not far at all = listen carefully = not going anywhere = some questionable who could do such a thing = heart sank = soulless = scurvily = heartless = heartfelt = where to be = confession = not able to predict = unpredictable = wrapping it up = can’t give up = play for = have to recapture myself facings an illusion = stepping behind and in front = adventure into = so = so what beyond imagination holding out unreasonable hope holding out unreasonable hope = nothing is ever over = nobody there = nothing is no-thing = i wish = you wish = we wish = we made our choices = it’s nothing – you/i/we say = live while you live = warmth disappearing = life into cold = use your imagination = live while you live = a thief robbing life = what is life? something bothering you/me something bothering you/me = attitude = running around in circles = wish you could feel/love/be free = prisoner of success/failure = disappointed in… = caught wrong = there it is touch dancing touch dancing = stretch = stretch out = escape = grown up = out grown = in grown = beginning of an illusion = it’s all so unbelievable = dancing into our own. break clean mask of aggamemnon = no matter what = conspirator = rob malice of its venom = break clean now, here you are dancing with life/death = world go away = take you by the hand = into the future = now, here you are your future troubles me greatly future laden with mystery = peddling illusions = contortionist = little bit of conscious = your future troubles me greatly i’m not making much sense problem of life = if life be = usually unusual = no matter what = incomprehensible = antiseptic = this is no real life = i’m not making much sense language of the soul captured imagination action speaks = escape the quagmire = knowing less and less about more and more = living in the shadows = somebody once said “we are all thieves until we love someone = dancing inside = absorbs the soul = you can almost taste it = journey through sound = haunting vision = seamless = didn’t get to meet yourself = tell me if i’m wrong = thing/feel = captured imagination rising expectations optimism = been here most of my life = many do = rising expectations = what can you do = what you make of it = irony of = i am not your baby sitter = spouting anecdotes = rising expectations don’t you think restoring angst = combustion = i/you/we endangered species = narrow focus = my thoughts turn to you = come back to life = mistreated = could be = don’t you think metaphor for life metaphorically speaking = may we rest in peace = maybe = tell me if i’m wrong = what does it/you/we/i mean = i think it can be = somebody stole your/my body/mind/soul = the sunrises = running against the tide = running = slayer of = life an artifact = artificial = intentionally unintentional = penetrating = self mortification = refugee from life = mourning = metaphor for life thin veneer thin veneer = melancholy remembered = this is no magic = we could, couldn’t we = part of a circus = hiding from your/my self = numb from/for everything = interrupted cycle = invisible veneer = over reacting = you/we/i deserve the truth = seeing through = seeing past = seeing into = seeing beyond = thin veneer of who are we terrorized by innocence separated from yourself = master of self abuse = entwined inside = invisible = hiding from yourself = like a homing pigeon = remains of ashes of innocence = at the stake = do you feel anything = it’s got to stop = courage said enough not enough of too much = i forget just why = handling anger = it’s ok = anything i can do for you = I want… = i forget just why = said enough only message only message = facing consequences = the choice = cost of liberty = held accountable = change attitude = needless to say = you don’t mind = get the message = have a good night from viewers like you looking ahead = low tolerance = rush delivery = call home = made possible = never sleeps = extraordinary = become a member of tomorrow = from viewers like you next time misplaced trust = what passes between us = startling revelations = extraordinary story = tragedy of innocence = misplaced madness = between us = it was the end of the beginning = next time tightrope tricky = where we are going = dial back = make the case = firmly lighted = gone down = lean but not mean = look over there = you shouldn’t have = fresh solutions = oh my goodness = we shall see = tightrope de-evolution thank you = dire and beautiful = shall we see = needs to be = question of… = heart of issue is = other side of evolution = de-evolution accept the unacceptable – the unfamiLIAR the unrecognizable = the unsurmountable = the unexplained = the un becoming = the unacceptable = accept the unacceptable – the unfamiLIAR instead of views = no longer = acceptable = unrecognizable = own terms = entering deeply into… = imagine being me instead of transcend language = emotion = perception = consciousness = unconsciousness = structure = reality = subjectivity = separateness = the object opposites = fusion = re-fusion = nature = life/death = you/my/our/selves = transcend dream like integration of = awake = sleep walking = fluid = back and forth = perceiver = object = motion = emotion = merging beyond imagination = dreamlike is moving verb = entirely fluid = condition facilitates = identities transform = poetry of a painting with words = is moving leap of imagination 3 dimensional = form of idea = uniform = un-in-formed = apparent = apPARENT = intended to think = habit = in later years = separateness = but, can hardly be ignored = stay outside = condition = fostering = rare = to attain dimension requires a leap of imagination dead on arrival out of the womb/water = born with head handed to you = different approach = we can solve problem together/apart = face it maybe we are dead on arrival painting the painter outside the inside = writing the write = dancing on air = inside = spectator to self = spectators no longer exist = painting the painter merging of i/it and eye indeed complicated = recognize things in a sex poem = there can be little doubt = there it is the i/it/you/me all merge within eye overcoming perception subject/object = coming together = look at = change = merge = receive = continue = consciousness = reflex = overcoming perception envisioned ideal = relationship = artist and viewer become one = world of art = obscure boundaries = subject oft an object = object of a subject = dialogue between = envisioned over here objective reality = form and color = interact = detract = retract = painting of subjectivity = forms inside out = expressing spLASHES of color = over here every winter – bending light every winter seems like it never ends = consumed by hatred like it never ends = losing your mind/innocence = difficult to live/die = nobody said a word = can you see what is going on = just thinking about it = bending light a bright little fairy tale = winter never seems to end consumed by hatred you get it = you got it = the thing you were most afraid of looking more like your parents = your dog = growing heavy = soul searching = angry and consumed by anger = look back on/in anger = consumed by hatred stirring uneasily uneasiness within = disparity between you/me/us/they/them = wrapped in own splendor = fashioning illusion ear for = stirring uneasily wrapped in splendor crystallized within = glimpse of something = a promise = unmuttered = unuttered = in solitude is = pieces of life = poetry a mystery wrapped in splendor to survive we need each other to survive = without a rose we can’t do it mirror of humanity inheritance = to survive = in a world of strangers = innocuous = unconscionable and unconscious = angry at = burden of internal identity = mirror mirror = confronting an illusion with an illusion = changing parents/heredity = close to unconscious = psycho babble = war inside = adopt ways of oppressor = life losing you/me = lost family mirror of humanity becoming your/my mother, father don’t know what you’re doing = flashes of memory = fighting for your soul = remember = becoming your/my mother, father so long as the neighbors don’t find out sick of hating = fighting for my/your/our life = please come out = lost in gloom = suspended disbelief = what are you/they/we/i saying = misery keeps us human = so long as the neighbors don’t find out not a real person trying to get away = dangerous interlude = interloper = no place to go = suspended in time/belief = speak for yourself = you’re lucky to be here = be-aware = healing wounds = need i/we/you say more = not a real person spirit through suffering surrender = never galloped in life = where would you go = shrank life = somebodies else words/world = we all have a secret = pain = standing in the dark = don’t think = society makes a ghost of yourself/myself/ourselves = spirit through suffering who is the one who is insane do you see = feel = now do you see = feel = nothing/something = who is the one who is insane black cave of anxiety restore yourself = displacement = fleeting after image = side by side = sleepless = betrayed by innocence = symptom of the despicable = despising = silent terror within = unraveling = invasion of the mind by… the black cave of anxiety invisible witness you/i/we are killing us where did i/you/we go wrong = you never know = comes later = lost way = your/my/our view of the universe = what about the next generation = moth to a flame = you/i/we are killing us = invisible witness peeping over your/my shoulder presently = wings of thought = return in a moment = to the extent that we are all human = can’t stop the drips = i want to be loved by you = perhaps = maybe = find persona = transcend reality = similes smile for you/me/us = no analogy between this and that = nobodies perfect = you are killing me = peeping over your/my shoulder nobodies perfect self conscious = brought out of time = out of time = human? = you-man = a symbol of abstractions = being human = it’s only an image = living in a fake life = over the top = taking toll = taken toll = on mind/heart = can’t help it = pretending your tough = very fragile indeed = dark side of moon = are we/you/i, are we a we = anxiety attack = big responsibility = crucifying our/my/your selves = nobodies perfect longing to be human can’t help it = dream people = it’s only an image = life belongs to…. = pretending = like you/me = = reconciliation of our humanity = commonality = can’t live without = wake up the sun = longing to be human compelled to undress to ee cummings normality = mechanism = finality = to liberate = civilized = uncivil = spectators to a tragedy = outside = stop = think/feel = begin again = feel = however = we begin = no words to explain the unexplainable = compelled to undress you/me/us deluded by dreams Views = honor = integrity = deepened by love = connected = silently expectant = forget my/you/our self = deluded by dreams tree without shadow existence has no-nothing = sound not matching = defining you/my/our image = aren’t really there = losing life because of absurdity = remeber = tree without shadow terrible memory of the night world not fair or just = won’t forget = little center off center = diminished capacity = crimes against our terrible memory of the night who are you who are we = parent to child = child to parent = moving through life = discover what ? = something going on here = what’s true = is it clear = telling the story = want to be perfect (man/woman) = unconditional = pursuit of perfection/love/understanding/success = follow your heart/head/stomach/hormones = who are you ? talk to me are you listening = no alternative = continue to haunt you/me/us = everything you know = have no fear = look around = round and round = out live yourself = what’s it going to be, to be like you/me/us = don’t know what to do = sometimes i do = can’t live with the dead you/me = ready for next adventure = talk to me on the corner of your dream at peace with yourself = who can say = best of times worst of times = who can say = i want to send a message to the future/past = meat on a table = who can say = back of your head = the days may come the days may go = who can say = on the corner of your dreams who stole life beautiful yesterdays = embodying something/nothing = no redemption = space = time = irreversible = testimonial memories = looking back = graveyard of dreams = who will survive you/me/us/they/them/ my heart wants to tell you something we are a family = what makes us a family = passing judgment = not listening = worrying = loneliness = hunger = hormones = longing = creativity = nausea = blood = pain = empathy = apathy = fear = failure/success = intellect/non-intellect = emotions = dreams = thought/thoughtless = open/closed mind = what do you/i/we thing = do we = don’t we = common/uncommon = common uncommon = what do you/i/we stand for/against = past babbling = looking for a place to go = kind-er garden looking for a place to go sooner or later = sooner than later = forever and ever = stop acting = listen = do you hear = yourself/me = new savior = tell the truth = stand still = stop everything = what for = for what = before = sleep in heavenly sleep sensing the impossible upside mission to the impossible dropping our of the past a poetic metaphor for what can before and never more the past when you walk in a dream but you know you’re not dreaming can use logic to justivy anything it is also its flaw logical is illogical on the edge of forever become one of us softly humming a collective enterprise spanning generations with a great passion trying to understand the universe a long journey in to the natural world explore the cosmos … beyond space facing the future in the branch in our power to self distructive plunge our world in to the black hole who are we and on the edge from whence we sprang the ghost of fog horns call in the distance almost at the edge of memories i hear the sounds of what almost apppears to be a distant call calling me back to the sea memories of a life of a wanderer at sea… i listen ever so carefully for what is more imaginary that imagery… to sounds that call me from the fog of my mind a fog horn in the distant background a ghost of long lost dreams and yet i know life is like a distant fog horn and not what it seems trying to penetrate my dreams obody must be forgotten; not even the unforgettable line upon line words upon words letters upon letters piled high to the sky dreamers dream of one day getting beyond the scream of lost illusion piled high up and beyond my eye and i lost in thought and words that can’t seem to be caught and often go nowhere and are for naught i was taught and yet i leaned not what i ought but what i sought so it seems this is what i thought i thought and well i now read nobody must be forgotten not even the unforgettable and so i dream of forgetting the unforgettable before i to enter the forgotten and fade away beyond the line of the everyday where the event horizon meets itself and where time and place and space stand still and memory is frozen as a frostbitten face… and where time and lost illusions are found and the unfindable is dumbfound and i confound myself with all this and that, that would seem to astound maybe some and others this merry go round of words has a play a ring a thing to sing about… and me its just something to play and sing and ding a ling and i ring my mind trying to find the unforgettable before it is forgotten…. echoes echoes from the TV rebound and resound who am i and who might i be in a story about george gershwin on TV he say to my me “maybe i am a family man without a family” “maybe i am a family man without a family” and i hear beyond my ear… beyond my ear to what is dear and near a wound like an arrow pierces my heart burning stiring the flames of an old fear a fear i hide inside while trying to change the truth to fit my ear to fit what i want to hear echoes from the TV “maybe i am a family man without a family…” i ask myself is that me? is that what i need to see is that me and who are you and what is true and who am i and who might i be…. i ask you in me Wrap your mind around this around the unimaginable the incomprehensible before receding and proceeding into the beyond enduring the unendurable painting a picture lost in the silence of the mind into the wind battle for heart and mind against sublime mediocrity making up for lost time eavesdropping on my mind the vulnerable side in solitude i float into the wind of opposites into the irresistible that i resist effortless like a melody the wind dances in the warmth of my mind unfolding oozing out no replacement i don’t know why i long to try something i never had oh where can you be left my body floating in the wind hearing the unheard haunting my dreams can’t take that away from me indistinguishable on an ivory tower came within and from within moved above and beyond in the wind in the voice beyond the voice is the voice a new truth emerges that is beyond itself art music, poetry washes away the dust of every day life the thing that joins us is our common inescapable sadness that rests on the wings of the wind wrapping myself around the wind thinking together as one inside outside the wind is a prayer abandon the search for meaning mean – what it means to abandon life is a novel in a new world the wind is religion the adventure moment to moment as if you never heard before a conversation with the wind aspiring to something beyond what we inherited there is no definition give your life gives you life climbing throught the night i climb i climb like sysiphus beyond the possible i climb i climb like a owl in the night of dream i climb i climb thought the night of visions of possible impossiblitites made possible i climb i climb like tarzan swinging thought time into timelessness i climb i climb in and out of myself and wake up to see the you that is me staring me in the face as i climb and i climb trying to pass myself before i pass myself out of life i climb i climb searching for the unsearchable for the invisible i climb i climb and i climb some more looking for more and more dancing letters into words into space so today like any other day my life seems to be filled with letters into words into space that bounce in and off and out of places that have no place but come from places that are in between my spaces and so as i dance with 26 letters weaving in and out and out and in it occurs to me why on this day of all days do i think about how strange these little dancing ballerinas and bellarinas like letters move in an out and around but how strange they might look to some from a distance land like chinese or greek or russian or arabic looks to me little markings that a child might make and we try and make sense out of a childs play with non-sense and our own sense of verbs and nouns and hanging participles and tense oh what sense is sense i ask myself while looking for some fountain of youth of inner wealth and letters into words into space imagine an imaginary place and then look in the mirror look at your/my/ourselves and we are and have become that which we imagine and live in an imaginary place that is our space a distant dream sitting on the top of a cloud while-ing away undercover of a shroud i think of far away thoughts of what ought and not all for naught listening care-fully to a distant thought beyond me and my what i appear to have caught and try and see into the dream that some would like and others would scream and me i stand their in mirror of my mind trying to find a glimpse far away of place and people that are kind its a distant dream to be who i am, and not what you think i seem is what i mean post mortem of a relation ship looking back from the future past the past what have i we learned from, to do and not to do that is the question… me i learned to decide to stop questioning let go of the never ending monkey on my back that haunts and destroys the past present and future and my joys and tries to be in control, perfect, right and blurr my eye sight in the land of the in the land of the invisible symphony beyond the beyond, beyond knowledge and knowing and unknowing beyond the imagination and the imaginary as butter-flies know not what they know and man doesn’t not know what he knows except of his and other you-mans theories of what is beyond the words that fall from our eyes and out of the mouth of that which the mind conceives and often self-deceives vain in vain and dressed in proud vanity looking for praise and how smart and clever our minds we be like sweet nectar from tuliped flowers drop a delicate perfume that is beyond dreamers dreams harvesting our minds crop a poet leaps into the dark matter of the uni-verse in search of a poetic verse where the invisible energy the black hole of the minds curse we are born to question to search for what is un-search-able for better or worse in a dance for and by chance to stumble on to find a metaphor for sub-stance what came before before and after and further more for that invisible nevernever land which surrounds that which surrounds only to find he has found that which is not to be found a fish in water looking for water looking deep into and beyond himself reflections of reflections in the mirror surrounds dreams of a time past time and timelessness and there in the minds eye many question ask why and if you could close your eye that minds the minds eye and see what there is that is un-seem-able and un-see-able to see one might be surprised to find the un-findable the illusive everywhere and nowhere welcome to the land of the invisible symphony in pursuit of imagination stunned divided united untied un denied dividedly undivided leaving the unimaginable the imagination not after not before stories that curl your hair ominous thought demolition man yes you-man tribute, requium to humanity to be remembered searching for what in the world throwing it the nectar of life all away regurgitating dreams that never where a fairy tale never was essence the spirit of the unfound follow the north star interpreting signs and symbols metaphors trying to find my imaginary you if not me who is you who is emptiness as if sucking the air out of my lungs blown away often wondered jump ship jump ahead forget to forget forget fears, ice tears frozed in time frozen with fear listen listen do you hear the echoes appear whispering in your/my ear we are here we are here all those who we fear why such reality savage brutality battling myself in you walking wounded dazed warriors like a tree with no leaves meaninglessness leads to nowhere the door of no return voices echo beyond the silence words dance in the imaginatary ballroom of my mind and i hear you talking in my mind imagine the the unimaginable life is not a dress rehearsal on a seesaw i see what i saw and in the end everything is reduced to nothing where nothing is everything and everything is everything life burns brightest like lightening frightened by the thunder on the front lines of life words shooting in and out machine guns and bombs dropping here and there and i asleep in a metaphor a dream lying faces down in muddled and befuddled by the overwhelmingness of life waiting for life or something to finally see me i might be you as i talk to myself in my sleeplessness in pursuit of imagination that is unpursuitable as i write to myself in you and i write to you of faint and distant memories vanishing points vanishing from view what is more beautiful the closer we are to each other to life to death to the unthinkable poets dialog with a metaphor profound beauty is discovered in the heart where the imagination wanders —————————————— battles of the mind thunder and lightening battle for light and sound and my mind and a place in timeless time war of mythical figures dancing and throwing the unimaginable uncomprehensible.. i don’t care what science says thunder and lightening are more beautiful and frightening and i whiling away my precious time trying to unwind and in the end of the battle of the mind what does one or i find another battle of a not so kind empty loneliness i sit here looking in the empty mirror of my mind dancing between dreams and reality feeling the emptiness and longingness wondering if and when and where and peeking into you i in the mirror i see my own emptiness trying to escape the boredom of the loneliness the emptiness that fills us all in the end trying to escape and fill it with excitement and anything to escape the voice that echos in my ear yet all i get is more despair and fear rather than wonder and dreams strange we people who are surrounded by people whoare not what they seem feeding on an endlessly diet of mirages a man dying, drowning himself in vanity and glittering abundances inside dying of thirst for love and meaningfulness like a bottomless fathomless hole that nothing can quench can fill the void between the spaces of time and the mind and the rhyme that is no rhyme and me i long for you in me i long for me in you a metaphor to be free as i wait for myself to return to myself someday and for time to stop teasing and playing its little games as i look at over and under myself and the sea of endless waves of ceaseless mindless aimless wanderings wondering about where and when and what makes us us and the loneliness and emptiness that invade us and sweeps over like a heavy dream weighing on me and you and we and in our impenetrable armor of coldness that nothing pierces a childs look in a flash cuts into the heart of our depths ofloneliness silently we huddle together in fear of being near and together and a part as the contradicions battle within a cold shiver breathes heavy over our disillusioned beings afraid of death afraid of life out out damn spot out and from the hole that bore into our soul born out of a metaphor the hole that we came from and return too and the hole that we made in souls that we try and bury in the ground in the sky. oh emptiness where have i been what have i done to my soul… that has filled it with sadness and madness and nienta benzene… i called out to the italian farmer along side the auto strada when i was nineteen and ran out of gas in my first day out with my new used lambretta scooter i bought in milan nienta benzene – i say to the farmer i forgot i needed to feed the soul of the scooter with benzene adnd i was alone and on an adventure that i never returned on my way to venice of dreams with my rubber boat and childhood screams nienta benzene i screamed until the farmer gave me a liter of benzene and i with my undiscovered literati and lambretta limped into varona in the early morning night light a town with out pity and one or two street lights to find the shadows of romeo and juliet every where i turned romeo romeo where for art though and pure innocent juliet’s as i think about love and past loves and what have we done that we have lost and become not one but run on empty and live in the shadows of the nights dark sun and now 35 years later verona is haunted by romeo and juliet and tourist and ghost and pension landlady said to me that this is the room where romeo and juliet slept as i laid my head down to sleep to dream of romeo and julliet and me and little bo peep counting her self in her sheep and now i dream of my own lost illusions and lost loves and innocence and nienta benzene 35 years later… still waiting in the wings for the dream to unfold and to be held and behold and be filled and be fearless and be brave and be bold and later on i heard that every hotel and pension in varona says that romeo and juliet slept here and i dreamed of the wonder of joy and wonder if maybe life is just somebodies toy… and sometimes i listen to the emptiness between the lines and the spaces between you and me and find that there is nothing, nothing but hopeless hope and fear to hear a fear that is too close to near… for i hear we are prisoners of loneliness, emptiness and fear like a ghost reappearing in the nights shadows of my mind i hear the sound of voices of emptiness in my ear… it is my soul crying out in a silent shout… listen here listen hear wake up fear not of fear life is poetry there is poetry in you in me in the way of being in the way of feeling in the way of laughter in the way of crying in the way of tears in the way of fears in the way of listening in the way of dreaming in the way of letting go in the way of holding on in the way of flying in the way of thinking in the way of smelling in the way of hearing in the way of seeing there is poetry in you and me part of the past that never made sense woven into no place validation nobody talking about it memories difficult to learn about actual experience feeling of belonging being heard emotions heard expanding walking alone and together place of refuge grown parts of us are still in prison injustice repeated over again and again victimization alive at some level mixed feeling learn hell through your eyes reverberating rage every right to feel anger language used sold a bill of goods internal threat absorbed evocative to think marching into my self imagining abandoned and why thrown away demand with life refused to fight for being imprisoned abandoned what are you doing here coming to aid using mind as a shield conscious talking about self racism trying to be invisible makes you wonder seed of self hatred filtered living in history see the fear in the heart trying to be released from the past multiple traumas terrorized lost with out a clue looking for the words i need to say horrific doesn’t do justice absence the missing of healing the soul unresolved conflict not represented self clearly to myself making self too important rage not about me assumptions safe haven giving up life need to experience life to fullest two worlds struggle with coming from the belly historical reality battle going on… between myself ways of surviving believing in some form of justness protecting the self the past from the past avoiding conflict experience facet of same experience way view the world nobody wrong stand by me with me bringing who we are to who we are who stands by you and me in this moment life brings us to this moment its not me is what it is feeling of abandonment constantly with us needing to be in control at all cost the longest walk to reach myself able to live up to expectation hope for solidifying huge gap growing distance growing invisible self loathing of being self mutilating to look like everyone else looking to make everything wrong goes in many directions crying for the child within letting go of the self confusion in a confused world a part of our common experience crossing over tossed about in a sea of symbolism stepping into the child within longing for innocence violated living up to some image scars left wisdom of the unconscious spontaneous discovery representing the journey holding on to and lost what need to let go of lost child hood innocence letting go of shame letting go of the mask the costume changes the personalities let go of something of idea something wrong the defense be freed up not trapped be who meant to be relief to be celebrate yourself lost words words fall like rain from the sky from my mouth from my mind and from beyond lost words like lost time dancing on the edge dangling like participles parting the waves parting the lines between lost moments between words strung together into and out of forgotten dreams lost in a jungle words swinging from trees springing on a vine devine searching for the sublime trying to define the ageless wondrous mysterious lost words convergence of opposites above and below the old and the new yesterday and tomorrow opposites attract on a long journey running underground absorbing tunneling beyond drop by drop entering into the transported underworld lured in search of the unknown discover no one can explain why adds to the myth fountain of opposites blind leading the blind escape route come and go never know where end up where life flourishes invisible threat as time moves on into itself percolating seeping invisibly penetrating into and out of up and down the food chain flourishing inverted pyramid harvesting invisible foiled empty way to overcome challenge of obviousness spreading the message a magical illusion unforgiving environment trying to find a way trying to not drown alien environment remarkable returning to the place of before birth gathering in cool currents hungry devoured by own protection fatal mistakes fending for self moving closer to the inevitable burried magical mystical powerful puzzle erupting in the impossible to fight against delving beneath the depth openings into the underworld no easy way out new world comes to light finding life in the pitch darkness no apparent life a microscopic horizon chain of consequence time running out discovering more secrets mysterious maze that hide secrets what do the dead remember life before, after or during and then there is death fearing life fearing death and what do we take from and before and into the after and then and then what is memory and where is memory and what is remembering and what is life and living and where do we come from that we go to.. and where is where and why do we care… and what is fear and what and why do we not dare to live to bare to care to remember to forget to forget to remember refugees from life tortured in the soul by deeds of dreadfulment invisible hand great bond which we have nights black agents things bad begun things strangely born and how do we grieve double double toil and trouble come high and low beware of vanity chafes and threats comes like shadows horrible sites dreaded exploits no medicine to cure deadly grief to damn oneself with a grief that converts to anger to damn oneself out out damn spot and the night that is long that never finds the day what’s done cannot be undone i think but dare not speak to live a lie and then to die what do the dead remember what do we remember in our heart of hearts a smile when one knows a little laughter when it snows the warmth of another when love grows the sun when it glows the sweet smell of a rose who knows victim of delusion victim of self victimization shared experience convergence breaking news like nobody elses business stark reality putting at risk victimized in the dark special report masquerading to look natural no one can tell the power of many merge can’t begin to understand big risk but have to take back life intimate moment pressure to make the future right distractions presence of mind premeditated murder of innocence on trial by the soul rage against the profound taken over by grief pretending not to know loved life something missing take a few minutes and try and imagine the last few minutes of your life smile in my mothers eye on the F train returning from the womb i came from poetry in motion “Let Me Think” and makes me think and feel as the train speeds along and the breaks squeal and i speeding around in my minds eye visions of my mothers smile at seeing her son and daughter take off and fly and i knowing her inside of me and me inside of her eye for we come from each other and now watching time fly beyond why not diminishing the gleam in her eye one can not deny but i know some day a tear will drop from the place beyond high and time will come and go and then the moment of the dreaded last good-bye as i look inside my eye and squeeze the last moments i try not wanting a part of me to die as i in my minds eye hear her imaginary last war cry trying to hold on to remember the sparkle in her eye and wonder why sometimes we lived a lie as i watch another tear drop in the fallopian tube pass bye and prepare myself for what we all know – to die trying to comprehend the mortality of why returning back to the memory of the smile in my mothers eye and imagine the look that takes the fire out of this confusing quagmire and wonder at the wonder of a mothers tenderness as i reflect back to before the beginning to a time when i was a gleam a smile in my mothers eye come linger a while with me come linger with me in the warmth for a while under heavy judgment the instruments of darkness the winds betray us horrid image know at wits nothing is but what is not come what come may wrought with things forgotten nothing like in life as in leaving it let light not see the light of darkness the milk of human kindness though will be great but not with out ambition on mortal thoughts heaven corrupts the whole in the darkness feel the future a face like a book what is done is done be all and the end all return to plague fatal vision dagger of the mind take the present horror words to the heat of deed summons to heaven or to hell mac beth does murder sleep and innocence and shall no sleep know more eye of child that fears the devil be lost in thought provokes and un provokes almost slipped the hour horror of horrors confusion has made its masterpiece nothing serious in mortality fountain of blood is stepped daggers in men smiles theft which steels itself when no mercy left troubled with set up self in hope master of own time not thickens nights black day things bad begun make something are better left unexplained other things are better left un said and others better left dead an well somethings are just better not fed sending love letters to myself believe me believe you too many horror stories want to begin at the ending change the way we see the world let us forget for in forgiving and forgetting we are free free from grieving for a we that maybe never was we and never will be let us forget so we don’t forget to be let us forget so we can again see let us forget what never was and was not meant and never will be let us forget shed the skin so we can begin and let us forget what a sad state we are in let us forgive ourselves for the sin of damaging the child of innocence within let us forget where we have not been let us forget to not forget what we should forget and rest the soul so torment and delusions can depart let us forgive till death do us part and make our lives an art who are we who are we who are we i ask myself in the mirror of your eye who are we who are we come the reply i defy the lie of my minds eye who are we who are we i ask myself in the mirror of my I why oh why do we deny the truth that we all living a lie and can’t fly and can’t fly who are we who are we i ask my self in the mirror of you and i wonder who am i who are you… why i get down on my hands and knee and look up at the sky and wonder who what where and why why i and you live and die and wonder why we laugh and cry and sigh and turn a blind eye and a tough guy and a wise guy and a blue sky and why others mindlessly comply and i hereby and thereby and whereby ask why stand by please stand by why say goodbye —————–check two of the same——————– pieces of a sort noble legacy large figure joined at the hip ask question heir apparent who makes the choice haven’t discussed how we will discussed embarrassment of riches not an easy choice never called wouldn’t know how that would turn out didn’t discover i was a lifer until i was a lifer recognize something about self half thought out get self in position life writing didn’t have in gut conviction not responsible to opinions yeats – let her think opinions are a curse on a parade untimes like second to none haven’t quite replaced myself testing limits exist for who investing in judgment what really matters sense of proportion part of who we are engaged with the world not settled ultimately what we are judged by is how we engage the world shaping events trying to make sense out of a complex world pieces of a sort having all that you/ we have seen the dilemma not sure thought way through never the less recognize its still there not to eager hard to give it a rest present in the eyes of people fountain of youth the future tastes the good bad and the ugly apologist who sanitize apocalypse critical to remember accommodate the future making a difference want a better future bringing together illusions paradoxes when all said and done do the right thing ================================ change way see the world stumbling on the future wedded to old way why not not provided for great shock grow up all of sudden without preparation no surprises sense of importance want more interest or obsession on the look out willow of a wisp abandoned history new improved threatening to smother last gasp of life’s rage vented on the world about to disappear into and out of smothering myself in by threats and fears fears imposed and self imposed i dance between the waves of imaginary threats in memory and in memories of ghosts of lost illusions day in day out death makes equals of us all a distant planet treasure beyond price the gift of life the good and bad endless quest for the nectar of life world beyond holds wonders and surprises seeking shelter from smothering brutal test time of peril surrendering to the flame under the barrage spirit that holds the scales of life and death the onslaught beneath the scalding smothering giving up the last elixir of the soul succumbing to the assault smother underneath the weight of weightlessness wandering known only to myself little notice refuge out of reach prowling not worth the effort not worth the risk in a deadly game aware of the dead leave the gift to the living survivors move on prospects of smothering looms beyond the horizon knows the pain no room in the world windows on another horizon clinging to life until extinction closes upon itself bold expressions of life days will soon pass fragile reasserting great and small across the sea of time facing the world entrust meek and mighty come and go one life is one life world vast fraught with peril refuge for wayward and the lost the turtle the turtle as if in another time zone dances between space and spaceless space in search of slows to a plotting pace endless miles of floating mirages surrendering to journeys end further and further like a mirage escaping the trials in the shell of timelessness ends of the earth lonely fragment of former self caution born of experience torturous and painful existence or not moving forward in the same space deep yearning overcoming obstacles part of the world existence reflected inherent responding to the challenges distinctive riding out life becoming who i am who i am who you are process of self discover striving to make mistakes humbling period of disguises expressing who i am not trying to be somebody else core the soul the essence that comes through in an unforgettable and forgettable memory witness to existence for good or for bad pretending to die misbegotten and misforgotten gossamer like bond goodness in you in the trust comes the release and freedom holding the mirror up great art holds the mirror up to ourselves to myself life changes life hold this thought become a listener fall in love with yourself with who i am becoming bring yourself look at life in different way light up the way believe in the unbelievable live on through art moved by touched by legacy explain who i was know not when life well lived live life well i was here not be ashamed who i am detached consequence of our voyage legendary navigator a matter of wonder standing guard exhausted cut off trapped on a barren island of the mind never resolved where we came from sailed against the prevailing winds two way voyaging coming and going backwards and forwards foot prints descending detached islands hoping to find bring islands to you only world afraid of the world losing the meaning disintegration misplaced increasing and diminishing haunted fragments ghosts of the past do what the skeptics think is impossible way of life way of conducting yourself personal quest the challenge of life draw near catch yourself rights of passage be in command of yourself find way through the impossible keep the vision in your mind if you lose that you will be lost the dignity the gift of life become your own family know who you are tried to make sense the sense of nonsense incensed and intense makes no sense maybe it just me that i am dense or maybe its you who is sitting on the fence or maybe i am just too intense and i can’t see my own defense anyway when i commence and try to make sense things get tense horse sense, condense and pretense too much suspense and not enough common sense, future tense, in a sense, or moral sense, statutory offense in any sense and at any expense i have tried to make sense is my only defense Fast food can kill you. hoping not to hear the worst headlines catch my attention 5 Killed and 2 Hurt in Robbery at Queens Wendy’s and i remember being also a local resident who was on his way to pick up his morning coffee at the McDonald’s restaurant, two doors down from the Wendy’s, stopped and tried to make sense of the robbers’ motives. and me i write a poem called tried to make sense which makes no sense then herded seven employees into a walk-in refrigerator in the basement, bound them with duct tape, shot five of them fatally and wounded two and what about the two guys who did it were they not also wounded damaged touched amazed at their own brutality and for what and who and the families.. and me and you no there are many victims here… and there… and what about the society that produces people like you and me who can do this and that and where does it come from and go too as the man said, “tried to make sense” and i in my way say we are all pretty dense can’t we see that who we are is who they are and look at you and me are we not or are we more free ??? but they are us if we look deep inside our own disappointment and despair and try and see that they are we… and then it goes on Just before 7 a.m. today, a police bloodhound apparently picked up a scent, but the outcome was not known. But in the small hours of this morning, a few friends and relatives of the employees who never returned went to the restaurant, hoping not to hear the worst Dawn usually brings bustle and trade to Main Street, the heart of the busiest shopping district in Queens with a polyglot of the bizarre bazaar Five television antennas pointed at the sky, where several news helicopters buzzed overhead. At 5:45 a.m., the last body was pulled out of Wendy’s restaurant and the police reopened the street to traffic. The garbage trucks made their belated rounds. while people on the merry-go-round went around and around Can’t even get a burger without being gunned down A cook at McDonald’s “I’m so frightened, especially when you know they’re still out there,” “Fast food can kill you.” and i reflect on the poetry of the statement and rush to catch the wave of life in a fine line before it loses its shine another employee at McDonald’s jumped in to agree. “Yes, very dangerous,” she said. She displayed some jagged teeth that she said were broken in 1991 when she was working down the street at Kentucky Fried Chicken and a man came in and beat her with a sub-machine gun. But the killings came at a time when the city’s murder rate was already rising this year in1998, six murders occurred during a 24-hour period on May 13 and 14. Overall violent crime, however, declined by 7.5 percent during the first three months of this year. what does it all mean as i hear and imagine the silent scream and the end of many a dream i hear a voice inside ask what does it all mean ————————- sense of otherness warping emotional reflexes and leaving behind a permanent sense of otherness and alienation. induced to succumb to the spell melodramatic excesses, “The Binding Chair” never devolves into simple soap opera overlapping stories of two women whose lives mirror and counterpoint believes that he can save May from her past escaping into a dream world where memory can be blurred if not erased defiance allows herself to be abducted ultimately estranges Cutting back and forth between a world in which women are brought up to please and service men, a world in which class and sex determine one’s fate tries to escape her destiny and though she eventually flees to the south of France with Arthur’s family, her damaged feet are a constant reminder that she comes “from another world.” cross paths orchestration of these people’s intersecting lives is clumsily stage-managed, emotional insight and plain old storytelling verve into an involving work of fiction. ————————– save you/myself from the past – mistaken past and mistaken identity past the past and past mistakes of mistaken identity i struggle with illusions of and beyond while dreaming of moments that could have been trying to free the angel from the stone within trapped in a revolving door in your/my mind thinking the past could be changed and that the future was to be gained but alas and alac delusions attract and detract as i in my way got lost i must say thinking i could believing i could save you/myself from the past but again alas it did not last as if cast in stone from stone to stone what i have learned and you/i have shone once a drone always a drone and i return from being alone to al-one as again i escape into myself and into a dream world where memory can be erased if not blurred and maybe at last i have learned what has been my lifes burden my task can’t save you/me from the past —————————– evaporated – “The stars are beautiful, because of a flower that cannot be seen.” preface imagine the little prince if he had met a little flower princess… what his little princess would have been like and how he would have cared and treated her like a rose…and how the little prince and princess would have lived with their as joseph beuys said in his first documenta social sculpture titled “without a rose we can’t do it”… no grown-up will ever understand that this is a matter of so much importance! evaporating from view ——————————– crucified on a shadow can the mind be at rest to find peace of mind to be at rest tearing self apart with answers and un answers is there an answer that rests the mind thirsty for understanding piece of the piece of peace mind never rests restless in its search for itself the unknowable the incomplete the indescribable the un-doable and un-un-doable valley of the stone of heart being part of the tragedy outcast without hope crucified on a shadow progress and mature by errors know the world we live in challenging the mind honor well for a few hours let mind be at peace peace and peace makers to bare witness at the mercy of self tyranny to bare nothing but distrust not even love while becoming the thing we destroy hatred turns us to stone have lost you/me to the past that we hold fast to bare the unbearable with out knowing… the arm of quiet to go no further to be locked out of the door of peace of mind the world is more than we know a moment of silence for memories of innocence for the blind for what cause are we brought into the world thunder and lightening give the mind a rest dragged into the world if i would have know what i was getting into what i know now and all the this that and the how i would have fought the fight of my right to be or not to be rather than be subject to a life of contradictions frictions and fictions addictions, afflictions, constrictions, convictions, depictions, evictions, restrictions to name a few that stifles me and you if i only knew what life is and what it is that we do and what to do what to do i would have had to be dragged into the world you see monopoly on information who own my thought and what i think i think very carefully where thought came from and where i am going and the thought that some body has a monoploy on what i think is a dreadful thought i think and then again… who has taught me and what is thought but a combination of experience, feeling and information and remembrances of things past and not yet come and wonder and dreams and dancing between the spaces of thunder and lightening of my and your mind and someone has now claimed to find my gold mind and claimed a monopoly on my thought and with out a thought for my thought about it and well for ought or naught i have only one thought about a monopoly on information if they look inside my mind they will find lots of nothing i have caught… what is love love is a question and what is, is the answer and what is love, love is a contradiction benediction, crucifixion, dereliction, drug addiction, interdiction, jurisdiction, conviction, affliction, constriction, depiction, eviction, infliction, nonfiction, prediction, restriction, and science fiction what is love ?? all of the above paralyzed by uncertainty paralyzed by perfection and un-divided attention and insurrection and defection i object to objection ejection of disconnection resurrection, of introspection and by unintentional consequences and matters of consequence and paralyzed by being paralyzed and the unknown and the unknowable and the certainty of uncertainty is certainly an uncertainty paralyzed by uncertainty foot in life boat your soul row row row your boat life is but what we dream alchemy of language liberating our true selves dreams reveal possibilities breathing the air take charge of own future personal journey times winged chariot at my heals tiniest things have the universe on wheels affairs of the heart who knows not who you think i am inspired to be somebody never judge a book by its cover who was i not who i was nobody fits in one day wake up sometimes don’t know where i start and you start life is not a rehearsal privilege is a prison responsibility to myself not allowed real feeling don’t know who me is falling apart nobody free don’t know much about self pontificating integration of emotions finding self relying on out outmoded versions of self have to rely of things of the heart airy fairy nonsense to walk in my own way and my heart cries out what about passion what about honesty parting is such sweet sorrows worlds apart at some point need to face what is inside of us not a fairy tale this is real life ordinary lives are extraordinary dreams are what we make of our lives on a journey of the heart throwing stones at the mirror managing to stay human aching, sad story we have to come to terms with de-humanizing humanity like an infant, in terror price society/we seemed to be paying crisis of tribal mentality illnesses of ethnic intolerance/hatred results can be devastating hopes and fears suffer needlessly, toll of grief and anger etched in faces objectify – stop torturing weeping at the memory end their lives prematurely mental suicide inhuman, non-human, sub-human on the edge Burning in hell throwing stones at the mirror into the future callousness, ruthlessness, horrified Denied a Peaceful Passing miserable life enemy of you-manity no greater risk tribal mentality nationality, irrationality, invincibility, survivability, incompatibility, indestructibility, inevitability, invulnerability, brutality, banality, bestiality, duality, fatality, finality, morality, immorality, mortality, immortality, venality, commonality, criminality, triviality, unreality, profanity – insanity of vanity improve communication celebrate differences common humanity more important than difference falling in love with the soul the deed is done and done indeed as hearts and souls bleed in its search for food for the soul in search to be whole we are who we are not glimpses of who we are in the mirror and reflections of who we are not between the eyes and all the lies and who we are is not what we show woe is woe when we don’t know is what i now know who we are to others is an appearance like winter snow how many can say we are who we are not what we know and who is it that we fall in love with appearances like actors in a sitcom show or maybe its the glimpse of ourselves in the mirror of another soul that we hope will make us whole if our love was true if our love was true to our soul it would have made us whole … not a commodity in some game of getting the brass ring the goal… if our love was true it would have been stronger than me and you… if our love was true it would have been made in heaven and not so thin that we would not have been lost but found brother sister father mother in ourselves as kin… if our love was true through and through, i would not have to say goodbye to you howling at the moon wolf howls in communication with itself howls at the emptiness at society loneliness ripple through time right to be free compelling transparent the mind beyond and by itself howls filling the empty spaces in search of finding communion and reunion with itself peace of mind looking, listening finding echoes beyond the emptiness in the mirror of myself shadows appear in the moonlight listen can you hear me/yourself howling at the moon escaped into own being mind and soul core of humanity where we come from and belong longing to return to myself to nature to not be homeless in own mind, body, being escaping the world of strange illusions that make me a stranger to myself right to be free from intrusion escaping into the mind of the universe into the indescribable the consolable lost in a fetal position in a dream crawling back into the womb beyond what is beyond refuge in the warmth between sleep and wake inside my soul your soul the soul that has no words or form or space or time or being or non-being the soul that is and is not that has everything and nothing but is what is in all living nature… beyond thought and words and exists inside and fills the spaces that has no spaces… the soul that fill the poetry that has now words to rest in between the spaces inside a warm sea in the placental oceans that gave birth to life that is beyond time and space escaped into disappeared into myself preface to i myself did myself deceive no more in my eye where the road takes a Y i understand why its time to fly to questions of why and i and say goodbye i myself did myself deceive so as i come to the end i seem to find myself inside myself listening to strange thoughts that have invaded my being illusions of times that fed delusions freeing my soul from memories of what may never have been saying good bye to confusions and mistaken shadows of you/me/us listening to words that echoed and reverberated past visions past times and memories… of what was or was not us jumble of contradictions that were misread and mislead feeding myself in a tragic comedy of errors listening to my soul cry out treason lost in a divided beyond reason begins another season in the long run when all is said and done and i am sitting in the warmth and quiet of the sun when what is done is done and nobody has won and gone is the memory of a loved one and what was thought of as well begun was just another dry run i understand as you tried to tell me/yourself you where not the one to be at one and that it was over and done and i couldn’t believe my ears and heart could deceive that which the little prince and you and i did weave and believe but now like water through a sieve i find reprieve, time does relieve, time to be free and move on from the dream of illusions that seem i didn’t understand or know what they mean time to take leave and find myself, to retrieve what i believe and no longer be part of that which i did perceive but now i know the truth i myself did myself deceive fallen heroes order and system fallen ideas witness fall of nation state in decay waking the imagination see beyond end of nose see beyond the beyond calm and tranquility keeping soul and body alive snippets of this that and the other things not a trace left standing the gaff turning upside down injecting revitalized overlap reconciliation of corruption indirectly or at first hand history of idea the word go question has been much influenced never spoke to the world dawn to decadence taking the leap find something you love doing challenging the being who it makes you become a stereotype of myself inspired to noble things complicated true or not true is another thing pretend that nothing is happening going from crisis to crisis turning against self failure not an option the dilemma small details can reveal the origins of darkness crucifixation can not disguise draw little comfort fires the imagination endure greatest threat doubt a place of magic wrong about self searching for the way through meaning of the future if this is the future i reject it here the line is drawn to fight the future feeling of loss unbearable nothing can console out of pain something comes optimism in the depths of despair fallen heroes can never die they often live a lie and don’t know why authors note – reflection on lost illusions i sit inside myself reflecting reflection on lost illusions past the past and a love that was a love at last and though i know not why it didn’t last as i wonder to and fro and where i have been and so and so i sit and write this for you (who may read my poems) to know my poems of last though often written very fast have emptied my life’s wine cask of this strange unending task of trying to find what causes my soul to have a hole that has left me like a strange blind mole in a deep grieved hole for my soul again mis-read and was mis-lead by wanting to be whole but in the end i lost myself and lost what friendship i did extend and in the process lost what i once was thought a good dear friend that i can no longer befriend, a sad and bitter end nor can i pretend to defend for in the end nothing can mend for the trust that once was given as a friend is now a dead end but i did discover that i not only was deceived by myself and caught in the web i weaved the i that i perceived and what i believed conceived, preconceived and misconceived, and have sadly and sometimes gladly grieved, for what has been has been, and done the deed my soul and heart sadly proudly did bleed for to loose myself in a sorrowful story i did plead for my soul to recede and let me be freed but no in its need to enter deep into the maddening rush that nothing could intercede and my heart, mind and soul took no heed it was caught in the stamped of sadness like the madness of greed and held on tight indeed as i again did plead to concede for what was done was done indeed and could not be undone no matter what the seed many times i did plead with my heart and soul to recede for my vitality was in need but my heart would not heed it had to pluck out the last remaining weed and so now i know i have finished, dug above and below and tried to grow into the person i am, i know the end in the end is the beginning and what is past is past and not meant to last and so i move on slow and fast leaving behind a piece of my soul my mind trying to find a place that is more kind for i have been as usual a little blind but in ending the end i have learned a little more about life and who i am that i now comprehend no rhyme nor reason for my transgressions (crossing the line) or my passions i defend like the willow tree in the wind i bend feeling lifes wind where it decides i fly low or high in joy or sadness i sigh a sigh of relief with a little tear in my eye for having made the truth a lie for a little bit of me and you does live and die what reason i don’t know why but now life calls, grieving ends as it began, for what was a dream a little lie as i move on from why and say a fond farewell and a good goodbye failure to listen character in soap opera try to be more thoughtful i thought and now i listen between the lines and spaces between all that there is and is not and i wander back and forth like the river of time in search of listening to the opening of the mouth of the river of rivers as waves of thoughts come over me and time moves and ebbs and flows and i listen i am listening i say to myself to my mind to my body and yet i can’t hear or understand what i am saying to myself as if i am a stranger is a strange land in a language that is full of incomprehensible fragments of fragments mortifying to open our inner lives to scrutiny endlessly curious advertised falsely myth of enduring romantic love reached an uneasy truce in empirical forays into the analysis criticism, defensiveness, contempt and stonewalling. anger, and belligerence to validation, humor, joy and surprise what to do when the audience goes home get down behind my eyeballs like a fisherman failure to listen failure of empathy you just love the sound of your voice who are you in love with created an image which you adore emotional terrain existential belief that no one listens to anybody communication is a becoming, not a being strong feelings about being and not being endless siege of issues separateness rather than We-ness shone light into deep fracture lines not even conscious looking back longingly frightening exposure of the deepest self The confessor looks into the darkest regions of the human psyche, uncovering embarrassing secrets not only what you have actually done, but also what you wanted to do. entertain impure thoughts And so, seek refuge in euphemisms and abstractions and, above all, avoid being heard or hearing yourself outside the confessional a burning need outer life versus inner life torturer penitent, frighteningly immoral ultimate truth of our interior life is our absolute poverty, our radical dependence, our unquenchable thirst, our desperate need to be loved. Silent wonder a child before a world too confusing to understand natural response to a revelation surpasses all words, a beauty that is beyond images eloquent dramatists, the language of the inner life serene silence, a deep hurt, a boundless desire and, occasionally, a little laughter. if one must say anything at all, what better way in a few words protect the infinite majesty the mystery of the inner life between you and the mystery with which, somehow, you have become the mysteries of mystery as i become my own history dancing between the you and the mystery which is between here and there and everywhere i wonder about what will become of that which became and that which will becoming and when the mystery will be succumbing and when time and the timeless will be one and about the mystery with which somehow, you and i have become hanging on to yourself i sit here in a dream wondering what does it and life and me and you all mean as time marches to strange drummer beats and i do incredible mind gymnastic feats only to find that in the end i have been running around with my feet and shoes tied together and that what i once thought as neat is now really just conceit so i sit here inside out wondering about as i try and shout hanging on to yourself before the bout and trying to figure what all this and that is about letting memories die walking back to slavery swing low sweet chariot waiting for to carry me home out of bondage struggling with mirages coming for to carry me home forbidden emancipation on the verge let it shine spare nothing expending night riders burning to the ground stranded in times like these rotting away wind whistles and groans had been slaves fearing ridicule disgrace more to it than that stereotypical crushed by time to root the dark past things to be forgotten steel away home think about what your thinking out of touch with reality encountering confronting muttering agitated effected avoiding burning up nothing further product of imagination fantasy can’t predict based on own experience visceral reaction challenge preconceptions arousing a reaction taken literally provoke discussion doesn’t surprise acting on impulse foresee potholes objectified reality not gotten off the ground mind racing heart pounding not about freedom of expression paving the way not an excuse step into my shoes take a good look —————————— > * revolution/change starts when you have no fear to die > > * control and communism/totalitarinaism are based on fear by the > population… > > * even one man can free themselves from the terror of fear and make a > difference… look at Gandhi, martin luther king, and millions we never > hear about… > > * free of your own implanted terror…. > > * when you are not afraid of death you are free even though your body > might be imprisoned or controlled… > > * get rid of that which is destroying you > but now as i > restore myself and find my voice and the lion within and stop being the > concerned fearful not want to loose you/me the dream… > > taking back fearlessness…thought i was fighting for love and maybe i > was like don quiyote fighting my fears and figments of my imagination and > fear of loneliness and dying alone and fear of losing or not loving and > fear of fear… and with a tear i tear myself/you out of my soul and heart > and the figment of my imagination dis-appears only to re-appear as myself > in myself ——————————– can’t believe what my eyes see dedicated and stimulated from the film Witness:Voices from the holocaust can’t believe can’t believe what to believe in and why death march dying left and right can not do it anymore resigned decimated cannibalism of the mind pile of moving corpses premonition is this really happening living skeleton can’t believe its real incredulousness alone in the world no place.to go nobody to talk to lost without words what happened don’t want to live with pain can’t erase scared human being among human being who am i am i that how should i feel never found the answer in my own soul waste time in hate nobody to share your sorrow or happiness do we learn… and when will we learn the desert i defend a miracle that was never meant to be wrapping brain around don’t have right to question never expected this don’t know never give up are you sure serving an unknown agenda that was not meant to be think i would like to be alone why create a life that is meant to die i ask why in the quiet of my inner eye begins where it ends soul unbound unseen charter less waters no more or less reaching the beginning before the end can no longer deny the future alone i stand before you wearing my bones on the outside waiting for the beginning to end Fear lives inside dark side of my heart Fear lives inside dark side of the heart words from a page shoot inside out i think about the truth of it and i want to shout why oh why as i hear the dew drop of a tear and the mind repeats no reason to fear fear unclear so far and yet too near prisoners of fear that lives inside the dark side of the heart i/we hear deniers deny, liars lying. violence of fear is still flying. Fear of this darkness. fear of starkness a Fear you will never get out. sounds of a soundless shout the face of despair, alive and behind in every dark corner, under every bed in the mind lies like an dormant volcano unless you are blind imprisoned – with the stain damaged by life, retreated again to some distant point of pain battle worn no winners no loser no gain torn by fear of the endless black rain Death and fear entwine searching for escape into the sublime nobody’s conscience is entirely at peace a victim of hesitation that does not cease trying to squeeze the life from fear before we are decease descending into a dark place into hells cage crazed, with unjustifiable rage stunned beyond belief lost in self grief fear tiptoes into the innocent mind like a nightmare molester does it damage and then festers and on the other side of appearances the court jester jesters while inside oblivion craved trapped and depraved without hope looking to climb jack in the been stalks rope only to find oblivious Oblivion without and within trying to find some light, something the mind craves to believe in and escape the minds darkest fear of infernal damnation, and dantes inferno of sin imminently forgettable the flavor of the day then and i have to say things that are imminently forgettable are often imminently regrettable and sad but true that what we are me and you is often not very true if we review our lives most of the time we look for simple answers to the rhyme like money, power, and some con line we design our selves to fit into such small boxes that we think we are sly like foxes but actually we are a mirage a collage, a barrage, self sabotage full of vanity and empty pretense trying to sit on the fence of life with out realizing we are sitting on a razors knife and all for what, a minutes mirth and a life time of strife to live and die imminently forgettably forgettable when what we want to be is unregretably unrespectable be careful you get what you wish for voice on the tv says be careful you get what you wish for you could lose your mind what goes wrong poor communications fatigue address the address wondering what to do another ploy once again just begun see what you can do take breathe away plug into world insufficient language in the waste land carried away to different playing fields time running out when all is said and done little more then wishful thinking dreams are what makes reality reality reaching into the mind into the dream into the moment serendipity of dreams sounds of a cloud in theory glimpse of a hint perhaps escape reality fragments out of the dream actors in our own memory unraveling memory judge and jury blocking out don’t know about distortions mind of dreams at work vomiting up memories life devoted to words in the primal garden eating and drinking own thoughts and lines and lies coming back in my own head an identical twin with myself telling stories dreams make things up and time has no time for time its all a mystery the revolution is no longer a revolution i read about the mighty and powerful peoples revolutions of iran, cuba, china etc that is supposed to better the people for and by the people and i think what has gone wrong and why and what started out as something full of hopes and aspirations in the hearts minds and bodies of people like me and you to have a fairness and fearless life and get out of the spiral the cruel stew and i think how things turn and turns around and around in and after time to be a rerun of yesterdays news as the peoples revolution is no longer in evolution but in power of the powerless and no longer for you and me but for the seemingly all powerful and their power to be and so we see and should learn that today’s revolutionaries are tomorrow’s tyrants and what’s going to happen to those who us who are like you and me stolen shadows of Socrates thought shadows of Socratic thought stolen as a thief steals piece of mind in the night shadow dancing on the walls of my minds cave listen!… to Socrates ghost laugh at my/your clinging to illusions to the shadows in dis-belief as thoughts race around and around inside and out hummingbirds dancing between the spaces of my mind here there everywhere the real me/you now lost, hidden somewhere between the shadows of stolen thoughtless thought and the thought of thought success as an albatross around the neck.- disguised monologues disguised monologues danced self between life and to death heaven and hell and where do we dwell and what and why and where for do we worship success and before i begin i must confess in a Dionysian ecstasy order and restraint replaced tired of being saturated with messages of the endless success of failure no more of this overfeeding feeding frenzies of piranha and sharks transition from opulence to severity discovery of the past we are essentially powerless to express anything at all is the subliminal message sensation produced by contemplation and temptation around in a merry-go-round interplay of archetypes and architectural forms. fascinated with words set in motion by sounds and rhythms of the syllables and symbols dancing with ghosts that have long departed and not yet born as i in a disguised monologue i am having with myself and the albatross that lives inside all of us assumes the position – ATTENTION HUP” i can still hear the echoes of the boy scout drill leader salivating to be free from hope and success and worshiping false idols i take the albatross into my inner sanctum of lost illusions where ghosts of Homer’s Iliad and ulysses roam on a voyage past memories and the straits of the sirens inside myself fighting for survival with the shadows of mirages of one eyed cyclops and the albatross of success comes and becomes to me and tries to seduce me with dreams of success and reflects in the eyes looking back at me in mirror of time – confess! i am seduced by success listen carefully… i hear a voice from inside the voice… listen carefully before the future becomes the past wake up before the last gasp comes at last success is not success existence of the apparent woke up from a nap to some form of a mindless rap and apparently the existence of existence and of apparent appeared in an apparition a dream but to my intuition the apparent is neither father nor mother is inconsistent and neither is nor and definitely not a parent for sure looking for some clarification or something a little more than more while thinking about the gravity and gravitational forces that effect neither and nor and apparently for sure apparent must exist or why would it insist and resist that is, it is or isn’t apparently so and i, to my self – what do i know which proves conclusively inconclusively that existence is the parent of apparent POEM the conjunction of two selves Without each other, both are incomplete souls. lacked something the other had merge into one individual searches for their own selves sometimes leads to nothing but despair and other times realization – one only truly becomes an individual when joined as one merge once again. merely an extension of oneself handed a dream. imagination restricted raised to be an extension of strange inhabitants inhabit the mind visitors and visions like in an absolute dream one world with out words. sit still as dawn. listen to the silence between your thoughts make it clear in these instances one is “each one lacked something the other had “something” neither small nor insignificant. two facets of the same being conventional and unconventional settled. and unsettling each feels in the other’s subconscious the color of comfort desire to merge to melt into one being magnetic attraction of evolution two facets thrive individually and become one. secretly proud calm controlled uncontrollable, compassion passion as water closes peacefully over the turbulence turning itself inside out in search of contentment in search of not searching difficulty distinguishing one’s thought from the other like having a conversation with self conjoined washed over and melted into a union that has no words peacefully suspended beyond in a moment of being one and at one while floating on a cloud that transforms one person out of two individual selves Without each other, both are incomplete souls. Expected to Recover in critical but stable condition desert Mirage but the prognosis was good the patient was Expected to Recover as i sit thinking about what it all means and who understood but in the end who knows if what is good is good and if to recover after recovering one needs to recover from recovery as in giving up one slavery for another we just change the names to protect the innocent and that is descent or indecent or just another descent of misguided intent but the patient is expected to recover to rediscover to uncover to discover to become your own lover People are still living lives wasted and blighted we should not be proud of ourselves in this The aim must be to change within a lifetime what are we going to do next. Low aspirations didn’t want anything more to do with changed tack and started asking questions all staying on and wanted to go felt like grabbing and saying ‘Don’t you believe it.’ won’t have a lifetime of security nothing that cannot be possible tosca of hopeless love and i sink my teeth asking why why do you repay me with this exotic landscape of the imagination romance of mirages visions slipping our from the harmony rights of spring born from and within lean something passionately becoming identified power of self renewal keep contact with self life must fit the drama don’t miss a word appeal right to the heart nothing that cannot be possible haunting the halls of the mind not who i though they where how did i get here while dancing through life through time dreams of what will be and never be as i watch on from above and beyond while time marches on into the land beyond beyond i wonder about this and that and what goes on as thoughts like dreams and what seems haunts the halls of my mind as i, the child in the night screams at the nightmare of being chained to chain gang of what now seems like a bad dream and begs the question while haunting the halls of my mind – what about dreams? DENIED CARE BECAME THE EXCUSE leaving out substitute excuse we do not want to point this out objective thinking as indicated never been biased lets not mention reality trail of foot prints in the mind encrypted cracking the code of secrecy memo likely hood cutting care sounds impossible living on burried time i/you/we never existed have it under control cured unhooked outside of world but it was false piece of data take what learned any idea is an accident slanted against telling story story telling not that way this way acknowledge deceiving likely to end but doesn’t life unraveled demanded to be banging head against wall refused to be to be or not to be now suspect evidence shaping change opinion room for negotiation telling what to see and say going to far to my knowledge concur evolving right of passage need to adjust behavior unacceptable grossly distorted charge devastating conspiring to cheat self conspiring to appear not ultimately short cut getting to the bottom isn’t easy more to it than that sealed up accidental left open not valid bad faith bogus unfairly portrayed learn something astounding no idea blocked efforts to question life is a forgery never learning when to admit the inadmissible trying to identify suggesting what might not be the case own biased didn’t care ugly snapshot turned life into shambles no right to destroy life facing lawsuits investigating built on trust doesn’t prove a thing seeing is believing not exactly open how to prove it jealous don’t know how people think change wired heart ache contained living a lie caught at it i am not who i am pedantic megalomaniac piece of mind revolting tried to persuade to leave stay out of my life is the message try harder pejorative terms apologies for the inconvenience no history introduced in passing unobtainable torn up nothing more precious get them or not get them clock ticking different you never know faced with the unexpected working guilt any clue something from behind a little over zealous in the hot seat don’t really believe easier way more to discover wasted don’t know how got here doesn’t seem real depraved indifference what good does it to know in depth details happens when it happens caused to think about already happening celebration for human kind pale beside what can do not knowing what else is in there what makes a human being pivotal moments sense of finality personal example genetic predisposition the code isolated testing humanity what’s the end result determine predisposition less fatal understanding the knowledge increase probability constellations of variants change behaviors detention can save lives condition at risk for most of time don’t do anyway on down the list down stream wont recognize self on the brink substance of ourselves create repair maintain ultimate in the future distinguish mistakenly believe trying to find new humanity get life back make a difference just when you think trade in intersects impacts close last century important effect of the future is time and timeless variations on a theme how we look at the universe impact of time lasting impact way world looks and man looks at himself start last episode in our hands trying to figure what it means fulfillment of development amplify life understand code soon to reach the point of no return a concept a moment in the minds arbitrary finished line arbitrary sense of completion what is life saying to us not likely eludes analysis what does it mean impact on function meaning opens up areas change script for life look at ourselves and ask what are we going to do conceptual achievement race with self achieving this doesn’t achieve anything not a real achievement what we believe new process of discovery concept that where born leads to enormous impact race to the starting line hoopla looking at map of significance reluctance and question of the future skeptical phenomenal scale deciphered chosen no surprise race to search race to lay claim to understanding sequence long way from completion approach is different manageable causing dips over presented with challenging problem of putting it together in the end in the end result is the end watching the future is that worth something wrong metaphor the race of racial bias too shared vulnerable the running of the race automated humanity subway to nowhere strategy do things different accurate enough knitting together the pieces overlapping assembling random pieces redundancies didn’t seem likely locked into position generated frustration measuring things in all kinds of ways implications that you know it does it ain’t necessarily so consortium stimulus work hard ground work to get to this point questions to ponder more we know have no control ought not breach consequences privacy concerns high enough up genetic privacy genetic intelligence passing a bill against self no idea what so ever errant guiding body and protector abuse informed consent protecting privacy intrigue us all puny creatures about the business of understanding self profound or profane not fear knowledge but how we use the knowledge wrestling with self not where we should go variation is the genetic code of all of us rejecting difference subject to positive and negative uses shutting down human nature solving the unsolvable eliminate abuse hope will not get you for whatever reason with out moral constraint the argument for and against hollow debate between self can’t define life inseparable from environment extrapolate extreme rare exceptions find out hints nebulous issue are we going to continue viewing ourselves as hapless victims not the whole answer to everything breaking it down time worn uncanny difference is different reassuring interact respond to environment have to draw conclusion nature and nurture respond differently ways of responding results in different effect having said that will respond differently as we find out about difference between people make us who we are interacting combinations not to lose sight of what we value and dis value how to weigh the future the possibilities of changing all of us profound questions who we are and who we are made of just the beginning gave us time unknown to you and me here know evil see know evil building a prison of the mind how can we be sensible lighten the darkness of the soul have done you wrong reasons for way treated undermines the foundations of the soul what to do with self lets not fight one another lying way out of the present so want to be loved vanity to be loved after life what difference can it make want to be a god or goddess plunged into time again fell to one by one never suspected when one dies so much dies with one and what is written after is papers of lies have a long reach infected with repulsiveness a fool after all had no choice hardest thing had to do what kind of world are we living in vanishing where will it end all can say sways and bends with the wind that below at least still here why can’t imagine sinking fast secrets die suffering the torments of hell what’s going to happen when you go there do what you love follow your passion know much and more besides set up on a course of nothing less what then becomes things seen and heard cost of life and if need be course follow why wasn’t i told secrets of and from what to do is it true comings and goings live like a vessel whose child are you living in a fools paradise what is that to me/you may i know the reason in envy they criticize look like a greek tragedy pretend to be hard to be vindictive black spider that sits on the shoulder poisoning the ear inherit the kingdom what are we to do no one to turn too set up on a course of nothing less what then becomes things seen and heard cost of life and if need be course follow why wasn’t i told secrets of and from what to do is it true comings and goings live like a vessel whose child are you living in a fools paradise what is that to me/you may i know the reason in envy they criticize look like a greek tragedy pretend to be hard to be vindictive black spider that sits on the shoulder poisoning the ear inherit the kingdom what are we to do no one to turn too hide nothing the less said the better unbelievable tell the world that the world is at the door of a new age undergoing a metamorphosis like a birth giving birth to oneself like a mother giving birth to themselves astonishing event become a god posterity envies madness can’t last playing up to us living in the past created in image riding the sun bursting in the veins and a new universe is born absurd side setting the standard for sanity mortal disguise physical body found illusions reflected in the mirror of dis-illusions absolute absurdity absurd absolutely absolution inconclusive conclusion the other side the divide between absurd deserved and undeserved absolutely absurd a word unheard on the wings of a flightless ghost of a bird busy trying to answer the impossible suffering in silence reaching back into a painful past past the impossible and beyond into a go-through-the-motions merry-go-round Understand what you can and can’t do revolving door giving voice embarrassed to moan ironies about being about being impossible satisfied person is a generous person a generous person is not necessarily satisfied ability to pursue what makes you feel good quickest way to extinguish the flame feelings of failure and casting doubt trying to answer the impossible direct your attention, without resentment, how you can satisfy yourself specific things that could enhance your pleasure and then turn theory to action. an invisible line between what’s talked about and what’s done Nothing more and nothing less because in the end it’s essentially unknowable a dissection help shed some light. memoir tracks more than encounters with the exception remarkable remote downright peculiar was formed by complexities of this that and absorbing influences in ways that requires life raise to consciousness brought into the problems of life half-hearted attempt disturbed by this turn of events comically misguided or merely inept depicts the uselessness one weeping eye resolutely uncommunicative silence sober, clear-eyed gaze, most memorably approach resembles becoming and unbecoming unraveled and unraveling in a state of benign neglect seemingly worrisome assessment of pathology. moved to frequent tears by plight rejected and abandoned pretended it was a revelation casts around different kind of being revealed judgment examine life sustained construction of a coherent self clear and sometimes unpleasant light of reality contrarian views avoid obscurantist prose guilelessly understated direct and colloquial style whatever that means ditch the formal conventions trade anecdotes and metaphors before its to late to be before Weaving self into the fabric theorizing about the unconscious feelings conscious life dependent collapse. Most astonishing inextinguishable presence a dream of a surrogate home inside give up on killing innocence and trying to please parents flawed heroes existential despair steers away from the past and toward a vision of the future after delirium find my/yourself in the impenetrable uncertainty Promises in the Sky Promises, Promises and why vowed to restore confidence Getting There: A Reality Check interior decorating is mediocre at best. forgiven for being confused on expect to get more than just being dependent for everything even air to breathe do not distinguish self number has risen sharply in the last few years far faster than economic growth or population growth and furthermore why will grow further in years to come become more common almost as ordinary sometimes late but almost always And as the system grows, size helps collectively why more valuable as a whole, because more people can connect to it ? Still, the perception is the issue instrument of promises of why the promises of the sky has been to some somewhat somehow somewhere why waiting for why there is why and why why Promises, Promises in the Sky Beyond belief not yet been identified. speaking of horror and pain. It is too horrific for to even contemplate, to even think that anybody could even do a thing like that. It is just beyond belief. really shocked and traumatized after hearing the news on diagnosed and treated for did not know if this tragic news would affect condition. Difficult to accept the unacceptable not decided if and to paid tribute was such a gentle person poor York i didn’t know him well there was not enough of to go around and around revolving door merry-go-round or un-merry-go-round not enough to go around planning to come back to go forward and go back out and shout about definitely have become what one becomes really enjoying got a bit homesick for myself but could because was beyond belief what a relief prayers were said expected to visit died in the blaze of fame words distrust envy guilt nausea disgusted, distracted, disturbed, dizzy, beyond belief ramble on ambiguously – there’s a real simple life too long self-deprecatory way. talk away from the distractions and tensions Behind awaits needs a tuneup. excess. works for me way down dirt roads. easier for me if I don’t have to think about what I’m saying i say rolling countryside, butterflies and everything in between Thoughts pour out in a rat-a-tat stream of words. in a dream sounds echoes of ghosts scream On the eve of eternity typically yearns for simpler days i try to learn gravelly voice don’t want to go! I want to stay here Manic melancholy pushing to finish overruled bluer than blue truer than true who knew a little more melancholy please. talking inside trees leaves dance in the breeze got a sadness a madness from the quiet times searching lines upon lines with dissonant crescendos from odd assemblage life being a preparation for death. till the last gasp the last breath you dig your ditch and then lie down in it at the end not morbid looking forward not backward those nerves of life are still there. I’m thinking, ‘Hold on. It hasn’t happened yet. Right now, it’s still this massive obligation we all have to meet lying down in the ditch together waiting for what for a return to or of a lost metaphor perhaps we will live for ever – not sure life to so many is such a bore hand on my shoulder and You’ll be fine. backbone. look up for inspiration Ah, ‘the simple life’ come out of the woodwork and blow the lids off. there’s a real simple life hopes will promote unknown hope then there dumb luck trying to reproduce what happened naturally watered-down imitations of a feeling that can’t be manufactured simple life available trappings of sophistication musicians, artists and authors When I think of how I came to be I doubt doubt I would even be visions of paradise the soul of the heart watches with eagle eyes from the very start slave and not slave to the body to the mind to our personality built into tight little black box like sheep in a flock we mock lifes timeless clock tic toc tic toc where do we come from? what are we? who are we? where are we going? visions of paradise where eyes and lips cannot lie where dreams fly where truth like a fire in the blood speaks forth a volcano from the soul of the heart with words that have no words to speak speechless prepare to swallow the warmth of the sun to shine to be at one love – and you will find paradise move out of gilded palace stimulated from article to urging the queen to move out of her gilded palace move out of gilded palace reflections in the mirror thoughts about what reside inside illusions of gilded palaces in the mind as time flies dreams of lies and thoughts like a run a way horse free in the breeze jumping over the moon and laughing with the trees i say standing tall i will not move out of my gilded palace of dreams once and for all who am i today sitting on the edge of my mind and my bed and myself and the universe looking in the mirror of my mirror i ask holding my head in my hands “who am i today” am i this or that or somebody i have no idea i will be and who is me who am i today i ask myself in a half hearted way yesterday i took the day off from being what and who and trying not to be influence by the you of you and the metaphoric mythical you and spent the day as me in me trying to see and to be but today is a new day and do i play you or me who am i today as i sit on the edge of myself wonder if if i will be a commodity on the shelf or just me myself who are you today took me out of myself trying to figure where i want to be while dancing with mirages and shadows and echoes of dreams that fly by and make me sigh to catch beyond why as i watch the parade of thoughts and wondering if i am too shy to look my self in the eye and try to take myself out of the why of why espeljo de maravilla – mirror of marvels between heaven and earth above and below are dreams that scream to be heard not deferred to see one self in the mirror of who we be to find the soul of the heart in between the spaces of life as an art to live in and be a mirror of who we be to see our selves in the espeljo de maravilla is the way to the lost paradise to be free threatened by life – life is but a dream off in a world of dreams life is not what it seems row row row your boat gently down the stream merrily merrily merrily merrily life is but a dream as they pound on the door of my mind voices shouting wake up wake up life is not a dream but but i say aloud to myself if life is not a dream then who am i and who are you and what are we to do if this is not a dream what is true and what do we know and knew i say to the voice that challenges my choice as i peek out my two windows at the lies that spies with my eyes and sees that life ain’t what it seems to be and this to me is a dream or nightmare depending on if you hear your or somebodies silent scream children skipping in the distant dream singing over and over row row row your boat gently down the stream merrily merrily merrily merrily life is but a dream not life threatening threatening the mind threatening the body each in its own private war of denial mind wants to believe that the body is not part and the body off on its own believes it is made of iron from the start denying denial the mind and body at war with itself an allergic reaction to thinking and feeling split in two the alcoholic in a dance with oblivion searches the separation of state of mind state of body both opponents in opposition fighting fire with fire the mind denys the body the body denys the mind and both go about un-unified and definably undefiled and deniably undenied at war to the end of the end the mind in a tug of war with the body to be king of the hill fighting the never ending war still the body fights with its limitation the mind fights with its exaltations and incantations and aberrations that it is beyond the beyond and only comes together when one or the other is threatened by life Whatever Happened to me and Little Red Riding Hood Whatever Happened to me the me of me and who what where when and why do parts of us grow up and die or just live a lie now dancing on the edge of time and the universe i dream of someday playing again with little red riding hood and the seven dwarfs and bambi and simba the lion and little bo peep and the jungle boy.. and row row row your boat . into a dream in my heart of hearts… if i could only be a lion or a tree how happy i would be even a giraffe or even a flee as long as i could be just me if i could only be even a captain of a toy boat or something that does bobs up and down and does float or even a silly old billy goat as long as i could be me i wouldn’t have to hide inside an old coat if i could only be as tall as tall could be i would look far and wide and nothing and nobody not even me could hide as long as i could be me inside if i could only be bird on high i would just fly beyond why and the lie of the lie as long as i could be me i wouldn’t tell another lie if i could only be wise as the owl in a tree i could see into you into me and then i would laugh and dance and just be if i could only be just me wouldn’t that be wonderful sight to see ——————– Subject: POEM Time will tell when Date: Wed, 28 Jun 2000 19:15:46 -0400 From: geo Organization: http://randomplace.com To: geo@randomplace.com, Ann Tares you can see the article that this came from here http://www.cnn.com/2000/TECH/computing/06/28/super.http.idg/index.html Time will tell when very easy to use, very easy to understand but very powerful Two completely unrelated underneath, which saves us a lot of time Time will tell looks promising, it’s too early to say how big of an impact it will have It will take awhile to know if the mature comes out of will have a lot of support start with Rose’s but could change significantly before it becomes looks like a good approach to some real needs but it is very early in the process would be a boon to Invisible Worlds affiliate with Invisible Worlds essentially a tool kit can use to quickly create invisible worlds a range of instant invisible solutions, meta exchange. peer-to-peer a good foundation for creating govern invisible sharing Implementations will be much faster and much more reliable can use the basic framework of Invisible Worlds cheaper in the long run stacked on top of the reusable worlds without changing the underlying foundation. impressive connection between two worlds that are invisible which can alternate between functioning as can respond to requests in leaps and bounds faster than a speeding bullet as well as push back and forth over connection. connection i think i have an invisible One special feature is it can carry multiple simultaneous invisibly exchanges between invisible people is easy and transparent and can come in any transparent color or for that matter be in any invisible form including and runs on top of and acts as an alternative too and your choice of custom-made and is ideal for all sorts of invisible needs like However, doesn’t work well nor does it support simultaneous exchanges but what the hell have to create own special-purpose invisible world in order to support the insupportable hope to speed that process. Beefed-up Think of invisibleness as being on steroids, the relations both physical and spiritual in Invisible Worlds. People are trying to jam all kinds of things up and into Invisible Worlds. and it has become overextended. and invisibleness is becoming endangered of becoming endangered won’t replace nothing can replace invisibleness and invisible worlds knows that everything, can be used creating a meta exchange and needed a baseline Instead of creating built as a general-purpose foundation upon which we could stack the future of the future to demonstrate flexibility. Invisible Worlds runs and is working as expected attended by more than 200 people the next step in the path is for the world to become invisibly invisible and not take up so much space hold meeting in invisible places people really, really excited about things and get right Meanwhile, Invisible unveil the veil and hopes to turn it over to the community as invisibleness gains momentum. also sponsoring the development that will integrate Invisible Worlds to become even more invisible but not sure it can handling the effort the odds are good will be bundled in the next fall. Invisible Worlds will launch its first invisibleness bases need to raise $12 million in venture capital financing. —————————- anity is as vanity does – humor is something as valuable as an Aqua-Lung – Vanity is as vanity does Life as a Convict prison term for being infirm aggression, bull session, concession, confession, depression, digression, expression of obsession, regression, repression, transgression confession in possession, of oppression, released sinking deeper into a depression could be released from the indiscretion, time after time and time off for good behavior said in a series of interviews ready to rejoin society. Vanity is unfair vanity is insanity over the course gravitational force appearance and suspicion a disposition of a prisoner of vanity angry the final visit before or after Depression just sinking further into obsession, just dead, living in a warehouse in the mind ready to get out.” judge who found vanity the actor had violated humanity probation being possessed by inhumanity repeatedly missing attitude over and under incarceration ranges from sanguine to bitter sharing a cell zoo inmates the prison kitchen . serving up time line upon line keeping to self interact cell mates sharing his food and stories Christmas carols. favorite thing to do in life was to be laughing until the tears welled up, found that humor is something as valuable as an Aqua-Lung is to divers denies being evaded questions on whether changing the subject twice and finally responding: I can neither confirm it or deny while behind bars I would never tell you the worst things that have happened last appeared alongside Wonder Boys denies getting involved scuffles. Vanity is as vanity does rehabilitation classes tested all the time, keeps from backsliding into former self addiction swan song End of story what do i think i think mind reeling from dealing with mirages that lie between the spaces of my body mind and soul as time races my mind travels all over the places wondering if what i believe to be is not some misguided impression that i needed to flee to be free i admit i did dance with an imaginary reflection as if in a trance and come to terms with myself in some strange bizarre mating dance images reeling and flying of dreams of what was and might be i am still trying to find my me to just be from heaven and hell now faced with a cold hearted spell and dying and wasting in the minds cold prison cell waiting for words that utter the final farewell the death nell from nel of my hell like a proud peacock i strutted around in my mind showing my face that is not my face trying to comfort my innocence lost and find my soul my inside place my paradise lost and for what and at what cost what is this life about echoes a silent shout to live to die, to penetrate beyond why why do we live a lie i ask my why oh why and then again i wonder if i had wings would and could i fly i ask myself maybe its just that i am in a deep slumber as i say to my heart and to what’s left of my wonder wake up what is this, did you not know from the start and the response from the soul of my heart i was trying to catch a falling star as i dance holding onto the sky from an imaginary swinging bar and from a far i look. i see me and my small little vain ego, an undiscovered superstar and asks if i/you are just a commodity on the shelf what is life? what is real wealth? where do we come from? where are we? where are we going? or maybe i was tricked by my own trick believing i was slick charmed by my own charm trapped in my own imaginary funny farm thinking i was invincible from self harm like a lost dear that came too near i was too fearless to fear and should have had my ear to the ground to hear what maybe was so near that i couldn’t bare to admit it to be clear for fear of fear now looking at the flower after the bloom of a soul that has been seduced by a charming witch on a broom and i the fool proudly wear the costume of a buffoon a baboon and playing my part as an extra in some sad tragic play that was doomed from the start and the flower that once did bloom so wondrously wonderful so full of light with colors of subtle perfume composing unheard harmonies entwined in tune lost symphonies that exploded like the rites of spring once a flower in full bloom we danced in the sunlit warmth of my loves womb and made paradise lost come to life as we did consume our own lovers perfume did we dare did we dare… we did presume to assume to bath in mysteries spice to love to have found paradise and melting as one into one and now i wonder what advice should i give to those who enter the vise think once, think twice, think thrice… unless you are made of ice don’t be afraid of life, take a slice trust your intuition pay attention don’t hold back don’t think to much, don’t expect, be patient, suspend your mind, don’t be a spectator, and don’t get a head of your self… its the little things that make the difference, don’t be perfect or expect the other to be a mind reader, be true to you, listen, put yourself in the others place there is more to life than being perfect and having a heart cold as ice and remember to love is to find paradise… but don’t take my advice find out for your self inside i am inside this facade this masquerade this palace i guard inside lives a story book prince a little boy looking out at the world as some strange little toy and wishing that it was ok to just jump for joy locked up in the ivory tower trapped in a body that seeks control or power and not just happy to be a wonderful flower looking out through eyes that don’t show it but have tears and dream that shout and cries for having to live out the lie of lies inside i am a little boy looking out at the world as some strange little toy and wishing that it was ok to just jump for joy or stand on the street corner and say ahoy and swim across the page and dance and engage inside i am on the outside i am who i am not jumping from one place to another trying not to get shot for being just a little different than the rest of the lot but inside i am a boy looking out at the world as some strange little toy and wishing that it was ok to just jump for joy what do i think i think mind reeling from dealing with mirages that lie between the spaces of my body mind and soul as time races my mind travels all over the places wondering if what i believe to be is not some misguided impression that i needed to flee to be free i admit i did dance with an imaginary reflection as if in a trance and come to terms with myself in some strange bizarre mating dance images reeling and flying of dreams of what was and might be i am still trying to find my me to just be from heaven and hell now faced with a cold hearted spell and dying and wasting in the minds cold prison cell waiting for words that utter the final farewell the death nell from nel of my hell like a proud peacock i strutted around in my mind showing my face that is not my face trying to comfort my innocence lost and find my soul my inside place my paradise lost and for what and at what cost what is this life about echoes a silent shout to live to die, to penetrate beyond why why do we live a lie i ask my why oh why and then again i wonder if i had wings would and could i fly i ask myself maybe its just that i am in a deep slumber as i say to my heart and to what’s left of my wonder wake up what is this, did you not know from the start and the response from the soul of my heart i was trying to catch a falling star as i dance holding onto the sky from an imaginary swinging bar i/you we are an undiscovered superstar and from a far i look. i see me and my small little vain ego, vanity, and a little voice from inside and a far asks if i/you are just a commodity on the shelf what is life? what is real wealth? where do we come from? where are we? where are we going? maybe i was tricked by my own trick believing i was slick charmed by my own charm trapped in my own imaginary funny farm thinking i was invincible from self harm like a lost dear that came too near i believed i was too fearless to fear and should have had my ear to the ground to hear what maybe it was so near that i couldn’t bare to admit it to be clear to recognize the answer for my fear for fear of fear now looking at the flower after the bloom of a soul that has been seduced by a charming witch on a broom and i the fool proudly wear the costume of a buffoon a baboon and playing my part as an extra in some sad tragic play that was doomed from the start and the flower that once did bloom so wondrously wonderful so full of light with colors of subtle perfume composing unheard harmonies entwined in tune lost symphonies that exploded like the rites of spring once a flower in full bloom we danced in the sunlit warmth of my loves womb and made paradise lost come to life as we did consume our own subtle lovers perfume did we dare did we dare… we did presume to assume to bath in mysteries spice to love to have found paradise and melting as one into one and now i wonder what advice should i give to those who enter the vise think once, think twice, think thrice… unless you are made of ice don’t be afraid of life, take a slice trust your intuition pay attention don’t hold back don’t think to much, don’t expect, be patient, suspend your mind, don’t be a spectator, and don’t get a head of your self… its the little things that make the difference, don’t be perfect or expect the other to be a mind reader, be true to you, listen, put yourself in the others place and be you there is more to life than being perfect and having a heart cold as ice and remember to love is to find paradise… but don’t take my advice find out for your self don’t be a commodity on a shelf escaping the food chain in a near brush with reality that desperate mirage of the illusive totality of normality i escape past time the nonsense of this rhyme that seems to be above and beyond the call the line as again almost got lost in the ball and chain the trap of able, eve and cain this time it was close so close i almost taste the fire of the refrain that has made many a man insane and be self slain and the medal of honor i can again with disdain sadly claim for the illusive delusive love and its sirens fame almost did nearly claim me again to a life temporarily insane on a collision course was i with the seduction of lovableness of that which shall remain a name like a rose is still a rose by any other name its all the same despair to love to unfair to despair to love to unfair to despair the cycle that nobody can escape and nothing can compare and only time can repair in the past and past the past and on into oblivion some how its the same like warriors marching into the sirens flame where some claim the illusive loves paradise does reside remain and again not to be one to complain after every battle there remains memories of the stain like a fish who barely escapes the magnetic lure of the sirens bait we can’t escape our genes our fate like ulysses we have to taste the taste bait and to know that we have lived from the starting and finishing gate one must not lose sight that love and hate are mate to mate but in the end to some love is freedom and to others it a state that is at best left to those who are can remain and eat off the plate in the endless dance with the sirens between sane and insane i barely escaped the food chain yours truly i remain living in a state of suspended animation gazing out the window of my eyes and mind at the huge emptiness next door. supposed to be on the subject, but hopelessly stalled. tosses off pieces of the incidental prepares elaborate anecdote In one sense and on the other sense its all nonsense hero is still an adolescent in an old body yearning for an intense, transforming love in another outlived life waiting for death It’s unclear whether or not to be or not distinguish between the mirage and the mirage of reality dark power lives in the light of darkness idiosyncrasies scorn for identity disdain personal question volatile relationship soon-to-be- much more alluring. expatriate, adrift on own little island intensity provides ballast part of appeal of gravity of certainty uncertainly a flower placed before every thought tribute to the mirage a legend in my/your own eyes near sighted error sorry mistakenly identity thought i was you prefer to let it stand uncorrected terrified of being abandoned loneliness the greatest fear will care until the end. felt a warmth spreading through whole body rushed naked through snow into a sauna.” no matter how bizarre death/life/death/life/longing already an aesthetic cliche, immortalized in a poem or a pop song. self portrait of you and you-manity works both with and against and for cliches droll and disturbing do take care of each other Worst of all stop having a life sex/love love/sex never talk about why comically upended, disastrous results, unable to fantasize the discrepancies are terrifying and shameful, urges terrified As time goes on, innumerable a dizzying litany of life’s melodramas the elegant charmer charmers get charmed no longer makes stunned with worry wastes away difficult to please excruciating climax, the swirl of stone outside become the perfect emblem realities have spiraled tragically apart destinies have fused almost to a single point; drives ever deeper into the minds suspended desert literally crossing into the land of the dead and across the page of times and space life been riddled with secrets and lies. however, is not the revelation the revelation is how little the facts really matter collaborated in deception After all, it was subtle blend of shared illusions and private realities fantasies been exalting, mind ti mindlessness and lit with inquisitorial intensity — allowed to appear on figments of imagination. survives to reimagine the future compulsively repeats the story of the story of the story harrowing journey as if hoping for absolution tormented far less by lies own inability to save the liar no longer the brash and grandiose but a stranger in a strange mind/body/soul/country/humility/ in the face of death’s final betrayals on the old themes of mortality and forgiveness, called upon to answer the agonized yet unspoken question reverberating reimagine the future – We should all be so lucky. vulnerability of the imagination in a ghost-ridden land a flaw of morale and morality evoke the sense of vulnerability inhabiting historical fault line of dream time haunted by aboriginal ghosts in a walk about of the mind availing itself of massacre and repression of vulnerability of the imagination never sufficiently confident own identity of reconciliation to dislodge confidently indifferent not having sought freedom having lost it the imagination on the edge of the imaginary expansive of darkly violent images of estrangement Babylon Conversations goes beyond the stranger-in-a-strange-land theme beginning of wisdom a rumor In different ways launches upon the tidal wave of nightmare a tiny imaginary raft-borne floating free in the mind paddling if not prevailing. evoke the curse of history repression no reconciliation at all a breath-stopping account of a sadistic make pity collection, perhaps Remembering failures build into rage against the ancestral routes of the imaginary threatens and threatening blind and tragically senseless the vulnerability of the imagination to bring as a peace offering. truce is broken.of trust and trusting wandered free and unharmed the innocence of imagination wondering dead voice speaks beyond the grave victim hood makes wraithlike reconcilers: voices reaching in every direction lost the protection of innocence lost what little had of it lying quiet in the heart, slowly sinking into the ancientness of may be overpowered be aware of clever turns haunted unsettlement contrived. portrays alienated feelings of combat leave situation is journalistically provocative sketchy and flat. nostalgic sketch conversion wasteland used for imaginary adventures with More interesting is the title vulnerability of the imagination in a ghost-ridden land attempt to compress the memories and emotions of a warrior of the imagination expatriate of the soul distant memories returning for a visit suffers from forcing Too much signaled too little received missed moments in the landscape of and by contrast expansive range takes the form reunion of a the imaginary and the imagination discriminating shrewd judgment, vignettes weave through above beyond and into employs effectively power than subtlety a lovely grave complexity nonetheless presides over restless visit to the imagination sometimes a familiar museum frailty mementos aging weariness with the imaginary reality touches, though indirectly abiding theme how frailly the conquerors about to become ghosts themselves inhabited the imagination a ghost-ridden land where vulnerability of the imagination takes a last stand, what makes greatness from interview with henri cartier bresson the art takes me nothing worth knowing can be taught photographs composition camera way of drawing when subject takes you concentrate in the silence you mustn’t want don’t think the brain is a bit dangerous life in general all these are labels the relationship with reality is to be sensitive no idea never thought of it don’t know what young means you are alive or not an anarchist life that has lived anarchism is an ethics a way of being an act don’t consider self a camera just a human being society is crumbling to pieces and fast obituary will come in due time no rush time doesn’t count its all about time and space complete unity no rules depend no longer the same thing its a tool or another tool camera like a brush everything is interesting escape as a prisoner thinking of all those who haven’t been able to escape think of those who didn’t make it its far all that now know when to shoot give satisfaction to your eye had many fathers if i knew what i was doing i wouldn’t have done it work for the dialog to find the right word no complaints by way of acting i complain taking portraits without a camera camera between shirt and skin anarchist is about loving fulfilling a necessity with oneself living in a world collapsing you can’t go back keep on fighting had no answer then lucidity doesn’t come with words nourishment as an artist goes through the heart never a brain no mans land escape death question of presents past and future can’t say it out loud don’t think i am a photographer have a camera and some time a use photographer is quicker than drawing hands and feet are difficult beauty the sensuality who cares in the moment everything is a fraction of a second have to be present don’t exaggerate fighting windmills in my mind i remember stumbling on places were cervantes wrote while living for 3 or 4 months in Seville memories painting and writing under the statue of cervantes and valesquez if i may be so bold… cervantes was a man of my spirit adventurer, dancer on the edge of lifes knife a wandering jew too i am told he fought the fight for creativity and was wounded in the battle of body and minds and might and for what he believed was wrong or right anyway we can agree he had some intriguing insight he rode through shadows of the night a warrior with sword in one hand and words in the other to shine light on our shadows in the cave of mindless might cervantes spent time in the prison of other peoples minds too but then who cared who knew he fought with and for metaphors probably slept with whores if i have my stories right and fought shadows and windmills day and night Don Quijote the dreamer fought the truth whether it was right depends on which side you fought or fight in any case it was full of delight mixed with insight i remember stumbling on a wall of a building on the outskirts of sevilla with a plaque saying cervantes wrote one of his stores here.. and sat out side the prison where he wrote Don Quijote he was a clever old coyote and me i sit here fighting windmills in my mind waiting for something some dream some light to take me from being so mindlessly blind hoping for Don Quijote or sancho panza to come across the page and whisper a little pieces of wisdom from their age when there were real warriors who fought with passion, rage and the wisdom of the unknown sage and maybe someday i will have the courage to come across the page man of his time and place i sit here thinking if i am the man i am and a man of his times hmmm and i wonder who is this his i am and then again i also wonder who and what it means to be a man and a man of his times and place lots of questions bouncing off the walls of my mind as i try and decipher the questionable questions and who i am and who you are and what are these times and places that have no signs along the roadway we measure time in assumable arbitrary markings that somebody decide would start here and there and me i am a man of no time and place that i can discern or maybe i am displaced in any case some would say i live in my own space sometimes lacking in grace but when i look in the mirror at my face i see your face in my face and well the case of man of his time and place i guess i am and am not in the race for time and place. i would like a little more grace a monument to failed romance i sit on top of the monument in my mind erected to some idol worship for lost illusions i sit on top of the mountain looking down at myself with out being too vain trying to find some sense in this senseless intense life game i have sometimes disdain again i admit i am a little vain as i look at the monuments of love like sisyphus i have climbed and created as if somewhere along the way i have been baited by life and its muses and found joy and abuses we are lucky but don’t know how to enjoy it echoes in my ears from the mouth of my aunt and i sit here dancing between mirages of failed romance and loves watching for signs of peace of white doves to come and warm the place in my heart which has not cupids arrow but looks like someone has been play darts with my/our hearts… as i examine the unimaginable heart that was innocent at the start and ask myself and love and ask what comes first the horse or the cart or the chicken or the egg as i beg my mind my soul my being to release me from the bondage this cage of passions and rage of mirages and barrages of magnetic impulses that often has led me astray and to gymnastic convulses and sad repulses i sit on top of the mountain the monument looking down at myself with out being too vain at all the pain and disdain and ask… what do we win? if we gain the thing we seek?? who buys a minute’s mirth… to wail a week ??… and sells eternity… to get a toy? a dream… a breath… a moment of fleeting joy ??… and for one sweet grape… who will the vine destroy ??… and wonder if maybe the monument i have created to failed romance is somebodies way of saying i am just a toy all i can say is i have tried my best to be a good ole boy and taste a little of lifes sweet joy allegory to an allegory definition – the representation of spiritual, moral, or other abstract meanings through the actions of fictional characters that serve as symbols. or figurative narrative, poem, or the like: to speak so as to imply something other and i lost in the otherness of metaphors speak so as to imply something other then other and yet what ever one or i say is till subject to allegory this to some maybe be a sorry excuse for glory or just another story but in any case i must confess if i either be a metaphor or and allegory for either or I yam what I yam! says popey the sailor man… beep beep the phenomenon at this point generates own kind of interest closer you look at it the more it evaporates the closer you look at it the more you see suddenly think you are in another place if you have not been living on this planet what’s the story straddling two worlds hunger for fantasy culture flat no there there enveloping invaded by life unpretentious know it but don’t know it gift of the vision appeared visual imagining in the mind is better following own nature endless string of cliches fashion the thing to do write in gold twilight of innocence see what’s in your own head hard act to follow everything removed diminishes in due time meeting again and all well images from the grave something unusual mistaken decision dense inexplicable element lost in the fog waiting uneasily horrified helplessly collision like a can opener long moment lost instantly trapped in the dark short story no chance of getting out almost immediately to see what had happened in the fog dressed to sleep non among them more tether corpses lost in macbreness tragedy seeps back in evading the future doing homage think deeply what an individual can do in the face of a life time may you rest in peace… lost lines never to leave our consciousness… a frozen moment in a dream of lost moments in a sea of glass days of wine and roses no more no less remember forever is lost in a land of what could be across the see of eternity the closer you look at it the more it evaporates tip toe into oblivion fading away as i watched you fading away from me into a distant mirage … i watched you tip toe into oblivion carrying your soul back into Socrates cave my heart was speechless and could not cry out… out out damn spot…as i watched you fade away not only from me but from yourself swallowed up in sirens dance of words that came forth as if spewed from a volcano … as i watched you, a stranger to me, perched high up on my lonely island in the mind in a paradise lost, i watch you disappear from me into a haze so dense as to engulf my sadness and the future and to never be seen or heard from again… i watched in amazement as my heart let go and return to its place to the unknowable that we all know… life beyond imagination ship wrecked lovers time is precious not that it matters beaten before started in a wonderland many a strange tale the dream of wonder in wonderland just can’t live with out every dreamed many a strange tale mustn’t waste time in fear time enough for tears struck to the hearts a war for the imagination fought on the battlefield to free ourselves from tyranny fight it with all that is in us be curious controlled by fear i listen to the voice behind the voice and watch the fear slowly eating away at the innocence of the little things that was you i listen to the voice behind the voice the tentative hesitating overly cautious over whelmed little girl voice as i watch you fight the fight in the battle grounds of your mind where many a war has been fought with fear and many lost to fear i listen to the voice behind the voice like a battle fatigued soldier afraid to make another mistake and makes the fatal of all mistakes the fear of making mistakes i listen to the voice behind the voice and watch the impossible come to life as fears that are in fear of fear where nothing existed before now an inescapable mirage of mine fields littered the landscapes of the mind with remnants of dead and dying corpses of dreams that were choked suffocated the life out of, out of fear of fear i listen to the voice behind the voice a tear runs down my heart as i look at the what was left of the battle field where fears versus love battled to the end to find what once was your childlike fearless love has now transformed into you into your/my worst fear a life with out love ————————————– and some words that put themselves together that have made up a fragment of a poem a life physical and spiritual alone less and keep going this way you are going to be alone not losing my mind not much longer for this world no coincidence found more than what remembers find what you are looking for? become the person want to be its funny how near death brings you closer to life scene from an Italian opera a bit puzzled why never to see myself again never to see my self in you again life is a fragments its what you do with it that counts Almost Wordless Song i listen to the almost soundless thoughts slowly creeping out of the core of my inner store where like a ghostless shadow in the night rides on the new moon of rising tides i listen very carefully as the highwayman rides and rides into the night as head less horsemen whisper whisper… i am you i am you i am you and i who am you whisper back i am you i am you i am you and together we ride beyond the beyond into the almost wordless night of imagination singing ever so softly as barely a sound escapes i am you i am you i am you i am you i am you i am you you are me you are me you are me don’t you see shapes what we know of reality What separates reality from artifice? “What in the world was that?” Whatever else it is, a window into a half-forgotten moment current obsession with mind bending tongue-in-cheek morality comes from somewhere beyond any imagination tour through several states of misery Fishtank hardly excuses the invasion of privacy the concept of privacy may be obsolete. episodic eccentricity pleasant inanity, you may say narrative collage dominated by abstraction, by an aesthetic of the image, disjointed, abstract narratives confers immortality alchemical capacity to confer renown disjointed, abstract narratives don’t want to be reached unreachable incendiary questions largely innate, or is heavily i influenced by learning and experience. yet to see if there are detectable s there some kind of underlying common mechanism that is ‘intelligence,’ or is intelligence a fractionable set of cognitive processes that differ according to different skills, domains, or talents. > unreognizable > > prejudiced beyond control > where is the problem > fate of world in your hands > don’t surrender > quite mind > waiting to make move > joined to escape > what have i done > what is going to happen > overwhelmed resistance > steeping into > grave misgivings > > prejudiced beyond control > where is the problem > fate of world in your hands > don’t surrender > quite mind > waiting to make move > joined to escape > what have i done > what is going to happen > overwhelmed resistance > steeping into > grave misgiving imaginary friends you where my i, i was your you and we were we – imaginary friends together we were free i could play and laugh and dance and jump through myself and be me and you could be whoever you want to be even queen of a tree to me you where my me imaginary friend who finally found the me inside me and i for you at least it seemed to be true how lucky we were to be we knew it was shared by very few to be free to be to be comfortable body mind and spirit were we to dance between the spaces to share the subtle joys the little romances the little chance to always be new for me to be you and you to be me and to find what is true something only imaginary friends would knew i was your you, your little prince you were my rose a flower of poetry and prose and everything else – who knows and we were flying on clouds on a butterfly wing and did we sing you could hear the universe laughed as we did our thing and now a sad tale i tell as i hear the ringing of the metaphoric bell a thief in the night stole your wings you use to fly high and you fell out of sight to the place of doubt and no delight from that imaginary place where everything is possible to the place where everything is doubtful and practical were material things exists as an illusion caught in time where dreams are tied to anchors so as not to fly past why where success and strange things are idolized and worshiped and the shadows in Socrates cave are still casting shadows and i a visitor to this strange lonely land walk around looking in the eyes of the hypnotized wondering how could we buy and where are the people who ask why as i look inside and out for my imaginary friend who is out of sight no longer to share my simple joys my little delight or insight sadly i dwell at the bottom of my own little hell of hell looking for remnants of a dream that once did seem to be a bright inner beam and now on a not so merry merry-go-round i sit in my aloneness nursing the hole in my whole my soul for my imaginary friend has disappeared into an imaginary black hole and i feel a little lost like a little lost soul utterly inconceivable theme marriage to some is a prison to throw something into to dance between the line to wonder at wonder and to find oneself at the beginning of time utterly inconceivable as time marches on and i in my way find it strange how we stray from come what may and what can one say about life and the inconceivable it’s unbelievable as we live on in some strange alarm bees who swarm its utterly inconceivable how what appears to be meaningful is often not what we had in mind and this is what i find utterly inconceivable consigned to oblivion my life an historical fiction a rumor nobody is who they appear to be but who are we who is anyone things never work out as planned the price we pay for camelot older and wiser and no nothing crimes of passion world is changing alone in the world ain’t no winners no losers don’t make know sense trying to fool me waiting for somebody to find out way of looking at things anything possible be somebody one day when you look back on your life it all about the moment the little moments make your life meaning full hear my heart occupies the mind long after one has finished begins to fade away, leaving us with what may be true not the particulars of life, but, in an odd circular way, could never elevate remembered, only not as an artist, but as a forger and bon vivant, charlatan, moral pygmies In the afterword, what was once only speculation about my life has become, as rumors often do, accepted as fact. What more fitting way could there be to end by questioning the very nature of the fiction of my life itself? contrivances in a world suspicious of its own nature spontaneousness is incontrivedly inconceivable inconceivably inconceivable as i sit between the space watching how distant we are from ourselves and the places of places. trying to control the uncontrollable self hypnotized by control which has a large hole and for what end do we wind up in a hole and what about the effects of contrivances on the soul slaves of beauty and martyrs of love. i sit here fighting with the mirror of my inner self dancing between mirages of what i thought was as i wondering down the path of memories trying to comprehend the incomprehensible and wondering if i was a martyr of love and a slave to beauty and what is it that sirens call and me with dreams of one day standing proud and tall and the where with all and wondering where did i fall or was it something i need to learn again and again that i am a slave to inner and outer beauty and a martyr of loves call abandoning my self and my senses for wild intense waiting to learn what i need to teach and not to preach but i beseech please!!… let me learn this lesson once and for all life is short i want to climb the unclimbable babble of a human wall and get on with it before the last and final call the phantom of happiness on the illusive trail to everywhere and no where in search of the unsearchable the tower that babble did build and i in my way did unbuild in the course of meandering through the maze called life giving a little this and that with a lot of strife i stumbled on the unstumbable the phantom of the phantom of happiness that haunted my soul and made me unholy and unhole and gave me a hole that nothing could make whole that the phantom of happiness is the freedom of the heart make your life an art prisoner to eternity – to live in the a wakefulness of life to enjoy kind thoughts and beautiful silences screams across the page straight to my soul, the soul the quiet child that loves love and beauty and needs to be whole as i in my not so quiet tormented soul live in a silence trying to wake up to be awakened within my spirit to be whole reaching reaching i eat the words off the page searching inside and out of my soul for little soulful honeysuckle dew drops of wisdom “real beauty lies in the spiritual accord which is called love that can exist between man and woman” and i question, doubt and wonder about and think of mac beth and out out damn spot of love and what is not as i read on and on civilization is vanity and all in it is vanity the conquest of distance and the victory over the skies is but false fruits which do not satisfy the spirit, nor nourish the heart , neither uplift the spirit and those structures and theory which man calls knowledge and art are naught except shackles and golden chains which man drags, and he rejoices with their glittering reflections and ringing sounds they are strong cages whose bars man commenced ages ago, unaware that he was building from the inside and that he would soon become his own prisoner to eternity and he goes on yes, vain are the deeds of man and vain are his purposes and all is vanity on the earth and among all vanities of life there is only one thing that the spirit loves and craves “it is an awakening of the spirit, it is an awakening of the inner spirit of the heart,…” “what is this universe and why am i different from those people who are looking at me and how do i know them and where did i meet them and why am i living among them? am i a stranger among them or are they a stranger to this earth built by life who entrusts me with its keys” “it’s an awakening within the spirit, he who knows it, is unable to reveal it in words: and he who knows it not, will never think upon the compelling and beautiful mysteries of existence” “i hope you will teach yourself love and not fear…” “my soul is my friend who consoles me in misery and distresses of life… he who does not find guidance within himself will perish desperately… life emerges from within and not from environs” as i continue on my discovery towards untangling the prison of eternity of vanity and reflect of past insanity and vanity and profanity and profundity i start again at the beginning knowing less than i knew before until i reach back before time when vanity and i was not our whore i wonder when we will learn what is unlearnable and awaken within and escape past present future prison we are in there is an inescapable sadness in life there is an inescapable sadness in life there is there is i can tell you young and old i know, i have been touched and i have seen and been told life is not only full of wonder and beauty as when we where young not a lullaby song that our mothers might have sung life is not always what we had in mind who knows what we may find but the sadness and great sadness is part of the whole part of growing, its not good not bad just part of life its an opportunity to find oneself how lucky we are and how we don’t know it to appreciate more of what little we have for the soul only grows into itself in the depth of its ability to experience both great joy and great sadness to know the highs of one, one must know the depth of the other and embrace both equally with innocent discovery most difficult is to embrace the great sadness in our hearts for everything seems dark and hopeless the darkness is so dark that it consumes the light and as the darkness looms like a ghost in a nightmare night we want to run and hide and ride like the wind ride ride faster faster to find a place to hide but if we are to grow we need to know the highest mountains and the deepest holes we need to accept that there is an inescapable sadness in life but sadly to say some will avoid embracing the great sadness out of out of fear of fear and betray themselves in the fray and abandoned themselves and for them there is no relief they are prisoner of the inescapable sadness of life I have left and never returned you may think by appearances that i have returned but you would be mistaken for i have gone on a journey beyond myself beyond the imagination experienced a place so unimaginable that i have no words to describe it you may think by all appearances that i have returned but you would be mistaken for the i that left is not the i that has returned do not mistaken me for somebody you thought you knew for i am somebody new I have left and never returned you may think by appearances that i have returned but you would be mistaken for i have gone on a journey beyond myself beyond the imagination experienced a place so unimaginable that i have no words to describe it you may think by all appearances that i have returned but you would be mistaken for the i that left is not the i that has returned do not mistaken me for somebody you thought you knew for i am somebody new walking into myself walking down hudson river from 26 to battery park and back in the quietness of my being i walked into myself over and over strange how as strangers i/we have become strangers to our own selves be true has been said by many and a good few and yet i have lived in the mirage and struggle of the little lie of my I and EYE and the big LIE for so long i almost forgot how to fly as i sit listening to the seagull and my mind fly i was deep in the discovery of the little and big why i realized i didn’t remember i was i i am quite pleased to say that today i walked into my self… bravo hooray i hear a little voice inside say on joy now joy is a wonderful feeling but it only seems to go so far alone to share and spread ones joy to watch it grow in its glow now that is the joy i want and want to know like a flower is beautiful not out of vanity but because of its inner glow a joy that it shares with the universe if i dare say so joy like a flower like love needs a loving place to grow coming home somewhere inside i am not sure exactly where the i of i does abide but in that place we run and hide from and to the great divide in this moment i find myself getting closer to where the real i of i does reside coming home to a warmed bed waiting for my body mind and spirit to return as i open the door to my i of i and enter into my own long awaited arms for an embrace only a mother can give i am coming home to my own child today i decided to be hungry how much i/we have forgotten that comes natural to me to you what is it i ask myself that is truly true so today while walking in my way, mind body and spirit i realized better relearn what i have taken for granted and first and most important i forgot how to be humnan and what it is like to be hungry… so today since i am on my new new way to prepare my way fare and welfare by not eating and waiting till i am hungry! and just enjoy my walk and the sea sky and air grateful – the ability to appreciate -the happy man knows when he has enough interesting how most of us are so consumed by our disappointment in life so shock resistant that we have lost our ability to appreciate the little things that we do have and make the things we have not over shadow the gifts of life that we have… we are a strange people we never have enough who nothing is good enough and those who live their life by material success and count their mark in gold are never satisfied with whatever they have – its never enough it is said the happy man knows when he has enough strange as my aunt sonia (who is still lost in the hospital by the way) wisdom rings true “we are so lucky but we don’t know how to enjoy it” as well as have the gratitude to appreciate what we have coming back to myself coming from where and who was i wavered at the edge of collapse coming from the dead and walking wounded from the fog of confusion from darkness of self delusion from the emptiness of civilization from the fashionable from the vanity of insanity from the place where mirages are made from the trap of the ego from the world from the place where time runs from the middle of nowhere from the desire that leaves one wanting from the place where nothing is ever good enough from everywhere that is nowhere i crawl on all fours as a wounded animal back to myself the inexplicable sadness of being in the shadows of our being there reside caverns that hold secrets of sadness our own private reserve of madness secrets that are better left untold and sometimes the sadness and those secrets i confide are the pieces of us that we hide inside in our deepest divide hide so deep that we never even collide to our own selves what it is this abyss for if we did this we would expose a piece of us that we miss a piece that was as dear as a tender kiss and in this sadness we hold as a little child who is shivering cold and it doesn’t matter who what where we are told we hold on to this inexplicable sadness of being as a protective fold the sadness of being is part of seeing and knowing and our hearts are feeling and beating though fleeting even though the sadness is deafening and defeating if it hasn’t killed us yet lest we forget many who are afflicted with life and joy have experience and know the depth of strife for to know the lowest of the lows and painful woes teaches us much in that life comes what may and so it goes if we did make up with ourselves and kiss in the shadows of our being there reside caverns that hold secrets of sadness our own private reserve of madness hide so deep in our abyss where the sun doesn’t shine and there is no bliss secrets that are better left untold inside of all of us a little child does reside who is shivering and cold as a slave our body minds and spirits we think have been sold to our minds it doesn’t matter what we are told we hold on hold on tight to the sadness as a light a protective fold and sometimes the sadness and those secrets make us fearful and bold but mostly they make us lonely, cold and very old so old so tired and old and if we did unfold if we did expose this piece of the abyss that we miss a piece that once was as dear as near to us as a tender kiss that was touched by the serpents hiss the thief that stole our bliss what if what if we did make up with ourselves and kiss to love to love is to fly higher than high to love is to dance between the imagination to go beyond the sky to love is to be swept along in lifes passion singing a nightingale song to love is to see love in everything every bee every tree even in me to love is to be set free yoke to a skeleton adaptation grab it build the future yoke to a skeleton for what’s been done tell it like it is honors life dying inside stop and think and wonder complete impossibility of knowing time meaning of time and enigma defy logic and gravity impossible process ripple in time what you can do what can you do dissolve trying to ask questions come to own conclusion shopping ideas let it be let it be chained and can’t let go defying logic, defying humanity, defying explanation defying the future defying the past defying gravity defying believing defying replying, defying undying defying crying defying dying defying flying defying lying, defying trying defying vying defying in a pig’s eye defying rallying cry defying sacrifice fly defying see eye to eye, turn a blind eye i don’t know why hazards of modern living disappearing symbols, endangered, on the edge of collapse, mass extinction, siphoning off the future, human misery, small minded, mediocrity, helpless , hopeless, isolation, intolerance, mental disease, abused and abusive, vacant look, worshipping money, in-you-manity, hardship, gloomy, grim, heartsick, helpless, incurable, insoluble, lost, resigned, tortured souls, homeless, tradition, war, poverty, hunger, delusions, illusions, impatient, diseases of body mind and soul, shallowness, vacant, walking wounded, damaged, obesity, lying, stealing, blamed, theft, cheating , corruption, paranoid, psychopathic, psychotic, schizophrenic,deranged,distracted, disturbed, foolish, selling our souls, stolen humanity, being a commodity, dishonest, ashamed, are some of the hazards of modern living that take us on a voyage into strange mediocrity and insanity lost by ugly thoughts shattered pride shell shock attacked by a fool close encounter with death and life good-bye to all that what it was like hard to let go of the dead peered over the edge visited by the dead haunted dreams victims and executioners soldier in a baptism of fire moral baptism war mad must be mad themselves to think war is not mad banished bilked pride trudged away from life died cried that sent innocence out into the night for those left behind groping through hell in tortured eyes fatigue and sheer agony over the top reaching the breaking point refusing to reenter worst nightmare with rage but powerless fading into obscurity in rebellion some times death is a welcome visitor what are we fighting for no end in sight winter of discontent coming down heavily taken by surprise when the moment came taking on a life of its own in the midst of chaos euphoria rained envy to point of pain barking the same songs over or not it can’t be over to lead out of chaos to freedom deteriorated to debating societies battalion of death take part in a gamble roll of the dice and lost tide too mighty a chance encounter living life joined at the hip to a common you-manity or a common in-you-manity more or less a common insanity how far how far we’ve fallen downdown deep into the abyss survived by going numb. homeless sheep asleep home home on the range where oh where is the lost sheep of little bo peep where oh where have they gone a faceless nursery rhyme Everybody comes here thinking they are going to getoutlike escape fromquicksand. you take your/my/our self where every you go hiding behind the mask of the faceless mentally of the oppressed youthinkyouthinkyouthinkyouthink youbelonghere homeless in own home youbelonghere and youthinkyou don’t deserve to getout, and this is how life is supposedtobe supposedtobe to be to be to be or not to be on the streets of being and not being of being and not being listen carefully for you might hear the mindnight rider of your mind ignored, compelled and propelled through the birth canal joined the army of the voiceless the faceless the worshipers of vanity before and after insanity the army og the facelessmarches on and on against the army of its own in-you-manity insanity insanity echoes the ghost of voices of the faceless a fading voice from afar from a far the voice within with out Come back Come back come back to me come back to the future before its toolate toolate stand tall stand straight attention eyes left eyes wrong eyes looking for the nightingales song lost innocence where we belong howdid this happen?sleep sleep the faceless sleep the flock of sheep in search of the mirage of little bo peep get identity get face get self-esteem back, get self-confidence get yourself together together voice whispering across the page wake up wake up before its too late and before entering oblivion backRaising awareness don’t die don’t die of homelessness in your own mind and body, forget regrets forget anger forget despair forget what was unfair to hell with hell don’t dwell If you think you have no friends who care, that’s the disorder the disorder of order is ordering disorder to be in order reality is not always real but at least you know what you think you think your getting when you joined the army of the faceless jaundiced eloquence. discover within themselves hidden reservoirs of sado-masochism, of urges to be humiliated and hurt, to descend, in other words, into luscious degradation. wanting to escape back into pure numb death gagging on own grief. jaundiced eloquence. a distant dream sitting on the top of a cloud while-ing away undercover of a shroud i think of far away thoughts of what ought and not all for naught listening care-fully to a distant thought beyond me and my what i appear to have caught and try and see into the dream that some would like and others would scream and me i stand their in mirror of my mind trying to find a glimpse far away of place and people that are kind who see are not blind its a distant dream to be who i am, and not what you think i seem out law renegade of the mind in the quiet of the mind history hasn’t been the same since reading of the unpublished get away someplace else didn’t know what to expect wandered listening to blunt phases line drawn in the sand banned mind liberating the word the mind floating across the tops of clouds in a cloudless sky burning up waking nightmares of being the lost battalion leaving no trails on the road of the shadows soul in a comma imaginary renegade forget your mind be free dripping the emptiness of sleeplessness in a different place break through offended defend no end struggling to be out of law the walls closing in no where to go wander lust sentenced in abstention don’t listen random factoids derangement of the senses open fire no consideration no consequences inconsequential transparent filling the mind with empty thoughts on trial exploding inside no perception frozen moment you can not understand yourself… me opening into the underground opening a maze amazing the minds dances a merry-go-round around and around back from the dead derangement of the little i did – did i know sitting in the darkness false space mirages empty spaces creeping past the past the mindlessness radiating life instant insanity air full of thoughts of heavy nothingness seems to be never ending challenge the law be out of law in motion – emotion leading the world inside outside of itself moving the universe ahead an extension of you me us where is your heart lying, lie-ing rebelling against self systematically cutoff playing the game but what is it about preserve disorder find order in disorder a logical conclusion inconclusive drama didn’t have to follow know knock knocking on heavens door lets see who we are watch the shadow we cast putting the back to the front baptizing the universe into the mind feel what you feel be what you want to be existence is brief poignant like a dream that is almost finished broken heart of the heartless what do we have in common movement in to – move are you afraid of hell welcome to hell already died and became the road part of the past an unmarked grave comes from the heart tenderness pure in my heart for your own dream be in love with your life find own form bottomless unspeakable visions much more than there was concerned with sadness and joy what are we doing why are we preparing what difference does it make pay no attention weeping inside in a dark womb don’t hide face in shame want essence betraying the inner most just bones its eternity all the times the moment abort freedom abort slavery abort repression whereas and where fore an enigma the alibi thought would be terrified why not pointing a finger at an illusion will come again finding antecedents as the sun is on the edge am i beautiful to you time to make the move make your own universe stop being mute speak beyond silence stop being a burden be burdened by you flight to wonderous heights what ever happened to you to me standing in the naturalness be a renegade from the avoidance of life dreams dispersing beneath the sky learn to fly without question there are no answers just about out of time transform lives obligation not to pursue course unjust see and be seen even the unsean maybe we came out of the see looking out at the endlessness floating in the water before we are born riding out the nonsense freedom from routine celebrate life breathe crying out for imagination at least in part a reality at least in part brings out the bad side state of war balance of power lost illusion hate what we become hardened by self protection abandon pretentious toyed with surprised myself window into the mind set the world looks different fear a day when nothing happened flammable environment poem tattooed on the back the world is what makes me what i am if i could be the person i was meant to be prison of decay of the mind locking the mind up discredited crying out for imagination prisoners of war consensual waving a magic wand break momentum re-imagine experience room for creativity trapped in a mindset re-imagining the future legendary voice a secret life damaged done victim of times reaching an end point a point where it stops in recovery in verbal combat treated like children catharsis trying to heal a wound that is not there. been waiting for a new approach for a long, long time trying to find some reason for this rhyme as i look inside the slide i did ride into a hell hole deep and wide a hole between me and my soul and being whole trying to heal a wound that is not there that i hid must have eaten from the apple that i was forbid for no longer am i the little kid who dreamed and jumped up and down through myself and did things i once did now preoccupied with trying to heal a wound that is not there and if i dare not despair it is even more profound than what is here i fear with an intense stare as i try and listen carefully for signs of where and how to prepare and care and oh where oh where did my little dog (self) go a little child’s fairy tale rhyme for what reasons i do not know and where oh where the wound that is not there did go i search head to toe for a part of me that once did have a childlike glow i think so life is sometimes a rhyme like a yo yo and really what do i know it was so long ago when life was innocent and slow and we believed in… oh you know hello hello any body home.. hello hellllooooo time to go anyway life goes on and on with the show unraveling humanity weaving in and out as i sit here spinning and unraveling myself in a ball and chain trying to unravel who i/we/you are and me… oh me oh my i wonder why if there is some rhyme or reason or is it just self denial and treason or maybe its just silly season could be the reason but anyway treason or a legion of unreasonable reason its me and you and you-manity that has me unraveling in my near insanity for we are in some sort of calamity of inhumanity, anonymity and animosity and curiosity atrocity, and our own monstrosity, while graveling in my own unraveling seems to me our his/her-story is more gory than glory i have managed to unravel the mystery of the mystery theoretically speaking, we could obliterate the entire human races diversity by our own inhumanity and vanity that in the end breeds more mass insanity from the dawn from the beginning of the beginning the dawn and predawn and redrawn line in the sands of time searching for what is and what is not and for lifes rhyme from the solar system of our body mind and souls dating back to when everything was whole before after was after and before was before to the time there was no hole in the whole stardust grains in your eyes tries to block out the whys but eventually then come the lies of time out of time in search of another fine line to the rhyme to prove vanity is, oh so fine from the dawn of mankind – a self indulgent time we still try and define the world in our own image our own design the twilight zone seems to be my home strange how i often find my self quiet and alone dodge ball of life looking down from the kitchen window on the playground from the 20 th floor i watch a kid who was me in another life time pick himself up off the asphalt floor playing dodge ball i remember it like yesterday – every spring and fall strange how i recall who i was, when i was small… actually i was tall not knowing i would grow up still dodging life’s ball but as i reflect being the me of then i remember being 12 or 13 or was it seven or eight maybe 10 and playing a game of pickup dodge ball or games against the tennis court wall and then there was the game of one against them all… a kind of open free fall free for all and the idea for those who don’t know dodge ball is if you catch the soccer or basketball the other is out if the ball hits you your out is the call and so for some strange reason… not that i ever was competitive or cared who won it wasn’t violent to me but in how you played and enjoyed it all, it was great fun win, lose i was a kid who just loved to run and so while looking down on the playground i imagining myself as i saw another kid take a fall and there i was again maybe five feet something tall in the midst of the wonder of it all and remembering how for some strange reason i was confident and would stand proud and fearlessly tall i imagined i moved like a dancer a gladiator confronting the danger and possible pain of the ball hitting you in the face or any place but the pain was not something for some reason i wasn’t that afraid of – it was no pain no gain before i even knew the words i guess you might think i was not sane it was about being quick of hand and mind and a dance like no other game and that was also my little piece of fame some kids knew my name but for me it was like i was slowing down time and the fear and the mind and paying attention to how the other gladiator was going to throw or move i imagined myself being like a goat jumping here or there without fear i was young and had dark brown hair and could play all day when the weather was fair and in the summer sun i remember i had a little blond hair and then dodge ball came and went and i remember when i was 7 or 8 all i knew was to go to school, play ball and skate and eat dinner at eight who knew of vanity or cared about hate i was young and life was simple and great smile will live forever in my eyes. in an article on hearing about the death of Tito Puente long-time friend and fellow composer and musician Joe Cuba said “He was flowing, it was like a whole different world, he came out of nowhere,” Cuba said. “It was like ‘Wow’ exciting, and then his arrangements were amazing, and his playing. “His smile. Tito’s smile will live forever in my eyes.” and i saw what more can you say as i wonder what i or somebody would say about me but that is another story i sat next to tito puente at birdland 70 birthday of james moody and can confirm that tito puente lives in the smile in those who heard his spirit sing tito puente had not only a smile in his heart but invaded the hearts of everybody who listened to his music and met him his heart and smile lives on in his music and still makes my heart and eyes smile ———————– Insane delusions A naked man armed with a Samurai sword attacked members of a church congregation because he believed they were demons, slashed with a sword and a knife. hes las name was Strang, age 26, strange name for a man with insane delusions denies seven charges of attempted . He was only overcome tackled him with a crucifix and an organ pipe, Mr Strang had gone to the church near his home in Brook Road on the morning of 28 November last year, believing the congregation was made up of demons who had taken on human forms. Insane delusions told the jury that the facts of the case were not in dispute, was he insane. If they decided he was insane they would have to return verdicts of not guilty through insanity, which would allow the judge to ensure he was treated in such a way as to protect the public, Mr Strang sat in the dock dressed in a smart suit suffering from schizophrenia and voices told him to go and attack the people “He was suffering insane delusions that the people he was attacking were not human beings but demons who had taken on human form. “He did not appreciate the true nature of what he was doing. He was so deluded that he did not know he was doing anything wrong.” Serious injuries caused him “grave injuries”. used whatever was available to try to overpower Mr Strang. One person had used someone’s Zimmer frame, another had grabbed a crucifix, the court heard. Off-duty policeman managed to push Mr Strang away with an organ pipe and he was then overpowered by others. result of blows from the sword. “Some were caused while attempting to escape ferocious and sustained attacks. “The attack ended only because of the bravery of some of the congregation.” in hospital, Mr Strang was asked why he had done it and said: “I am passing judgment.” He had accused the churchgoers of worshipping false idols. Tragic life In a strange statement read in court, Mr Strang’s wife Michelle said her husband had no specific religion but saw himself as “the servant of God”. Over the years, he had become more interested in religion and shortly before the attack had read an article about pagan worship. He had been made redundant from his computer job in had taken to spending the day in bed reading the Bible, She said her husband had had a tragic life: He was bought up by his grandmother in Glasgow and said he had been stabbed three times there. Mrs Strang said her husband had talked of taking her away from “Satan’s world” and on another occasion that he was married to God. He had left the house after taking a bath and then a woman had knocked on her door pleading with her to call the police because there “was a mad man with a sword” at the church, she said. The hearing was adjourned until Friday. ——————————————– drowned in grief not as it was what was emerging against myself ominous enchanted with grief treasured forever in memory obscenity with out precedent terror of a grief that drowns itself don’t know how to explain grief unbearable mind not accustomed dismember the mind preparing for death for life pain that lives in the heart words cannot do justice word of advice see that you let anger eat you parting is such sweet sorrows surpassed exaggerations a great lie was created death is anticlimactic while the future vanished falling into state of grieving for the future depressing depression doomed to waste away a victim of grief don’t understand many things in life endured so much pain forgot it factory of grief a catastrophe has occurred but nothing can be done about it the truth is a memory becoming a vanished and unknown person cannot forget how bitter sweet history is the filter of history washes the filth away romance of tragedy is tragic endure life entering history siting behind close doors alone with your self summing up your life anyone who spits on the past hits the future different ways of being human saga of the inevitable ending breathe deep…. the riddle – rewritting history life a work of fiction. storm brewing Enigma rescued frightening thing climbed down the ladder life a work of fiction. it’s very important for tomorrow to understand struggle to keep cracking made free with rewritting history will continue Ironically the real hero in our minds – thinks it would make a great film. At first glance this is an action story about bravery and honour but it is also a story about vanity decryption scrambled There is some myth making and faking transmitted part of the message do not underestimate the belief of the myth being unbreakable starting points for the attack breaking the codes of myth of history what’s behind these riddles rewritten enigmas of life obsolete solving the unsolvable riddle accidental or deliberate in the course of time and trying to find reason to the rhyme i wonder how much is really just walking a fine line between accidental or deliberate as i try to liberate and not swallow the bait it seems that i am always waiting at the gate or am late or maybe some would say its just fate its either psychological state, innate or irate debate no use to recriminate or recreate or wear an armor plate for what is lying in wait will wait who knows it might be something great War heroes return life internal slow pilgrimage rescue from self – mission improbable and impossible negotiated the world evacuating the evacuation surrounded by dark and ominous clouds enormity has never left stuck out of luck waiting for war heroes return who rescues the rescuers Expected to Recover in critical but stable condition desert Mirage but the prognosis was good as i sit thinking about what it all means and who understood but in the end who knows if what is good is good and if to recover one needs to recover from recovery as in giving up one slavery for another slavery we just change the names to protect the innocent and that is descent intent but expected to recover to uncover to discover to become your own lover to rediscover dueling with the mind should or should i not and all that rot should or should i not and all that rot a child’s rhyme she loves me she loves me not trapped in a rerun running in the same spot frightened myself with who inhabits the uninhabitable inside me/you/us indictment of negligence by soul and innocence ones personalities clawing for attention obsessions compulsions compulsions obsessions dancing between fleeting mindless images between nonsense and the profound in search of finding and being found retrenching inside the recesses, dark corners of the mind trying to escape the escape escape the inescapable mirror the world and its ways crawling inside out a silent shout dueling mind and mindlessness enter the revolving door of discarded notions of miscarriages of justice and injustice fighting with me/you/us like a gladiator shadow boxing the shadow of the mirage of distortions and discontent that creep and crawls beyond the beyond and into my/your/our all nuances… a bit unsettling to be reminded shame too common conflict between the dueling minds of sanity and fear of being discovered, uncovered nude… the other reality a deformity of mindless enormity swimming up stream in a dream conclusive evidence is inconclusive where are the roots of moral judgment dismantling of chaos and confusion order in disorder fusion and i quote.. “psychiatry is based on the belief “the mastery of bad circumstances is inherent to what a person is … the sense of a person is of someone who has overcome suffering in a particular way and forged a specific path through life.” and to continue with the quote “We live in a society obsessed with blame…. threatens an individual’s humanity… … one we can’t afford to ignore.” ignore ignore have we not all sold our selves to ignorance to ignore become in some way a commodity on a shelf a strange to our own selves become a prostitute a whore and what more and what about the never ending rerun the dueling mind at war with you/me/us itself when what you might find inside the mind is something sad and not very kind so, better to duel the mind then commit mental suicide by default by self inflicted design oldest philosophical dilemmas what it is to be a person, frozen words ruthless words not wanting to change where your are betrayed justified ruthlessness work ethics.. unmanly reproach throwing the unspeakable winding up profound revelation surprise me it would surprise me life determined by fears panic attack many layered thing supense of dying loss part of armor coming into own moving forward in life protected from the passage of being the next in line fell from the trapeze into the safty net made apparent defy defying resonating hell of a lot to complain about if you could imagine at a critical point suffering from the delusion egregious sin contaminated grief death bed snooping jotting severed connection looking on pernitious neutrality primary value is love poetry and music the world has never seen beor heart felt confidence unconscious mind suddenly can’t defining lymph with emotion writing more like remembering cathartic consoling fear all we have in common dominating serious thought what went wrong agonizing question abandoned remedy making great efforts to avoid the choice what ever the cost engage the world floating an idea no serious question many lessons to be learned we believed in and support mislleading and misguided self image self deception unreasonably unreasonable and thwarted and rewarded dwarfed but in life there are more than meets they for reasons i am sure many of us wished we knew why but why of why doesn’t answer the many lessons to be learned life is dangerous but we must try disappearing thought existence doesn’t exist Mythinformation i sit and ponder whether now or yonder we shall find that we live die and why and that we are victims of our own mythification and mystification that is beyond our comprehension we are lost in a storm trying to be like everybody the norm and yet we have this memory of the placental warm i can hear bees swarm and time begins to fade time is short and someday we have to pay piper if we want to play Mythinformation We just don’t know where this thing is going to end up is all i have to say unearthing a secret escaping time unlike any seen before stiched together seeking truth returning to the source uneasy the tree of life concealing gripped tantalizing glimpses glitter in the sun the face turned into ice passed onto the other world quest just begun how do we live how do we die coming together intertwined expression of life intriguing puzzle direct link to the past covering the unwanted return to where we come from carefully preparing for eternity?” What does it matter if the myth crumbles a bit, if the portrait presented is not identical to the imagined Unsurprisingly, surviving abandoned without explanation wasted by distress and unconsummated loves. glory discovered not for sharing. Nothing more personal to an artist than his creation given youth, money, love, courage, nothing belongs to you nonetheless pattern of breakups and reconciliations with the self and others imagined to be the thorny red rose on asteroid promise that one day will turn into the dream princess who always awaits the little prince claim share of legacy assumed the mantle of the fallen hero though a bit forgotten fascination with tragic figures bizarrely in parentheses — pulled up in a fisherman’s net stirring endless debate and speculation we are always in search of the day of glory the final resting place finally found the time and peace attack on innocence life is fragil change life beyond control within control take you through the changes fire bell in the night consumed appreciate the little things in life finding memories things yet to be descovered on parade in the june heat in the city walking walking into the night down 23rd street watching all the crowds pass by one by one they go by as i wonder to myself what they are all doing and why as people flock like sheep as if the were in a chain gang of the mind lock one after the other looking like one another wearing their personalities, costumes and masquerading and always on stage parading as i stand there watching all the crowds pass bye wondering what they are all doing and why and me and my eye know i too, am one of the crowds living a lie as i watch myself watching myself try to fly trying to catch a birds eye view and wonder if they are i and i are they or just stranger in a Shakespearean play as the parade goes by as i wonder to myself what they are all doing and why and another bird in my imagination says wake up don’t fall asleep don’t die come away come away lets fly and somewhere something says you can’t escape for i am the maker of my own lie ntempted.- The urge to read poetry into things is universal tribute to george segal “I couldn’t divorce myself from the sensual things of life — things I could touch,” george segal explained. edging toward almost unconsciously. pushed toward reality need to achieve own grasp presence of man in his daily life initially thought unusual emotional the body reveals certain truths about itself resigned self to a life anointed attests concisely broad appeal As he put it, “I count heavily on the human ability to spot metaphor. The urge to read poetry into things is universal.” what would happen if we ventured into real space? into reality almost unconsciously. strong sense of social conscience striving to remember the unforgettable memory isn’t a fixative, Recollected images can’t be trusted, especially when they seem truest to life and memory is too often veiled by feeling. witnessed through the eyes of frozen corpses in and out of time, impression retraced and erased extraordinary, unclassifiable inner life, of widening and ontracting circles of thoughts dangling ambition security is insecure memories deceive the deceiver patterns of coincidence fold into the fates of others. circuitous, irresolute; the more learn about the past, the more the past shrinks. followed a recollected journey into the coincidental spending hours walking the streets of the mind hoping to lose self meandering, thwartedby the limitations of reason, the unforgettable imagination or will-power, and obliged to turn and turn again turning over back and forth again the tighter the net of connections becomes Kafka like memories suffering from an almost overflowing misery as if ordained by a justice not of this world Retracing the journey striving to remember the unforgettable The madness intellectual pleasure lives in lies challenges the truth reveals the moment to escape extraordinary a coincidence, inaccessible to even the most incisive tightens the net when remembering great escape to sail aimlessly from place to place without moving foraging for yet unborn remembrances imagery of the imagined truth of the past puzzled lost in a revolving door repeating the unrepeatable the mis-represented the mis-understood recreating the past the future the unforgetable can’t escape far from becoming far from ending far from being things now appeared to be more incomprehensible than ever images like memories marching left right left right insearch of life gathered from past the past and beyond the future the more unlikely it seems that the past had actually happened Most of it is absurd model of consciousness and unconsciousness to be fully aware of oneself in ones time is to suffer incurable and unconceivable mysteries striving to remember the unforgettable don’t know why why i am drawn to such remembrances of things that touched the untouchable the umbillical cord that runs through me that move through time and space that danced between the spaces that once was full of child like innocence and grace… laughing at and with me and you and that tore at the soul of my being and took the truth and beauty out of trust and innocence and left shells and holes like the walking wounded… and why – in search of the never ending beginning of the beginning when wonder was wonder and trust was to be trusted – memories of trying to fill the empty holes to be filled with the dance of time and the dance of beyond me and beyond you as i try and find myself inside the hole in my soul to keep stumbling inside as if in a drunken stupor in the shadows of moments that were dream like entwined arms, legs, bodies inside out souls wrapped around filling the spaces where dreams once filled and now only illusive memories – imagination… i walking around inside as if a stranger inhabits my body wondering and looking out of eyes that have seen nothing and everything and yet i have looked in the mirror and you the you that is me is not there to keep me warm as in my memories of a time before time in a moment when truth and innocence collided into themselves where i who was once i and now feel unwhole and un-holy and lost in space and in search of something between the spaces wait and listen to and for the sound of silence… as if time has been stopped or stolen and memories torment and torture themselves in a dance on the horizons of my inner being for something to fill that which is now between what was and was not as i search the unforgettable and unforgiven traces of lasting and lofty ideas of what i believed was the unstoppable the incomprehensible the unimaginable… and child like happiness illusive and now prisoner of the unforgiving task master of the mind that forgives not and forgets not and revolves around itself like a baby in the womb rolling around in its primordial being bursting out from unborn thoughts into a confusing world of contradiction of what is and what is not asks in the quiet stifled scream that can be seen in the unspoken look of a death row prisoner and the guard – both asking and looking deeply into each others eye and soul insearch for something to console – and asks the never ending question of what are we to learn from all of this and why and what for are we born … and no answers comes for the soul has no words for the mind for it is as a mute visitor a spectator who brings life but in the end is more often than not… who we are is not… only the stranger the personality the custom the masquarade is who is us…for we humans have done the unconscionable and made ourselves into an inanimate object a thing a commodity to discard like we discard everything else in our search for control for security for vanity for power, for proving that we are above who we are for trying to be in-human and un-feeling -un-touched and un-touchable and in destructable until in the end the most untouchable eventually self destructs… and the child cries and ask there must be something that we are missing… what is life – are we so removed as to not to hear feel the warmth, the voice of the sun, the moon, the birds the bees the animals the trees… we are what we are not… i hear myself the child within scream inside out while waiting to hear the unheard the unhearable… … who are you who am i who are we that holds on to distant memories of the promised land of dream and asks where do these dreams come and go to and from… and in the end what do we have to say about our voyage and who we are… and maybe the answer is the question, who are we?…. ——————- (look for end) collapsing under the weight of its own mistaken reality recycled material’ errors that cause individual cases to pop into the public eye reality is a process that is epidemic throughout the system, state of mind to state of state and year to year.” report A Broken System Error Rates most common errors led to reversals of reality post-conviction stage reality is ineffective useless to assist counsel the counselors very egregious for who ever and what ever and for ever and ever whatever that means i defend the defendants for reality is cruel unsympathetic un-un and pathetic to say the un sayable defendants prosecute the prosecutor withholding evidence of innocence and i am innocenct the jury of peer who have no peers and i accuse reality of negligence and racial discrimination and in-humanity to you-mans select a jury sight was cited as reason for reversal.of reality said the overall rate of serious error found to be reliable. based on research into reality court records of the three stages of reality is un real review before they reached level state direct appeal state is unreal one of the prosecutors who tried reality for the realist said help provide a factual, rather than an emotional basis for the debate on punishment of reality death sentences were actually implemented and thinking that would be difficult to accept if you were a victim or believed in reality you were lost in finality and finally who favors reality and the death penalty of reality in very limited circumstances. It tells me that we probably are putting too much reality into too many people we and reality are on trial for death of reality sentences cases that shouldn’t have been death of reality from the outset.” error rates was counter-intuitive. how many people are wrongfully convicted i ask you Based on the death of reality system is more than 99 percent accurate in that more than 99 percent of the time the system identifies the proper reality. There is no claim that anyone has been wrongfully executed for being unreal had caught reality and mistakes at a rate of 18 percent. suggested something there is not happening as a death of realty proponent argued the judges there are doing their job and maybe we should move reality to California where liberal judges are going on their personal views of reality and conservative have given up and abandoned reality study found an overall error rate of reality at 87 percent in California and 52 percent in Texas. 23 years worth of results reveal reality and death of reality system collapsing under the weight of its own mistakes, They reveal a system in which lives and public order are at stake, yet for decades reality has made more mistakes than we would tolerate in far less important unrealistic activities definitive cases of reality and innocent people having been executed but according to the Death of reality Information Center public policy group, 87 people have been released from death row since 1973 — eight were cleared evidence and the rest for a variety of unrealistic reasons recanted testimony reality is not real to evidence overlooked really or withheld reality is inadequate 66 percent of Americans still support the death of reality sentence fewer than just six years ago, when support reached its peak at 80 percent. The U.S. Supreme Court reinstated the death of reality penalty in 1976. Efforts to make changes to the reality system levels are underway reexamining reality, life and death penalty practices Last month, the state of reality legislature symbolically abolished the death of reality made it known she would veto the measure and no one was on death row or at home in a bid to pass a reality check bill that would give people convicted of serious violent crimes the right to present DNA evidence that may not have been available at the time of their initial conviction. some times life and reality are just a figment of our own fiction… as we are fictional characters in our own lives… and so reality is unreal and we and nobody exists… ———————————— poetry a prayer words strung together into a metaphore a prayer soul searching for an inspirational vision of the essence of who we are trying to find itself/ourselves in a metaphore to release us from being prisoners of an internal infernal police a prayer on butterfly wings trying to land trying to land inside out to reach within and without a poem that spreads its mysterious spell a prayer to wake us up from our strange self-imposed hell ———————- notes from interview with bruce sprinstein on charlie rose the road not taken the road not taken leaving off verring off protecting self and identity decision that where left off what is the promise heavy handed ploding along what ever happened wish responsible for way back when coming out of pain and not out of joy could go on about it closely observed how to walk internalizing being watch tend to write about things you are trying to understand who where you coming out of the fire things that you carry putting in context and make sense of not easy to understand shyed away born out of rage out of rebellion come up out of and into autobiographical defining moment what you need not having to fake it to make sense or not about time coming back together helped to understand learn by experiences internalizing everything honor the people who taught us things handed down how you find yourself place in the world try to be patient be there not run serious wishes you don’t know what a moment might bring life work of art constructed in head small incident which had no apprent meaning are the essence of what it is all about capacity to dig deep to resonant worker harder than next guy what kinda person are you are you a watcher an observer art is about watching how things interrelate observation variety of disfunctions something positive rather than destructive writing leads into different kind of details come in at the bottom you don’t know walking in don’t know what the response trying not to look up obvious connections present you with something never heard never seen before manage life manage identity if you know what you want to do and sure of who you are people listen allow you to be yourself always a struggle hold on to identity what do we owe the past the past future debt you can never repay deep involvement going there whats going on tracing back trying to make sense of it shock of recognition how do you do that drawing from life one hit wonder implication came up out of trying to understand the concept of relation ship to life mode of behavior walk down the street interact place in the world a part of the fabric whats holding the world together struggling to find and go the way we live and think about our selves seeing both sides when not present anger and pain and destructive force don’t know where you are going and who you are debasement of our selves coopted whatever was policy of destructiveness disparity of wealth think harder connection to idea different today than yesterday depth of connection give resonance write from entirety of experience driven to be driven to write steeped in don’t forget it go for long periods of time have an idea or not gestating hard to believe difficult periods forcing self moving in and out down their mining a gold vein social implications redescovered imeptus drawn into social theme find satisfaction see stories refind place inself dialog having with myself urgent issues inside of me reconnecting with myself what want to do see things in head what is not included things that facinate things that come up at a particular moment waiting to see what presents itself don’t know what its going to be come out of does something out of ones head where came from and want to go going back reconnect to particular feeling we are not we the impossible dream a possible dream a little sacrafice a little precious time escaping myself into the dream back and forth confessional results of pushing into not leaving hang out afraid to put self on the spot push push in or be pushed out patients becomes become patient accomidates the situation lost and found time moves beyond space and beyond myself when a possible dream become an impossible dream when we are not we believing in the myth set of haunting images wounded by history and the future small things come expecting to find curiosity living day to day what became of dreams tradition small details journey taken observer of all things no big story to tell significant story in simple things moment of truth not going to ruin dream becoming what you wish profound change amorphous work not idol of life in love with the past to escape romance vanished over worship of words change emphasis of the myth roots lie adapting to new realities renovation is necessary awareness of the myth rhetoric out of touch with what doing don’t yet have the language one more abstraction symbolic entity defining life weight by haunting myth exagerated these things mean something take things too seriously it is not what it was and it never was what it was sailed into hopeless sink the minions words do not give your name and theres engraved into history where am i i am not yet born : caught in the act of being yourself what does this mean learning the hard way comfortable needs gone into heart and mind creeps into thoughts blowing out of proportion reading eyebrows just the beginning coherence who am i who are you being is what what is being caught uncaught fraught with naught back up against the wall consequences how to deal with this what message are we doing lost sleep over and over opportunity don’t you find that odd did you really heard that or did you hear that are you there the voice behind the pen and paper carrying an immortal mission carry on carry on immortality is mortal mortality is immortal chanted to open carry on carry on immortality is mortal mortality is immortal held no significance in response to will and in affirmation wisest of the wise and the greatest of the great methodically paved the way for the ascendancy dogma dominated casting doubt on willingness to dismantle the system blame for a retreating change in the command toward diverse experience carry on carry on immortality is mortal mortality is immortal confident and optimistic will continue a difficult and noble mission carrying an immortal mission carry on carry on immortality is mortal mortality is immortal leaving behind symbols. a far-flung fall into disarray avoiding the fate consumed getting too much stimulation capitalize on the allure How to convey this humor and truth Something has to give sometime going to be disappointed devote more time to life pathetic abandoning become boring never heard of you unfazed the write/poet argues with himself and words in a fight to the end of time and all for what and why as i creap into a metaphore that has lived before and whats more leaving behind another symbol while sewing with my mother’s thimble trying to be nimble the imagination of the entire world more to do with fiction than fact more to do with fiction than fact it is no small wonder long gripped imagination being viewed as a way for without harming the environment at a time when other forces are threatening to speed its depletion. better integration with the rest expected to increase pressure on precarious infrastructure, traditional threats question of survival we are becoming part of diversity produces riches defend the rational exploitation of the environment eyeing the potential breaking into hype the market spectacular history of failures aim to capitalize on the allure of romance the imagination of the entire world, more to do with fiction than fact no small wonder the wonder of wonder is no small wonder but without wonder where would we be if we were not under the protective slumber the thunder of wonder and curiosity and discovery inquire, marvel, question, wonderment, amazement, astonishment, to contemplate, happening, mull over, muse, ponder, query, react, reflect, respond, ruminate, speculate, awe, inquisitiveness, lust for, thirst for its no small wonder that children are full of wonder mysterious masquerading object in and of its death throes a mysterious object that may be a part of you/me/us is in and out of its death throes, or a pair of aging stars masquerading as a single youngster.defies all known classificationsdust-enshrouded star with narrow jets of material resembling strings of beads emanating from it, the scientists said Thursday.shedding matter from its outer layers. This matter is then captured by gravity in a rotating accretion disk around a compact partner, most likely a young white dwarf, the collapsed remnant of a sun-like star, JPL scientists said. probe the mysteries of the mind and explain the wonders nothing is what it seems howling at the moon moment in the sun wounded inside hatred is destructive mindful of ideal and talk tears streaming fulfill potential come together know the pain frustrated painful secret we all pay the price… time to regenerate re assimilation don’t alter the facts naive to claim objective not optional trying to find a way home at some point you have to let go no better no worse life is a gift don’t want to lose it again small minded seeing the world through the eyes of others eroding the next frontier claiming the possibilities looking back to the future overwhelmed by self open and without shame a crying shame no answer as to why compelling drama when i was young all things were possible when i was young all things were possible i ran with the deer, danced with the mountain goats and played with the antelopes when i was young i could out run the wind, supple and sure footed as the cat was i, i was strong, strong as could be, i stood tall, tall as the tallest tree i soared with the eagles, played with the dolphins and laughed with the wind when i was young and full of spirit all things were possible i wandered my life through the landscapes of endless images i became a warrior, and as a warrior i saw many things i battle the battle of wounded spirits saw many faces, faces full of fear and quiet desperation i fought with the spirit of sisyphus and sisyphus fought inside of me i fought with the heart of the lion the vision of the owl the speed of the cheetah and the wisdom of the bear i wandered from many winters and fought the battle of endless dreams when i was young all things were possible now that i am old all things are still possible in my mind lilacs and roses and spring i can almost hear by me spring is almost here listen, hear the winters whisper begins and ends and falls away like a cat or dog winter sheds its joys its fears and time moves towards a warm and gentler place and i in my way hibernate within and without prepare to say good bye to my wintery self and sprout to say goodbye to sitting by the warmth of my imaginary fireplace and to my old and new me and me squeezing the last moments beyond and before for the moment when birds come by and sit on my minds eye i can almost hear the sounds of spring birds singing and the call of timeless time begins its thing and what was and will be and the future of you and me and what is to be or not to be rising up and out of the slumber of dreams to wake up to where spring and lilacs and roses sing and the sweet smell of spring and the sound of a passing bicycles ring and blue birds and honey suckles and lovers dancing and thoughts prancing and kids jumping through themselves and into you and into me listen carefully… i can almost hear you smile, as the wind whispers its almost spring and life begins its play and new songs to sing story is far from over by me ny times article on Caravaggio The story is far from over and i mull it over and over head to foot and cover to cover and here is Caravaggio unknown and dead for an eternity and then discovered for the wonder of his wonder and i wonder too about my own story and will it be over when its over or will it go on from cover to cover from head to foot and will the train go by my grave and go toot toot and will people come and visit it/me like i visited igor stravinsky on cemetery island in venice where Caravaggio painted near by or is the story over when the story is history or will it just begin and what do i care if i am out or in does it mean anything if i am good or sin or is it enough that i have been here and i have lived and took and gived and in the end what does it mean if you forgot or lost the dream so why not just scream for innocence lost and the dreamers dream and go on and dream about being a sun beam life is but a dream sometimes i want to scream it ain’t a dream its not what it seems row row your boat gently down the stream its not what you say its what you mean i got sunshine on a cloudy day and that the soul of some way what can make you feel this way songs of the doop and the tmeptations and life is but a dream and what can one do but what one does is what i mean and then well what its all about i acts of unconscionableness that shock the sense in too and out of its senses seems to increase our shock resistance than to resist and i insist that maybe we are so shock resistant that nothing can touch us except maybe poetry and art that goes deepest into the heart… its a cry from the soul as if being torn apart and locked up inside the shocked up inside in all of us is a consciousness of us that is beyond even us home of funeral sign 6th and 8th on 14 street in mad-hattan the home of funerals and i stop and think of the last resting place and home home on the range as i pass by on my way to dreams that fly as my feet stop don’t ask me why maybe its that i just had something sweet or that i am in heat as i think about fun and the unreal and fun-ereal are unreal and how i don’t go to funerals because they don’t celebrate life but death and more strife and are strange and surreal as i think about how nobody passes go and the monopoly that we all know and it doesn’t matter who you know when your or my time comes well who knows… lost shadows (Roosevelt ave station) lost shadows of sunshine beyond time of rhymes that are stuck in time as i watch the shadows of people walking by people who have spent their day if i may say their life times in pursuit of what i ask myself what is it that makes us us as i watch the shadows going in and out some bent over others old and young walking about races and places of people from near and far as i watch a drunk weaving to and fro and think he must of just come from a bar and i think empty thought and things between lines of a dreams wondering about why the guy across the platform is laughing and screams as a homeless man yells back some unintelligible themes and i wonder what will become of the them that is me as i try to see through all the mirages and appearances as the train disappears between me and time as the lost shadows stare in the night and i take refuge inside my warmth as everything fades out of sight lone wolf lone wolf what does it really mean i for one seem to swing from beam to light beam often it seems going up against the stream spending most of my adult years it seems throwing spears between my ears as i a loner and alone at least inside my own mind i find its sometimes more kind moving language/images images lurk like notes of the unscalable scale swirling in my mind on a seesaw of ripples to the sound of the language that you and i hear from steeples and on and on voice speaking volumes of images and images speak in the language of camouflage and moving at the speed of light and sometimes we find a little insight to in-cite spectator observing the observer in a mirror i am seer and served beyond me and you observing the observer beyond what is what and what is true is me and you spectator of the the spectacle a comedy del arte wearing a mask i see what i see the observer is you in intellectual fencer even though i sit on a fence looking at the world kinda dense i find an undefinable defense which makes some kinda sense and yet intense intellectual sitting on a fence clues you can’t miss or you’re lost there are some clues you can’t miss whatever or whomever you kiss it’s like this if you like me live in an abyss and are clue less of this then all i can say is maybe someday you’ll stumble on bliss or if you do not pay attention you’ll stumble on something else you would rather not kiss the milieu of uncertainty in the middle of the middle and in between the between but before the end ends and somewhere it depends… there is the middle of the milieu where i and you its true its true uncertainty is us too so what else is knew… just hanging on hanging on to an illusion that hangs on and on and like this verse in visa verse and inverse and reverse no matter who what where and when is on we need to just hang on and wait for the little bon bons victim of disappointment victim of parts of the sum sometimes just plain dumb sometimes life is just a bum run but to be disappointed by disappointment is treated by anointment that needs no appointment and the only ointment is adroit-ment diminishing hope hope of hope hopelessly tied up with a dope light dimming sinners sinning spinners spinning tall and short tales around and around the world of innocence fading i try evading as diminished minds and mediocrity blinds sad to say hope for you-manity is on the the verge of insanity underground – this is not a movie (#1train line) (response to Turkish earthquake) while ridding the #1 subway line i am thinking of all those who have been buried alive and now lie on a Turkish ice skating rink in a line this is not a rhyme for those who have lost time but an introspection on under ground for those who watch and watched themselves die because they where trapped and unfound what confounds and is beyond me and my imagination is what i would think and do you see what can you do when you’re trapped and can’t flee as the E train comes at 42nd st and times square trapped inside out mind and body in a death defying stare at that which you can’t escape or compare or at least beyond my little worlds unfair affair the train stops at 5th and 53 as the announcer says next stop lexington avenue and i think about those who are and are not and will never be and what goes before them as they stop and try and see and what does one do when you see yourself fading from view and you are one of the many and few who are trapped friend and foe in a strange common zoo and i think about the damaged souls over and under the stone as the light fades and faces and beings faces death all alone as i too am trapped between the lines hopelessly trying to chisel to refine and define the undefinable last moments queens plaza the conductor says no R train as i hold my disdain again for the ny city underground subway as a subway vendor walks buy selling live longer batteries and i see a passing billboard that says last gasp of summer and i think about the nature of nature and of summer fading and the people gasping their last gasp and grasping and holding on to life in hopeless hope and dead yet still a live not living not dying and who we are and what we are and how we are still slaves to mortality as i imagine the revolving nursery rhymes and images and things running around and now i gently lay myhead down to sleep and little bo peep and counting sheep as a voice from afar wakes me up from my daydream sleep and says Roosevelt avenue connect to the future as i see a billboard sign – race for awareness and stare in aweness at how you-manity and all its insanity and lack of awareness as i slip back into images of the melting Turkish ice skating palace and the line of now bodies that once held forgotten gift of life and warmth have now turned into things as i think of how we turn in moment from a person to a thing and like a bird can no longer fly nor sing as i hear the train bell ring as i get out of the train station and look up at the sky and think of you-manity and i and wonder how and why conjugation of conjugal conjugating the future past and present tense while sitting on on the conjugal fence and in my defense i say only that conjugating conjugal are intense some times makes sense are full of pretense and though this may sound to some like a punishable offense i say enjoy yourself life is short stop being dense and stop this nonsense poetry what’s it words strung together in a line that searches the recesses trying to decide and define itself in such a design as to reach beyond the world of our little confine to fish with bait hook and line for a fine string of words to catch on a line empty bookshelves now where once stood memories i stand in front of where Goethe and Thomas Mann lived together stands an empty book shelve where great and not so great writers once played writing words in the sky words like birds in a flock strung together on the fly and now where once stood i and now stands a ghost town bare as i spy what once was dreams and thoughts of the past present and future that could and could not be bought and all for what one should and ought but anyway i was caught in the struggle to find and refine and remember my own mine and the puzzle of the puzzles as i might someday too have words that once flew that sit a on some book shelf or mind of a few of you joined in pain symbol of hope never forgot never ever lets be honest have mercy on us dreams burried eternal flame as a message of hope new nothing going on sustain tribute to never forget bright light treasured messages the thought of you no place to go in shock obsessed nightmares brought back living wound exhausted maintain sanity move backward/forward in life pull back the layers symbol of hope cannot surrender who goes first how much time running out wasting time say something different welding to the unyielding why are you doing this not in wildest dreams on the run hiding in extrodinary places dangerous if you remember somewhere in own evolution what is it about snap shot of the moment tells something say something surrender to yourself see world in a certain way life is a re-enactment don’t know what you know it can happen split second tells the universe interesting exercise safety break everything else is an afterthought a happy victim out cry safe heaven silent epidemic misreading to reach into the human heart hope for the best and ideal mythical life not unbelievable running iinto ourselves transcending reality funning out of time where ideas spring over wrought look back at a time before time hiding from life history repeated and repeats itself in your mind to the human spieit will live forever a work in progress looking towards the future of the past symbology ahead of reality pushed into extinction coexisting or quikly dying out stranded on a deserted island the secret behind what if survived by becoming small eluding extinction the last question why existed on the margin no evidence ever existed more than an academic exercise the futurer of ourselves and elephants faded amid unfulfilled expectations. pictures of joy No margin of error was given. wake up from history should not be forgotten appropriate actions > straddle the divide > > explosion of disbelief > a mark of contradictions Writing is a lonely pursuit reason for being herebitterly alone

fighting with the wind

encountering the past that rides on the winds of the mind in a sort of dream world between here and there and where ever where is… encountering the past as if riding on a dream

wondering what history teaches us or maybe the wind listens and we are deaf for we seem to repeat the same soap operas

wondering around like lost souls

what draws us to the myth of the un-understandable trying to catch dreams which way the winds looking for the lost history where ever i go i search for me hard time see where we are going against all odds against all imagination

my universe if full of poetry… i keep on writing poetry in my mind… realizing that it is what it is and i don’t even care to write it down just to enjoy the winding road of my free form mind while wandering and wondering through the landscapes of this and that and thensome and so i play with the thought of what is and what is not and then i just laugh at my self for playing around with my self and it is just a moment between me and myself and i smile to myself and i swallow the sun as it laughs at me and i laugh at it and all is well as the clock strikes the hours and the hour runs off with the minute hand in search of a second only to find it can never catch itself and yet there is no winners only is and i think of you in me and me in you and i feel and feel i and i think to myself how could we be we and we be not we and i laugh knowing i am me and i am you and you are you and you are me where ever we be and there is no winners only is…

more or less the truth and nothing but the whole truth so help us and save us from ourselves as time marches on and we march on

and on and out of ourselves into the beginning of the beginning… freeing me from mediocre thoughts and childish memories of lost innocence and dreams of dreams that that only existed in a dream of my mind and i think to my self where have i been… and i see in you where i have and have not been and louis armstrong whispers in my ear what a wonderful life it could be and i think no more but dream of making sandcastles at the sea shore and myself in myself and playing with illusions of being/living more or less in a strangely practical world a world with out dreams without imagination

poems from green book

man dancing with his shadow to the sound of distant echoes trains into he night growling at each other as they pass inches apart between life and death and the newspapers headline “oh no not again” as i think of where and when and then i see a show dancing where you and i had once been once a pregnant woman once gave birth to me

the Q train

train of trains the Q train roars in to west 4 it could be hollywood and vine or another sign as the B train pulls in and i wonder to be or not to be as i get on the F train to Brooklyn place of my youth and the forgotten me i am fond of the F train for reasons i fear not enough space to make it clear but the F is just fine and i think of it as mine as memories reclaim the me and my mine

a mother holds her baby in her mind

a man walks by walking his imaginary child a replacement for love lost sadness and longing hangs heavy unthinkable things have happened unintended consequences and circumstance bring our life together a poem a few words dancing on a line just thinking of how fine is a fine line and in these moments we are we you and me don’t you see

mourning an illusion a man walks into a mirror holding a scissors in one had and in his other his heart and soul and the band played on as the rooster crowed in his mind and he couldn’t find his human-kind strange the things we find in the mirror though we are blind pizza on my mind

pizza pizza no other word i can think of sounds or taste like it pizza from place to place is as different as day and night and yet i grew up on pizza and spaghetti too my favorite since i was 2 and you?

it’s spring love has sprung all around man and woman are hung rung to rung climbing the ladders to the sky people learning to fly higher than high its a dream you can see in the eye

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